Tegan grunted as her fingers reached deeper into her core. The now cold water from the shower falling on her back cooled her down, but it didn't take away the feeling she was experiencing. Now only slightly pulsing inside herself, she curled her long digits against the little organ that loved to be touched. Her knees felt weak and she let out a whiny moan. She bit on her lower lip, her other hand tightly pinching a nipple to a point and pulling, adding the pain that she desired. She leaned against the nearest tile wall, feeling herself get closer to the edge. Eyes closed and head thrown back, Tegan thought of the best sex she had ever had.
"Tegan, I'm so close," it was barely a whisper and the words were hushed together but she clearly heard her sister from above her. Pecking her lover's clit, she crawled her way up Sara's teenage body, licking every bit of skin she could. Her twin's hips were covered in nail marks and decorated with bite marks, but Tegan did not hesitate to add more.
Her lips wrapped around Sara's nipple and she bit down hard, making the body below her thrash around the bed.
"T-Tegan, please!"
Tegan remembered that day and it only added fuel to the fire she needed to put out. Moving her hips against her hand, her clit got plenty of delicious pressure against the palm of her hand. With breathy, whiny moans, she humped her own digits, hips on overdrive. She thought of Sara's curvaceous body and she wondered if Sara would sound the same she did 20 years ago when Tegan made her come against her mouth. The thought of making her twin come, as a 38 year old woman, pushed her over the edge. She couldn't hold back the moans that flew from her mouth.
"S-Sara!". It was loud, high and very uncharacteristic of her.
Shivering, she rinsed away the evidence of her 'session', turning her body to face the cold shower spray. Closing her eyes, she tipped her head back and thought of the last few months.
Greece had been amazing. The sisters went there on a whim, fighting their Virgo impulses to plan every little detail. They had more than enough in their bank accounts to afford the luxury of a sea-side hotel room and delicious food at the snap of their fingers. They had plenty of heavy make out sessions that left them wanting each other more, hips pushed against one another's, bodies hot and hands twitching to touch each other.
Sara had also cut her hair; the moment that she arrived home, the day before they were meant to leave for their vacation, Tegan saw her sister adorning a haircut very similar to hers and her face broke into a grin. She remembered approaching a very shy Sara, and softly curling her fingers through her counterparts' now short hair. A part of Tegan loved the aspects of individuality that they had established, but a bigger part of her adored when they had "twin" moments. She had leaned in and kissed Sara softly on the lips, before telling her that she looked good. Sara blushed.
Tegan contemplated on this past year, not just the vacation that brought the sisters closer, but all of the activism and fighting they had done for their community. She truly felt so good and proud of all the hard work they had done together, knowing that it was no easy feat. She replayed all of Sara's words in her head and admired her open dialogue with complete strangers. She remembered the feeling of falling in love with Sara for the first time and how she felt this sick shame for it. She didn't understand what was happening, because one moment she may have thought a girl was pretty but the very next one, she was fighting the impulses to kiss her twin. She remembered when her mom got Sara dental dams a few weeks after Sara had come out and how her sister had turned 30 shades of red, quickly grabbing them from their mom and ran to her room, avoiding eye contact with Tegan.
After turning off the water, she quickly dried off and applied a moisturizer to her skin. After combing her hair, she wrapped her tattoo-covered body in a towel and walked into the master bedroom. She was not expecting Sara to be there, sitting on the bed, dressed in smart black pants and a grey striped sweater. Her feet were bare, crossed over one another.
"O-oh, sorry, Sare. Just getting some clothes," the eldest muttered. She couldn't look at her sister, hoping her sister hadn't heard what she was doing in the shower. The twins, though more comfortable with being together and kissing, had abstained from sex. It bewildered Tegan how Sara could keep their composure during times when all she wanted was to push Sara's hand into her underwear. But, she also remembered that it was the best thing for the both of them. Sara was still sensitive and hesitant; not as much as before, but still present, and so they had agreed to see Sara's therapist together for guidance. It had been a year full of growth, both mental and emotional. She quickly walked over to the closet and started to pick out a pair of boy shorts, looking over her shoulder to Sara's general direction.
