A/N: Hello people! First update in what seems like ages, so please review!
RAFT tip of the day: If you are dancing and a creepy guy comes and tries to dance with you, quickly dance away and start a conga line and kick him when you dance by.
The demasculinisation of Neji Hyuuga…
"But I wanted to go shoe shopping!"
"No no no Sakura, that is too strenuous, after all, it's only been two weeks since you got out of the hospital. We'll go cliff jumping instead." Sakura sighed in defeat. Tsunade had assigned her to Alex for a few days after their team found she had a talent for medical ninjutsu. Unfortunately for Charlie, it was very uncontrolled.
"Okay fine, but after that, you're going to train."
"Sure, sure, let's go!" Alex grabbed Sakura by the arm, and pulled her all the way to the lake.
"Oh swim time, swim time, swim, swim, swim, hey Sakura what are you doing?"
"Something happened here, something great and terrible. I sense it. I sense…Sasuke with out a shirt!" Alex looked up from her back stroke, fangirls could sense those sort of things?
"How do you know?"
"…" Sakura said nothing instead she sat on the ground with a happy blank look on her face. She was dead to the world. Alex just shrugged, oh well more cliffs for her. She raced up the hill and was about to jump into the water when…
"NOOO!!!! Lady Alex! You must not jump, you have too much to live for! It will destroy your youthfulness! No Lady Alex you must defeat the enemies of your kingdom and regain your throne!"
Alex looked down at Lee, confused, she was only cliff diving. Oh well maybe she could use this to her advantage.
"Oh Lee! It's been horrible! My team throws bowling balls at me, blue people try to eat me, and Charlie drank all the ru--milk!" Lee came up to Alex with tears in his eyes.
"Lady Alex, this is all my fault! I was so consumed with becoming a splendid ninja, and proving hard work conquers all I was unaware of your plight! Oh Lady Alex is there anything I can do to make it up to you?" Alex looked up through her crocodile tears.
"Well you could…" Lee leaned closer to Alex to hear the next part of her request. He blanched, but he would do anything for Lady Alex!
"Alright! I will be back!" Alex clapped happily as Lee dashed off. Then, making sure he was far enough away, she leapt off the cliff with a Tarzan yell, scaring Sakura. Swimming to shore, she wondered idly how Lee would get the object of her desires. Just as she made it to shore, Sakura ran up to her.
"What the heck are you doing? Are you trying to kill yourself, what if you drowned, heck, I didn't even know you could swim! How do you think I felt? And how-----oh, hi Lee." Lee ran up to them, panting, a white bundle under his arm. He held it out to Alex.
"Here. Please use it wisely. I believe it would be unwise to provoke him any further than you already have----Lady Alex!!" She had stripped off her shorts and tank top, revealing her swim suit. Lee had covered his eyes and turned around while she struggled to get one of Neji's pretty dresses over her head. Finally fastening it, she spun around in a circle.
"Lee look! I'm just like Neji now! Except that this looks way better on me of course…." Sakura stared in shock at Alex, who was in Neji's clothes.
"Alex, why are you wearing that? If Neji catches you, you're dead!" Lee nodded.
"Indeed, it would be most harmful for you if he were to see you." Alex pondered their words for a moment, before happily skipping toward town, Lee followed her.
"Lady Alex, what are you doing?"
"I gotta go show Charlie, besides, Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship has another mission today!" She posed epically on the small hill before dashing away. Lee stared after her with starry eyes.
"So youthful!!"
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"Raindrops keep falling on my head, but that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turning red. They keep falling!" Charlie sang loudly and off key around Sasuke, who was still too traumatized over the rum incident to tell Charlie to be quiet.
Just as Charlie was about to break into a new song Alex appeared.
"Ah ha! Take that Charlie see how cool I am, oooh this will teach you to drink all the ru--milk." Sasuke was broken out of his rum induced trauma long enough to stare at Alex.
"Those are Neji Hyuuga's clothes. How did you get them?"
"You got ninja clothes? No fair! Quick Sasuke strip and give me your clothes!"
"No." Charlie looked up at Sasuke crestfallen and about to cry, when Anko and Sai appeared.
