This has not been easy
this has been hard
I am scarred
and I do not know what to do with you

At the end of the day, Meredith waited outside on the bench. The storm hadn't fully come to a halt, but had calmed down quite a bit. Rain, and an occasional bolt of lightin was all that remained. She hated this; if she stayed inside she was bound to run back into Derek, which at this point she thought would be the absolute worst thing in the world, considering their earlier encounter and proceedure together. If she stayed outside, she would be stuck in the terrible storm. She wished so badly that she and Aiden had taken seperate cars now, but it was too late; he had the keys, and there was no way to get home unless she wanted to walk, which wasn't going to happen. Meredith was confused and lost; she had so many feelings rushing through her body -- ones of hate, love, lust, and regret. Sometimes she wished that she would have just stayed with Derek, to keep trying, and get passed what happened. The other half of her was glad that she ditched him, afterall, he did cheat on her, and that was just not acceptable. Leaning back on the bench, she sighed deeply, letting her head fal backwards. She instantly met with his face, causing her to practically jump out of her seat and land on the floor.

go inside, kiss your mouth with my lips
grab your hips, cant remember why i fell in love with this.

He cocked his head, a worried look on his face, "Mere, why are you outside? Have you really gotten over your fear?"

Suprised by his presence, she quickly made herself presentable by slidding the wrinkles out of her shirt, standing up straight, "That's none of your buisness for one, for two, no I haven't, and for three, whay are you even talking to me? I hate you rememeber?? Remember, you slept with Addison, chased after me, I left, planning on never seeing you again, I met Aiden, and now we are happy, then you showed up to screw everything up?"

"Thats not how I remember it." He said softly.

"Oh really? You see it differently?" She almost yelled at him. A long silenced came next, making Meredith uncomfortable, "Well then, why don't you just tell me how you see it? I'm probably gonna hear it soon anyways!" His worried look dissapeared as his facial expression dropped into a frown. He looked at the floor, one hand in his pocket, the other holding his briefcase, "Well?" She inquired.

"Mer-" He began, cutting himself off as he looked around quickly, trying to think of what to say. He was trying at this point to hold back the tears that were stinging his eyes, "Mere, ju- I'ts just," he stopped again, turning his head to look down at the floor once again. By this time her expression of anger had softened, he was trying so hard, but it was too much, "What I was going to say. . .Well, all that I can say is that I can't make up anymore excuses for what I did to you. What I did. . .what I did was just unacceptable, and the absolute worst decision of my life. I can't really explain what happened, and I know that's not good enough, and I know that a simple apology is not good enough, and it never will be. But. . .but i want to make it up to you," His vioce now began to crack as he spoke, "I want to make it up to you," he repeated, now looking up into her eyes,"It will be hard. . .and I know your happy, and I know that. . .I just know." He cleared his throat, trying to maintain his composure, "I know that your happy, but I want to be happy too. Just please, talk to me, love me, let me have one more chance," He took a few steps toward her, placing his warm hand on her cold cheek, "It's a lot to ask, I know," he whispered, "But. . .just one more time. I need you Mere." She was looking directly up at him now, their bodies touching as tears brimmed her eyes. He leaned down, placing his lips gently on top of hers.

but i miss you, i love you
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no
you beg me you ask me to kiss you and hug you
you wont be getting my affection again cause oh no
i dont need you tonight

She stayed only a moment under Derek's kiss, pulling away from him, "No," She whispered, shaking her head as she backed up, tears still brimming her eyes, "No, you don't get another chance Derek. We spent eight years together, EIGHT YEARS! And the day before our anniversary, you screw my best friend who is practically my sister?!?! No! You aren't forgiven, and you never will be! I don't love you anymore, I love Aiden, and thats that!"

"Mere-"

"No! You can't Mere, Merbear me anymore. You lost that right a long time ago. I don't know why you slept with Addison, and frankly, I DON'T CARE!" She said, practically screaming at the top of her lungs.

"Meredith, calm down," He said, taking a step toward her, brushing her elbow. She immediately pulled away from his touch, backing up until the rain was pouring down on her head, "NO! DO NOT TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" she screamed as tears began to roll down her face. Taking another step forward, Derek was immediately intercepted by a young male doctor that was still dressed in his scrubs.

Who do you think you are?
No one cares about a name without a face,
so dont go shooting up the place
make no mistake the loves not real
cause the love that i got is deeper so much deeper than you could ever feel

"Who the Hell do you think you are?" He yelled at him as he took Meredith into his arms, "It's ok, Mere, everything is ok now. What do you think your doing?" He turned his attention from Meredith back to Derek, letting her go to face him.

"Who are you?" Derek questioned curiously. Ever since he had gotten to Seattle, the only things he heard from the male doctors was 'Meredith, Meredith, Meredith,' and he wasn't quite sure why.

"I am her brother, who are you?" He questioned.

"Meredith doesn't have any brothers," He stated as a matter of factly.

"Well, I am her new found brother. . .Your the one who broke her aren't you?" Derek opened his mouth to speak at Burke's accusation, but stopped. He was right; he broke Meredith. Thats why she fell back on Aide, for support. He silently cursed at himself for everythig that he had done.

"Preston stop!" Meredith intervened, "I can handle this by myself," she said, wiping a solomn tear from her face.

"Meredith. . ." Preston tried to persuade her.

"No, I'm ok. Aiden will be here soon, and we can go home together." She said, trying to calm herself down, "Just go inside Preston, just go. I can handle this, don't worry about me."

"I'm worried." He said, eyeing Derek before his pager went off, "Damn." He muttered, "Meredith I have to go, but if he does anything you don't like, just tell me and I'll beat him to a pulp," He said before kissing her on the forehead and running back into Seattle Grace, glancing back before he entered to see that she was alright.

it was really nice to know you
but, theres nothing left to show you
i got bills to pay get out the way its time to move on
and even with your boyfriend, will never be the same again
Discuss me over cigarettes and say to him...

Meredith looked back at Derek, cocking her head, "I'm sorry. . .I just can't forgive you. Not now. . .not ever Derek. I have to go, goodbye." She began to walk away, not knowing exactly where she was going, she just had to het away from him.

"Meredith," He said quickly and desperately before she passed him, grabbing her arm, "Don't say goodbye. Goodbye means that we will never see each other again." He said, seriously.

She smiled, letting out a small giggle to herself as she remembered everytime that he said that in the past, " I have to go Derek. I have a life to run, to fix. I have to pick up all my pieces, and Aiden is helping me put them back together. I have a house to take care of, a job to do, bills to pay. I've moved on, and now it's time for you to. Honestly, I wish this was goodbye, but sadly, I don't think it is." She said before walking away, leaving Derek alone in front of Seattle Grace Hospital.

i miss you, i love you
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no
you beg me you ask me
to kiss you and hug you
you wont be getting my affection again
cause oh no, i dont need you
and i miss you, i love you
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no
you beg me, you ask me to
to kiss you and hug you
you wont be getting my affection again
cause oh no, I dont need you tonight

"Miss You, Love You" By Maroon 5