OKAY PEOPLE, THIS IS A SUPER LONG CHAPTER. It's so long but it's filled with hopefully some answers... because Ray finally decides to spill some beans. Also a lot of flashbacks.
I wanna put some warnings on this chapter since it's... a bit of a ride. If you've been reading you know the Primo got destroyed, Titans died, and since this is a flashback episode... you can probably see why some warnings are here.
As always, any kind of feedback is appreciated! I'd love to know what people think of this... uh... little revelation. So, grab some snack and a drink because this is a long one and enjoy! 3
The quartet felt a melancholic aura when they stepped into Bright's empty home. Silently, they undid their transformations. Morgan turned on the lights as Hanan rushed around to close the curtains to get a couple of paparazzi and fans off their back.
Ray, on the other hand, hadn't even protested when Terra had picked them up and carried them back to their home and sat them down on the couch. She had managed to get them to let go of the bag with the mug, but the book was still firmly in their hands.
It was like Ray was gone from the world. Their body was still there but they seemed to be in such a confused daze while they held the book in an iron grip in their hands. Their breathing was slow and soft and their eyes stared at nothing.
"What do we do now...?" Beryl asked, turning to Hanan. She hoped the brunette would have the answer. She always did.
"I... I don't know..."
Connie was pacing around the room, fumbling with her bracelet and trying to regulate her breathing.
"This is not... happening... oh... oh god..." She whispered to herself, on the verge of tears again.
Hanan grabbed her arm to make her stop. "It's okay, Connie." She reassured her with a firm tone. "We will fix this. We'll get him back."
"But Bright...! He's..." Connie didn't seem reassured as she took a breath, or tried to. "He's...! If anyone should have been taken away, it should have been me...! Not him... not Bright..." She buried her face into Hanan's chest, who tried to console her by rubbing her back gently.
With her back against the wall, Morgan hid her hands in her pockets as she watched Hanan's attempt to console a crying Connie, and then shifted her gaze to Beryl trying to get some reaction from a dulled Ray.
"Ray...? Raaaayyyyyy?" Beryl asked softly, kneeling in front of the blond. "Please answer..." Reluctantly, she shook their shoulders. "We need your help..."
"They're... still alive, right?" Hanan asked, biting her lip. She knew it was a weird question to ask, but Ray was not human. They had already died a few times and always came back like nothing had happened. It was something that they treated as normal.
Ray's entire being confused her.
Beryl placed a hand on their chest, feeling a soft yet rhythmic beating. She gave Hanan a confirming nod.
"Hey, you dumb flashlight!" Morgan called, not moving from her spot. "Say something!"
Fumbling with her fingers in thought, Beryl got an idea. She raised both of her hands and slapped them against Ray's cheeks.
"Ahh!"
Ray almost dropped the book in their hands and let out a whine as they rubbed their red, swollen cheeks. Beryl gasped at the sight. She hadn't even hit that hard...
For a second, Ray seemed confused. They looked around, eyes shifting around the room and to everyone in it. "What is...?"
Everything came back in a rush.
Their face turned from a wide-eyed glance to a hateful scowl as they stood up and threw the book on the ground. Their body glowed intensely as they started to shout and scream, like a child throwing a temper tantrum. They didn't even stop to catch a breath.
"Ray!? Please!" Beryl called out, reaching for them. "You're going to hurt yourse-"
Their eyes lit up with rage. "I hate him... I hate him... so much... yet why... does that hatred not go through!?" They sobbed, burying their face in their hands. "Lucille... what should I do...?"
"Enough!"
The room shook heavily, making Ray fall over. Beryl's breathing was jagged as she straightened her back again. "I'm done with being in the dark." She said with a firm voice, standing over Ray's fallen form. "You have to tell us. About us, about you... everything."
"Why did the Titans destroy Primo...?" Hanan asked the lingering question that she still hadn't gotten answers for. "Why did... we ruin something that was ours?"
Ray lowered their head. After a couple of minutes, they finally spoke again.
"... You are right. You deserve the truth."
"We sure do." Morgan hissed, coming closer. "Huh, so what happened to the 'I don't remember' part?"
Hanan gave her a dark look before turning back to Ray. "It's okay, Ray." She said gently. "We will hear you out. Start from the beginning and tell us what you know. We will listen all the way through. Promise."
"You did not listen back then... nor did you understand." They whispered. "Nobody does, and nobody ever will."
Beryl leaned forward, expression serious. "We will try! We are not like the other us!" She told them, clenching her fists. "We may not understand but... we will accept. You're our friend and your feelings are important."
They saw a brief flash of Lucille's smile.
The others nodded in agreement as they gathered around them. Hanan, at Ray's request, lit up the fireplace with a warm fire.
"This tale will take a while." Ray said, picking up the book again. For a moment, they stared at one of the dark corners of the room, as if anything could jump out of it any second. Nothing happened though, and they sat down.
With a brief flash of light, the Eternal Lantern rose out of Ray's chest. They seemed a tad confused at first but after a moment they grabbed it. The room started warping and twisting, bearing an illusion in the form of a couple of windows made of stained glass to accompany Ray's tale, projecting their memories.
The first window floated up, depicting an image of a different looking Ray. Their hair was longer, with two braids in front while the rest was loose behind them. They wore a pink and white dress, golden jewelry, and pink roses adorned their hair.
Ray looked they were a princess straight out of a storybook.
When Ray started speaking, the window lit up and the image began moving.
Episode 19: Primordial Tale ~Daybreak~
Radiant Lumiere's first memory was her smile.
Why was she born? Why was she here?
Once she was nothing, and suddenly she was. It was as simple as that.
Her smile brought her here. She brought her to this world.
Mother.
Her smile. Her acceptance.
Nothing else mattered.
The window showed a woman eerily resembling the Ray from the past. She was tall and beautiful, with the same hair color, same eyes, and a similar dress. The only major difference was the woman was taller and older.
"Mother..."
The four girls watched the window with varying emotions. Confusion, anticipation, wonder, worry...
"Dance recitals... writing... reading... performing blessings..." Ray closed their eyes as the windows showed exactly what Ray was talking about. "That is what eternity looked like for me. That was what my life was... still, unchanging... yet... everything around me changed." They clenched their fists. "Everything... except me."
The Ray in the window had her hands clasped in a prayer, unmoving while the background shifted. Day to night, dusk to dawn, again, and again...
"But then... Lucille." They spoke as a peahen with a soft-brown body appeared, tail-feathers, while not as majestic as her son's, were dyed in rainbow colors as well. "She was Bright's mother." They added quickly, feeling their chest tighten. "She taught me so much and took me outside the kingdom for the first time. It was behind my mother's back... curiosity won the battle... and Lucille just made it feel like it was all right. I promised myself that it would be a one time thing."
