Dear Diary,
I am very angry at the moment. The worst things have happened to me! I was standing on the deck of the Pearl beside Mr. Turner, and some crew member threw a bucket of water on me! I'm sure he didn't mean it, but if he didn't drink so much he wouldn't have missed! Somebody needs to whip this crew into shape. Norrington would have given that crew member a good flogging...
Then, I went to walk aft and my feet got caught in some rope, and I tripped right off of the ship! Lucky we were in port or I would have been keelhauled by accident. Possibly killed! It's unbelievable, really. Some people are always lucky and nothing bad ever happens to them. To continue on with what happened, I was hauled out of the water by the rope that was caught on m ankles. That was quite painful. Who couldn't feel pain if they were lifted by the ankles? I thought my legs were going to be ripped off of my body! I had better stop speaking about such things or I will make myself sick.
The worst of the worst things that happened to me was that I was hit on again! Not by some person who didn't know me very well, but that somebody was the same person who I was marooned on the beach with! They know very well that it would never work out. I've told you about the person already, right Diary? I don't like to speak of that person much. I'll go back to see if I have written anything about you know who...
That's strange. You're quite different today, Diary. Pages wrinkled, corners ripped...Even the signature looks different. I haven't mentioned the person, but I've mentioned myself in a very nasty way. Have I been hit over the head with something terribly heavy? I don't remember writing any of this. Not one bit of it. What in the world is a Thef Rench? Oh...Jack Sparrow's Pearlorific Eyeliner. If I had invented something called eyeliner, why would I put that dirty scoundrel's name on it? He's the same dirty scoundrel who went hitting on me... Oh, dear...Oh, dear...You aren't my diary! You're Jack Sparrow's journal! How did I get a hold of this?! ...If I have Jack's journal...Then he must have my diary!!!! I need to get it back! NOW!!! Oh, and I should rip this page out, too.
Having an even worse day than before,
Elizabeth Swann
I am very angry at the moment. The worst things have happened to me! I was standing on the deck of the Pearl beside Mr. Turner, and some crew member threw a bucket of water on me! I'm sure he didn't mean it, but if he didn't drink so much he wouldn't have missed! Somebody needs to whip this crew into shape. Norrington would have given that crew member a good flogging...
Then, I went to walk aft and my feet got caught in some rope, and I tripped right off of the ship! Lucky we were in port or I would have been keelhauled by accident. Possibly killed! It's unbelievable, really. Some people are always lucky and nothing bad ever happens to them. To continue on with what happened, I was hauled out of the water by the rope that was caught on m ankles. That was quite painful. Who couldn't feel pain if they were lifted by the ankles? I thought my legs were going to be ripped off of my body! I had better stop speaking about such things or I will make myself sick.
The worst of the worst things that happened to me was that I was hit on again! Not by some person who didn't know me very well, but that somebody was the same person who I was marooned on the beach with! They know very well that it would never work out. I've told you about the person already, right Diary? I don't like to speak of that person much. I'll go back to see if I have written anything about you know who...
That's strange. You're quite different today, Diary. Pages wrinkled, corners ripped...Even the signature looks different. I haven't mentioned the person, but I've mentioned myself in a very nasty way. Have I been hit over the head with something terribly heavy? I don't remember writing any of this. Not one bit of it. What in the world is a Thef Rench? Oh...Jack Sparrow's Pearlorific Eyeliner. If I had invented something called eyeliner, why would I put that dirty scoundrel's name on it? He's the same dirty scoundrel who went hitting on me... Oh, dear...Oh, dear...You aren't my diary! You're Jack Sparrow's journal! How did I get a hold of this?! ...If I have Jack's journal...Then he must have my diary!!!! I need to get it back! NOW!!! Oh, and I should rip this page out, too.
Having an even worse day than before,
Elizabeth Swann