A/N:
Sorry for the wait, the cliffhanger, and my unbearable procrastination.
Disclaimer: Don't make me say it again.
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Gunshot…a sharp intake of breath…a disappointed sigh…
All went as he expected; she stood across the way with her eyes closed tightly, no bullets missing from her pistol. Still holding her breath, she opened her eyes, only to somehow realize what she held in her hand. In an instant, she dropped the gun, a terrified look on her face. Feeling like the breath had been knocked from her, she struggled to keep a steady flow of air to her lungs. Still, as expected, she took a few steps back from where she dropped her gun, and suddenly looked up at him.
His arm still straight, and the gun still aimed, he remained emotionless. There was no reaction shown on his face from what had just happened except disappointment. He cast his gaze to the ground, glaring at it. With another disappointed sigh, he lowered the gun until his arm hung at his side. It took Sora a moment to realize what had happened. He was a good shot –better than most, yet she stood there unscathed. She did not fire, and for reasons that just now rose to the surface of her mind.
The confusion grew with each passing second. It was as plain as day to her –even if she didn't know the reason behind it. He had clearly missed. The metal wall, so to speak, now bore the burn mark of the bullet. And, because of its motion, the mark was at least a few more yards away.
"You didn't shoot." Grant stated plainly, but somehow expecting an answer.
So, she gave it to him. "I couldn't." He didn't even look up at her when she spoke. It would've been an easy shot –and she knew that as well as he did. She could've killed him with the aim she had been born with… but she didn't. And now, it seemed he wanted to know why.
She continued. "I- We used to care about each other so much…" He lifted his head at the reference. "…and even though that changed, you're- you're still my friend." She swallowed once, but still had trouble getting this out. "Look what's happened." She whispered disappointedly, gesturing. "What's become of us? We're acting like enemies… I don't want that." The silence consumed the moment as she waited for a reply.
But that reply never came. With her words on his heart, a look of realization came over his face, but only for a moment. They seemed to have no affect whatsoever, for, again, his faced returned to an emotionless state. And then, he threw away his gun as if he no longer cared. About anything.
With a look full of the worst kind of apathy, he ran his fingers through his silver hair. Rolling his eyes, his expression changed to that of frustration. "…Bloody hell!" He whispered angrily at the ground. Though he didn't show it, Sora could see the shock in his eyes, and would've given anything to know his thoughts at the moment.
He had almost killed her –Sora! The girl he had known for the last three or four years… and he had almost killed her. He stumbled back a few steps, only causing her look of confusion to grow. She didn't understand; Why was he suddenly acting like this? It almost seemed like he was regretting this…
Her thoughts where shattered when the ground shook and she was sent to her knees. When she brought her gaze up, she saw the large crack in the ground, running across the entire block –directly under Grants boots. He looked down, also, but with an unconcerned face. He merely took a step back, glancing towards his left, where the portal shimmered off in the distance. Then, looking towards Sora where he could almost see the bow of the Legacy just past the metal wall, he took another step back. After only a few seconds the block tore in half, the smaller half floating away.
Sora was on her feet in an instant. Running all the way to the edge where he had once stood, she was stopped when a hot gust of wind, filled with glowing embers, came up from below the block. With a small gasp, she covered her face with her arms. When the heat faded, she looked to where she thought he would be, but saw nothing but the smoke that was concealing the block he stood on. "Grant!" Calling out didn't help –he was gone.
Running a hand through her hair, she cursed loudly. And, as she closed her eyes, she tried shutting out the world around her, though it was near impossible. It was hard to grasp reality; Had that really happened? Had he really chosen his fate so quickly after fighting for it countless times?
She felt the heat of the deadly fires below, and she could hear someone calling her name from the deck of the Legacy; she could no longer deny the fact this was not a dream.
Then why did this all feel like a terrible nightmare?
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She was just standing there.
As the Legacy pulled around the heavy debris, the view of the block became clear, as did the one individual who was still standing on it. Even after calling out her name, she did not respond. Her face was terribly pale with recent shock, and she seemed on the verge of tears –but it was well known that she wouldn't give in to nonsense like that.
"Sora!" Still, after calling out her name once more, she didn't even seem to notice him. Jim watched her, silently cursing himself for not letting her stay with him on Flint's ship. Somehow, he knew it would've played out differently… and she wouldn't be like this, now.
Suddenly, she looked up, no surprise showing on her face when she caught sight of the ship. She glanced at him with a stoic face, holding back whatever emotion would have naturally been on her face. After a few moments, the ship came alongside the block, and she quickly walked forward. With a steady grip on a rope from the shrouds, she stepped onto the railing. She glanced back over her shoulder, surveying the fires erupting past the edges of the blocks.
