A/N: OC's will be appearing in the next chapter, though we made a couple references in this one. Do not despair! Review and tell us what you think!
RAFT tip of the day: When creepy hairy men stalk you, don't feel bad. At least he's not blue and trying to eat you.
Alex Falls in Love….
A few days later…..
"Is that it Anko-sensei?" Alex and Charlie pointed ahead to a large village appearing in the distance.
"Sure is maggots. Welcome to the sand village." The two girls stared ahead.
"It's just sand castles! Everyone lives in giant sand castles! What happens when it rains? Wouldn't it wash away everyone's houses? They must live in constant fear of flash floods!"
"Alex they live in a desert."
"Good thing too! Poor sand castle dwellers." They came up to the gates of the village and was stopped by the guard.
"Halt! State your business here." Anko marched up to him.
"I'm here to enter my team in the chuunin exams!" She gestured to the girls and Lee. "Here's our identification." She showed the man some papers, but he wasn't listening. The entire time Anko had been talking he had been staring at her drooling. Anko blinked as he smiled goofily and, shrugging, gestured for the others to follow her. Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship strolled down the streets of the sand village, getting odd looks as they passed. Half naked ninjas from the leaf where not a common sight.
"Alright listen up maggots we have to get you registered and ready for the exams." Charlie started waving her hand and jumping up and down. "Yes, Charlie what is it?"
"Anko-sensei how come ninjas take so many tests? I never had to take a test to be a pira- baker, I never had to take a test to be a baker." Anko gave her an odd look.
"Well a lot more goes into being a ninja doesn't it? So you need more tests to make sure we're not putting incompetent people in charge of protecting other people's lives." The girls blinked and Anko started off down the street again. They walked up to a large building and followed her inside. Inside was a long table set up with ninja lined up taking names and marking down which village they were from. Anko seemed to have spotted someone she knew.
"Ebisu! Ebisu! Over here!" Anko ran up to a man dressed in all black with sunglasses and a bandana. He turned around and jumped.
"Anko? What are you---what are you doing here? Wearing that?" Anko blinked.
"What do you mean? I'm here with my team, they're entering the chuunin exams, same as yours." The girls and Lee came and stood with Anko. Ebisu stuttered.
"I see. Umm, that's very…..Nice! That's very nice!" He suddenly grabbed his nose and turned around, being faced by three girls in bikinis was kind of startling, especially when one of them was Anko. She simply looked confused.
"Gee Ebisu you're weirder than usual today. But you better tell your team to watch out, mine's gonna kick ass!" He laughed uneasily and began inching away.
"Sure Anko, whatever you say, if people can stop staring at them long enough to throw a punch…then again, I suppose that could be an effective strategy….." He walked away from them, still holding his nose. Suddenly a boy appeared out of nowhere wearing a long scarf followed by a nerd wearing glasses and a girl with hair that defied gravity.
"Ebisu-sensei is something wrong with your nose? Hey are you two from the leaf village?" Konohamaru pointed at Alex and Charlie. "Sensei are these the two funny foreign girls?" Konohamaru pulled Ebisu around so that he was now facing Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship, sporting a nose-bleed for all to see. Konohamaru grinned. "Oh I see now….you found the pretty ladies sensei, but why are you guys in your swimsuits?" Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship looked at each other.
"Why not?" He blinked.
"Uhh, okay, I guess if you want to walk around in your skimmies that's up to you…but now my sensei's gonna die from blood loss!" He laughed and slapped Ebisu on the back, sending him to the floor. "Heh, oops." Suddenly Charlie pointed at Moegi.
"How the heck do you make your hair do that? Industrial strength hairspray?" Moegi looked insulted.
"No! It's natural." She posed and Charlie gave her a weird look.
"Okay little girl….weirdo." She turned around to face Alex and they both snickered. Konohamaru frowned.
"Hey, don't be getting cocky now! We may be from the same village but in this we are enemies. And don't think I'll go easy on you just cause you're girls!" Charlie and Alex looked at each other, then walked over to him. Alex walked over and leaned on him while Charlie came to stand in front of him. He looked down at her, then up at Alex. Suddenly both the girls started talking at once.
"Don't think we're gonna go easy on you cause you're a boy."
"Boys make better ninjas then girls!"
"They do not. You can't easily sneak into a place, and seduce the enemy to gather information, you can't take an enemy by surprise, or store extra weapons in your bra, girls can multi-task a thousand times better, and think of better strategies. What can boys do?"
"Boys are stronger!"
"When it comes to ninjutsu strategy is more important then strength."
"Is not!"
"Is too! You can have all the strength in the world, but if you don't know how and when to use it, it won't do you any good." The others watched on uneasily while Konohamaru and Charlie and Alex argued violently.
