For Splats cause I miss her already! X
Remembered (part 2)
Kat
Oh God I miss him.
My life almost feels empty without him, I find myself looking for something that isn't there, I'll turn expecting to see him and I want to talk to him all the time.
Jason came back. He doesn't replace Tommy though, he can't and he never will but he's the greatest friend I've known. He won't give up.
Tanya often comes around with Adam but it's no good, it's not the same as it used to be because now we're an odd number and there's always that unspoken acknowledgement that he isn't there.
I feel useless as I watch Jason come back every time empty handed, he tells me that there's good news, that a clue leads somewhere else. A sighting of Tommy here, a rumor there; but they're insubstantial, he's never there and the rumors are never true.
Jason looks tired but he never rests, he'll come back late one evening but when I wake up he's gone again. He looks like he's slowly dying; I look in the mirror and wonder whether I look the same. Rocky's using his connections in the police in case Tommy is being hidden on Earth. Other Ranger teams have contacted us and wanted to help; Eric and Wes are two that come to mind, they said they have good connections; I don't quite understand but apparently they're from the future. I tried asking whether Tommy was there in the future, whether we found him but they say that it's not how time works, besides a thousand years from now Tommy isn't around.
We got a message from space too from a Ranger named Andros; he's using his ship to search the galaxies. Andros is almost as intense as Jason; they both take responsibility and loyalty seriously, but then something tells me Andros has had a hard life.
I stopped crying a while ago. It didn't help, and I never felt any better; my mother always used to say a good cry would do that, not anymore. I go every other day to the Command Centre and watch a newly rebooted Alpha initiate scans and listen to Zordon tell me everything will be okay. Alpha tells me that there should be a homing device on Tommy's morpher and communicator, he keeps looking for the signal but it seems pointless to me; no doubt whoever has him has disabled it.
Jason tries to be optimistic for me, he tells me about new leads and positive sightings but I know he's exaggerating and at times just lying. I don't blame him but I can see right through it; there's a strain in his smile and a bleak look in his eyes.
He laughs and tells me that Tommy is probably on a beach on some distant planet having the time of his life. But it's just a lie; just a comfort for me and it's all fake. I know he's in trouble I can feel it.
Jason came back for the Gold Ranger powers but he left again when they failed, he never saw Tommy juggle normal life, Rangering and secret missions and it seems like now he's trying to make up for not being there for Tommy; for his brother.
I have to keep holding on. I have to keep searching for him; I can't just give up on him he would never have given up on me or anyone else for that matter. I have to believe that I'll see him again because if I don't I'm not sure how I will pass the days, I'll go insane but I have to wait for him to come back the way he would have waited for me.
I love him. I won't ever stop loving him; I have to believe he's alive.