The minute her shoes touched the deck, she somehow felt like she was safe –a feeling that was a bit foreign to her. The shock of what had just happened hadn't gone away yet, and probably wouldn't for a long time. She leaned against the railing, trying to catch her breath and stay focused on what was happening in the present. Looking up, she saw Silver smile as he walked over, B.E.N.'s awkward grin and Amelia and Doppler's faces when they saw her. She could tell she was a bit unwanted for so many obvious reasons. She also didn't care, much, since she'd take prison rather than dying any day.
"Are you okay?" Jim's voice brought her back from her racing thoughts.
She looked over at him. "Fine." She answered just as Silver joined them.
"Where's Grant?" He asked, though she could tell he didn't want to.
She tried to answer, but found she couldn't. At least, not now. Instead, she merely shook her head in an attempt to get the point across; He's dead. Silver nodded in understanding and headed up the stairs to the helm.
Jim watched her face, knowing she wouldn't want to explain what had happened. The sadness showed in her eyes quite clearly, though it was evident that she was trying to hide it. In truth, Jim almost hated the man. But, he could see how terribly shaken up she was about it, yet he was having a hard time trying to sympathize.
"Come on," He said quietly, holding out a hand. She stared down at the ground for a moment, still keeping the same grim look she had when she boarded the ship. After a second, she took his hand and they started to walk towards the stairs.
Yet, before they could get there, a loud cracking sound filled the air. All eyes looked to the top of one of the masts, where a large heap of metal had smashed against the wood, tearing the sails in the process. Bits of the mast came down quickly, one large piece crushing one of the cannons. Jim and Sora jumped back as shrapnel littered the deck, both trying to catch their breath.
And, if that hadn't been startling enough, the words spoken next were even more so.
"Missile tail demobilized, Captain," B.E.N. informed Amelia while typing away steadily at the helm. "Thrusters at only thirty-percent of capacity." His words struck those aboard quickly.
"Thirty-percent?" Doppler repeated, as if to confirm what he had heard. "That means we're- we'll never clear the planet's explosion in time."
A solemn moment passed over the deck, and an invisible cloud of doubts-fulfilled hung over them. Sora shook her head in disbelief. After all they had gone through to get this far… would it rally end this quickly? Jim, his head filled with similar thoughts, kept his gaze fixed on the portal. An idea sparked, but the flaws soon became evident.
"But what about the portal?" Jim asked. "Can't we just use that?"
Doppler, of course, was the first to respond. "Pardon me, Jim," Starting in a calm tone, his voice grew loud with each word. "But didn't that portal open onto a raging inferno?"
"Well, yes." Jim said. "But there has to be a way to change it, right?" He knew the portal was at least a half mile away by now, and with minutes left and no clear way to get there, his hopes seemed crushed.
Silver glanced back at the portal, noticing something strange. His robotic eyes zoomed in on it, to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.
B.E.N., meanwhile, had spoken up. "Um, this is a nice idea and all, but, uh… we've got a problem." When everyone looked up at him all at once he shrunk back a bit, almost as if he was embarrassed. "Uh, well, you see- It seems the portal is… malfunctioning." He finished, pointing towards it.
Indeed, when every eye turned towards their only means of escape, they saw that a different door had been opened. Only a second passed before a different door appeared, though no one had touched the map.
"Flint knew that when the planet was set for destruction, the map would go along with it. But, since he didn't actually build it, he never thought it could last this long." B.E.N. continued. "It was built by some ancient race, and it seems it was stronger than last thought. If it's lasted this long, it should stay long enough for us to get over there… but…"
"Spit it out, B.E.N." Sora said suddenly, but not very rudely. She looked over at the portal, which was violently changing now, before speaking again. "What is it?"
The robot coughed nervously. "Well, if a new door is pressed manually, then I suppose it would stay open long enough for us to get completely through. But, if not… um." Everyone exchanged nervous glances. "I don't want to think about it, really."
"So all we need to do is pick one of the places on the map –from down there." Jim confirmed. B.E.N. nodded, still in his nervous state.
"Sounds like a plan." He said with joking confidence as a far-fetched idea sprang up after he looked over on the deck where the plasma cannon had been broken to bits. It was near impossible, but as he did the quick calculations in his head, he realized it just might work. If a solar surfer engine and the canon are built from similar components… His thoughts raced as he climbed down the stairs, hurriedly.
"What?" Sora asked, a completely confused look on her face.
"I'll just go down there and pick out a destination." He said, not looking over his shoulder, with a tone that made him seem like he thought nothing of it.
"And how do you propose to get down there in the first place?" She followed him, doubting every inch of his plan.
