Dallas have I loved
Standing on the edge of the cemetery she watched them lower the pine box with a look of disinterest in her gray eyes.
Aloofness was something she learned at a young age, and she wore it like a shield. Cause in the East side any weakness discovered was exploited. When you seemed like you cared for nothing you were safer. Which was why she seemed nothing more than a curious bystander on the outside when on the inside she was coming apart at the seams as her soul cried for the only boy she'd ever love. Dallas Winston was in that pine box being placed six feet deep and she wanted to scream. They'd been two of a kind… it was why she'd two-timed him.
He'd gotten under her skin, and that made him dangerous. She should've ended it a long time ago, but he was like a drug, she couldn't' quit. It was impossible to give up the one person that made her actually feel for the first time in years. But she knew if she made him mad enough he'd quit her, at least for a while. He had a rep to uphold, and if he cared for nothing else he cared for loyalty. Cheating would turn her off him at least long enough for her to get her shit together so she could stop wishing for a future he could never give her.
Dallas had never been the marry and settle down type, and the minute she found her thoughts straying in that direction she ditched the one woman man act she'd been pulling. She was a whore, and she knew it. Knew her place. It was what had defined her from the time she was fourteen and realized a few minutes in the dark filled the empty place inside. The problem was it only filled it for a while, so she had to do it over and over spreading her legs, but never opening her heart… until Dallas. Wither it was because he never cared for her past, or they possessed the same practical mentality about sex that made her lower her shields she couldn't say. What she did know was trying to play it safe had left her with the eternal question of what if.
If he'd known she'd loved him would he have come to her that night instead of knocking off the drug store? He'd done that sometimes, come over to blow of steam. He never really talked about anything but he'd curl his body around hers when the passion had passed and hold her. The warmth of his body seeping in to hers making her feel safe, and protected. Like for that moment in time she was actually important to someone. Feeling the tears well as the dirt was shoveled into the hole she turned on her heel and walked away before anyone caught the tell tale shimmer of tears glinting.