"Where were you two? We have a mission! Move it!" Alex and Charlie were dragged away by their ears.
"Alright you three, today we have a rescue mission. We are to retrieve Mrs. Pennywinkles."
"Oh who's Mrs. Pennywinkles? Is she some important diplomat, or a great inventor? Are evil ninjas after her?"
"Mrs. Pennywinkles is a cat."
"Oh."
"She got stuck in the tallest cherry tree on the west side of the city; we just have to get her back to her owner. Alright troops, follow me!" After a few minutes of walking and Sai staring strangely at Alex, they came to the tallest cherry tree in Konoha. They all looked up, but couldn't see or hear anything.
"Okay, Alex will go up on this side and Sai on the other side. Charlie will stay on the ground in case something goes wrong." Charlie saluted her and swaggered away. Anko stared after her suspiciously but turned her attention back to Sai and Alex as they walked up the tree. "Yell if you spot her!"
"Aye aye!" Alex disappeared into the boughs of the tree, once again leaving Anko confused. These girls did not have very ninja-like tendencies, they were almost like----no that couldn't be it. As Alex got into the higher branches, she spotted a small fluff ball near the top-most branches. She and Sai were opposite each other, and he motioned her to keep going up, she being lighter than he was. As she came near the small kitten, she saw that it was clinging in fear to a small branch. She awed at it's cuteness before trying to pick it up. It hissed at her and scratched her hand.
"Oww! That's not very nice kitty, I'm trying to help you, come to Alex!" The kitten hissed again before jumping to a higher branch. Alex grumbled and followed, just as Sai started yelling at her to come back down. With a crack, the branch she was on gave out. She managed to grab the kitten just as they began falling.
Charlie sat happily on a bench a few meters away from the tree reading an interesting magazine when someone walked by her and began talking to Anko, who was denying involvement in whatever he was accusing her of. Suddenly, they looked up at the tree in horror as a loud crash was heard. As Charlie looked up, she saw Alex land in a heap on her back right in front of Neji and Anko. Sai leapt nimbly down and stood beside them.
"Maggot! What happened, did you secure the target?" Alex nodded, her eyes still swirly, as she sat up and pulled the kitten out of the front of her dress. As she handed the shocked kitten to Anko, she noticed another pair of eyes fixed on her. Turning around, she was greeted by the sight of Neji staring at her in shock.
"What are you wearing?"
"Um, one of your pretty dresses."
"Why?"
"Because I decided to revamp your outfit, see I added pink sequins to the sleeves and a purple fur trim. I wanted to test it out before I showed you."
"Give it back now!"
"Oh I knew you would like the pink and purple, here you go." Alex started to take off her clothes when Lee appeared out of nowhere and jumped in front of her.
"NO Lady Alex! You must not! Think about your modesty and virtue!"
"Um Lee, I'm wearing a swim-"
"Here Lady Alex." In Lee's outstretched hand was a green jumpsuit, just like the kind Lee wore before his makeover. Alex stared incredulously.
"Lee I can't wear this. It isn't pink." Lee gasped and dug into his jounin vest and pulled out a pink jump suit.
"Here Lady Alex is this more suitable to your moon stature?" Alex nodded enthusiastically and put on the pink jump suit. Once she was dressed, Lee ripped off his clothes to reveal his green jumpsuit. Both clad in brightly colored jumpsuits, Lee and Alex ran off into the sunset. Leaving a very angry and confused Neji.
"Umm, okay team, since Alex has just ran away….it's up to us to return Mrs. Pennywinkles to her owner. Move out!!" With that, Anko and Sai began walking away. Charlie looked off toward the sunset where Lee and Alex disappeared, shook her fist, then followed them.
Neji stayed in the same spot, staring into the sunset, before leaning down and picking up his discarded clothing, now clad with pink sequins and purple fur. He stood solemnly, holding it to his chest, humiliated and unable to exact revenge. Suddenly, an evil smirk appeared on his face. He began laughing evilly until a civilian passed him and ran away in fear. He stopped abruptly and turned to go back to the Hyuuga complex. That girl would pay. He had a plan now. Tomorrow, she was finished.