Fireflies surrounded the Ray in the window.
"It was not."
Radiant Lumiere admired the fireflies with glowing eyes. They fluttered their shining bodies around the blonde's equally lit up form. She made some playful turns, dancing along the lightning bugs.
This was a lovely place to be.
"Who... is there?" A voice spoke up, making her stop. "Who are you?"
Surprised, Radiant Lumiere snapped her head around to find the owner of the voice. She couldn't see anyone, and it wasn't even that dark.
"Ugh, why do you shine like that?" Just out of light's reach, a boy stepped out of the shadows. "I get Lumo people being all gold and shiny but this is... ridiculous and... and..." He trailed off as they took a good look at Radiant Lumiere.
Time stood still. Neither of them spoke. Neither of them even breathed.
Both felt it.
That feeling. Something they had never felt before. Something they couldn't explain. Something they couldn't understand.
It was unfamiliar, strange, scary...
But it felt right.
"It was not a coincidence that we met. It was destiny... decided long ago."
Everyone's faces became blurry and the sound drowned out. They saw Morgan move and Hanan holding onto her. Connie hid behind Beryl, who yelled something in her loud voice, but Ray couldn't make out any words, just noises.
In the haze, their own voice was the clearest.
"After that encounter I finally realised that..." Ray paused, rethinking their words. "I understood a certain feeling that had haunted me for so long."
They kept silent an entire minute, as if they couldn't get themself to say the word.
"Loneliness."
Black eyes! Black eyes!
A sign of darkness!
Radiant Lumiere took a few steps back, almost tripping over her dress and cloak.
"Easy there, princess. Wouldn't want your fancy dress to get dirty, right?" The boy laughed as he watched her grab onto a wayward branch to keep standing. "So, tell me, why am I being 'blessed' by your oh-so glorious presence? You don't seem like someone who visits the mainland much..."
She narrowed her eyes in confusion. "I am sorry but I do not remember allowing you in this place. I have claimed it as-"
"Uh, no? I was here first?" The boy interrupted her, crossing his arms. "I've been coming for like... uh..." He paused and rolled his eyes. "Like at least three hundred years, sooooo..."
"Three hundred?"
The boy nodded as he leaned against the tree. "At least. If you're as old and immortal as I am then... years and events start to blend sometime, you know?" A shrug. "Time becomes meaningless and hollow."
Radiant Lumiere's eyes widened at that. He had said her exact feelings out loud.
"I understand." Her words made the boy look up in surprise, if not outright shock. "Everything and everyone changes... yet I am still the same... idle... unmoving..." She bit her lip. "Stuck."
The boy's dark eyes showed pity, empathy. "That's exactly how it feels like... guess we can relate on that." His laugh was a tad gloomy. "Hey, you know what? Why don't you stay here for a bit? I'd love to chat a little. I mostly come here to relax but... I'll admit it sometimes gets a little boring."
Radiant Lumiere hesitated and he saw it.
"Can I bribe you with some of that nice fruit?" He suggested, pointing at some bright yellow-colored fruit hanging in a tree above them. "I bet they don't have these in Lumo. They only grow here on the mainland, and they're really rare."
He was already in the tree before she could reply. His form disappeared behind a patch of leaves before he came back with two of the fruit in his hand, handing one to Radiant Lumiere while taking a big bite of the other one. He sat down with his back against the tree.
"I have no cutlery..." Radiant Lumiere commented, inspecting the odd, pointy fruit in her hands. "Have you never learned manners?" She scrunched up her nose, seeming slightly disgusted at the boy's eating habits.
"Hahahaha! Oh, please. Aren't you also like three hundred years old? So who cares about manners at this point?"
The way he said it made it feel like he was right.
"But I guess it would at least be nice enough to introduce myself... I don't wanna be known as 'that random boy with awesome and cool hair'. I'm a bit more special than that." Swallowing the last pieces of the fruit, he stood up, spreading his arms as wide as he could while wearing a grin full of pride.
"I am Shade, the Prince of Darkness!"
"What!?"
"No way!"
"Uhm..."
"What the hell!?"
Morgan's voice tore through the haziness. She kicked the glass window, making it shatter in many, colorful pieces. It faded away instantly. Ray winced in pain, gritting their teeth.
"We said we would hear them out!" Beryl yelled as she grabbed Morgan by the shoulders. The shorter girl winced in Beryl's grip but didn't protest. She clicked her tongue, bit back some unpleasant words, and sat back down.
Ray closed their eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing. "We talked a little before Lucille found us. She did not seem angry, on the contrary... she was happy." A smile found its way on their face as they continued. "And so was I..."
A new window came in the other's place. The scene shifted into a grand, pure white hallway. Ray didn't realise another smile crossing their lips as they watched a depiction of their previous self dance through the halls.
Radiant Lumiere pranced around the grand hallway, humming a little tune under her breath. Sometimes she made a little hop, lifting her dress slightly as she did so, followed by a small giggle.
His eyes. His eyes!
Filled with a darkness they had never seen before. So mysterious, intriguing and uncanny...
... and yet, she couldn't get them off her mind.
"You seem cheerful today..." A woman's voice said with a giggle of her own, making Radiant Lumiere stop and turn around to find a soft-brown peahen in front of her.
Excited, Radiant Lumiere ran up to her. "Lucille!" She smiled with white-colored cheeks. "When can we go back to the mainland?"
"Oh, hush, hush." Lucille whispered, glancing around the hall for any possible eavesdroppers. "If word of you going outside to the mainland got to your mother..." She paused, ruffling her feathers nervously. "Let alone if she found out that you made a certain friend..."
Those words created a certain sense of dread in Radiant Lumiere. Her eyes widened as her hands went to her mouth.
Mother's smile. Mother's acceptance.
Those were the only things that mattered.
"You are right... Mother... will..." A small gasp. "I should not be near darkness... it will taint me... what am I doing!?" She looked at her hands, as if the answer would be written there. "Then why... do I want to go back? Why do I want to see him again? Why am I having these corrupted thoughts...?" Another, louder gasp. "Am I being corrupted right now!?"
Lucille extended a wing, touching Radiant Lumiere's dress. "There is nothing wrong with that. You are overthinking this. It's normal to want to spend time with friends." She reassured her firmly.
It did calm Radiant Lumiere down slightly, but the worry remained. That feeling... that energy Shade emitted... so unfamiliar... but familiar, somehow... yet... they longed for it.
"You know, I'm glad you finally were able to meet him." Lucille admitted with a relieved sigh. "I've walked into him a couple of times. He always seems so lonely..."
