BEFORE

Captain Jellico's Ready Room

She was as disconcerted as the others during the transfer of command ceremony. When she answered the hail to the ready room, and found both Picard and Jellico in attendance, Leo was caught in a quandary. Command had just been transferred… how should she address them? Protocol told her Jellico was now her commanding officer… instinct told her otherwise. She split the difference and deferred to generality.

"Sirs?"

"Captain Jellico," Picard extended his left hand toward Leo as if presenting an uncertain gift, "This is the Enterprise's Administrative Executive Officer Lieutenant Leora O'Reilly. In all matters of ship's administration and personnel her assistance is invaluable."

While polite, Jellico was obviously less than enthusiastic. "I'm familiar with your history, Lieutenant, and Captain Picard has provided an impressive overview of your performance under his command. I've scheduled a meeting at 0800 tomorrow to discuss your duties moving forward."

"I look forward to serving under your command, Captain." She hoped she sounded more sincere than she felt. Something was amiss here; she disliked being in the dark, and things around her were extremely dark at present. To offset her inner doubts, she added, "Welcome aboard the Enterprise, Captain Jellico. You'll not find a better ship or crew in the fleet." Yeah, well, she couldn't help that final bit. She knew that Jellico was no lightweight, but this was the Federation flagship, after all.

Jellico nodded in acknowledgment and announced, "I'll get back to my quarters (quarters Leo had assigned and appointed for him as the new captain of the ship) and work on my initial schedule."

Leo had done a bit of research the minute Picard had informed her – minus explanation, of course – of the upcoming transfer and had learned that Jellico had a reputation as an effective negotiator. Why would he suddenly be assigned to the Enterprise? Her musings were interrupted when the captain (Picard) said, "Thank you, Captain. I'll meet with the lieutenant for a moment before I disembark."

"Of course. Contact me when it's convenient." Jellico left without further comment.

Leo stood waiting. For orders, for explanations. For reassurance.

"Lieutenant, I'm sure you have many questions."

Good. He was going to explain.

"Unfortunately I cannot address them."

If all he was going to tell her was what was announced already in the senior staff meeting, why bother speaking to her privately? Picard leaned over his (Jellico's) desk and entered a code to switch off the ready room log recorder, then took a seat in one of the informal side chairs by the sofa and indicated she should do so as well. "I asked to meet with you privately for a reason."

She sat, and waited. "Something special I should know about the new captain?" The word "new" felt, and sounded, strange in her mouth.

"In a manner of speaking." Picard regarded Leo in silence for a moment. "Lieutenant, I must tell you that your administrative post puts you in a unique position to contribute something during this mission that otherwise would be impossible."

This was more than Starfleet talking, more than Federation protocols. Leo told him without an ounce of posturing, "You know whatever you ask I'll do whatever it takes to make it happen."

The captain sat back in his chair and smiled. "'Whatever it takes'. I seem to remember you speaking those words before, under very trying circumstances. I never imagined I'd be in a position to have to ask you to make good on that promise."

Too vague, this was just too vague and uneasy for her. She liked it better when their interaction was direct, orderly. To the point.

"Perhaps you could just spit it out? Sir."

"Very well. Only the very highest security clearance in Starfleet is privy to the details of this mission. That includes myself, my away team, and Captain Jellico. Thus while the Enterprise will play a central role the crew, including yourself, will find itself in the unaccustomed position of having to blindly follow orders that may well challenge previous knowledge and experience."

"But that's happened before, hasn't it?"

"Yes, but until now it's happened under my command."

Ah. Point taken. No matter what aspect of "where no one has gone before" they were confronted with, a constant had been the commander they knew and trusted even when they thought they questioned him. Jellico was not only new, he was new in a situation that would demand an extraordinary level of "instant" trust.

"Old dogs, new tricks, brand new handler. I think I'm getting it." Suddenly the implication hit home. This was a "be professional" pep talk! "I have to say I'm a little, well, I'm not sure what the word is but I never expected you'd think you need to remind me of my duty here. I answer to the Big Chair, no matter who's sitting in it." A little stiff, she had to admit, but come on! How long had they been working together?

Picard was smiling again. "I'm counting on that. The urgency of this mission and the negotiations being undertaken preclude any time for 'adjustment' on the part of the crew. Edward Jellico is a first-class negotiator and a starship captain of proven merit. Quite frankly he feels your position is unnecessary… as did I in the beginning. And speaking strictly in terms of the official mission, he may be right. He'll make full use of Number One and Counselor Troi, and communicate directly with Mr. Data and Commander LaForge and other senior staff in all matters."

Leo shook her head in confusion. "I'm lost again… if I'm suddenly redundant, what's that 'contribution' you mentioned?"