Sara didn't answer, but simply lifted her head and made eye contact with her lover. She quickly licked her dry lips and cracked the knuckles in her right hand.
"What…," she swallowed thickly, "what were you doing in the shower, Tee?"
Oh, just touching myself about the first time I went down on you. But you knew what my hands were doing, didn't you?
Blushing, Tegan dropped her towel and leaned down to step into her underwear. Pulling them up her ample hips, she turned around and stood with fake confidence. Keeping the eye contact, she stretched her neck and smiled mischievously. "Honestly?", Sara nodded with her eyesight focused on Tegan's chest, so Tegan smirked. "I was masturbating, thinking of the first time I went down on you."
The oldest of them continued dressing and with pleasure, witnessed her twin's cheeks grow a rosy hue and her eyes close. When Sara bit her lip, Tegan knew that she was remembering that night, too.
Before she knew it, Sara was standing in front of her and pushing her up against the closet wall. Tegan's topless body was pushed against Sara's clothed one, and before she could wonder what was going on, Sara was sucking at her neck. Tegan felt her clit become alive once again, though she had already had a release that day. But that didn't matter, because with their lack of sex, Tegan's clit woke at a simple touch. It didn't take much, she was just human.
All too quickly, she felt a sharp bite right under the spot where her jaw met her crooked ear, and Sara was out of the room and wondering god knows where about the house. Tegan leaned against the wall, gasping, longing.
/
"Tegan, will you at least pretend to help? It was your idea to set up the Christmas tree, you know," Sara scowled. She was the one that brought the fake tree from storage, that cleared out a place in the living room for it and that had set it up. She also took all of the branches out, fluffing the tree up. Now, she was walking from the guest room with two large boxes of ornaments.
Tegan looked up at her sister from her phone, noticing how strong her hands looked. Those boxes seemed so safe. Yes, she was the one who suggested they set up the Christmas tree, but she didn't think Sara would take it seriously. Standing up from her place on the couch, she took one of the boxes from Sara's hands and walked it over to the corner where the tree was. She bent down to set it down and opened the flaps, the colors from the ornaments overwhelming her quickly. Sara did the same with her box, only hers had tinsel and lights.
"I think we should start with the lights," Tegan suggested. Sara seemed to agree because she reached down into her box to get the bundle of clear twinkly Christmas lights out, starting to unwrap it from itself. Tegan soon helped, pulling from one end, and Sara from the other.
"I don't understand why you wanted to do this, anyways. We haven't been huge about Christmas since our early twenties," Sara mumbled. She seemed concentrated on her end of the lights, eyebrows furrowed in deep thought. She was right, however, this year it would be the two of them alone. Last year, they had their mom to celebrate with, but this year, their mom and her partner were going on vacation.
Tegan bit her lip and looked shy before she answered. "I just wanted it to be special. It's just the two of us. And I want this to be memorable." She blushes at what she spoke, knowing she must've sounded childish. She wanted it to be special. "I know it's dumb and that we don't celebrate Christmas very much, but for the first time in over twenty years, I can wake up next to you on Christmas morning and I think that is worth celebrating."
When the twins were little, Christmas was their favorite holiday. They got presents, no school, good food and they could hang out with one another. As a toddler, Sara was so intrigued with the colors and lights, she just had to tug at the tree, shattering a few ornaments. As a young kid, Tegan threw up on the toy that their parents had given them. They just loved Christmas and everything related to it; Tegan just wanted to remember how much she loved it, and wanted to remember it with her sister.
