The terrible Tale of Akatsuki and the effects of Christmas Excess
The day dawned sluggishly, as if even the sunlight couldn't be bothered to drag its way over the disgraceful world. The dull light shone down the deserted street and lit up the mess, litter and tumbledown hovels that passed for houses in this neighbourhood. The suns weak winter rays filtered through the dirty and ripped curtains of the sitting room window and fell upon 10 sleeping criminals in various states of peacefulness. The least of which was squirming in his sleep, heavily bandaged and almost tied up. He awoke with a yell.
"Untie me you decrepit poofter!" he said in anger and thrashed about. The bandages tied his arms to his sides and his legs were bound together. "What's with us all sleeping in here the past two nights anyhow, this isn't a fucking highschool slumber party"
"Dude, shut up" a quiet voice sighed from under a duvet, a red haired head peeped above it with eyes narrowed against the morning light. The blankets stirred next to Sasori and a familiar orange mask poked up. "Hidan-san shhhh be quieter!" he spoke in a hushed voice.
Hidan continued to writhe about but to no avail. "I have to get away from this queen" he hissed nodding his bandaged head at the sleeping Kakuzu, "you have no idea how badly I need to get out of this room..."
"If I untie you, will you shut up?" said a husky voice by Hidan's feet. The dreaded Itachi had woken up and crawled away from kisame. "And for the record, I think Orochimaru got away in the night."
"Got away? That wanker never gave me a present, but then again some animals crawl off when they know they're going to die..." Hidan mused as Itachi burnt through the confounded bandages. He shook himself free of them, nodded in thanks then ran for it.
"Woa what's the rush?" murmured Deidara sleepily as the priests boot narrowly missed his blonde head. He sat up and watched Hidan as he ran up the stairs two at a time.
"Oh those two have something going on for sure" nodded Sasori .
The hours dragged slowly by as everyone dozed away boxing day. No one liked Boxing Day it was a fact. The presents were gone, everyone was sick, the place was a mess and there was nothing to do. When the light grew stronger the 9 people left in the room grudgingly stirred and raised their heads. The first shout of the day:
"Hey where's my-!" began Pein jumping to his feet and knocking a load of empty bottles into Zetsu's open flytrap.
"Here" said Konan quickly offering up the evil little bag. Pein relaxed and flopped back onto the sofa.
"You guys I think you should see this" a voice called out and Sasori raised his puppets arm and brandished the envelope that Kimimaro had brought along a few days ago. "It's an Invitation!"
"An invitation to what?" questioned the leader as he debated whether it was good to save the stash for later or have it all now.
"Is it a party? Tobi likes parties!" said Tobi excitedly.
"Yeah it's the Sound's (notorious) new years party, are we going?" continued the puppet master
All faces turned to their junkie leader. He paled, knowing it was his decision and he really didn't feel like making any proper decisions right now. Well except the stash-no stash one that was raging in his skull. "Erm...hands up who wants to go" he said hesitantly
Every hand was raised except Kakuzu's, he was still asleep. Sneakily Sasori attached chakra strings to his arm and raised it, making it a 100 vote.
"Ok then we're going, I presume the party is in the Sound village right?" said Sir Leader
"yeah just outside it, but wait that's going to take at long time to walk – we'll miss it for sure!"
"Not necessarily" said Pein with a smile on his face.
"Wait wait! We haven't asked everyone if they want to go yet" protested Tobi
Everyone looked around doing a head count. Two people were missing.
"Orochimaru got away in the night" Itachi repeated, "and Hidan ran off earlier"
At the mention of his partner's name, Kakuzu woke up with a start, and finding him gone he jumped to his feet.
"Where'd he go?" he demanded
"I dunno is it really that important?"
"You have no idea" and with that he ran from the room.
I love kakuHidan...prepare for some more
Hidan had spent the whole morning locked away in his room with his bible. He hadn't even looked at the weapons lined up neatly on the side. He guessed that after last nights little fiasco his partner had cleaned up. He was grateful. He just wasn't sure what to do, or what to think. Being gay wasn't against his religion or anything it just seemed... slightly wrong. Not overly wrong, just a little. He needed to get his thoughts sorted. He clasped his rosary in his hand and offered a small prayer to his god. He wouldn't normally pray about things like this, he didn't think Jashin-sama would care at all. He probably wasn't listening but it made Hidan feel better. He closed his eye and immediately Kakuzu's face appeared, enticing him, showing him what could be had if only he would just let go. Hidan's feelings towards the man had changed considerably since their first meeting, he didn't hate him as much as he used to, he wasn't sure if he even hated him at all. Was that just a facade he put up so that the others wouldn't see how very fragile he was beneath it all? Another tear slid out from his eye and joined the rest on the bible in his hands.