Picard studied his A.E. for a moment as if looking for clues. "I'm afraid my requirements of you will be somewhat more pedestrian."

"I don't make coffee." She couldn't help herself.

Picard ignored the one-liner. "There will be a vast disconnect between the immediacy of Captain Jellico's orders and the inclination of the crew to trust them. What I need is for someone to bridge that gap… to offer the appearance of familiarity in the ready room. For that reason I'm asking that you remain in your post, undertaking whatever tasks Captain Jellico sees fit to order. I've convinced him you will be extremely useful in smoothing the way for him in terms of bringing the crew up to speed."

"You're not talking administration, are you?" Obviously he intended something more unofficial. "You want me to play both sides."

"I want you to bring them together, as best you can, in every situation you're able," he corrected.

Leo felt a surge of nostalgia. She'd been pretty good at that sort of thing, back in the day. How many times had she juggled opposites to get the job done? "Making everyone believe what they're getting is exactly what they want used to head my resume. Intergalactic customer service," she grinned. Her smile was not shared by the captain. If anything, his expression grew even more serious.

"Listen to me, Lieutenant. Leora. What I'm asking you to do is to navigate a minefield, and I need to know you understand exactly what that will entail. I have assured Captain Jellico of your professionalism, but the fact remains that you are married to the ship's second officer." She began to protest, but he headed her off. "Yes, yes, and his professionalism and devotion to duty is unquestionable. But the crewmates that relationship links you to, your friends and colleagues, the hard truth is they will see you as attached to a command in which they may have little faith. Even as they do their duty, they'll be looking for an ally in their uncertainty. I will depend on you not to be that ally."

"Look, you just said that this would provide some familiarity… now you're saying I'll be considered the enemy?"

"I'm saying that you'll be the focus of doubts, from all sides."

Leo shook her head in frustration. "So what's the point? If Jellico will be doubting my attachment to his command because of my friends, and if my friends and colleagues will be doubting my attachment to the crew because of my position, what can you expect me to accomplish?" Picard said nothing. He needed Leo to understand fully what she'd be agreeing to. She had to figure this out herself, here and now, or else he'd tell Jellico to go ahead and reassign her to another ship's area for the duration of the mission.

"Knowledge and belief," she said at last. "You need them to believe, to do what's needed without question, without having the knowledge they're accustomed to. Is that right?" She saw the smile that pulled at Picard's mouth. "I've kind of been living on both sides since I came here, because I had to. What I knew about the way life worked I had to just believe when I got here, or I'd never have managed. That's my 'unique position to contribute', isn't it?"

He nodded. "And I daresay it offers you a unique perspective, as well. Lieutenant, you must know I don't make this request lightly; not only will you be fulfilling your duty to the captain of the Enterprise under demanding circumstances, you will almost certainly find yourself lacking the support you've become used to in times of stress. You'll need to convince Edward Jellico that your proper place is in the ready room, and the crew that he's worthy of the same trust they've placed in me. I must stress that none of this is 'official'. It must remain, absolutely, between the two of us."

Leo knew exactly what that meant, and this whole thing was beginning to sound like more of a task than she was up to. It had taken her so long to connect with everyone but Data (and the Captain, she supposed). She didn't want them to think she was a suck-up. Or worse, that she knew something that they didn't, and was keeping it to herself. "If I just go business as usual, they might think I know something they don't." She looked questioningly at Picard, hoping he'd change his mind. Knowing he wouldn't. And if he asked, she couldn't refuse. She'd promised, a long time ago, when he'd risked so much for her. And even if she hadn't… she wouldn't say no.

"I can't even tell Data, can I."

"No. But of everyone you know, he would be the last to doubt you."

She smiled. "Yeah." She looked around the room, sighed, then looked resolutely at her captain. "Right. I'll do it. But tell me, what makes you think I won't turn the same way as the crew, if they don't trust Captain Jellico, since I don't have any more idea of what's happening than they do?"

"This is the new age of enlightenment, or so you've been inclined to state with audible quotation marks. What this task requires is the heart and wits of a cynic." He knew she wouldn't take offense.

"Well you've got me there. What about Jellico? Think he's more enlightened, or cynical?"

"I think he struggles to balance the two."

"Good. If I'm gonna be a human target I'd like to respect my superior."

The matter settled, Picard rose. "Very well. I suppose you'd better process my 'official' orders."

"A whole new meaning for 'science fiction'." She paused at the entry to her office and looked back at the captain as he prepared to reactivate the log recorder and exit the ready room that was no longer his. "I don't suppose, since we're all off the record and stuff, that you could tell me what you're really going to be doing?" She knew even now that it had to be more extraordinarily dangerous than anything she'd witnessed so far. He didn't reply. "Right. Hey, it was worth a shot."