"Your Hokage is a girl dimwit!" With that, both girls whacked him upside the head and went to stand next to Lee and Anko. Konohamaru groaned and stood up.
"Foreign girls are mean! You better hope we don't have to fight later or you're gonna regret it!" With that, his team walked away. Anko stared after them for a moment, before slapping Alex and Charlie on the back.
"Way to go girls! That'll teach him. Kids always been hard to deal with, being the 3rd's grandson and all…." She trailed off and lead them up to one of the registration tables, where someone very familiar was standing.
"Shikamaru!!!!" Alex and Charlie leapt on him, all three of them falling to the ground. He groaned. "Shikamaru you came to cheer us on! Oh you're such a good friend! Sai look who came to cheer us on!" Charlie and Alex then presented the costumed Lee to Shikamaru, who did nothing but stare.
"Lee?"
"Um hello Shikamaru."
"What are you doing here? You already passed the test. Why are you half naked?" Suddenly the girls jumped in.
"Sai here has taken on a new appearance. He does kind of look like Lee huh? But no this is Sai." Charlie stressed giving Shikamaru a look that said 'Say anything and you won't be able to have children.'
"Sai's half naked because it's too hot here to not be in bathing suits, besides all this sand means the ocean is close. We're gonna go swimming." Shikamaru could've corrected Alex and exposed Lee, but he decided that it would take too much effort.
"Just sign here."
"Okay!" Alex bent over the table and signed her name, then moved to the side so that Charlie could sign hers. Shikamaru blinked.
"What is this?"
"Our signatures."
"They look weird. You're gonna have to sign in kanji."
"They do not! And I don't know what kanji is." Shikamaru sighed.
"Right, whatever, different alphabets. I'll write out your names in katakana later." Charlie and Alex, having no idea what he just said, simply nodded dumbly. The girls turned around and slammed into another person, yet again. They grumbled angrily and stalked off. Charlie stared after them.
"That ninja had a feather in his hair." Alex blinked.
"Huh. Weird." They waited for Lee to sign Sai's name and then followed Anko to the hotel. After dropping off their things Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship decided to explore the village.
"Alright maggots I'm going to meet up with an old friend. You are free to explore the village, remember to meet at the building you signed up at tomorrow at nine o'clock." 'Sai' and the girls took off while Anko walked away and found her 'friend.'
"Well hello Baki, you're looking mighty fine. I bet you would look better at my hotel room." Baki didn't say anything but just linked arms with Anko before walking away.
"Nice hat."
Just down the street, Lee, Charlie, and Alex walked through the village, admiring the sand castle-ness of all the buildings and wondering why nobody else was wearing swimsuits like they were. It was hot! Lee lead them past a very large building with a kanji symbol on it with a blue background, similar to the fire emblem on Hokage tower. While the girls stared in awe at the mightiest sand castle of them all, Lee gasped.
"Gaara-san! It is very good to see you again!!" Charlie blinked and ran over to Lee, who had run over to a strange man in white and blue robes and was shaking his hand.
"No SAI, what are you talking about? You've never been here before…ha ha…." Charlie laughed nervously and pulled Lee away from the very scary looking man before he gave away his identity. Lee looked at her.
"Yes I have. I fought him in my chuunin exams. He almost killed me, but we are friends now." Lee beamed happily at the man, then turned and gave a thumbs up to Charlie. She sighed.
"Shit, we're gonna have to go over the whole secret identity thing again, come on, let's go back to the hotel. Alex, we're leaving. Alex?" She turned back to Alex, who had not moved and was staring with wide eyes at Gaara. He stared back. Charlie looked between the two nervously, before pulling Lee farther back. Alex walked slowly toward him, before stopping in front of him. Gaara stared back, curious as to why she was staring at him, and because he had never seen a foreigner before. He looked at her hit-aite bearing the leaf symbol, and decided that she was not a threat. If she was from the leaf village, then she was probably here for the chuunin exams.
"Alex, oh, look over there, it's a chocolate cake! You love your chocolate, yes you do…Alex? Alex?" Alex took Gaara's hand, and began to lead him away. His guards panicked.
"Hey, come back here!" They ran after them and pulled Alex from Gaara, who just stared at her. She blinked as his guards lead him away, and stood forlorn in the street. Charlie sighed and walked over to her.
"Come on Alex, I need to get you and Lee back to the hotel before you get us arrested." Alex just shook her head, never taking her eyes off Gaara. "No Alex we need to go. Sorry she is suffering from heat stroke. Sai! Get over here and help me!" Lee walked over and grabbed Alex, swinging her on to his back. Gaara stared at Lee, why was he half dressed with these odd foreign girls? Why did that one keep staring at him? "Okay Sai time to go." Lee started carrying Alex away, with her still staring wide eyed at Gaara.
Later that night, Charlie was attempting to break Alex out of her comatose state of being.
