Disclaimer: All I own is my computer and the FCC can take that over according to the label.
Title: I know it, and I'm mortified.
Rating: T, cause I'm almost a grown-up.
Summary: My favorite Drunken Duo takes over the world…in their skivvies! The bridesmaids won't be revisited, but they will be talked about. To My Favorite PDLD Writers! Takes place during "Bridesmaids Revisited". Rory and Finn become close friends. Jealousy and hi-jinks ensue!
Rory plopped herself on the bed and stared at the article in her hand, she never thought a heap of metal, plastic and wires would ever bring her such pain. Pain so deep that it was beyond physical pain, she felt hallow, like a ghost, like there was nothing left of her but her head, and tears; tears that she cried until she couldn't breathe and her lungs hurt her from taking in too much air. But it wasn't the heap of metal and plastic that caused her this pain; it was the heap of blood, guts and vodka that brought her this pain, and the heap of blood, guts and blonde hair that caused it. She looked to the phone in her hands and flipped it open, instinctively her fingers passed over ten numbers and she raised the phone to her ear.
"Hot sex chat line! Where the chat is always hot, and the line is always sexy."
She sniffled a bit before answering, "Mom?"
"Rory? What's wrong?" Rory could hear the worry in her mother's voice.
"I—just—Mommy, I need you." Rory finally got out after beginning a million different sentences in her mind. The tears were streaming from her eyes, but she didn't bother wiping them away.
"Mommy's here hun, what's wrong? Where's Logan?" Her mother knew that she was going to Honor's wedding with Logan and she knew that something wasn't right when at the sound of Logan's name Rory let out a cry.
"What's happing sweetie? Are you okay, is Logan okay? I'm going to need a little more information Ror; you're letting Mommy worry too much."
"Well, I guess it was nothing more than society at its best." Rory said, her cries lingering at the back of her throat. "At that wedding I went to with Logan, he left me in the bride's chambers with his sister and the bridesmaids…"
"Yeah…"
"And it turns out that the only person he didn't sleep with in that room was his sister." Rory heard Lorelai's gasp through the phone, she could almost feel it.
"That whore!" Lorelai announced incredulously.
"That's what I said." Rory agreed. Her mother was quiet for a moment thinking.
"Where are you now sweetie?"
"I don't know. Huntington, I guess, it's what the woman said when we got here—"
"We?" Lorelai interrupted. "We who? You and who makes 'we'?"
"Finn and me 'makes we'."
"Finn as in the alcoholic, but can't be classified as an alcoholic because he's from Australia where they drink so much on a regular basis that if he was a real alcoholic there, in America he would be classified as dead?"
"That's the one." Rory said simply not completely over her latest break down, although her quirk for a mother was bringing up her spirits.
"How did that happen?"
"I don't know, well I do, but it was weird. There I was standing outside, waiting for a cab to take me home and then he came and…got me drunk."
"Wait, what? Did you just say you were going to take a cab home? From NEW YORK?" Lorelai thought for a second. "Did you just say that a dead Australian got my baby, my one and only drunk? Are you still wearing your clothes?" Lorelai almost couldn't believe it, but this was Rory and only things this crazy could happen to a Gilmore.
"Well, actually?"
"Wait, I don't want to know." Lorelai said quickly, she was only half kidding about the clothes thing. "Wait, yes I do. Break it to me quick." Lorelai blurted
"Well I—"
"C'mon Rory, quick as a wink."
"I was wearing a three hundred dollar dress that I didn't even pay for and Finn bought me some I heart NY crap disguised as an outfit!" She spat out.
"Good job! But no hanky panky?"
"No, but that was that time in the elevator when I passed out drunk and he took advantage of my limp body." Rory joked.
"What?"
"Nothing Mom, we actually have a two bedroom suite, which means that there are two whole walls dividing us."
"You sure?"
"Yes, not mention he's just a friend and although I am currently questioning my availability, he is currently dating someone."
"Okay." They fell into a comfortable silence before Lorelai spoke again. "How are you holding up hun?"
"Okay, I guess, he called me. I didn't speak to him, I couldn't, and then I called you. I feel so betrayed. I mean, it was in November, during our break, but a break does not mean broken up, ya know? It's just not fair, I shouldn't feel this way. It's his fault."
"I understand babe, remember when your dad found out Sherry was pregnant? I was crushed, but eventually you'll feel better, I promise."
"I know, but it hurts now."
"I know babe."
"Mom?"
"Yeah sweets?"
"Thank you."
"Anytime, I love you sweetheart."
"I love you too Mom."