Sara turned to the tree, carefully placing the lights on the branches in front of her. She didn't say anything else to Tegan for the few minutes that it took her to do the task, but she knew that her sister was simply expressing her feelings. And truthfully, she was glad she could wake up next to her sister. Each day, she focused more on the reasons to be happy with her sister, rather than the reasons to be miserable without her. The list so far included…
Tegan's raspy morning voice, the wrinkles by her eyes when she smiled, the face of concentration she would make when reading a good book or trying to write a song. It also included, but was not limited to, the way Tegan would blush when she was simply trying to speak about her feelings, the way that Tegan would make her feel like no one else mattered, like she was invincible even though they were only 5'2. It also had Tegan's high-pitched laugh, her strong hands, the look full of adoration and innocent love she only gave Sara.
Sara could focus on the positives. Because the list for the positives were so good, so beautiful and so amazing, that the list of negatives almost didn't matter anymore. Almost.
After hanging the lights, Sara turned around to find Tegan busy on her phone again, her tongue poking at the corner of her mouth. It took her one more second to realize that Tegan was filming her the entire time. Well, more like filming her backside.
"That better not go on social media!" She practically growled. She was quick tempered, nowadays, and the fact that Tegan wasn't helping her was annoying her. Yes, she remembered the positives list, but Tegan was still her sister, which mean she could annoy her like no one else could. Mickey appeared out of nowhere and got a hold of the tinsel on the floor of the living room.
"It's not! This one is just for me," Tegan smirked. A moment's hesitation passed and then she added, "your ass looks too good for me to share it on social media." It did. Sara's black pants hugged all the right curves and her striped shirt rested right above her ass, giving Tegan a splendid view of her plump behind. The comment made Sara's mouth dry and she felt an all too familiar heat spread through her body. Before she could do anything about it, she needed to talk with Tegan about something.
"Tee," Sara started. She blushed and took a breath, knowing her sister's eyes were on her. She walked to her worn down leather sofa, her eyes pleading Tegan to sit down with her. It seemed as though twin telepathy worked, because her sister sat on one corner of the couch, her knees to her chest and Sara sat down at the other. Her elbows rested on her knees, her hands nervously tugging at one another. She cleared her throat. "Let's talk about sex."
The oldest of the two was not expecting this conversation so suddenly and out of nowhere and her cheeks reddened, but she would talk about it. It wasn't like Sara to bring these things up. Tegan was usually the one that wanted to fuck and be fucked and she was not shy about it, as Sara heard this morning in the shower. With a tender voice, she asked ,"okay, Sara. What's going on?"
With a deep breath, Sara spilled the beans. "No one's topped me since you last did." She couldn't look at her sister and Tegan wasn't totally sure if she heard that right. Sara? Womanizer Sara, leading ladies to the bedroom Sara, single Sara from 2009-2011, hasn't been topped since 1998? How? And why? Tegan was in a bit of a shock, but she was in for another one soon enough.
She sputtered noises before she could speak. "W-wha-h-how- what?"
Sara sighed now, feeling embarrassed and shy. Her confidence was gone and quickly replaced with doubts. However, she needed to have this talk with Tegan before they could be intimate again. It was a personal requirement so that she could let those last walls down- her therapist told her it needed to happen.
"I honestly didn't feel like I could let anyone else touch me. A part of me felt... disgusted with the fact that we had done what we did and I thought that if anyone else knew, they would be disgusted as well. And then when the gross feeling left, it was replaced with sadness and heartache because I had pushed you away. I didn't want to let anyone else touch me because I… I wanted my body to remember your touch. I didn't want to replace it with someone else. I couldn't replace you." By now, Sara had let out a few emotional tears slip and her face was flushed with embarrassment and shame.
Tegan took a moment to process what Sara had told her and took a deep breath. She sat next to her lover and softly placed a hand on her sister's upper back, rubbing away the feeling of shame. She gave her sister a few minutes to breathe out the pain she had shown Tegan, and to close herself up again. She didn't need to go there anymore.
"So, in 20 years, no one has gone down on you or gone inside of you in any way…?" Back to the original topic. Sara blushed at Tegan's lewd words, almost regretting bringing it up when she heard the subtle amusement in her sister's voice when she spoke.