He remained silent for a moment, pulling over a part of the shell of the cannon. After setting it down on the deck, he hauled another part of the cannon on top of it. It was a piece of the inter-mechanism, and judging from the three small canisters inside of it, she guessed it caused the propulsion that made the cannon shoot. It was then that she realized he was building a crude solar surfer –well, just some kind of surfer.
He looked over at her for a second with a grin. "This should work."
Doppler shot the Captain a nervous glance. "Captain, really, I just don't see how this could possibly-"
"Listen to the boy!" Silver suddenly snapped at the Doctor. He headed down the stairs to the deck where Jim was trying to attach the make-shift engine to the strip of metal with a length of rope.
"What do you need, Jim?" On one knee, he surveyed what the boy had made.
"Just some way to attach this." He replied, trying to tie the rope.
"Alright, stand back." Silver said, his robotic arm changing to a small torch. "Stand back now." He finished as he welded the two pieces together. Sora and Jim both stepped back quickly avoiding the sparks.
When he was done, he helped Jim lift the surfer onto the railing, where it balanced there for a moment. "There you go." Silver murmured as he lifted it.
"There you go." Mimicked Morph.
Once Jim found his footing on the board, he looked to Silver. "Ok, now, no matter what happens keep the ship heading straight for that portal." He said in all seriousness.
"Fifty-eight seconds!" B.E.N. called out in the background.
Silver's face showed his concern for the boy, but he said nothing. Jim glanced over at Sora for only a moment before kicking the small lever on the engine and propelling forward, knowing that if it were a second longer, he wouldn't be able to go.
Sora watched as his form grew smaller the farther he got. She nearly jumped when Silver shouted up to the helm.
"Well, you heard him. Get this blasted heap turned around!" He commanded.
Captain Amelia looked a bit shocked when one of the mutinous crew gave an order, but, nonetheless, she couldn't object. "Doctor, head us back to the portal." She said to Doppler.
The man paused before complying. "Aye, Captain." He said as he turned the wheel.
Still looking over the side, Sora couldn't help but feel frustrated with Jim. He had to be completely insane to do this! Whether she was trying to hide her worries or not, she felt they could've at least tried to find a way out of this that didn't include him risking his life.
Across the broken surface of the planet, it took Jim a few seconds to get the hang of the winds rising from the core. The board lurched one way and then the other, but he quickly adapted to the rough currents of wind.
He could feel the scorching fires not far beneath him, but he tried to keep his focus on the finish line- the portal. It was in human nature to slow down before the finish line in any race, against time or not, and he would have to keep his speed up in order to not lose time. After all, time wasn't really on his side for the moment.
Swerving a large block floating in front of him, he quickly got back on course. Pieces of metal and shrapnel littered the skies and he tilted the board so as to zigzag around them. Suddenly, he found he was losing speed and altitude, and kicked the lever at the back of the engine, using another canister to propel the board farther.
In his mind, he pictured the ship behind him, but was afraid of looking back because of all the obstacles. Without warning, a piece of metal seemed to shoot out of the air right into his path. Shifting his weight on the board, he managed not to collide with it, and, instead, let the board grind of the surface before pulling it away again.
The Legacy, only a dozen yards behind him, scraped the side of a block loudly, sparks shooting at angles from the impact. "To the right," Amelia shouted at the helm to Doppler. "The right!"
"I know!" Doppler snapped. "I know! Will you just let me drive?" Finishing, he pulled the wheel violently to the right.
"Twenty-five seconds!" B.E.N. shouted over the madness.
Narrowly missing another block, the board Jim rode on suddenly gave out once more. He was losing altitude fast, and had to get it back up again before the thing flew over a large crevasse only a few yards in front of him. But, when he tried to start the engine again, it wouldn't work. He kicked the lever again but to no avail.
"No!" He muttered, kicking it again as the surfer glided down over the crevasse and then lost any momentum it had and hurtling downward. "No!" He yelled, trying once more to start the engine as he fell deeper and deeper towards the fiery core below.
On the deck of the ship, Silver muttered under his breath. "Come on, lad." He said through clenched teeth.
Biting her lip, Sora leaned over the side, but could not see him anymore. Murmuring various oaths, she wished for nothing more than the chance to see him again.
Again, he kicked the lever, shouting once more. It obviously was not going to work, but what else was he supposed to do? He had to think fast, yet it was hard knowing your death lay only about a hundred feet beneath you.
Then, he mind took hold of a thought. All the engine needed was a spark. With this he shifted his weight to the back of the board and swung it around. The engine's back screeched terribly as it made contact with the wall of the crevasse.