"Leora, thank you. You may not realize it now but what you've agreed to do will be every bit as important as anything required of Number One or any other senior officer." He tried to lighten the serious mood. "And of course you'll keep ship's affairs in order until my return."

Nice try, she thought, unable to keep from wondering if he'd return at all. But what else could she do but play along? "Whatever it takes." Still, she had to add just as he reached the door, "Hey." When he turned, eyebrow predictably arched, she cautioned, "Watch your caboose, Dix."

"Whatever it takes, Lieutenant."

DURING

Ten Forward

"So you're saying you think Jellico's telling the truth? You don't think he's holding back from us, or maybe just doesn't know what he's doing?" Will was mightily pissed off just two days into the mission nobody understood, and it had become obvious since the return of the away team (minus the captain) that something ugly was afoot. Leo could read it all over Jellico during the meeting with the Cardassians even if the others couldn't. What Deanna had sensed as doubt was in fact the age-old diplomatic scam that even Leo had expected would be out of style in the 24th century.

The concept of Plausible Deniability had practically been invented in Leo's lifetime, and the "Who, Me?" looks on the faces of the principals could be read by anyone who'd been paying attention to national affairs during key periods in (her) earth history. My god, she thought, Picard knew exactly why he wanted me in the middle. She wouldn't share her crewmates' rage for explanation in key areas, because she wouldn't need it. Her rage was devoted to something else entirely: the knowledge that Plausible Deniability had never worked. It was true, military minds never learned from mistakes, they just kept repeating them hoping for a different outcome.

Now in Ten Forward, sitting with her colleagues whose moods ranged from suspicion through doubt and into rage and disbelief, she Did Her Duty as promised. "I think Jellico's in command, Will, and this is obviously Need-To-Know stuff." She noticed the slight narrowing in Data's expression as he took this in. He was, of course, also in the dark but predictably less unsettled. And he was aware that if his wife bluffed this well at the poker table, she'd own half the galaxy.

"Well we've always known what we 'need to know'," Geordi protested, "Captain Picard trusted us enough for that."

Leo choked off her inner logician. Her instinct was to debate all of this simply because she knew it was wrong, but it was a reflex she had to fight. The less said, the better. "Captain Picard isn't here anymore."

Worf glowered, but said nothing. His disapproval was tangible every time he looked at her. She could see that he no longer regarded her as an Honorable Person, but an expedient weakling.

"So then 'orders are orders', right?" Will snapped at her. "Y'know I used to think you understood what we do here, that you'd become one of us. Turns out you just know who to attach yourself to, to get what you want."

That he didn't just mean a ship's commander was obvious when he looked pointedly at Data, who responded in an even voice, "Commander I must protest. While your distress is understandable, your insult is unacceptable."

Will faltered for a second. "I'm sorry Data, but we all know what this looks like. And it's looking exactly like Leo's first duty is to Leo, and Captain Picard can go to hell as long as the right orders are followed." While the looks on the faces of Geordi, Deanna, and Worf didn't express outright agreement, nobody spoke up. Deanna had, particularly, been trying to read something of Leo's motivation, but her friend's anger and distress was blocking any more subtle emotions.

Leo leapt up abruptly, shaking off Data's restraining hand. "My first duty, Commander Riker, is to the commander of the Enterprise, whoever that may be. You'd be wise to remember it's your own as well." She looked at them all, feeling dangerously close to spilling everything, just to stop the slings and arrows. But her promise to the captain, their captain, held her back like a force field. "If Captain Picard is going to hell, believe me, we'll all be going with him." And she stormed away.

"If you will excuse me," Data announced quietly and rose to follow Leo.

Those left at the table looked at each other with expressions of mixed awkwardness and uncertainty. Will heaved a sigh and wiped a hand over his eyes, anger spent, clearly not proud of his outburst.

Finally, Geordi broke the awkward silence "She could be right," he suggested, "maybe we'll all be going to hell before this is over."

Data and O'Reilly's Quarters

He arrived seconds behind her to find her barely inside the door, pounding the wall with a clenched fist. The face she turned to him was tormented.

"I will not ask," he told her gently, "because I know you cannot tell me." Then she saw the barely perceptible twitch, the signal only she could read because it only happened in her presence. "I love you, Leora Eileen."

She threw herself in his arms. "Oh god, Data, that could be the only thing that can help me."

He led her to the sofa and sat them down, arms still around her. "It is hard not knowing where Captain Picard is, and what might be happening." That, at least, he believed she could safely respond to, but she shook her head vigorously and her expression was nearly desperate.

