Notes: Thank you so much for all your reviews! Enjoy the second chapter!
(Sorry for the shortness of the chapters!)
Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts
Rule 2:
"No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class."
One day, midway through their fourth year, Harry, Ron and Hermione were enjoying an uneventful (but only by Hagrid's standards) Care of Magical Creatures class. They were studying Crups, and Hagrid was currently demonstrating the Crup's reaction pattern to unfamiliar objects (often students' hands).
Of course, everyone knew that the peace wouldn't last.
The disturbance came in the form of one Blaise Zabini who, as typically, turned up late for class.
When he did finally get there, Blaise sauntered cockily up to Hagrid, who was trying to get a book out of the grasp of a Crup's mouth, and said, in the best fake Australian accent he could muster- painfully mixing Australian and American slang-, "Howdy folks. Look 'ere at this beauty. A crup, eh? A mighty fine breed too, if I may say so me-self!"
He had to stop there, because his manly giggles overcame him, defeating his strongest, most worthy efforts at holding them back. After a few seconds, however, he had beaten them back and was able to continue.
"Check this out folks! Now, I'm gonna' demonstrate to you the true capacit-ay of the crup!"
Smirking, he stalked dramatically over to where he had dumped his bag and hauled his copy of the thick Care of Magical Creatures book out.
Crossing back to where a shocked looking Hagrid was standing, staring at his student-gone-crazy in horror, he held out the book, copying Hagrid's actions of ten minutes earlier.
The crup, not recognizing the book, lunged for it, managing to escape from Hagrid's iron grip with a surprising burst of strength, and attached itself painfully to Blaise' arm.
He wrenched the crup off and backed away, looking on in disgust, before continuing on to spout sentences and profanities that would have scarred even the most hardy person's mind- still in his Australian accent.
Suddenly, Hermione burst out laughing.
The whole class swung around to stare at her, even Blaise himself, some in curiosity, some in horror, and some- mainly Muggleborns- sharing her amusement.
"Something funny, Granger?" Blaise asked, scowling at her and still clutching his arm.
Hermione, bent double and with her arms wrapped tightly around her stomach, as if she was trying to hold herself together, struggled to answer.
"Sorry… it's just… you sound like- like Ste-ve… Irwin!" she gasped out in between giggles and haggard breaths.
"Who?"
"Steve… Irwin! He was a- a Muggle… crocodile hunter!"
"Hmm…" Blaise thought about it for a moment, then said, in his exaggerated Aussie accent, "Well if you're sure, Miss Granger."
Hermione didn't see it coming, but suddenly she was lying on her side in the grass, her muscles giving spasms rapidly from laughing so much, and Blaise Zabini standing over her with a mocking smirk on his face.
"So sorry, my arm shot out by accident. Didn't mean to push you, Granger." His fake accent was still in place.
He held out his hand, and it took a moment before she was strong enough to take it and pull herself up off the ground.
Well, thanks for reading! As promised, the next chapter will follow today, so check this space- in about ten minutes!
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