It did not stop his descent by much, but, after a moment, sparks showered down upon the wall. And then, as he felt the heat of the fires below increase, the board suddenly rocketed upward. As he neared the opening of the crevasse, the Legacy's hull flew over him. Pulling the board, it swerved to fly perpendicular to the ship, gaining speed as he neared the small, glowing map.
Its green light was a beacon, easy to see amidst the orange and red glow of the area. From the helm, B.E.N. started counting down. "Seven… six… five…" Jim heard his voice grow more nervous with each second.
The map was close, very close and he knew he only had to press one destination to save their lives.
"…Four… three…" The map was only a few feet away- "…Two…" The bow of the Legacy was only a few feet away from the portal's changing surface when he stretched out a hand to the map. And, just as he felt his fingers touch the small green crescent, the world was thrown into darkness.
Everything was dead silent.
It lasted for only a moment, but it made everyone's thoughts jump to the possibility they hadn't made it. Then, in a bright, multicolored flash of light, the spaceport seemed to burst in front of their eyes. The shining crescent, against the blue backdrop of stars, was possibly the most reassuring, and beautiful, sight they could've seen at that moment.
"Yes!" Jim shouted, punching a fist into the air. He couldn't help but laugh at his momentary doubts when they passed through the portal.
Still keeping his balance, he glanced at the Legacy's deck, where he could see the smiling and relieved faces of all his friends. He brought the board around to one side of the ship, and as he flew across the deck, he high-fived Silver. "Didn't I say the lad had greatness in him?" Silver asked no one in particular, a proud look on his face. Morph, chirping happily, turned into some small fireworks in celebration.
Sora ran over to the side as he let the board grind on the railing. Then, as he jumped off, what once was part of the cannon fell away into the etherium, joining the other debris from the explosion.
He jumped onto the deck loudly, grateful enough to have landed on some steady ground. After he caught his breath, he looked up to see Sora standing before him, arms crossed over her chest, with a look that shouted 'What were you thinking?' She looked almost angry, but then a smile spread across her face and she spoke. "Well, I guess you're not a total screw-up after all, Hawkins."
He smiled back at her and shrugged his shoulders. "And you're just figuring this out now?"
"Maybe." She said with a small laugh as she hugged him.
Of course, she caught him off guard and he nearly stumbled back. But, returning the laugh, he held her tightly, knowing she'd step away in only a second in embarrassment. "Don't ever scare me like that again." She whispered as she heard footsteps coming down the stairs from the helm.
"'Course not." He answered before anyone was close enough to hear them.
They let go of one another, both blushing, just as Morph came up and started licking Jim's face. "Ah! Morph, quit!" He tried catching the shape-shifter in his hands, but to no avail. Sora stepped back when the Captain and Doppler came up to talk to Jim. It was then that she remembered Silver, and started wondering where he had gotten off too. After a moment, she figured it out and, with a saddened sigh, she left.
Meanwhile, Captain Amelia had started speaking. "Unorthodox, but ludicrously effective." She complimented. "I'd be proud to recommend you to the interstellar academy. They could use a man like you." She finished with a polite smile.
"Just wait until you mother hears about this!" Doppler exclaimed before realizing what he said. "Of course, we may downplay the life-threatening parts."
Jim nodded in agreement when B.E.N. ran up to him, and, surprisingly, didn't hug him right away. "Jimmy, that was… unforgettable!" The robot shouted. "I know you don't like touching… but get ready for a hug, big guy, 'cause I gotta hug ya!" Through what felt like a bone-crushing blow, Jim was surprised he could ever survive one of B.E.N.'s hugs –but, hugged his friend back anyway. "Hey, you hugged me back… Oh, I promised myself I wouldn't cry…" He said as he began to sob hysterically, one arm around his shoulder. Jim shook his head at him, but couldn't help his laughter.
He looked over to where Silver had stood only moments before –but he was gone. And, it didn't surprise him that Sora was gone, too.
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When she had turned around, he was gone.
Same old Silver, she noted as she walked down the dimly lit hallway. Naturally, she went to look for him, already knowing exactly where he was. Opening the door to the longboat bay, her thoughts were confirmed when she saw him.
"Not going to say goodbye to him?" She asked from behind him, causing him to jump.
When he turned around, there was a sad grin on his face. "Only if it means outrunnin' the authorities."
They fell into silence as Silver got the longboat ready to launch. Looking down at her feet, she thrust her hands into her coat pockets. It suddenly felt terrible, leaving without saying goodbye. But, it wasn't as if either of them had much choice. Silver would go to prison if he stayed any longer, and though Sora wasn't old enough to go to prison, she was almost sixteen –and after that they'd share the same fate.