"That's just it, Data, I know what's happening. Not because anybody told me, but because I know the game. I'm sorry, D, I know you don't understand…"

He kissed her and reassured, "I do not need to understand at this moment. Whatever you wish to tell me will be sufficient."

She gripped his shirt in both hands, and told him, "I know. But all I can tell you is what everyone else here just doesn't get, I know what's happening to Captain Picard, and there's nothing any of us can do until the game's over."

She knew because it was what had happened to everyone who became caught in the middle and was abandoned to Plausible Deniability. It happened in Chile, in Argentina, in Viet Nam and the Middle East. It happened for no reason at all that would yield anything useful to anyone, because it happened only for its own sake, when cruelty was a handy substitute for "victory". And if the captain lived through it, the damage would never entirely heal.

Leo knew all of this, and it was tearing her up because she'd promised him, over and over she'd promised him she'd do whatever it took to stand up and stand by him and all she could do now was play make-believe Quisling as the game played out in its own wasted time.

Data hugged her tightly when she broke down. Whatever secret duty she was engaged in weighed on her in ways he could not lessen; he could only witness their effect.

"I promised him," Leo sobbed breathlessly, "I promised him and all I can do is my fucking duty!"

"If you are doing your duty, then you are keeping your promise to the captain. He will believe that even if you do not."

He held her until her weeping subsided and she fell into an exhausted sleep.

"Both of us will believe it for you," Data promised quietly as he tucked Leo in bed.

"Commander Data, report to the ready room."

He switched off the emotion chip and reported for duty.

AFTER

Captain Picard's Ready Room

Leo remained in her office during the ritual of command exchange, manufacturing an excuse of some nameless glitch in Jellico's transport arrangements that had to be corrected. Both captains knew she was lying through her teeth. Neither saw fit to call her on it.

The doors hissed open and closed.

"Ah, it's good to see my fish is back in once piece."

Leo sighed inwardly at the familiar voice, in its familiar place, its resonance only a little weakened. Fighting the urge (god, she'd been fighting so many recently) to rush out, Leo walked calmly to the outer ready room to stand in front of the captain, where he sat once again at his (his) desk, and echoed, "It's good to see you're back in one piece."His eyes were hollow, he was underweight. No bruises or scars, of course, except those Troi would help him with. She paused for a heartbeat, looking deeper than he probably liked, and added, "Mostly."

"Oh the pieces are all here, I assure you," Picard smiled a bit awkwardly. "Just some fine-tuning and adjustment to attend to."

"So Captain Jellico's off, is he? I wasn't trying to be rude, really."

"Understood. He wanted me to tell you he was wrong about you."

"Sir?"

"He told me he experienced much less friction with the crew than he originally expected." He entered the log deactivation code. "I never told him he was enjoying the services of a courageous decoy."

"Quack, quack, sir. My parts are all here too, fine-tuning and adjustment already underway."

After the incident had been resolved, she'd been given leave to explain to her senior command crewmates. Will Riker had been particularly affected by the knowledge.

"My god Leo," Riker had told her in the privacy of her quarters, "if I'd known… hell, I should have known, shouldn't I?"

"Well I have to admit you got off a few good shots," she gripped his arm as his expression grew more shamefaced, "but hey, if you had known, I wouldn't have been doing my job. Besides I figure if I could fool you, well watch out on poker night Commander, that's all I can say." She paused and added, "Really, we all did what we had to do, we're smart enough to know there were no heroes here, not even the captain. Victims of Federation circumstance aren't the same as heroes." The last comment was delivered with a bitter edge.

Now, she and Picard engaged in their usual shadow-boxing of self expression.

"If I could, Lieutenant, I'd recommend you for a commendation," he told her.

Leo almost laughed. "Con artistry isn't exactly distinguished bravery. Besides, as far as most of the Federation is concerned," here she leaned forward and whispered conspiratorially, "it never happened."

"More's the pity." Picard rose and extended his hand. "There are many kinds of 'distinguished bravery', Lieutenant. You managed several of them, at what price I can't pretend to imagine. That deserves to be acknowledged."

Leo took his outstretched hand and held on for just a moment. "It was a worthwhile investment, sir." She withdrew and stood ready for his next order. "So what's first on the agenda?"

Picard handed her a PADD. "Download my report and add it to Captain Jellico's log."

"Shall I draft a framework for presentation to Starfleet Command?"

Picard sat down and consulted the prioritized list of communications awaiting his reply. "Make it so."

"You got it." She took off for her office, and was stopped by the chill of a (slightly) disapproving voice.

"Lieutenant?"

"I mean, Yes Sir."

Gods, he thought, it's good to be back.