Radiant Lumiere blinked slowly and played with one of her front braids. She let out a squeak as another woman strolled down the hall. Wearing a dress that was almost an exact copy of her daughter's, Lumina stood tall and upright. She was a presence that demanded respect.
"Lucille Harmonia- Ah, no. Lucille Proxima Angelica... no... oh, Lucille." Being unable to remember the peahen's full name vexed Lumina a lot, but she didn't drop her serious composure for even a second. "Why are you here in that... distasteful form?"
"My... ahem, distasteful form only serves to make Lady Radiant Lumiere's beauty even more noticeable in comparison." Lucille replied simply, not fazed by Lumina's tone in the slightest.
Lumina raised her chin. "My daughter's beauty shines on its own. That is a fact. We do not need yours, or anyone's, help for that."
Gently but firmly, Lumina placed her hands on Radiant Lumiere's shoulders, pulling her daughter close as her entire composure changed from stern and cold to warm and tender.
"Come now, my daughter. It is time to rehearse for the upcoming recital." She led her away from Lucille. "We want it to be absolutely perfect, do we not?"
Silent tears were shed when their mother had come into view. She was so imposing and powerful.
"I betrayed my mother's trust. I went out to that place more and more. She never suspected... anything." They leaked out their stray feelings, accompanied by more tears. "It was that feeling... it made me do things... stupid things, mistakes..."
Getting these feelings off their chest felt... nice? They knew they should stop, but it also didn't matter anymore.
"I did not know they were mistakes... no, no... I did. I did know. I knew what I was doing was bad... but Lucille, she kept saying those feelings, actions, and thoughts were okay." They squeezed their eyes shut tightly. "I believed her."
None of the girls seemed to know what to say. They stayed silent to allow Ray to continue letting out those piled up, confused feelings and emotions that had plagued them for so long.
She hugged her knees as she heard a woman's booming, echoing, angry screams.
It was so close.
"Lady Ignis..."
Ignis wouldn't come here, right? If she found out that Radiant Lumiere had left the castle...
Balance had to be kept. She had to stay in Lumo.
Another yell followed. This one sounded higher, scared.
Radiant Lumiere didn't have time to start pondering what-ifs as Shade trotted in, holding two sticks with some sort of meat attached to it. He was completely out of breath and his clothes were tattered, torn, and... burnt? Other than the clothes, he seemed completely fine.
"Hahaha, thanks for the food, bitches." He laughed to himself, gathering his breath before taking a bite from the piece of meat. His face turned into surprise when he looked up and noticed Radiant Lumiere. "Oh... uh, hey. Didn't expect you to be here. What's up, princess?"
With a gasp, she stood up. "What happened to you!? Your clothes! And I heard Lady Ignis and Lady Terre and-"
"Pff... they're just pissed I stole some of Terre's food, and then..." He snickered to himself. "I cooked it on Ignis. She makes for the best grill!"
"What!?" Again, Radiant Lumiere's hands flew to her mouth in horror. "How could you do that? How did you... not dim?"
Shade gave her an odd look. "Oh, I flickered like... what, fourteen times?" He took another bite, not even bothering to swallow the food before continuing. "Some flickers can't bring me down."
"Flickers?"
"Flickering... that is how I found out what it was. He had flickered a lot. It got me wondering... he was someone of pure darkness... and I was someone of pure light... we are... similar." A breath. "To confirm... I..."
Another glass window floated up, showing Radiant Lumiere standing on a balcony. Her long, golden hair was blowing in the wind as she slowly let herself fall off it, out of view.
Connie looked away and covered her ears, as if she anticipated a loud crack. No sound came as the scene changed again, iridescent glass changing color to show a different image of Radiant Lumiere lying in a flowerbed soaked in white blood.
She was smiling.
"I was happy." Ray admitted, keeping their stare. "I never knew someone like me existed up until that point..."
Hanan took in a deep breath as a couple of windows startled circling around them. "I can't believe this..." She whispered, not entirely sure how to take this all in. "You were friends..."
Ray shrunk back slightly, then nodded. "A long time went by, years, decades... maybe even a century... and we just met up at that place every once in a while." They heard Morgan scoff but ignored it. "We just... talked, counted fireflies, told stories and worries... simple things." The windows depicted exactly what Ray was talking about. Radiant Lumiere and Shade sat against a tree, talking, smiling. "But those simple things became what I looked forward to the most. It felt so peaceful, so... so... right."
They rubbed their right hand.
"Later, we got visitors from another world. Mother was not pleased." Another window showed said visitors, three knights, bowing politely in front of two thrones, housing Lumina on one and Radiant Lumiere on the other.
"Visitors? Another world?" Hanan spoke up, furrowing her eyebrows at seeing the three knights. "Who are they!?
"That is of no importance." Ray concluded softly, lowering their head with a sorrowful look. "They gave us gifts, and one of those gifts was..." They placed a hand on the book on their lap. "This."
One window rose up, lighting up as it depicted Lucille again, in human form this time.
"So... Lucille came up with an idea."
"An... exchange diary?" Radiant Lumiere stopped practicing her signature on a scroll. "Can people from Obscuro write?"
"Of course they can, silly." Lucille giggled, holding a leatherbound book in her hands. "Most Obscuro people I've met are quite smart. Did you know that they have this sort of exchange system with Lumo people?" Her smile widened as Radiant Lumiere shook her head, astonished at the revelation. "It's mostly herbs and flowers, some grow better in the light, while others flourish in the dark. Some also trade jewelries, like this!" She showed Ray one of the amethyst rings she was wearing. "I got this from a really nice lady a while ago."
Radiant Lumiere set her quill aside, leaning forward as Lucille continued speaking.
"She was so young, yet such a strong knight." The woman let out a dreamy sigh. "Just like my wonderful, beautiful husband!" She raised her hands and made a confident pose. "He shines with the true, brilliant radiance of the Von Everglow family!"
Radiant Lumiere found herself giggling as Lucille continued. She remembered Lucille's husband saying the exact same, with the same poses as well. If she could remember correctly, every Von Everglow she had met had left quite an impact with their... extravagant attitude and looks.
"Lucille... um..." She folded her hands over each other with a wry smile. Lucille was broken out of her daydreaming after Radiant Lumiere cleared her throat with a small cough.
"Oh. Ahem. What I was trying to say was... I think unity of light and darkness is wonderful." Lucille continued, looking at one of the glass windows depicting the four Titans. "This friendship, between the purest of both, could be a chance to unite everyone and have the Titans see that their notion of balance and harmony is wrong." She closed her eyes. "Fake, even."