Sliding a hand along the edge of the longboat, she spoke quietly. "You've really changed something in him." She had noticed something different about Jim as he jumped back onto the deck after saving all their necks. She couldn't help but smile, remembering how… happy he looked.
Silver stopped his work for a moment, shaking his head. "Not really," He stated. "Just showed him what he forgot."
Sora looked up at him. "And what was that?" She asked, curiously.
"Everyone's got a future," He said as if it were common knowledge. "Just depends on how you get there, I guess."
She didn't question further, only cast her gaze away again. Silver had once tried to show her that- but she supposed Jim was a better listener than she was. When they had first met, Silver had never meant for her to throw away her future, but try as he might, she had always thought that there was nothing for herself on Mardella or even Proteus 1. Only now did she fully realize what she had been blind to, what she had missed. She could have tried harder in finding where she belonged. But, she took what was easiest and right in front of her at the time.
She had thrown away her future like Jim almost had done. But, for her, there was no going back –she was already in too deep. Still, she wished she still had the chance to choose her own future-
Morph started squeaking, a worried look on his face, probably because he just figured out they were leaving. "Sorry, Morphy. But, we gotta make tracks." Silver said as he went to work on the rope holding the longboat.
"You never quit, do you?" A voice asked, almost dissapointedly, from the other side of the longboat bay. The voice was recognized by both, and, just as suspected, Jim walked over from the doorway, arms crossed.
"Ah, Jimbo!" Silver exclaimed with a nervous laugh. "I was just checking to make sure…" Pausing, he tied the rope holding the longboat back down. "…our last longboat was safe, and secure."
Jim raised an eyebrow as he walked over to him and re-tied the sloppy knot the man had made. "Hmm, well, that should hold it." He said, standing once more.
With a smile, Silver chuckled. "I taught you too well." As Jim's face became serious, so did his. "If you don't mind, we'd just as soon avoid prison. Little Morphy here, he's…" At the sound of his name, Morph flew a few circles around Silver's hand as he held it up. "He's a free spirit." Silver then caught the pink blob in his robotic hand, trapping him. "Being in a cage, it'd break his heart."
The young man looked back at the big eyes staring at him from behind Silver's fingers as if they were bars in a jail cell. A moment later, the lever controlling the longboat bay door was switched, and the orange light filled the room. Silver took one look at the view beneath the platform before a smile spread across his face, only to be mirrored in the boy standing next to him.
"What say you ship out with us, lad?" Silver asked, placing a hand on Jim's shoulder, and puzzling Sora beyond belief. But, after he finished speaking, she could tell he was testing the young lad to see if he had, indeed, learned something from him. "You and me, Hawkins and Silver, full of ourselves and no ties to anyone!" He finished, gesturing.
Morph turned into a captain's hat and sat atop his head for added affect. Jim smiled up at the shape-shifter with a thoughtful look on his face before taking off the 'hat'. "You know, when I got on this boat… I would've taken you up on that offer in a second." Sora wondered what his answer would be, hoping he'd make the right choice, but not being able to help the thought of spending more time with him.
"But," He said as Morph changed back into his regular self. "Uh, I met this old cyborg…" He kept his gaze away from them both. "And he taught me that I could chart my own course. That's what I'm gonna do." He said with an undoubting look upon his face.
Silver took a deep breath before speaking. "And what do you see… off that bow of yours?"
His thoughts raced in his mind, and he remembered all those times his mother had told him not to throw away his entire future by acting the way he did. After a moment, he looked up with a smile on his face. "A future." He answered.
The man chuckled at his response with a grin. "Why… look at ya, glowing like a solar fire." He said with admiration. "You're something special, Jim. You're gonna rattle the stars, you are."
As she watched them, she could see something in Silver's eyes. He was really proud of the boy. She supposed Silver had acted as a father-figure for both of them… And, seeing him go would've been hard for her too, so she wasn't at all surprised when the two friends embraced one another. A smile crept across her face without her realization. There was no denying the fact that there was something different about Jim. She supposed something Silver had said had gotten through to him.
Rolling her eyes, she forced a fake cough. Silver backed up a bit, wiping at his eye and clearing his throat. "Got a bit of grease in this cyborg eye of mine." He coughed.
Jim took a deep breath, also wiping away a tear he tried to hide. Morph looked back and forth from the two of them and started sobbing. Then he dissolved into a puddle of tears, falling into Jim's hands as the young man spoke. "Oh, hey, Morph. I'll see ya around, Ok?" He finished, trying to coax a smile out of the little shape-shifter.
"See ya around." Morph mimicked in a squeaky voice when he changed back, sniffing sadly at the same time. After nuzzling up against his cheek, Morph flew back to Silver with a saddened look.