"Rory honey, get some sleep, but promise me you'll take out some time, throw caution to the wind and watch a few romantic comedies with egregious amounts of junk food, preferably of the candy variety."
"I promise Mom, I actually bought some candy when Finn bought me this offensive outfit." Rory kidded, she thought the outfit was utterly offensive but she did it to herself, there was still a bag full of slightly more demure clothes, better fitting clothes, but she was comfortable enough, she only put it on to play a joke on Finn. She loved the way his eyes popped out when he saw her, and she could feel him watching her as she left.
"Okay sweets, goodnight and don't forget to lock you door, drunk men can be relentless." Lorelai warned jokingly.
"Okay Mom, goodnight, I love you."
"I love you too, bye."
"Bye."
Rory lied on the bed below her and stared at the ceiling phone in hand, just, thinking. She thought about what her mother said, she was right, it would take time, but eventually she will get over…him. The heap that she had come to dread began to buzz in her hand and the familiar tone of 'La Cucaracha' began to play. She looked to her hand. 'Huntz' She pressed the side buttons until it stopped buzzing and turned it off. Never mind, she didn't want to think anymore.
The wedding was over and Logan was watching his sister and her new husband go off to their honeymoon in Capri. He was beguiled by the phone call from earlier, Finn was drunk but that wasn't as surprising as the way Rory acted, who the hell is Miffy?
"Hey Sexy," A woman, obviously drunk, said from behind him as she slung her thin arm around his waist. Her breath was hot as it brushed the short hairs near his neck, Bourbon, he supposed. He could feel her tongue hovering near his ear.
"Megan." He whispered bitterly taking a swig from his drink. She backed up and gasped quickly.
"No, Sofia silly." She giggled brainlessly as she resumed her position against him. Logan stood stiff as he searched for the brunette that he assumed held the answer to his current conundrum. He chuckled coldly as he turned to face the redhead. Finn would love you. His thoughts must have rolled off of his tongue because before he knew it she leaned into him, their lips millimeters apart and she purred to him,
"He already has." She smiled and bit her bottom lip seductively.
He smiled coolly. "Have you seen Megan?"
She pouted and leaned closer into him. "Oh you don't want Megan," she cooed "Besides, Megan left." Shit. Logan growled inwardly and sighed.
"What did Megan tell Rory?"
"Rory?"
"Yeah, Rory, Gilmore, my girlfriend."
"Your girlfriend? You have a girlfriend?" She asked in amazement.
"Yeah, tall, thin, brunette, blue eyes…quiet."
"Oh her? Nothing. But Walker told her about that time in November when you guys hooked up." Logan's eyes jumped out of his head, he was not expecting that, how could his little tryst come up in conversation? But then again these were his sister's friends he was talking about, it shouldn't surprise him if they discussed all of their past escapades, including quite a few politicians—married politicians. At least they didn't—
"And I told her about that time in Fresno, you know, at Thanksgiving…in the hot tub." Sofia whispered seductively. "Oh yeah, Megan told her about you and her in December." She stated.
"Fuck." What luck? Logan thought to himself. He looked down to the redhead obviously throwing herself at him and politely stepped away from her as her raised his cell phone to his ear yet again. He needed to get a wireless headset, because this risk of brain cancer thing wasn't very appealing. The phone rang twice and went to voicemail, he just got ignored. He tried again but Finn's phone was obviously off. Fuck. What was he going to do now?
Rory left her room in what she would normally call less-than-clothes and sat across from Finn, her back to the television. She raised her hands onto the coffee table where Finn was back to lining up bottles of alcohol.
"Hit me!" She said pouting and slapping the table from her position on the floor.
"What's your pleasure love?" Finn's deep, husky voice filled the air, and Rory's ears drank his words. The smirk on his face acknowledged the innuendo in his simple question. Rory looked him boldly in the eye.
"Something hard and strong."
"Can you handle it?" Finn raised a questioning eyebrow.
"I'm a big girl, love." Rory said as she took a small bottle from his line. The light brown liquid burned as it went down her throat. "Smooth." Rory smiled, she looked up to Finn who was matching her shot. His eyes twinkled, she thought.
"Rory?" he said wincing as he felt the affects of the alcohol.
"Yes?"
"Why are we here?" Finn had a pretty good idea of why they were there, Logan, the idiot that he is cheated on Rory, probably somewhat unabashedly.
"What?"
"Why are you and I, here in a hotel room and not on our way back to Connecticut to be with our significant others?" Finn asked watching her intently preparing himself for whatever was to come next. "Just tell me love…" he said leaning closer to her, the coffee table still between them.
