Billy pushed himself through the front door loudly, interrupting Jacob's and my somewhat intimate moment. He gave me a curt nod before turning into the living room, obviously displeased with my presence in his house. I sighed heavily as I pushed myself up and away from the table in one continuous movement. "I'm going to go for a walk," but before I could turn Jacob caught my wrist solidly.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You can't go alone, Sam's rules," his eyebrows jutted up, sympathetically. "I'll make Billy's plate and then I'll meet you out front," he released me wrist as he pulled himself out of the chair. I turned to walk out of the door, but before I could take more than a few steps I heard Jacob called "don't try to run anywhere, I'll catch you."

I rolled my eyes as I stepped out into the cold night air. A car sped by, kicking up water on the street ahead of me. I could hear the music flowing out of the car as it disappeared into the night.

Oh
I say I did and always searching
You can't fuck with fate
So, instead you'll taste my pain.

The words struck me in the chest as they washed over me. I took a few steps as I replayed the lyrics in my head, echoing back and forth in my head. Behind me, Jacob stepped out of the small house. He was as my side in no time, as I shook off the feeling the music had given me. Things had a whole new meaning now that I was a vampire.

Jacob put his hand on the small of my back as we walked, his heat warming me up steadily. "So where are we heading?" He questioned, jumping a head of me a little. I giggled.

"I don't know, why don't you tell me?" The excitement in his eyes was unmistakable, this was MY Jacob. He babbled aimlessly as we walked, talking about how Quil and Embry were dealing with being werewolves, and how Sam was planning on proposing to Emily soon. The most unbelievable part was when I realized I was enjoying myself. I giggled and laughed as he imitated his brothers, making faces and sounds shamelessly in the night.

"So Sam had to break them apart, then out comes Leah with a rolled up newspaper, and she just up and smacks Quil in the face with it," he gasped for breath, stopping to rest his hands on his knees, doubled over in laughter. "That's not even the best part, after she hits him, she screams 'bad dog!' and walks right back into the house. None of us had any idea what just happened, and poor Quil," he paused again, hooting and hollering in laughter as we stood in the middle of the street. "Poor Quil didn't know what to do with himself, he just stood there muttering about," he coughed abruptly. "Well, just muttering about female werewolves," he smiled at me impishly, trying to hide his masculine nature in front of a lady.

I laughed, truly laughed at his story. He smiled along with me, placing his hand again on my back as we began walking again. "That's hilarious," I managed to choke out through my hysteric laughter. Slowly, both him and I calmed down and managed to keep our antics down to a minimum as we ambled along the dark streets of La Push.

"Bella?" He asked lightly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure you can." I flashed a toothy grin at him as he peered at me.

"What is it like, to want blood?" His question shocked me. My head whirled. I couldn't talk to him about this, it was dirty; my desire for blood. It wasn't something to be proud of; it was something I needed to hide from everyone close to me. Speaking of it to Jacob – of all people – just made it more real.

I opened my mouth once, only to shut it. We took a few steps in silence as I rearranged my thoughts. "Do you know what really rich, melted, warm chocolate tastes like?" I countered, cautiously. I peeked at him pathetically, gauging his reaction.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've tasted it at one time or another," he answered, biting his lip. "So you mean," he paused. "Blood tastes like sugary chocolate to you?" I nodded grimly.

"I know, I'm disgusting," I murmured. He caught my forearm in his iron grasp once again. He pulled me to face him; making himself level with me. His eyes smoldered a dark brown – even in the dark – I could see light dancing off his irises.

"Don't you ever say that again. You are not disgusting Bella," he shook my arm slightly. "I'm just curious and have a lot of questions about you, you're almost a whole new person now," his voice grew low as he spoke, as he contemplated something unspoken.

"Oh Jake!" I threw myself into his unyielding chest, wrapping my arms around him. My whole body shuddered as he pulled me closer into him. "I'm so sorry," I wailed, just like a little child.

"Hush, hush. You haven't done anything wrong Bells," he smoothed out my hair as he spoke into my skin. His breath filled my nostrils and the burning was gone, he smelled purely of forest and fresh dirt. It was refreshing amongst the chaos I usually inhaled.