With a smile, Lucille placed the book on Radiant Lumiere's table. It was one of the gifts the three visitors had given to her a couple of days before.
"I can act as a messenger. You write a message inside the book and I take the book to bring it to him, then he can write a reply, and I bring it back to you. Rinse, and repeat~!"
Glowing eyes scanned the leatherbound book.
"That is a wonderful idea..." Radiant Lumiere smiled brightly, picking up the quill again.
"So that is why... Shade had it...?" Connie's voice was barely a whisper as the four girls watched the windows depict various images of Radiant Lumiere writing in the book, and Lucille taking it with her. There was a brief picture of Radiant Lumiere reading what was written inside it with an untamed smile, which morphed into another memory of Shade and her sitting in their secret place again.
Beryl wore a sad smile. "... Like a long distance friendship."
Nodding, Ray watched in complete silence how the four girls took in all the memories playing out on the windows.
Hanan almost didn't want to ask the underlying question, the itching curiosity, the elephant in the room... but she had to know. They all had to know.
"What went wrong?"
The mood turned from uncomfortable to uncomfortably tense instantly.
"Every time I was not there, not with him... I felt sad, empty, broken." Ray breathed, composure cracking slightly. They lowered their head. "Never once... did I touch his hand. I wanted it... I felt this... yearning for it."
A window showed Lumina pulling Radiant Lumiere close, gently stroking a hand through the girl's golden locks. "Mother's embrace was the only physical contact I had." Radiant Lumiere looked somber in her mother's sheltered hold. "It was not enough."
It was like their heart was caught in their throat.
"... I allowed myself to become tainted."
Their breathing grew heavy and they couldn't get themself to continue, so they let the windows talk in their stead.
"Please, hold my hand."
Radiant Lumiere leaned forward, holding up her right hand in front of Shade.
"Huh? Uh... what happened to becoming 'tainted'?" He asked, puzzled by her sudden firmness. Nonetheless, he held up his left hand. "Doesn't... uh... like... Lumo need you...?"
She shook her head, eyes glimmering with tears. "... But do they care about what
I need? I need you!"
Taken back by her declaration, Shade chuckled meekly. He reached out his throbbing left hand and wrapped his fingers around Radiant Lumiere's.
As soon as their palms touched, a light appeared over them, taking an oddly humanoid shape. On the ground, their entwined shadow took the same form, if only for a moment.
All at once, everything changed. Their minds went to place far away from reality. The lights emitting from the fireflies almost seemed to intensify.
Radiant Lumiere squeezed Shade's hand. They both smiled despite feeling an unfamiliar energy slither through their hands.
This is where they were meant to be.
"Look at you being a rebel...! So, what was scary about this again?" Shade's playful laughter slowly died out as his eyes met Radiant Lumiere's. They were so close to each other, they might as well have rested their foreheads together.
Their hands were still linked even if they retreated their heads somewhat.
"Your smile is so radiant." A soft laugh. "How fitting, right?"
Radiant Lumiere was rendered speechless. She felt like her chest was going to burst.
"Please... do not leave... I do not want to be alone again..."
In a strange sense of irony that was the exact moment Lucille stepped into the scene, startling the two and causing them to let go.
"Oh..." Beryl trailed off once she saw Lucille. The woman's surprised look turn into a smile of delight.
"... Lucille has always been supportive." Ray told her, watching the scene play out in the window. Lucille giggled and said something that made both their old self and Shade flustered.
Seeing their memories laid bare for all to see felt weird. They felt an emotion they couldn't pin down. It wasn't a nice emotion.
They didn't want to look up. They didn't want to face the others.
"When we touched hands... even though it was scary, in here..." They placed a hand on their chest. "Here, it felt good. Because I felt closer to him. It was like we were connected and... and... complete."
They remembered that feeling so vividly.
"Even if only for a moment."
They had felt so lonely, and then... they had felt Shade's loneliness too.
It was a loneliness was shared by two.
"But that moment was not enough."
The ballroom was gigantic, overwhelming and filled with well-dressed people. A floor was stretching out seemingly eternally. White pillars upheld a balcony above, which housed a few seats and tables with various appetizers. Lumina sat on one of the seats, uptight and serious. Her face didn't reveal a single emotion.
Radiant Lumiere adjusted her white robes before walking forward to stand in the middle of the room. Every person in the room stepped aside to give her the center stage.
Taking a deep breath, Radiant Lumiere bowed forward slightly. She felt all the eyes focusing on her.
"Ah, she looks absolutely stunning." One of the knights said, who stood close enough near her to hear. "Her glowing, majestic beauty is a wonder to behold."
"You should ask for her hand..." Another knight replied with a laugh. "Who knows! Maybe you'll be the lucky one!"
A scoff. "Are you a fool? I don't want to get banished."
I hate this.
From her other side, she could hear a woman gossip. "Lady Radiant Lumiere doesn't really look all that well."
"Maybe her mother made her overwork herself again?" Another woman's voice said. "Wouldn't be the first time."
I hate this.
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Lucille's son, Bright, watching her intently. His eyes shimmered with the same kind of comforting encouragement as his mother.
Behind her, the orchestra started playing their musical score.
That was her cue to start.
She took one step, followed by another step. Just like practice.
I hate this.
A solemn expression lingered on her face as she let the music guide her body.
I hate this. I hate this.
She wasn't sure what was happening, but each step felt like it was draining all life out of her.
I am lonely.
She misstepped and toppled to the floor.
The music stopped and she heard a couple of gasps. Slowly, she got back up and raised her head. Every person's face was a blur except one.
Her eyes met her mother's. She knew that look.
Disappointment.
Radiant Lumiere's heart sped up, as did her breathing as she tried to continue her dance as if nothing had happened.
I hate this.
I hate this.
I hate this.
Everyone faded out, and a single silhouette of a person popped up. Her mind must be playing tricks on her.
I am so lonely.
The illusionary Shade gave her an easy-going grin. It was a grin that was free of worries, free of sorrow.
She couldn't stop.
She. Couldn't. Stop. Thinking. About. Him.
With her mouth open in a silent scream, she outstretched her right hand towards him.
Her hand turned black and everything around her shattered.
A scream echoed through the room and all light was sucked up by her glowing form. Some people fell on their knees, their own bodies darkened.
Radiant Lumiere herself had collapsed on the ground. The sight briefly shifted to one in a dark room and a man she had never seen before standing over her, worried and panicking.
Darkness took her.
They couldn't bring themself to continue at the moment.
"For real? You were obsessed with a boy?" Morgan sighed deeply, still leaning against the wall. "And not just any boy, no... a damn cockroach!" She spat, glaring at the blond and giving the wall a slight kick. She needed to kick something and had to hold back to not make that 'something' Ray's face.
