Chaxra - Hehe, sorry. I checked your profile after I posted the chapter, and yes, you ARE INDEED a girl. -too lazy to go back and edit the last chapter.-
Alright, alright...
Songs used in Chapter 3:
Savage Garden : I Knew I Loved You
From First to Last : ...And We All Have a Hell.
Songs used in Chapter 4:
Jeffree Star : Eyelash Curlers and Butcher Knives
FFTL IS THE SHIT!!!! Seriously, if you're into metal that's a little lighter and the lyrics are seriously twisted, check out '...And We All Have a Hell' and 'Ride the Wings of Pestilence' by them. 'One Armed Boxer vs The Flying Guillotine' is pretty sweet, too.
Alright, alright... here we go...
Kingdom Karaoke
aka
"Why You Don't Let Demyx Talk You Into Doing Anything Involving A Microphone"
Chapter 4 - 13 Bottles of Elixir on the Wall.
Pairings: Guess what?! OMG, SAME AS LAST TIME. Only, no more DemVex. If you like DemVex, I have two oneshots up, because I was feeling DemVex-y.
Disclaimer: Waaaaah. I have a kitten named Kadaj? Does that count for anything? (No, I seriously do. My kitten's name is Kadaj Mephistopheles Strife-Leonheart, because I'm lame like that. He's gray and white with blue-green eyes.)
Warning: Er... if you're still reading this... I LOVE YOU. You dun need any warnings.
Inspirations: -throws confetti everywhere.- MY REVIEWS! THEY KEEP ME GOING!
OMGEE-SUS! THIS THING HAS SIX ALERTS!!! So, special thanks to...
Chaxra-san
RaiPhoenix015
GameM
MoonCry
My Chemical Romance Dude (YEAAAAAH! MCR RULES)
Sakura Shoizu
And also LuthienSky, who has reviewed my VexDem stories, is a HUGE VexDem fan, and has the BEST VexDem video on YouTube. CHECK IT OUT. If you like VexDem, that is.
Okay, now the chapter can start.
--
As soon as someone had screamed, "SOMEBODY GET ANOTHER KARAOKE MACHINE! NOW!" one appeared. Yes, appeared: just like Organization XIII members do out of that swirling darkness thingy. Forevermore, this karaoke machine would be called Karaoke Machine XIII or the Karaoke Machine that Never Was.
No one knew who screamed, though. Everyone figured it was Marluxia, but Marluxia was on the other side of the castle doing naughty things in Vexen's lab that other people write fanfiction about because this author is too OCD to write about naughty things in science labs.
Maybe it was... um... Larxene? Yes, it was Larxene, because she wanted to record Zexion and Lexaeus, the only two who were not drunk or just being retarded, singing karaoke.
"Alright, alright, everyone... settle down..." Axel said, standing and waving his hands at the eager throng. "Zexion and Lexaeus can sing next... but... I get to choose the song."
Zexion frowned. "Why?" he asked.
"Because, you ruined my song and made me scare Dem and Rox. That's why, got it memorized?" the Flurry of Dancing Flames quipped.
The Cloaked Schemer rolled his eyes, but figured fair was fair. Axel went to the stage and flipped through the songbook, looking for the perfect song that would humilate his hateful superiors.
It took him five minutes, which, for an anxious crowd of people who really, really want to see someone sing because they know something hilarious is going to happen, is FOREVER.
Twice, someone shouted, "HURRY IT UP, ALREADY!" (Much like the author's little sister when said author is trying to type up her fanfiction on the computer. Okay, okay, I'll stop now!)
Axel poked a few buttons on the Karaoke Machine that Never Was, just to make sure it worked, and beckoned numbers V and VI up to the stage.
"Yeah! Go Zexy and Lexy!" Demyx hooted.
Marluxia and Vexen, half dressed and covered in sweat (and probably something else, but no one wanted to know!), portal'd back into the room.
"We HAVE to see this!" Marluxia explained, taking a seat, and pulling Vexen into his lap.
"Gah! Number XI!" he protested.
"Shut up," the Graceful Assassin commanded, and Vexen complained no more.
The music, which was techno with a heavy beat.
The background voice kicked in. "Star... I'm a fucking star..."
Zexion's eye widened.
"I got my hair fixed, makeup done, I'm ready to go.
Step in the club and you know I'm the show.
Diamonds in my teeth are always a' glow.
Blinded as I speak, mesmerized by my flow..." Zexion sang lamely, frozen and a little bit angry.
Behind him, Lexaeus mumbled the words, his lumberjack frame shaking in fright.
"COME ON! YOU CAN SING BETTER THAN THAT, ZEXY!" Demyx encouraged.
"You can't say no.
Sooo lettts go..." Zexion sang, feeling a bit better because no one was laughing at him.
Yet.
"L-let's g-go..." Lexaeus echoed shakily.
"Spit on the dance floor to know where you are.
Slip to the beat 'cuz you wanna go far." Now he was getting into it. The Melodious Nocturne had stood up, feeling the need to dance, and the Flurry of Dancing Flames and the Graceful Assassin had joined him. Dude, they just wanted to dance. (1)
"Know you loooove..
An I looove "that I'm Jeffree Star"..." the background voice sang.
"Spit on the dance floor to know where you are.
Slip to the beat drivin' in my pink car..."
Now they laughed. Loudly, and not in the 'we're laughing with you!' way, because everyone knows that it BULLSHIT. They were laughing in the 'Haha! Zexion likes pink!' way... then they stopped.
How the hell would Zexion get a car?
Number VI dropped the microphone and shuffled off stage, dragging the Silent Hero by the sleeve. Lexaeus's teeth were chattering, and he was near tears.
"I hate Axel..." he whimpered.
Then the Karaoke Machine that Never Was portal'd out.
"Well, that sucks," Roxas said. "I didn't even get to sing."
"You didn't even want to sing," the redhead said.
"So, what?" the blond retorted. "No one even asked me if I wanted to sing."
The emerald eyed nobody pondered that for a moment. "So, if someone had asked you to sing, you would have?" he asked.
"No!" the blue-eyed boy replied. "But, it would have been nice if someone offered..."
"Did you feel left out?" Demyx asked as he strolled up to them. Everyone was slowly filing out of the Recreational Room of Eternal Proscrastination.
Roxas shook his head. "Nope. I'm perfectly fine with being the only one who was not humiliated and didn't humiliate anyone else tonight. I also wasn't almost killed," he said proudly.
"Shrimp..." Larxene muttered from some distance away.
"Actually, neither was Luxord," Demyx corrected, but Roxas knew that the Gambler of Fate was going to do some singing real soon.
In fact, the last song that anyone in the Castle that Never Was heard was a rousing chorus of '13 Bottles of Elixir on the Wall,' sung by the first three members of the Organization, plus VII and X.
Theeee Ennnnnnd!
--
(1) "Dude, I Just Wanna Dance" is copyrighted to Dane Cook. Yaaay! Dane Cook!
Alright, let's give it up for the wonderfully talented Organization XIII!
Zexion, Lexaeus, Larxene, and Saix: I HATE YOU.
Aww, why, Saix-chan? You can finally get some!
Saix: Because... um... you suck. -scurries away.-
Yaaay. I think I managed to cram all of my favorite pairings into one crack fic.
Roxas: Except for Zemyx. And XigLux. And DemyMaru. And MarZex. And, Roxas/Demyx. -shameless Demyx whoring.-
-grumbles.- Well, I can't always get what I want!
Hope you guys enjoyed!