Silver glanced towards Morph, sympathetically before taking a deep breath. "Morphy, I got a job for ya." He said difficultly. "I need you to keep an eye on this here pup." They both looked towards the young man standing before them.
It was evident that Silver tried keeping a straight face, but was having a hard time doing so. "Will ya do me… that little favor?" He asked the shape-shifter.
In response, Morph rubbed up against the pirate's cheek in farewell and zipped across the room. Though still in a bit of shock, Jim smiled as Morph flew circles around his head. The pink blob then headed over to say goodbye to Sora, but she held up a hand to stop him as she stood up.
"No need." She stated with the smallest of smiles upon her pale features. "I'm gonna sit this one out, Silver." He raised an eyebrow at her, but a smile returned to his face a moment later. "I think I've had enough adventure for a lifetime."
He chuckled softly, as she walked over and hugged him quickly. Stepping back a bit, she could just see the smile on Jim's face out of the corner of her eye.
"And Sora," He said after getting in the lowering longboat. "Behave." He smirked up at her.
"Sure thing." She answered sarcastically, rolling her eyes.
"Oh, and one more thing, Here's for your dear mother." He addressed Jim, throwing up a small pile of jewels and coins from his coat pocket. "To rebuild that inn of hers."
Jim smiled and slipped it into his pocket. "Stay out of trouble." He said with a smirk. "Ya old scalawag."
Silver chuckled just as the longboat dropped from the line." Why, Jimbo, lad, When have I ever done otherwise?" The longboat drove forward steadily now, as Silver took to the controls, a grin still on his face.
Jim and Sora stood side by side, watching until they couldn't see him anymore. It was silent for a moment before she took a deep breath. "So, how long, do you bet, until we see his face on a wanted poster?" She asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.
"A week?" He guessed with a laugh.
She raised an eyebrow. "A week?" She asked, walking behind him towards the door. "I'd give him until sun down."
He smiled, not really sure if she was joking or not. But, when he turned around, she had already left.
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Jim stepped onto the deck, with Morph trailing behind him. Where had she gone? Looking past the deck and over to the docks, he could see Doppler and Amelia talking to two cops. Doubtless, it was over the pirates in the cargo hold, but he suddenly realized why Sora had disappeared. She was going to run. Again.
And he knew exactly where she'd be, now.
In an instant he was heading down the stairs to the crew's quarters. He stopped when he reached the bottom, realizing the girl across the room hadn't noticed he was there. With her back to him, she took off her coat and draped it over her hammock. He could clearly see the rips and tears in her cotton shirt, and the cuts beneath them. She grabbed her bag and just when he thought she would turn around, she stopped.
Without warning she let the bag fall to the floor, and, crossing her arms once more, she leaned against one of the poles. Jim took a step towards her, concern written across his face.
"Sora?" He whispered.
As soon as she heard his voice, she stood straight but didn't turn to him. He could see her wipe her eyes and take a few deep breathes.
"What?" She asked in a shaky voice, still not turning to him.
He sighed. "You're leaving, aren't you?" It was pointless to ask, for he already knew the answer.
"I don't really have any other choice, do I?" She leaned down and took her bag again and quickly tried to walk past him, without letting him see her face.
"Why didn't you go with Silver if you were just going to leave again?" He asked suddenly.
She stopped and looked him straight in the eye. "Because…" Her voice trailed off for a moment before she looked at him again. "… I've made mistakes before, but that doesn't mean I have to keep it up." Her face gave away the sadness she felt. "I don't want to be a thief; I don't want to be a pirate; I don't want any of it anymore. It doesn't mean I'll ever get to live a normal life, but…"
Sighing, she turned around towards the stair again. "But, it does mean I'll get the chance to do something right, for once." She climbed the stairs quickly, leaving him behind her.
He stood there for a moment, thinking over her words. He knew she wanted a way out of this –out of all the mistakes she had made. But, there wasn't one. It was terrible, and though he'd never know what that feels like, he still wanted to help her… there had to be some way to help her…
Yet, even if he couldn't find a way, he knew he didn't want that to be goodbye; He didn't want that to be the last time he saw her.
By the time he reached the deck, she was gone. He ran out onto the dock, but quickly realized he couldn't call out her name. The Captain and Doc were still talking to the officers, and how Sora had gotten past them without being seen was a mystery to him. For a split second, he imagined he saw her walking in the crowd up ahead.
He didn't run after her. And he didn't call out her name. But he didn't give up on seeing her again. There was still a determination in him that what had just happened would not be their goodbye. It couldn't be.