Ray raised their hands to their cheeks as hot tears streamed down their face. "Feelings… are complicated. He made me happy... I was so happy!" They cried out. "But that was not allowed. I was not allowed to have anything. I was not allowed to feel anything...!"
Concerned, Hanan looked from Ray to Beryl and Connie, who were holding onto each other as they had listened, and watched, the tale with matching tense looks.
"Why... was I not allowed to have my happiness!?" Ray buried their face into their hands, sobbing. "Why!?"
As the blond was crying another window floated up next to them.
Radiant Lumiere awoke from a sleepless dream in her own bed. A soft hand caressed her face gently with slow movements.
"... Mo... Mother...?"
The woman sat by her bed. "My daughter, I am so relieved you have awoken." She spoke calmly and folded her hands on her lap. "But you will have to explain yourself." Her expression turned cold, making Radiant Lumiere flinch.
"Wha... what do you me-?"
"Your hand."
Her eyes glided to her hand... her throbbing hand. It was covered in white bandages, tightly wrapped around her hand up to her wrist.
"Radiant Lumiere." Her mother's voice brought her attention back to her. "What is the cause of this? Did you touch someone?" She narrowed her eyes. "You went outside the castle without me, did you not?"
The girl kept silent and averted her gaze from her mother's eyes. She clutched the sheets of her bed with shaking hands.
Mother's smile. Mother's acceptance...
"So it is true." Mother concluded, voice soft. Radiant Lumiere's breathing sped up. Mother would find out. She would find out. She could see right through Radiant Lumiere's words. She could pick every small word or mannerism apart and find out the truth behind them. Mother knew... everything...
"Look at me while I am talking to you." Once again, her mother's voice brought her attention back. "For more than five hundred years... I have taken care of you. I have protected you. I did all I could and sacrificed so much to make sure you were safe." Every word she said felt like a punch. "And this is how you repay those efforts and sacrifices? You disregard my words, and allow yourself to become tainted."
That last word felt like a stab to the chest.
"What did I do wrong? How else can I protect you?"
Radiant Lumiere's hand started throbbing again. For a moment she could have sworn she felt a hand on her shoulder, making her flinch.
"Was my love not enough, my daughter? Was I to-?"
"No!" She cried out, only realising it was a lie after the words had come out. "It is not like tha-!"
Mother's expression tensed up. "Do not interrupt me while I am talking, Radiant Lumiere."
"I am sorry, mother..."
Two hands cupped Radiant Lumiere's cheeks. "My daughter, I am your friend. I am your only friend." She spoke, voice soft yet clear. "Everyone else is only going to leave you in the end. They do not care about you. They care about your status." A brief pause. "You are special."
"I know... mother..." Radiant Lumiere whispered, each word forced out more tears. "I am so... tired... I am sorry... I..."
"Hush." Her mother silenced her by wiping the tears. "Rest and clear your head. I will be back tomorrow."
Mother let go of her and stood up. She was so tall. Her figure slid towards the door, turning around one last time to look at her daughter.
"You are to stay in this room until you have written down precisely what caused this to happen, and who is responsible for tainting you. Write down their name, or names, and I will see to it that they are appropriately punished." She placed her hand on the table, right next to the book. "Are we understood, my daughter?"
The girls shook, and slowly nodded.
"Yes mother."
"What a bitch." Morgan hissed, staring at the picture of Lumina in the window with an almost disgusted look. "Sucks you got stuck with her." Her expression showed a hint of pity.
Hanan glared at her. "Morgan!"
To her surprise, Ray didn't reply. They were still sobbing, shoulders shaking. Nobody dared to approach them.
The Ray from the past, depicted in the window, was also sobbing as she threw herself on the table. Her hands held the book tightly.
In the middle of the night, Radiant Lumiere still hadn't caught sleep. Still, she was laying with her head on the table. Her tears should have dried out after who knows how many hours.
She didn't have time to think as she heard the door open.
Her heart skipped a beat. Fearfully, she turned around to find not her mother but Lucille who had come in. She closed the door behind her.
"Your mother suspects me of taking you out of the castle." Lucille said quietly, slowly approaching them. "I didn't tell her anything."
Radiant Lumiere looked up at the woman. "Lucille... what... what shall I... do?" Shaking hands were raised to her face. "Mother... she is furious. What is she... going to do? To me? To him? What is going to happen if I tell her everything...?" She suddenly held her breath, eyes widening even further. "... A war."
"You don't have to tell her anything if you don't want to." Lucille leaned forward, smiling at the girl. "It's your life. It's your choice."
Right... Lucille was right... she was right...
"When you go somewhere and it turns out not to be the right place, you can always go somewhere else." Lucille continued. "But if you're running away, nowhere is ever the right place."
"I have a place I want to be." Radiant Lumiere smiled, both hand and heart throbbing.
Lucille laced her fingers together as a serious expression lingered on her face. "I think... the two of you are able to free Primo from the Titans' tyranny." Her look turned into one of sorrow. "We have suffered too many losses because of them, don't you agree?"
Radiant Lumiere looked at Lucille, eyes wide. The woman nodded with an encouraging smile.
"I believe in you, Radiant Lumiere."
Radiant Lumiere smiled back as she stood up. Her body started glowing. "Thank you, Lucille." She looked at her bandaged hand. "This life... is mine." Gritting her teeth, she ripped the bandages off her hand, exposing it being stained in black.
She scrambled to pick up the book, holding it tightly against her chest. "We will meet again soon, Lucille." Her features softened as her glow lit up a bit more. "Until then, I will carry you in my heart."
Lucille looked at her without a word, but her face said enough.
Grinning, Radiant Lumiere turned around and walked up to the balcony. The darkness on her hand grew. Taking in one final deep breath, she said goodbye to the place she had called home her entire life.
Mother's smile. Mother's acceptance.
None of those mattered anymore.
Letting go of all her worries, all her responsibilities, all her fear, her anger, her misery, loneliness... she let go of everything as she leaped off the balcony.
"Shade, hold on... I am coming..."
The fall was painful, but physical pain didn't faze her anymore. It was the loneliness that was unbearable.
Everyone in the room was speechless. Beryl forced her eyes shut as Connie hid her face in the redhead's shoulder.
"I rebelled against everything. My greedy desires... I should never have..." Ray could finally speak again, but their voice was still hoarse from the crying. "I just... wanted that feeling to stay... I just wanted to feel complete."
The others still didn't say a thing. They kept silent, allowing Ray to continue.
"I wanted it so much... that I was willing to throw away everything I was in order to keep that feeling."