"Alex when I snap my fingers you will return to normal." SNAP. "Well damn that works in the movies. Shit we can't have a comatose teammate, I'm getting me one of those vests god-dammit! Okay Alex you're not going to impress the funny redheaded man by kidnapping him. You have to fight really well and win this competition, and then he will fall in love with you and you two can build sandcastles forever."
"Really?" Charlie looked at Alex. It really would be a horrible thing to lie directly to a friend, but she was going to win dammit all!
"Yes, he will." Alex's eyes shone and she stared dreamily out the window. Well, that was a start…
"Here, drink this." She handed her some sake and sat back against the wall. "Now all we have to do is decide who sleeps on the floor." The three of them surveyed the room with two beds and turned to the wall that separated their room from Anko's. A thump was heard. Okay, so not happening.
"I will take the floor, you two may sleep in the beds." Charlie turned to Lee.
"Lee that's mighty nice of you, but chances are we'll need you well rested to bail us out if Alex isn't fixed by morning. One of us is going to have to steal the other bed in Anko's room, it will be the most dangerous mission ever embarked upon, and the person may never come back the same, but it must be done."
"I will go!" Charlie looked at Lee, then back at Alex who was still in a daze.
"No Lee I have a better idea. Alex did you know that Gaara is really impressed when people can sneak into hotel rooms and steal unused beds without getting caught?"
"Really?"
"Oh yes you should go and steal a bed and bring it back here. I'll tell Gaara in the morning so that he won't think you've got a big head or anything."
"Okay." Alex raced out of their room and went to steal another bed.
"That wasn't a very nice thing to do." Charlie shrugged.
"Beats sleeping on the floor." Just then a shout was heard, followed by a loud crash. The two of them looked nervously at the door, before it slid open. Alex threw the bed into the room and shut the door. Unfortunately, it was occupied.
"Hey! What do you think you're doing! If you think kidnapping me will give you an advantage you've got something else coming! You----" Konohamaru stopped mid-sentence as Alex jumped into the bed with him and pulled the covers over her head. He mouthed wordlessly. Charlie slapped a hand to her forehead.
"I said unoccupied Alex." She pushed Konohamaru off the bed.
"What happened to your friend?"
"She saw a pretty boy." Konohamaru sat speechless. Foreign girls were so weird.
"Alright kiddo out of our room we're going to sleep."
"Hey I'm not a kid, and this is my bed!"
"Look I don't care, but I can't convince Alex to steal two beds, I'm not going into Anko-sensei's room, and I'm older then you, therefore I am right." Charlie chased Konohamaru out of the room and shut the door in his face before going to bed.
The Next Morning….
"Guys wake up, we have to go in an hour…." Charlie shook Lee awake and went over to Alex, who was in a lump under all the covers on her stolen bed. "Alex wake up, we have to take the test and get cool vests….and Gaara will be there…." Alex shot up and began rifling through her pack, looking for clothes. She pulled out a new bikini and threw one at Charlie. Both girls started taking off their clothes, forgetting Lee was in the room.
"AH!" The girls turned and looked at Lee, who was covering his eyes and stumbling around the room, unfortunately the window was open and Lee fell out. A loud crash was heard. Both girls rushed over and leaned out the window to see a fallen Lee at the feet of Shikamaru.
"Uh, could you toss him up here?" Shikamaru sighed and picked up Lee, who had just recovered. Lee then panicked when he realized Alex and Charlie were leaning out of a window with only a sheet as covering. He ran up to the room, pulling both girls back, locking the window and pulling the curtain, before excusing himself. Shikamaru had not moved from his spot on the street. He sighed and shook his head, before walking away.
"Troublesome female foreigners."
Later at the Exam Building…
"Shit we're late!"
"Which room were we supposed to go to?"
"The one with all the ninjas in it."
"No shit. Oh it's the leaf boy! Yo Leafy come here!" Alex ran up to Konohamaru and grabbed him by the scarf. "Where are we supposed to go?"
"You don't know that? What kind of ninja are you?" Just as Alex and Konohamaru were about to get into another fight, Lee found the room.
"Lady Alex it is this one."
"Oh good." Team Fuzzy Pink Friendship epically pushed the doors open and walked into the room, unfortunately when they opened the door, they ended up slamming it into someone.
"Ow!" They blinked as they saw a girl fall to the floor next to a very large wolf, which was growling at them…..
"Oh, fetch boy!" Charlie threw a dog biscuit in the other direction and the wolf scampered off, knocking people over along the way. The girl got up and stared at them, before walking away, calling for her wolf. Alex looked at Charlie.
"Dude you just knocked over a blind chick. So not cool." Charlie shrugged.
"Then she shouldn't be standing in front of the door! What the heck are we supposed to do now? And why is everyone staring at us like we forgot our clothes or something?" Konohamaru looked over at her.