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As midnight approached, the clock tower's bell sounded loudly across the sky. Within the streets of the spaceport, the only things still moving were the creaking ships as they tugged at their ropes and the old drunkards swaying in the darkened alleyways. It was a clear night, calmer in some districts than others. A particular damages ship lay at post near a safe section of the area; however, just north of this area was a neighborhood worse than most. The streets were left uncared for, and the lamps lighting the paths were left un-repaired. Here, the alleys were not only filled with trash, but the sound of drunken men and clinking glasses, floating from the bars and pubs up to the star-filled sky. It was here that one could be sure to see pirates walking down the streets without a care. It was here that was avoided even by the authorities, for unless ordered to, they would never stray near the place.
A lowly tavern filled with mutineers and thieves held no comfort for a young woman as she sat at the bar. The hood of her jacket concealed her face, her age, and the fact that she was, indeed, a woman. A bottle in her hand, and her eyes fixed blankly on the counter surface, not one thought crossed her mind. Though she had spent a good deal of time in places such as this, she felt uncomfortable. Behind her, the door of the pub opened, letting in a young man. Without hesitating, he sat down next to her and she sighed softly. Recognizing his presence, she knew he must have felt very out of place. Ignoring the mixed conversations of the crowded pub, she spoke first.
"Been searching all night, or do you always come here for a drink?" With an emotionless face, she took a drink as he laughed.
"I see your rude sarcasm hasn't failed you yet." He said with a small smile while folding his arms over the counter.
She averted her gaze from his, keeping the blank expression she was soon growing used to. "I don't know how I'd live without it." She finished in a monotone, feeling a bit concerned that she had been so easy to find.
He took a deep breath before turning to her. "Don't you think you're too young to be here?"
"Don't you think you're too good to be in this kind of neighborhood?" She retorted, looking across the room at the filthy men gambling or drinking at the many wooden tables. He raised an eyebrow at her before she reassured him. "Quit your worryin', there's no alcohol in it." She said, rolling her eyes.
Jim smiled, keeping down a small laugh. A silence passed between them; Sora could hardly stand it, for she knew sooner or later she would say something that would make him leave. But, he was content just knowing where she was. Closing her eyes, she listened to the many conversations in the background, the sound of clinking glasses, and the occasional shout from a cheated gambler. It was a few moments before she couldn't take it anymore.
"Why don't you just get it over with now." She said in a dull tone.
"What do you mean?" He asked.
"Aren't you going to convince me to come back or that everything's fine?"
Refraining from smiling once more, he kept a serious face. "Nope." His gaze wandered around the pub.
Her head shot up when he answered. "Really?" She asked with some actual emotion.
"Really." He shrugged his shoulders, his gaze still wandering.
She was about to say something more when she snapped her mouth shut. Realizing that he was going to ignore her so she'd talk to him, she remained silent. Thinks he's so smart… She thought as she fingered the bottle in her hands. It doesn't matter what he does… I'll still never act the way I should around him. Sighing in an irritated fashion, her only intent was for him to leave –at least before she yelled at him again. Though she wasn't facing him, she could feel his gaze even through her hood. "You're not going to leave, are you?" It was more of a statement than an actual question.
He said absolutely nothing for a moment –a moment where her own curiosity got the better of her. Just as he spoke, she looked over at him. "Do you want me to?" He asked.
No.
"Why should I care?" She countered.
Damn.
He looked back at her for a moment more before casting his gaze elsewhere. Though he tried not to show it, she knew she had hurt him. Again. He kept no expression on his face, looked down at the counter, and didn't say another word. She, too, said nothing, and a terrible silence fell upon them, leaving the two of them to their thoughts.
Jim had known her for a while. He, of all people, should have remembered she had a short temper and said rude things. It still surprised him, though. After all they had been through together… and still she acted like she felt nothing for him? Maybe she didn't –maybe it's just what he wanted, but wasn't actually true. When they had first met she had acted like she hated him, but things had gotten better, hadn't they? But, here she was again, acting like she hated everything about him. There was no end to the confusion in his mind caused by just one person. Now that he actually thought more about it, she was really the most confusing person he had ever met. Not to mention she could be terribly mean and harsh, sarcastic and rude, and the most temperamental woman in the universe.
Just knowing this made it hard for him to see why he loved her at all. But, it was still there. Though those things were true, he still strived for her attention and for her company –even if she was mad at him. He could see what others sometimes couldn't… but that may have been the reason she was even more reluctant to open up to him. After all, he seemed to be the only one who saw that she was still a good person, despite her past. And despite what her former comrades thought of her, he had never seen her as a failure –but maybe just a bit like him. Just a bit broken. Just a bit lost.