"I'm so, so sorry," I cried into his chest. I wasn't actually crying, but my body was shaking with dry sobs as we stood there. Everything was so messed up; it was never supposed to be like this. Edward was supposed to be with me through this. This was hurting Jacob as much as it was hurting me, it wasn't fair.

I pushed myself away from his chest roughly, putting a small distance between us. His arms created a cage around me as I pushed harder against his embrace. "No, no no," I yelled. "This isn't right, I won't do this to you," I screamed even louder, thrusting my body through his arms, freeing myself.

I stumbled backwards – losing my balance momentarily – but regaining it quickly. Jacob was much quicker than I was, as he grabbed my shoulders and pulled my close to him. I struggled against his hold while he looked straight at me. His face softened for a moment, as we locked eyes.

Suddenly I felt his warm – almost fiery – lips against my cool ones. He crushed himself into my, pulling my body into his; locking me into another embrace as he kissed me hungrily. I gasped, astonished. As my lips parted his tongue eagerly explored my mouth. "No!" I mumbled against his lips, he could hit my venom coated fangs, I could kill him.

With all the strength I had, I hit his chest with two balled up fists; knocking him backward into the trees. He disappeared from before me quickly and quietly; seconds later there was a snap in the darkness that lay to the side of the road. An almost silent thud followed the snap. What had I done?

"Jacob?!" I yelled frantically, speeding into the forest. My vision immediately spotted his sluggish movements in front of me. He hit a tree a few feet off of the road, shattering its base. He lay in a lump on the mossy forest floor, moving every few moments, trying to gather himself. I was at his side instantly, grabbing his shoulders to pull him upright. "Jake, Jake, please open your eyes." I pleaded, holding his head up.

His eyes fluttered open. I sighed in relief. My mistake flooded my mind in seconds. My venom had no effect on him, that's how I was able to feed on him. He was in no real danger, it was just a kiss. "I'm so sorry, I thought . . . I thought I could hurt you with my . . . my venom." I hung my head, ashamed, both arms still holding Jacob.

Unexpectedly he pulled me into him, once again. My head fell onto his chest without a fight as he covered my small body with his arms. "I'm so sorry," I whispered into his skin. His chest rose shakily as he spoke.

"Bella, I'm fine," he took a deep – unsteady – breath. "You just hit the right spot, you knocked the wind clean out of me," he chuckled, his breath becoming a little more even. "Don't be upset with me, it was the only day I could get you to shut up about hurting me – before. Stop trying to be so selfless," he tightened his grip on my shoulders.

"Jake, how can I pull you into this mess? A mess I made myself, it's not fair . . ." I trailed off quietly; listening to his heart beat. I could hear the blood rushing though his veins, rhythmically.

"You think if I didn't want to be here, I would be? You just don't understand, I love you more than anyone. I'd die before letting you get hurt. Vampire or not, your stench is almost gone and I'm willing to make every sacrifice I can make, to take care of you," he paused, grinning in the dark – but he was far from finished. "I will let you feed of off me for the rest of eternity if it meant you could hold onto the shred of innocent humanity you have. I will never leave your side Bella, whether you're stronger than me or not, you are my responsibility. I will fight anyone and everyone to defend you, please don't ever forget that." He kissed the top of my head tenderly.

I snuggled into his chest, tracing his muscles lightly. "Thank you," I murmured. I closed my eyes and listening to the sudden bursts of blood whoosh through his body. If only he knew the sadistic, dirty thoughts flying through my head as I listening to his 'chocolaty' blood. A faint burning flared up in my throat, and I felt my mouth begin salivating with saliva.

Nothing would ruin this moment, not even my thirst. I clung to him helplessly. "Jake . . ." He rubbed my arm in response. Oh God no. "I'm thirsty," I whispered, as quietly as possible. I felt Jacob go ridged underneath my body. The burning moved to my lips, it felt like hot coals in my mouth – surrounded by poisonous venom. I felt another heartbeat come and go by my mouth.