Radiant Lumiere's form started glowing intensely, sucking up all light around her. She arrived at the gates and was stopped by two guards. Without realising she absorbed their light, rendering their bodies colorless as they fainted.
She paid no mind and walked past their unconscious bodies.
Let me go.
A tall, white door with golden symbols was in front of her.
Let me go.
Slowly, it creaked open.
Let me go far away.
"But the path of twilight was not mine to take."
He was calling her. She felt it.
Fireflies fluttered around her as she arrived in her favorite place to be.
She felt his presence. He was already there.
A small spectre of light gave away his place in the shadows. Awkwardly, Shade held up his glowing left hand as he stepped out.
"Hey, princess." He said softly, looking at her darkened hand. "You too, huh?" A chuckle. "I can't seem to get you off my mind... isn't that just weird?"
Radiant Lumiere reached for his hand. "Let us become one." She said, a hopeful smile spread across her lips. "Let us end the Titans' tyranny."
"The Titans... they can't die, you know."
"Together we can go beyond limits." Radiant Lumiere was still holding out her hand. "I believe in us."
Shade was slightly taken back by her sudden determination, but gave a smile in return.
Radiant Lumiere nodded. "I accept your darkness." The darkness on her hand crawled further up her arm, having reached her elbow.
Finally Shade grasped her hand. The two looked at each other, becoming closer and closer as an aura of white and black spread out, shaking the area and breaking apart the cavern.
All of Primo shook.
But the duo of light and darkness were far away from reality. Radiant Lumiere closed her eyes as she felt her entire being becoming entwined with Shade's. She was becoming a part of him, and he was becoming a part of her. The darkness should have felt invasive, but it didn't. It felt... comforting in a way.
That moment felt like eternity.
... but eternity wasn't meant to last.
"Cockroach!? Firefly!?"
The two stared straight into the two giant emerald eyes.
Terre. The Unlimited Earthquake of Ruination.
"What are you two doing!?" The huge woman had earthen skin, with overgrowth of moss and fungus all over her body. Her light-brown 'hair' resembled roots and was filled with leaves and twigs. "You shouldn't be here... why are you fly-"
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?"
Terre flinched as another woman, dressed in some kind of military uniform, appeared. Her skin was the color of ashes, save for a crack near her eye, and her hair was a bun made of literal flames. With her chest proudly puffed out, she emitted an aura of dominance.
Ignis. The Endless Inferno of Destruction.
"Do you two understand what you are doing? Look around you!" Some smoke escaped from her mouth, revealing her fangs, as she reached to grab the two of them with her massive hand. They floated out of her reach. "You are disrupting the balance of our world!" She shrieked, gnashing her teeth.
"We will walk the path of twilight." The two declared, clenching their hands tighter.
The fire Titan widened her eyes as the flames in her hair grew. With a yell of fury, she summoned a whip of flames and lashed it into the duo, burning them both on impact as they let go of each other and fell down.
"That's us, Hanan..." Beryl breathed, watching the images of Terre and Ignis fade out. This scene... it filled her with fear, it felt so familiar yet... she couldn't remember it.
Hanan bit her lip and looked away. "No..." She whispered. She didn't want to see Ignis. She didn't want to see her cruelty. "Stop it. Please..."
Suddenly the lantern's light started shining even brighter than before. All four girls felt a pulling sensation from their chests and started to become somewhat drowsy as the scene continued.
Terre caught the bodies of Radiant Lumiere and Shade in her hands.
"Ignis...!?" She spoke meekly, looking up at her fellow Titan. Ignis' breathing was unsteady and the scar beneath her eye burned intensely.
Ignis didn't reply right away. She tried to calm down her breathing as each single breath expelled some smoke. Finally she raised her voice and called out, "AERIS! UNDA!"
Trees shook heavily, some even becoming uprooted as the third Titan flew by and landed in front of them. Her skin was gray like a cloud and her incredibly floofy hair almost could be mistaken for a bunch of feathers. She had two dark purple wings, which she spread out far and wide.
Aeris. The Everlasting Tornado of Chaos.
"What is... happening?" She asked, confused. "What was that... strange light just now?" She, too, flinched when she noticed Ignis' anger.
"We are starting over." Ignis declared, firing up her whip. "Aeris, get Obscuro's ruler and use your winds of chaos to destroy it." Her flames grew as she grinned sadistically. "I will handle Lumo and its pathetic excuse for a ruler. I never liked her."
The air and earth Titans exchanged some concerned looks as Ignis caressed her whip fondly while she marched towards the floating kingdom of Lumo. Aeris cocked her head for a minute before she took off again, leaving Terre alone with the currently dead bodies of Radiant Lumiere and Shade.
As soon as they started showing signs of waking up, Terre panicked and smashed them into the ground, heavily shaking the earth. She redid the process again and again until another voice called behind her.
"Can you be any damn louder!?" The last Titan showed up behind her. Her blue skin was covered with scales and her long, blue hair was flowy, swaying like an ocean. Her eyes were blue and watery, and she wore a deep, irritated frown. "Ugh, what is going on here? Some people are trying to take a nap, namely me."
Unda. The Unstoppable Flood of Misery.
"Unda! Unda!" Terre cried out. "It's Cockroach and Firefly! They want to destroy balance!"
The water Titan's frown morphed into a tense look.
She couldn't say anything as Ignis returned. In her hand she held Lumina, who was yelling at the grinning fire Titan.
"PEOPLE OF PRIMO, I HAVE A DECLARATION TO MAKE!" Ignis straightened her back, wearing a deranged smile. "WE WILL NO LONGER ALLOW LIFE TO FLOURISH ON THIS PLANET NOW THAT BALANCE HAS BEEN DISTURBED!" She held out the hand holding Lumina, the heat of her skin was burning the queen alive. "WE WILL DESTROY EVERYTHING!"
Ignis' scar lit up. "Never again will I give in to a rebellion." She hissed, then laughed, staring down at Radiant Lumiere, who had revived again. "Firefly, look! I want you to witness your dear mommy's demise!"
Radiant Lumiere slowly got back up, just in time to see her mother being crushed in Ignis' fist. With a roaring laugh filled with brutality, the Titan set her fist on fire, then opened it to let the remaining ashes of what used to be Lumina scatter into the wind.
"This is the end of the ruler of Lumo."
Everything stopped. Radiant Lumiere couldn't feel anything. She couldn't see anything. It was all starting to blur.
Suddenly she heard Shade cry out hysterically. Despite being right next to her, his voice sounded distant, like it was miles away from her.
"And now... witness the end of the ruler of Obscuro."
Above her, Aeris held someone else in her hand. The Titan raised her hand and the person she was holding was flown high into the air.