A knock at the door. His eyes sprang open revealing bloodshot whites and tears. He slammed the precious book shut and hid it under his pillow. "Who's there?" he called beyond the door.
"Just me..." a deep voice confirmed the priests fears, Kakuzu had returned. Suddenly he realized he didn't give a toss. He would have what he wanted, what they both wanted. He would take the next step and sod the others.
"I'm glad you're here, I'm also sorry about earlier" he admitted when the door creaked open an inch.
"can I come in?" his partner asked gently
"sure, whatever"
Kakuzu appeared, no longer drunk. He sat on the bed and looked his partner up and down. Hidan's injuries had already healed, only a few red marks remained when less than 12 hours ago there had been terminal wounds. He was truly immortal and Kakuzu said so.
"The problem with being immortal is you have to spend your life alone" Hidan said sadly, but really he knew in his heart that that was not the case for him.
"You're so wrong..." his partner muttered, and he turned his masked face to stare once more into the silver haired nin's eyes. He saw understanding there, and knew he too would never be alone again. This time he waited, he would not make the first move. Sure enough, Hidan could bear it no longer and he leaned into Kakuzu.
"Save me from the cold" he cried into his friend's cloak. He'd cried a lot lately and he knew it. He tried to wipe away the tears but they wouldn't stop falling.
"It's ok" Kakuzu whispered and comforted him. He drew him close and kissed his forehead like a brother.
"I'm sorry I fought you for so long" Hidan continued, pushing himself upright. He got up and strode towards the door. "I'm going back downstairs are you coming?"
"Not so fast" the masked man growled, he shot out one of his hands and pushed the door closed once more. Flicking it up he took hold of the Jashinists wrist and pulled him back to the bed. A wide grin spread across his face and he didn't resist the pressure on his thin arm as he was lead back across the room. He crawled onto the dark fabric of the bed. But he didn't think he'd be able to face this today. His mouth twisted in a smirk, he knew he would kill for just a bit, just a little bit. He laid back and Kakuzu looked at him disgusted at how willing he was to lay himself open to attack.
Kakuzu assumed his rightful position on top with Hidan's shoulders between his strong hands; he dipped his unmasked head and placed a rough kiss on his lips. Each time he pulled him apart it felt better and better, he took it as red that Hidan enjoyed what they did. If he didn't, why did he keep asking for more? A cold hand trailed a line down Hidan's bare chest and hooked in his pants, a quick jerk of his arm and they were gone along with his cloak into a dark corner. He lay helpless in pale boxers, practically begging for the next move.
"Kuzu..." his voice was soft and pleading, as were his eyes. The stitch man looked him in the eye then looked away.
"Is this really what you want?" he asked, amazed that anyone on gods green earth could wish for pain like he did.
"Kuzu...now...soon" he whined as he arched his back enticingly, "can't wait...any longer"
Kakuzu glared again in disgust but he was pretending, his nerves were twitching and he needed this more than he thought he'd needed anything before. He needed it more than money, more than any amount of bounty. His body grew hot and excitement twisted in his stomach like 100 hungry snakes. He dropped his head and devoured the man beneath him. His teeth scraped the other mans member and his tongue licked away the blood the rose to the surface.
In all the years of his long life, Hidan had never experienced this. He moaned like a wanton slut and succumbed to his lover's fierce demands for submission.
This guy is too sexy for his own good, thought Kakuzu as he kissed away the pre-cum that was making its appearance known. He raised his head and stared into his lover's barely open eyes.
"Oh you're not fucking done yet" Hidan growled through clenched teeth, the masked nin's multiple heartbeats were pounding a rhythm both of them could feel, like a metronome they followed the beats. Followed them into a realm of pleasure uncompromised. Kakuzu crawled slowly up his partner's chest until they were face to face once more, they were bare - sky clad- and both could feel the heat of the other pressing tightly on their groin. Hidan was shaking with uncontrollable lust,
"Just...do it already!" he squirmed again so he could feel Kakuzu's length rubbing almost painfully against his own.
"Beg" the demanding tone seemed to vibrate deep in the missing nin's ears.
"Fuck you! I hate you!" Hidan screamed and strained his neck up towards the other mans face, desperate for one more passionate kiss. His arms and ankles were now held fast by smooth black tentacles; they spun around his wrists and bound them to the bed posts. The ones around his ankles tightened considerably producing a yelp from the perfectly formed mouth.
"That's not good enough, beg again or I'll not hesitate to hurt you" the surprisingly emotionless voice commanded. Cold green eyes bore into angry violet ones.
