You're Obsessed With Naruto When…
A/N: Before I begin, I would like to say that this is my first fanfiction overall. It's a little oneshot telling whether you are obsessed with Naruto.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything Naruto. The Sasuke poster, which is hanging on my room, however, is mine.
You would rather poke your eyes out with a red hot poker than read a fanfic of a pairing that you don't like
You wear your Ninja headgear, gloves, etc to school and don't get why you get so many stares from your peers
You sleep every night with your Naruto plushies
But only Sasuke gets the area between your cleavage for extra warmth during the winter
You believe that Konoha village is real.
When you and your family finally get to visit Japan for vacation, you run wild on the city streets, searching in vain for Konoha village
When asked to name the major religions of world, you will respond with out hesitation: Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam, and Narutoism
You have a shrine dedicated to Masashi Kisimoto in your room
The hidden village symbols are a recurring theme in your doodles…
…and so are shurikens…
Your locker is decorated with random Naruto screenshots
As well as your favorite binder/folder
You have read all the Naruto manga there possibly can be
You have watched all the Naruto episodes and know the lines by heart
You have every rumor memorized for each episodes as well as your own theories
You obsess over character bios
You listen to a song and a Naruto AMV begins to take shape
You have CDs burned with songs that remind you of Naruto
You put off homework and other important projects to read fanfictions
You've even made fanfictions yourself
You say to your friends, "Wanna know what's under my mask?"
You say, "ANOTHER MASK!"
Sadly enough, your friends actually get the joke
You've accidentally mistaken the hottest guy in school for Sasuke
The bitchy popular girl is mistaken for Ino
When you're angry, you start doing hand signs
Your principal had to save your Naruto plushies from being posed in sexual positions
You use your plushies as a threat against your unruly friends, saying that you'll make Sasuke and Shikamaru make out with each other
You are convinced that jutsus are real
When you hear birds chirping, you think you have accomplished Chidori
You are definitely convinced that you have control over your chakra
Such activities include climbing a tree with your chakra focused on your feet
You run up the tree and then crash to the ground with a violent thud sound
This continues on for one hour
You come back home with many broken bones and many vicious looking bruises
The next day, you are convinced that you posses the Byakugan
You spend three hours trying to make your chakra veins bulge
You find a toad and try to sit on it, believing that you have performed the summoning jutsu
The toad keeps hopping away from you…
You treat foxes with great respect
Screw Harry Potter, who needs is when you have the greatest piece of fictional work in your hands?
You have made a messed up list on the stages of life that Naruto will go through. Age 13: Goth, Age 14: Rapper, Age 16: Hippie, Age 17: Stripper, Age 25: Terminator Macho Buff Guy, Age 50: Nudist and so on and so on
You draw your most favorite character over and over and over again until they are PERFECT
And then you draw them over again.
When asked to write a hero essay for English class, you choose your favorite character as your hero. No matter how beautifully written and the amount of time that was wasted composing this essay, you receive an F. Even though you deliberately knew that you couldn't do anyone fictional
You name household appliances after characters
Then you have little conversations with them
You parents take you to a child psychiatrist because they think you hear voices in your head
You make yourself a certificate reading "Certified Member of the Akatsuki"
You life long dream is to become a ninja (and then betray your village…)
You visit a specialty mall and see a store that sells only ramen
They even have mannequins holding ramen bowls…
You take pictures of the store and give them out to your fan friends in school
That store was probably the highlight of your entire life
Final Note: I hope that you will not be greatly disturbed by my reasons, but on the other hand, just click on the little purple button that says go…
Thank you for taking the time to read and review the first chapter of my little oneshot.
REVIEW NO JUTSU!