This is why he once felt like he had a connection with her. After his father left, it left him scarred. The man left without a goodbye, without a note, without leaving anything behind. Just packed up his things and didn't come back that time. Things had gone downhill from then… he had felt so lost, and now, wasn't even unwilling to admit it. He hadn't been able to open up to anyone since that happened, not even his mother. It was strange then for him, when he suddenly found himself at ease talking to someone again. He didn't give short answers or mumbled excuses; he really talked to her. It seemed like they both needed a friend at that time –someone they could find solace in.
And now… now he was losing her, too. But, he couldn't let that happen. He had to find out what was really bothering her.
"Is this really all because of him?" He asked, breaking the silence. "All because of what happened?" As he spoke, she didn't even move. She acted as if she didn't hear his words, and, instead, just stared down at the counter. "Is it, Sora?"
"No." She answered quietly, not looking at him.
"Then what is it?" He tried again, hoping she would actually give him an answer. She didn't answer, but just had a tired look in her eyes as she glanced at him before looking away once more.
Jim sighed, rolling his eyes. "Please don't tell me this is all because of what I said." He finished in a much louder tone than he wanted.
"…"
Shaking his head, he questioned her once more. "Why are you making this so difficult?"
It was then that she finally acted like she heard him. Locking their gazes, she spoke in a harsh tone. "Why are you making it all seem so easy? You somehow know exactly how you feel and now you think it should be the same for me!" Standing up, she took a deep breath but still couldn't lower her voice. "I don't have the faintest idea of how I feel about you, alright? All that time, I learned not to feel anything. Not to feel guilt or fear or compassion. And then, you were this… stranger that just came along and broke through all of that -"
She grew confused when she noticed he remained emotionless, but couldn't help but continue in an angry tone. "I don't know if I should hate you for that… or else-" She cut herself off there, closing her eyes for a moment and then taking a deep breath. With her gaze cast down, she shook her head and started towards the door.
Jim didn't have to think twice about whether or not he should stop her.
She pushed her way through the crowed pub, moving fast so as to just get away from the place. Some part of her mind was hoping he wouldn't follow –she knew she'd yell at him if he did and… she didn't want to hurt him again. Yet, another part wanted him to. The dim lighting of the candles combined with the thick smell of smoke that swept over her as she walked across the room made her all the more anxious to leave.
The cold night air was a relief as she stepped out of the building. It took only second for her eyes to adjust to the darkness before she headed down the street. The lamps lining her path were a faded yellow color but hardly lit up anything, yet she continued on. Even though she knew it was a mistake, she didn't go back. She didn't even bother looking back, for she knew he would probably follow. And that would only end in him getting hurt again. It was as if she couldn't even control what she said. The harsh words just came out to easily. Still, she wondered why he put up with it.
It's because he… loves me. Her mind answered immediately. Isn't that part of what love is? Becoming vulnerable around someone, but trusting them not to hurt you? Feeling terrible after realizing this, she quickened her pace. After a few moments she stopped dead in her tracks, and turned slightly with a puzzled look on her face. She didn't hear footsteps. He wasn't following her.
And quite frankly, she wanted to know why.
Her expression deepened when she saw him. Standing just outside the door with his hands in his pockets, a grim look came across his face as he gazed back at her. She could hardly see him beneath the pub's light above the door, all her eyes could see was nothing more than a dark figure. Yet she could tell it was him.
"Why do you have to keep running away from everything?" He called out softly, his expression never changing.
Something about what he said struck her. It hurt. This… realization of what she had been doing her entire life seemed almost completely new to her mind. "I-" She cut herself off, finally seeing the truth. "I guess I've made it a habit." Finishing, she folded her arms over her chest and turned away, unable to keep a straight face any longer. As soon as he could not see her, she shut her eyes tight for a moment, willing herself not to cry. She didn't know why she felt like this, but she did know that she wouldn't let herself show that kind of weakness.
Walking faster, her heart sped up and she only felt worse. She blessed every star in the sky for the fact he did not follow her –she wouldn't let him see her like this. Old words rang in her ears loudly, and all attempts to forget them were in vain. She had been taught to be strong. Don't show weakness. Don't act sympathetic. Don't show mercy. Don't care. Ever.
For one of the first times in so long, she began to hate all those things piracy had given her in exchange for a miserable life on Mardella. The life had held such promise –freedom…and adventure. Now, she could see that they were just covering up the cold truth. It was impossible to have those things without a sacrifice –like every part of you that wasn't completely wretched.
She walked at an even faster pace, her only desire to be able to look back and not see him anymore.
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A/N:
The next, and last, chapter is about half way done already, so the wait shouldn't be as long.
Awakening. In life, there is no comfort such as that from a friend.