"The only being I beg to is my god!" cursed Hidan, his eyes narrowed as he waited for the punishment he knew would follow, he leaned into it, waited for it, savoured it. He would kill again and again for every last bit of the agony Kakuzu could provide. Sure enough, as he let out a shuddering breath, three shining black tentacles rushed in on him, they hit his left side and continued inside his torso. Instead of rolling away from the force, he pushed against it with all his strength, the pain exploded and grew, it grew and throbbed until he was panting and crying. Pleasure and pain mingled together in this extreme moment until both were just the same.
Using the shiny tentacles as leverage the limp and bloody ninja was turned over. Hidan buried his face in the pillow and screamed into it as a fresh sensation began along his spine. A kunai, short and sharp was being drawn down his back, he could feel his own hot blood pumping out in bursts over his back. "Kuzu...now!!" he choked.
This time he got exactly what he wanted, his partner inside him. One finger at first, then two lubed up with his own blood. They skipped three altogether and went in for it. Slowly and carefully, it seemed to last forever and a day. The second Hidan felt it he knew this was what he needed, what he'd desired since he first saw that masked face. A sick kind of satisfaction manifested itself in his heart and built up until he felt sure he could die right now, right here, at last.
"Kuzu finish me!!" he wailed into the cushions, his fingers dug into them until the snowy white feathers mixed with the mess they had made. Kakuzu needed no further persuasion, with one final ram that sent the priest shrieking for his god, he took hold of the smaller mans shoulders and withdrew slowly and painfully.
Hidan, left empty and nearly paralyzed by the force of which they had made love, waited for the final blow to fall. Where would it come from? Through his pounding heart? Through his aching chest? He felt the glistening muscular tentacles slide out of him, then he was turned onto his back by coarse hands. He lay broken staring up into a green eyes face. There were tears in his eyes he knew, feeling embarrassed he wiped them away.
"You don't want me to finish you" came the startling reply
"Fuck you! Give it to me!" Hidan howled, as he tugged at the ropes that bound him still. He was tied in a star shape with his chest laid bare and vulnerable. He thrashed about, wild with passion and sick with desire. Nothing could curb his lusting for his own blood, for the pain he knew would carry him closer to blessed Jashin. Again he arched his lithe back, again he squeezed his eyes shut and begged.
"You're a hard mother fucker to please aren't you?" snarled Kakuzu, but deep within his four hearts there lingered a sadistic pleasure. It told him he enjoyed watching the smaller guy suffer, savoured every rattling, blood-filled breath he took, relished every satisfied masochistic whim. He advanced on the pearly white skin with Hidan's own pike raised.
"Oh god...please" the priest moaned aloud, and then the cold metal came out of nowhere, rushing down upon him with incredible speed and power. "Make it hurt!!" he cried out, the cry was so loud that everyone else in the house heard it. His craving was about to be extinguished.
The pike entered through his heart and carried on through to the bed beneath. Kakuzu was far from done, he twisted the pole around making his partner let out a piercing shriek. Leaving that rammed firmly in, he laid his hands around the cold throat and began to squeeze tightly. Hidan gasped for air but none came. He realized he was cumming and dying at the same time. He clawed at Kakuzu's hands, begging him not to let go but to push harder, harder until everything turned to black and stars popped in from of his streaming eyes. The blood pounded a tattoo against the masked nins closed fingers, driving him crazy. He held the strangle for a few more precious seconds then released his partner and his seed over the bed.
Barely conscious Hidan squinted through bloodshot eyes at the man above him. He looked at his own chest which was covered in dried blood, fresh blood and the massive damn pole sticking up vertically from him.
His mouth tried to form words but the air wouldn't come for him to pronounce them. His lungs were most likely punctured, he'd be lucky if his neck wasn't broken. As for his heart well that had probably stopped too. Instead he mouthed the words, desperate to be understood. It was paramount that he made himself understood.
'not-enough' Kakuzu lip read from the near corpse of his friend.
"Not enough? What the hell?" he exploded leaning in to slap Hidan's pretty if blood covered face. He stopped himself just in time when he realized that's just what he wanted. A smirk had spread across his face.
'pussy!' Hidan mouthed insultingly.
"Oh you didn't just- not enough? I'll..."the sadistic smile was back.
He bared his nails and punched Hidan right in the chest, the nails ripped the flesh and tore it away. Using both hands he punched deeper and with the use of his tentacles he wrapped them around the cold, still heart. A feeling of pleasure unrivalled had taken over Hidan's whole body and mind. He was no longer in the room, his mind was flying, flying far away. Maybe today would be the day...the day he could finally pass into heaven.
"Maybe I should take this for myself" Kakuzu mused aloud and he clutched the immortal's heart in his discoloured hand.
'It was always yours' Hidan tried to whisper, 'thank you...' he closed his eyes and was gone.
Note: NO Hidan is not dead! I wouldn't kill my fav. Character just like that!!