A few seconds later, that person fell down right next to her.
"Noo! No! Stop it! STOP!" Connie completely lost it, screaming out so loud that a couple of windows cracked. "Stop...! Please... please, please, please... I don't want to see this!"
Beryl pulled her close, hugging her tightly in an attempt to calm the girl down. Her breathing sped up alarmingly as she dug her nails into Beryl's shoulder, as if she was scared of her going away.
There was proof right in front of her.
That person was him. Shade's father.
The man she had murdered.
He had told her that so many times... and it hurt... but actually seeing it felt like a punch in the guts.
Ray was crying silent tears as well. "Face your sins, just as I am facing mine..."
That was the first time she had seen Shade cry. The one who normally was boastful, energetic and carefree... was now reduced to a sobbing mess. He was shaking the body of a man dressed in a dark suit, whose limbs were bent in unnatural angles.
"This is your fault!" Shade snapped as she held out her hand to him. "Going against the Titans…? That was the stupidest idea ever!" Tears streamed down his face as he held the body of his father close. "Dad... no... no, no, no... dad, please... wake up...!"
"Grab my hand, Shade." Radiant Lumiere said. She felt nothing. "Together we can-"
"Shut up! Can't you see... this is a hopeless battle that we will never win!?"
Radiant Lumiere took her hand back. "Then... please, believe in me. Just... do that." She said, hoping to be able to reassure him. "Let me handle this, and afterwards... we can join again and make Primo a better place..."
The fireflies started to lose their glow as Radiant Lumiere absorbed it, making her form shine even brighter.
"I always thought I could never really be a part of anything, and that my life would always be the same. I was looking for a reason to keep going... but I could never find one." She managed a genuine smile. "That is... until I met you. You colored my world."
Sighing, she looked down at the remaining pink rose that had sprouted from the ground. "Lucille once said a rose in full bloom can hear wishes, and make them come true. It is not in full bloom yet, but... there is no point in making a wish. I am done wishing."
Radiant Lumiere looked up at the four Titans, and they looked down at her.
"I will not let them... do this..." She said, tears streaming down her face. "I will not allow them to do this! But my own strength will not be enough... so..."
With a wince, she spread her arms, and she felt power overflowing inside of her.
"Believe in me!"
She remembered Lucille's words.
Using those words as strength, she closed her eyes. "Shade, let me do this... for Lucille... for harmony and unity... for you, and for everything you care about."
A silence fell.
"... I believe in you." Shade's voice was solemn but genuine.
Suddenly, she felt an intense beating in her chest.
A mystical light erupted from Radiant Lumiere's heart, taking the form of a colorful, brilliant lantern. A heart of white hovered in it, slowly gaining splotches of gray and black.
With both of her hands, she grasped it and a white light surrounded her. Shortly after, a black stream of light spiraled through the white and caused an explosion of light. The light cleared, unveiling an entirely different looking Radiant Lumiere.
Her hair had grown and dulled slightly, wind blowing it to her sides. A gray robe and a gray heart, with a keyhole, appeared on her chest. Shooting up into the sky, Radiant Lumiere caused the skies around her to convulse.
Distorted wings had sprouted from her back as she hovered above the four Titans, whose expressions ranged from surprise, to fear, to outright fury.
"This power... with it, I will convey your hope. I promise." She spoke to herself. Her voice had a distinct echo that sent a chill down the four Titans' spines. She turned to the four, eyes locking with theirs. "As for you, I will have no mercy for you...!"
The right side of her body had black marks swirling on her skin. Marks bloomed out of her right, black eye, covering part of her face in black. Dark tattoos were wrapped around her right arm and leg. The left side, however, seemed to shine and was covered in glowing marks.
Ignis summoned her flaming whip and exhaled some smoke in her fearsome rage. Behind her, Terre and Aeris were equally dumbfounded, and Unda was crying.
"How can this be possible!?" Ignis' scar burned, more intense than ever. "Stick-bug...?"
Radiant Lumiere laughed, hope ringing in her heart.
"I am endless, unlimited, everlasting, unstoppable, and eternal."
Morgan had pulled her hoodie over her head, to prevent anyone from seeing her fearful tears.
"That was you..." Hanan groaned, holding a hand on her left cheek. The exact same spot where Ignis' scar was. "... You were corrupted... sort of... and allowed darkness inside of you."
Ray nodded slowly.
"I did everything I could to not be alone..." They bit their lip. "But, in the end... I was still alone."
Everyone felt it. The fear, the dread, the panic.
Ray sighed. Each word brought painful, fearsome memories into their mind.
"... Destructive quakes..."
Radiant Lumiere was instantly killed by Ignis' whip. She flickered before her body even crashed to the ground, dimming her light.
"Aw, look at you... digging your own grave! I could just eat you right up!" Terre snickered, picking her up by the back of her robes and holding her in front of her face. Just as she started to gain consciousness again Terre opened her mouth and chewed down on Radiant Lumiere like she was a gemstone.
The Titan chewed and chewed before swallowing what would be her last meal.
"All right, girls!" She grinned. "What's next on the menu? I can't wait to-"
She never got to finish her sentence as an excruciating pain came from her stomach area before gray light burst out of her, followed by chains which wrapped around her body. A black sword came out of her stomach and green liquid started leaking out of the wound. The earth Titan let out a scream as she was sliced open from the inside out.
Resting in Radiant Lumiere's right hand was a sword of darkness. She held it with shaking hands as her breathing grew heavier.
Terre's screams died out as she crumbled into pieces.
The only thing left behind were two, big emeralds.
"... Scorching flames..."
The three remaining Titans starred in complete shock at what they had just witnessed.
"Te... Terre... Terre? What happened... to Terre... ?" Aeris whimpered, folding her wings closer to herself. Behind her, Unda cried louder, and in front of her, Ignis fired up her whip, along with both her hair and eyes.
Radiant Lumiere summoned a shield of light in her free hand in an attempt to stop the flames as the fire Titan charged for her. Sparks of gold sprayed out from the impact of the flames against the shield.
Ignis was relentless. She had no mercy and kept, literally, whipping down Radiant Lumiere, burning her alive. Every time she revived and flew back up, Ignis managed to hit her down again. It was like a vicious, endless cycle of destruction.
Sometimes she spat fire, other times she grabbed Radiant Lumiere with her hand but most of Radiant Lumiere's flickers were caused by meeting Ignis' whip.
"You think you stand a chance against me, The Endless Inferno of Destruction? How cute, little firefly!"
Radiant Lumiere didn't give up. She kept coming back up. She kept trying.
She couldn't let Shade down. She couldn't let Lucille down. She couldn't let mo-
Another flicker.