"That's because you're not wearing clothes, you're just wearing swimsuits! Not to mention you're weird foreign girls with funny eyes…." Alex picked him up by his scarf.
"Oh yeah? Well I could say that you have funny eyes too, but you won't see me being racist!"
"Lady Alex please, we are making a scene." Most of the people in the room were now staring at them, not only because they were wearing so little clothing, but because they thought Alex was going to beat up Konohamaru, and by the look of a lot of them, they looked bloodthirsty. Charlie suddenly spoke up.
"Hello other ninjas we will be competing against! I am Charlie, goddess of love and beauty, defender of the weak, and protector of the world! And guess what I'm gonna get me one of those damn vests, so you all can just suck it! Boo-yah bitches!" Then Alex decided to also introduce herself.
"I am Alejandra de la Vega, princess of the moon kingdom, saver of damsels in distress, and foe to all things evil in the world. You better watch out for my pink glitter and sparkles, cause I'm gonna kick your ass!" The two girls posed epically, while every other ninja in the room stared at them like they were crazy. Just then an exam proctor walked in.
"Alright everyone, if you will follow me, the written part of the exam will begin now." He looked strangely at the two girls, before standing back so that everyone could enter the exam room and sit at their assigned seats. Alex and Charlie circled the room before going over to the proctor.
"Hey, where's our names?" He growled.
"Everyone's names are by their seats, now sit down!" Alex shook her head and pouted.
"But I don't spell my name like that, Shikamaru changed it and he didn't tell me how." She stared at him with a sad face and leaned toward him hopefully. He fidgeted uncomfortably.
"Fine! You're those foreigners we were warned about, your seats are over here." He led Charlie to a desk next to the window, and Alex over by a girl with purple hair. "Alright there will be ten questions. You will score as a group, so that if one of you fails all of you fail. Is that clear? Begin!"
Charlie looked down at her paper and panicked. She couldn't read any of this. Okay that symbol looked like a window, and that one looked like a tree, so the question must have been if trees grew from windows. No they do not. Moving on…..
"Umm, excuse me…" Alex had walked over to one of the chuunin stationed around the room. She sat next to him. "I hate to be a bother, but I can't read any of this, do you think you could help me?" She leaned toward him with a smile on her face. He blushed.
"Well, I'm not supposed to---"
"Please? How can I answer the questions if I don't know what they say?" By now most of the people in the room were staring at her open mouthed, Charlie included.
"Damn, why didn't I think of that?" The chuunin looked around uncomfortably and then back at Alex, who was still smiling at him, in only a bikini and shorts. He caved.
"Well, okay, since you can't read it, I guess I can help…." He read the questions and helped her answer them while the other chuunin glared at him. It was against the rules but no one was going to stop the bikini clad foreign girl.
Charlie stopped glaring at Alex, that idea was taken she'd just have to think of something else. Looking out the window Charlie spotted a building with bright neon lights, with scantily clad women and old men surrounding it. Oh well she could use that. Charlie started copying everything from the building and poster and putting it on her paper.
One Hour Later…..
"Alright! Turn in your papers!" They passed their papers down the rows to the chuunin, who took them to the proctor. He left the room, leaving them all fidgeting nervously, except for Alex, who was chatting merrily with the chuunin who helped her cheat. The proctor came back in a few minutes later. He began announcing the teams that had to leave. Lee sat up straighter and looked over at Alex and Charlie, who both were talking loudly and obviously not paying attention. The proctor finished calling the numbers and the room was now half empty. He sighed in relief. He had not failed them! And apparently something Charlie put on her paper was right after all, as they all passed.
"You all pass." Charlie suddenly looked up.
"That was it? Awesome! Hand out the vests! I told you I would win!"
"Miss Charlie the exam is not over."
"It is to. He just said we passed. I want my fricking vest."
"Sit down! You've only just passed the first part, there are two other parts still."
"Oh." Charlie sat down with a sad look on her face.
"Now, I will introduce to you the proctor of the next part of the exam-----" Alex sat down next to Charlie and began chatting loudly again, until Alex suddenly stopped talking and paled, pointing to the front of the room. Charlie looked up to see a strange man in black with purple markings on his face, with what looked like a person in bandages on his back. Charlie shot forward with a yell.
"Watch out!!!" She flew and tackled the man to the floor.
"What are you doing?"
"There was a mummy right behind you! He was going to steal your organs, and eat you! You should thank me, first come the mummies then come the zombies!" The man stood up suddenly, causing Charlie to fall back to the floor. He laughed.
"Oh no, not a mummy. Much worse." Charlie paled. "But enough of that. I'm Kankurou and I will be guiding you through the next part of the exam." Charlie looked at him.
"What's that?"
"Survival testing. If you live, you pass."