"Besides a yearly trip to the gyno, no."
"What about masturbation?"
Good lord. "I would sometimes use a finger but I mainly stayed on my clit."
"Not even… Emy?" Emy had been a topic they hadn't talked much about since Tegan's trip to visits their friend. Sara had called her ex-wife on the phone after the fiasco was over, just for fun.
Sara cleared her throat, needing a tall glass of ice water. "Truthfully, Emy wanted to touch me. So, I would let her fuck me in the ass. With her tongue, fingers or strap. I told her I wasn't comfortable with vaginal penetration but that I liked it in the ass."
That was the second shock. Her little sister liked bum sex.
"And did you? Like it, I mean. Because I remember you liking it." How was she forming words? Why couldn't she try to sugarcoat her words?
Sara giggled, embarrassed. "I did. I still do. I just thought that I needed to keep that part of my body untouched."
Sara heard her sister smirk. "But you'd let me touch you, right?" Her voice was so close to her ear. It send shivers throughout her body. Soon enough, Tegan was sucking at her earlobe and making her wet. She tried to answer her sister but only a moan came out. She gently pushed her sister away and smiled brightly at her.
"Come smoke with me."
So she did. Sara went into her office space, unlocked the safe and gathered all her precious tools; their bong, her favorite lighter and some of California's best OG Kush. Tegan got her grinder and a water bottle. Giggling like teens, they opened up the patio door and prepared what they needed. The oldest of the two ground up the weed in the metal grinder and Sara poured water into the bong, making sure not to go past the choker line. It was almost dark outside when Tegan handed her lover the grinder, and watched as Sara expertly packed the bowl piece.
Sara handed her the lighter and then the bong, and so Tegan lit up first. The weed burned bright orange and the bong became full of thick, cloudy smoke. Tegan, like a pro, inhaled and pulled the bowl out, making sure to clear the bong. Sara took it from her hands and while looking at Tegan, burned the weed and inhaled deep. Her pouty lips were red.
"Sara, come on, we don't have a lot of time." Tegan smirked at her blonde sister. Sara had gotten a haircut and Tegan had never felt so attracted to anyone in her 17 years of life before. Sara was hot. Sara was climbing over her lap and had no shirt. Quickly, Sara had no bra on, either. Tegan wrapped her lips around Sara's nipples and bit, feeling her sister grind down on her lap.
She felt weightless. Was she nude? She couldn't remember. She just felt her clit wanting to explode and Sara's body weight on top of her. God, Sara was hot. She loved Sara. She adored her. Was she Sara? Was Sara Tegan? Sara. Sara. Sara. Sara.
She leaned back and pulled her sister with her, knocking the bong over and spilling the water but she didn't care because Sara's hand was palming her through her panties and Sara was moaning and so was she and then she was coming, violently and loudly.
"I love you, Sara." A cough. The wrinkles by her eyes appeared. Her smile was blinding, her cheeks here blushing. Her eyes were glossy.
"I love you too, Tegan. Can we make out?" She was high and needed to kiss her.
Tegan smiled happily, her lips eager to touch the ones in front of her. She was so happy. Eagerly, she grabbed her sister's hand and lead them inside, forgetting all about the bong and weed. She closed the door behind them and quickly turned around, holding her sister's hips and pulled her so that their fronts were touching.
Sara's lips trembled, their breathing hot and hearts pounding heavy. She saw her sister's identical face in front of her and wanted to see it everyday after. "I would marry you if I could." She didn't mean to say that out loud but she did; she was too high to care. Tegan closed the distance between them and kissed her lover, hard. The youngest of the two moaned in surprise, kissing Tegan back just as passionately. She wrapped her arms around the strong, wide shoulders so that she would fall. Her body was heavy and light, all at once. Kissing Tegan would never be enough.
"And I would say yes, if I could."