En Dessous

Summary: It was not the fact that Kakashi was blinking that alarmed Asuma. It was the matter in which he was blinking.

Genre: Angst/Drama (I think?)

Rating: K

Author Notes: Who's excited for the fillers to end? I know I am! Feb. 15th people! I'm SO EXCITED!

Disclaimer: Me not own.

Please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors.

Please R&R…Thanks!

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Kakashi blinked. To the average person it would be an action not otherwise noticed for blinking, in itself, is not a strange pastime for one to partake in. But to the ones that have found themselves within the protective barrier that Hatake Kakashi has built up over the years they have learned to distinguish small, otherwise unnoticed, actions as ones of particularly strong importance.

It was not the fact that Kakashi was blinking that alarmed Asuma. It was the matter in which he was blinking.

It was also what he was blinking at – a half-drained glass of sake that had probably been refilled many times over by now – that alarmed Asuma.

So Asuma sat down in the seat opposite Kakashi, knowing he couldn't leave his friend alone right now, and lit a cigarette. He immediately noticed the lack of protest on Kakashi's part for the man almost always asks him to not smoke.

The Hokage's son watched his friend in quiet concern. Noticing the rapid speed in which he was blinking, the lack of his infamous orange book, the fact his hitaiate has seemed to have disappeared – yet again – and how he never even noticed Asuma's presence.

"Kakashi?" Asuma finally dared to ask. He figured the fact that his friend had not even bothered to change out of his blood-stained clothes meant he seriously needed someone to talk too – or at least make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

"She almost died," he mutters as he spins his glass and watches the sake within twirl around with half-lidded eyes. "And she won't blame me – of course."

"Of course," Asuma replies, unsure of what to make of this startling revelation. Very few people almost die when they're under the leadership of Hatake Kakashi.

"I had to perform a medical ninjutsu – the only one I know – to save her life," the silver-haired shinobi continues, "And you know how incompetent I am with medical ninjutsus."

"Hmm," Sarutobi's son responds as he quietly takes the glass from his friend's now shaking hands.

"And she's suppose to be the medic-nin."

Asuma watches as Kakashi twists his hands together in a frantic, nervous action meant to distract himself from his emotional torment. The Jounin allows his brown eyes to be drawn upward to once again notice the fast pace at which his friend is blinking.

He's learnt over the years that when Kakashi is blinking this fast it almost always means that he's desperately trying to stop the tears that he can't let escape. After all, he's Hatake Kakashi – he's not suppose to cry. He has an image to keep up, no matter what.

"It was my mistake," Kakashi mutters, more to himself then to the one sitting opposite him.

"Mistake?" the friend questions. Unable to believe that Kakashi would make a mistake that would lead to the almost death of one under his care.

"A miscalculation from the scout," the red and black-eyed Jounin clarifies. "But my mistake for trusting a rookie scout."

Asuma nods even though he knows Kakashi probably can't see him through his downcast, drunken-hazed eyesight.

"She'll probably put the blame on herself when she wakes up." His hands stop their frantic twisting and return to lying listless on the table.

"Is that so?" Asuma replies as he takes a sniff of the drink he took from his friend earlier. He notices the smell and determines that Kakashi has been drinking some very strong sake this night.

"I don't know why Tsunade keeps putting me on these team missions – I'm a far better soloist." Kakashi rubs his tired and sore Sharingan with his left hand and then continues, "Less pressure in solo missions. No one else's life to worry about."

"She's going to live Kakashi – this isn't the end of the world," Asuma states as he motions for the waitress to bring over the bill.

"I know," Kakashi's hands return to their frantic twisting, "The thing is – she almost died to save me."

"If you want to spend the next few days wallowing in self-pity I won't stop you."

"I don't." The Jounin lifts his head so his mismatched eyes meet his friends brown ones, "Just tonight."