Rory's jaw began to quiver a bit, she felt too open around him now. She didn't know what to say—how to break it to him—or herself, again. She sighed heavily. "Logan had sex with the entire bridal party, excluding his sister—I hope. In November, during out little break—did you know we had a break? Because we did." Yep, quick as a wink. He was right, he was sorry he was right.
"I'm sorry love."
"Me too." She said refusing to meet his eyes, looking at his cheek, then his ear, his hair, his other ear.
"Look at me." Finn turned her head to meet his gaze with his hand. "My friend is an idiot. He's a guy, too much of a guy and a complete idiot. I'm not going to make any excuses for him, but in you had that guy in a whirlwind, he was off his rocker and those girls, Honor's friends, are sluts. Trust me."
"Why are you being so good to me?"
"Because you're a good person." Finn smiled and sat back on the couch. He diverted his eyes to the television.
"I wish I was as strong as her." Rory thought out loud.
"Who love?"
"My mother." Rory told him about her parents and Sherry and Gigi. Finn watched this young woman revert back to a little girl as she relieved parts of her childhood. "…and every birthday she calls to tell me the story of my birth."
"You two must be really close."
"Yeah, we are. Tell me about you parents." Rory said getting up to sit on her heels. Finn's eyes lit up and, if she wasn't mistaken, his ears jumped with his smile.
"Oh I love my parents. A lot of these kids around here hold this resentment for their parents, they constantly whine about how their parents are controlling their lives and when they grow up they're going to "leave it all and get back to…" Get back to what? All the while they're still spending their parents' money. I love my parents, if running some company will make my family happy, why not? I'm only here, in America, because I want to do everything I can for them. My dad is the best, he's always there, and he really cares about his family. And my mum, God I love her, she's so warm. But I can say, they don't like the drinking, they definitely don't like the drinking." Finn ranted and raved about his family, Rory came to learn that he was named after his maternal grandfather, he has an older sister and a niece not named Sheila, but Amanda. His sister's name was Reese and his parents' names were Stacey and April. Yeah his dad had a girly name. And his brother-in-law's name was Michael. He had quite a few cousins and every January Finn disappears for a week to visit them during summer vacation.
"Then she grabs my face and kisses me!" Rory retold. "So tell me about your greatest Mtv Spring break moment."
"Well mine was more of the 'Pimp My Ride/Overhaulin' variety."
"What? No way, I told you about one of the most embarrassing times of my life."
"My spring break moments are too Girls Gone Wild for Mtv."
"Don't you mean Boys Gone Wild?" Rory asked trying to decipher between his drunken slurs and her slurred mind.
"Nope." Finn raised his eyebrow suggestively. Rory laughed and hit him lightly.
"Okay so tell me your story."
"Well when I was seventeen, I drove a regular 323 Convertible, no big deal, it's Australia, what would I look like if I didn't have a convertible."
"Someone who expected rain?"
"Haha, funny love. Anyway, I drove the car, I loved it, I mean it was my car but one day it disappeared." Finn looked distraught as he relived the moment and Rory gasped for effect giggling soon there after not able to hold her serious face for much longer. Finn turned to her, as if giving her a sidebar from the rest of the imaginary audience. "Usually I'm not one for American cars, I mean, what's the point? Where's the fun in that, right?"
"Right." Rory agreed having no idea what he was talking about. Finn turned to face the imaginary audience yet again and fell back into character.
"Then one day, it was a Tuesday, I remember this and I was still upset because I had a dream that I was driving my car to my uncle Keith's, we were going to have a day at the beach. Anyway, my dad calls me and in the process wakes me up from my dream. I stumble out of bed and search for clothes, because normally I sleep in nothing but me skivvies: Boxers. I find pants and drag myself down there depressed because I don't have a car. My dad's outside, I find and go to look for him…And there she was, the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
"What?" Rory was down right giddy, Finn's expression was contagious.
"A 1965 Shelby Cobra GT, I almost cried when he told me it was mine. Come to think of it, I might have. It's a beautiful car—I still have it, down in Australia of course. I can't trust you damned Americans."
"I'm offended. You're knocking my country I should have you deported, I'll call immigration, or national security or my President!"
"Okay, but first, tell me that you've never been guilty of a crash moment, racist or not." Rory thought for a second and huffed, her first visit to New York on her own a homeless guy began walking in her direction and she was scared, but that could happen anywhere.
"Fine I won't call Mister George-y boy but tell me that no one's ever been mugged in Australia."
"I've never been, but I never said no one has, I simply don't trust Americans, except maybe myself." Finn said smuggly
"What?"