The flames hurt... it hurt more than anything she had ever felt. To feel her skin being painfully burning away was too much.
But she kept going. Raising her left hand with a yell, an intense beam of light shot out of her glowing palm...
... And it went right through Ignis' left eye.
Drops of steaming red fell to the ground as Ignis roared in pain. Flames erupted from her body, going wild as she clutched her wounded face.
Again, gray chains sprouted from the lock on Radiant Lumiere's chest and wrapped around Ignis' body.
"You will pay for that, pitiful sti-!"
The last thing Ignis felt was shock as Radiant Lumiere pierced her sword right through her.
Ignis exploded into flames, setting the surrounding area on fire.
"... Harsh winds..."
The wind Aeris left behind caused the fire to spread even more. Still not used to her own, odd wings, Radiant Lumiere gave chase after the air Titan.
"... You must be hurting a lot right now. I'm sorry, firefly." Spreading her massive wings again to keep Radiant Lumiere at bay, Aeris looked somber. "You want to be with him... but you can't..."
Aeris twisted the wind violently behind her, causing Radiant Lumiere to get knocked against trees, rocks, and even back into the wayward flames. Razor-sharp wind tore through her, but she forced herself to keep going.
As her darkened, golden hair swayed in the wind, Radiant Lumiere kept her lips pressed together in a thin line. She didn't want to waste words on any of them.
Aeris suddenly crashed to the ground as a beam of pure light struck one of her wings, leaving a hole in it as gray blood started pouring out.
"... Please, help me!" Aeris cried out, tears forming in her eyes. "Help... me... please..."
Chains shot from Radiant Lumiere's chest again, binding the fallen Titan in place.
Weakly, Aeris managed to get up to face Radiant Lumiere again, but by then it was too late and a sharp pain went through her neck.
Aeris dissolved into chaotic wind, sending the blonde flying to the other side of Primo.
"... Breathtaking seas..."
Primo was overflowing with water.
When Radiant Lumiere finally found Unda, she was in complete hysterics at seeing the glowing being hovering over them.
"No, no! Go away!"
Her tears caused Primo to flood even more, submerging Radiant Lumiere in the raging water.
After going through so much pain moments before, drowning a couple dozen times wasn't that bad. It was painless, every time.
Unda cried and cried, but she knew it wouldn't help. It was too late.
"Firefly..."
Something sharp pierced her chest and pain started to spread throughout her body.
Everything shattered and the last Titan died.
"And hopeless darkness..."
Twilight dyed the sky.
A blade of darkness rested in her right hand, and a shield of light floated in front of her left. She lowered her head as her shoulders shook, letting tears flow freely.
Her hands brought this... what was supposed to be salvation...
Instead, she looked at a destroyed world.
Primo was in absolute discord. The skies rumbled, and the planet shook. The earth was splitting open, falling apart, crumbling, and leaving nothing behind.
The blade and shield dissolved as Radiant Lumiere could feel her consciousness being pulled away. The darkness stirred inside her and her energy started leaking out.
She hugged herself and wept as Primo fell apart. She could have sworn she saw two brief flashes of gold but her vision turned completely black.
The next thing she knew, she was sitting on a floating piece of land in nothingness. She was still in her transformed state but the distorted wings had disappeared.
Radiant Lumiere cried.
"Ray?" Shade's voice gave returned a bit of hope to her and she looked up, only to be met with complete darkness. "Ray, what did you do?"
She felt five presences. One of them was obviously Shade, but there were four more... yet... they were too clouded in darkness to recognise, or even really notice. She didn't think too hard of it. It didn't matter right now. Her head hurt. She wanted to sleep.
"I could not... I..."
Shade placed his light-stained hand over hers and drained out all the darkness from her. "You can have your light back." He leaned closer to the blonde and his shaky voice turned into a whisper. "I committed the sin of believing in you."
Her hope shattered.
Ray stopped breathing. Their eyes went to their hand. Not a single mark of darkness was to be found. It was as if it had never been there.
"I... I cannot believe I forgot most of what happened during the battle..." Their eyes darted away for a second. "Everything leading up to it... those memories are so vivid..." Pulling on their hair, Ray's eyes grew wide. "Mother was already dead... Nox was already dead... yet I... was so sure he was the one who was doing all this... I thought..."
There were too many thoughts going through their mind. They couldn't properly process any of them and instead broke down crying as all the windows shattered, fading away into light.
"No, no. It's okay, Ray." Hanan spoke up, holding up her hand but not touching them. "A lot happened. It must have been hard. You likely blocked it out." She smiled compassionately. "I'm glad you told us. Thank you for trusting us with your story."
Beryl nodded in agreement. "Yes! I love you sooooooooo much Ray! I would hug you if you... you know... didn't hate that..."
"You could have told us... earlier." Morgan's voice was soft and stoic, but the scorn in her words was clear. "A lot of things would have been easier if you had."
Hanan gave Morgan a scolding look but the shorter girl didn't back down, instead her face twisted into an intense grimace.
"You could have told us. You could have told us about you letting yourself be corrupted by darkness, yet antagonise us, or anyone for something like that. You could have told us you were some dumb Juliet to our enemy's Romeo or whatever!" Morgan threw her hands in the air with a groan. She seemed like she was on the verge of exploding into full-blown anger but instead backed off and looked away. "Ugh... whatever...you little nasty..."
"No!" Ray cried out, desperate. "I hate him! I hate him... I hate... him... hate..."
They took back the Eternal Lantern inside their heart and stood up, holding the book against their chest.
"You're lying." Connie's tone wasn't accusatory. It was sad. "I can see it clearly."
Ray snapped their head to her, breaths uneven as their form shook.
"You do not hate him. Please, stop lying to yourself..." It was obvious Connie felt slightly intimidated by Ray's glare, but she swallowed her fear and kept speaking. "That smile you had when telling the story... it says enough..." Connie straightened her back, expression serious. "You're scared to accept your feelings."
It felt like an arrow shot right through their heart.
"I know... I know... but... maybe... just maybe... maybe... if I... if I say it enough times... I will actually be-... believe it..." Ray's attempts to say more were in vain as their voice seemed to completely break. As fast as their body allowed they walked to the fireplace. The flames still crackled in the corner, lighting up the room just a bit more.
Running their fingers over the book, Ray tried to empty their thoughts before tossing it into the fire. They ignored the gasps behind them as they watched the book being consumed by the flames.
As the book turned into ashes, Ray felt something stir inside them. A feeling they had sheltered for so long withered away with the book.
I am sorry.
They felt relieved, in a sense... but that nagging emptiness remained.
It would never leave, but it will also never be filled.