"I was born in America, raised in Australia, I never told you that?"
"No."
"So I'm sure that will make deporting me a tad bit more difficult."
"Not really, I know people." Rory said simply before walking away. "Are you hungry? I'm starving." Rory picked up the phone and ordered room service fit for a queen, or rather a very hungry and drunk Gilmore. Four plates of Fries, Buffalo wings, Mozzarella sticks, a Thai pasta dish that tasted like peanut butter, and 2 ice cream floats later Rory and Finn collapsed against each other.
Finn took a deep breath before he spoke. "You can eat."
"Me? I almost pasted out half-way through 'nutter-pasta', but you kept going. I felt challenged." They shared a laugh before looking to the last dish on the table.
"I can take a bite if you can love." Finn challenged officially, his eye not leaving the coconut banana cream cake still lingering to haunt him.
"Same time, love." Rory said narrowing her eyes at the delicate dessert in front of her. They both raised their forks and licked them clean of peanut butter.
"Ready."
"Set."
"Eat!" They screamed simultaneously attacking the table rather than the cake. Finn got the first bite, followed by Rory at a close second. They melted into the butter banana creaminess and landed with faint grins on their faces. Finn moaned deeply in pleasure and Rory licked her lips slowly savoring the taste. They were both very aware of the other's actions. Rory gasped shortly as Finn's thumb traced her arm. Subconsciously she squirmed closer to him. They sat together intimately despite the vast amount of room on the couch. Rory raised her hand to his chest and rested her head on his shoulder. They were just sitting, unnecessarily close, yes, but just sitting they were. The television had been on this entire time and during long silences they averted their eyes to the moving characters. They stared mindlessly at the television unaware of anything that happened in the movie they were watching.
Finn traced slow circles on her arm and rested his head lightly over hers. Rory grazed her thumb over his chest. He was beginning to feel a little too happy, but happily he was drunk, so his blood ran slower. He decided to feel more comfortable and slumped down lower. "Love?" But she was sleeping. He picked her up just married style and brought her to her room. He laid her down gently and kissed her forehead.
"Finn?" Rory said waking.
"Yes love?"
"Will you take me with you?" She asked finding his eyes.
"Where love?"
"Home."
"Sure, we'll go in the morning." Finn said moving the blanket from under her.
"No, not Connecticut, Australia, will you take me with you?" Rory sat up slightly from her fully reclined position. Their faces just inches apart, Finn moved in closer.
"Sure love. Anytime."
"Promise?" She smiled drunkenly.
"I promise love." Finn whispered, the breath from his every word hit her lips. She raised her hands to his cheek and brought their faces closer, their foreheads touched and they smiled to one another. I love the way you look at me.
The alcohol must have loosened her tongue because Finn responded. "I love to look at you."
"And I love your voice."
"This old thing?" He purred gravelly
"Yeah, that thing." Normally being this drunk at this point in the evening would frustrate him, piss him off, and he would curse himself for drinking so much. But in this situation he was glad for alcohol's sexually limiting side effects, because it would now be his turn to do something stupid involving sex…and his best friend's girlfriend. Finn moaned deeply over her and her fingers traced his lips as they parted. How she wanted to kiss him, make him make that sound again, because of her. He straddled her and inhaled as she exhaled. Her air left his mouth and rolled from her jaw to her neck. He inhaled and she exhaled yet again, her chest rising closer to his lips. He resisted the urge to let his lips touch her skin; he resisted the urge to pass his tongue over her clavicle, up her neck to her jawline and seeking refuge in her mouth. And she resisted him, every bit of him, if she gave in to the feeling of his strong arms holding his body just over hers, his powerful thighs keeping her together, or his intense gaze over her body, she would explode into him even without physical contact. The sexual tension alone would send her over the edge. She wasn't even sure if it could still be called 'tension', it was more powerful with less friction. They were attracted, like electromagnetism. Sexual electromagnetism, but they were opposite poles and could not touch.
Rory moaned loudly causing the tension to build further. The room was filled with hot air from their breath and body heat. Finn panted, it was taking all of him not to collapse atop of her. How it was killing him.
"Fuck." He panted and she took in a short breath at the sound of his voice a chill ran up her spine. She arched her back subconsciously, their bodies making contact for the first time. She touched his face; she was sending him over the edge. It was only because of Logan this was so intense, it was only because of Logan this was even happening.
"Finn." She exhaled.
"Yes love?" He asked distractedly
"I think—I'm going—to—explode." She gasped.
"You have no idea."
natasha's note: that seems like a good ending to me.