What Are We Doing?
Brenda waited until Brandon had left the roof before calling out to Dylan, he still had his back to her and seemed reluctant to turn around.
"How is it then Dylan?" Brenda almost whispered, knowing her words would carry on the still air.
"What do you mean Bren?" Dylan sounded weary and Brenda got the feeling he was sick of her already.
"You told Kelly it's not how it looks. Well how is it then? What exactly are we doing?" Brenda's voice was calm, she hadn't come all this way for another showdown with Dylan.
"I don't know Bren, I think about you all the time, I buy theater magazines and read the arts section of the newspaper to see how you're doing. I guess what I don't think about is us, you know what would happen if you came back, if I'd still feel the same way."
"It certainly felt like you still have some feelings for me." Brenda knew she was giving him a hard time but she wanted him to come to his own conclusions.
"Yeah, and it felt good Bren, so good, but I don't know what I'm doing here. This isn't high school, she's my wife."
Brenda allowed herself a wry smile, "Well Dylan I can tell you something for nothing, being your ex-wife is worse than being just some girl you knew in high school."
"I've never thought of you as my ex-wife." Dylan's expression was pained he'd thought they were done with this years ago, the Brenda-Dylan-Kelly Bermuda triangle.
"That's what I am Dylan, ex-wife, ex-girlfriend, ex-lover." Brenda looked right into his eyes at the last word. "I need to know where I stand with you, where we go from here."
"You want me to decide whether or not to leave my wife right here and now?" Dylan asked incredulously.
"No, but I once asked you to give me something to come back to, and I have to know whether there's a chance that you did." Brenda walked up to Dylan.
"Bren," Dylan grabbed her by the top of her arm as she tried to walk past him.
"I can't make you any promises."
"It's a good job, you'd probably break them." Brenda pulled away from him and carried on walking.
As she slumped against the plushly upholstered elevator wall, Brenda realised she'd been fighting back tears, only now could she admit that the main reason she'd come back to Beverly Hills was that she wanted Dylan. He was like a drug and he'd been calling out to her for too long. Brenda let the tears fall, she wanted Dylan back.
Dylan watched Brenda walk away from him, stunned at what had just happened, it was like someone was playing a cruel trick on him, after ten years and everything he'd been through he was right back where he'd started. Torn between Brenda and Kelly. He thought back to the fateful summer before their senior year, when Kelly had made a play for him and he hadn't been able to resist. He'd hurt Brenda that summer and at the time he hadn't even cared, Kelly had been offering him something far too intoxicating to resist, she'd been offering a much simpler relationship to the one he was in with Brenda and he'd rushed into it without a thought. Okay McKay so what now? He asked himself, he'd known that there had been a chance he'd be running into Brenda tonight, even before Kelly had mentioned it. Just the thought of her had unlocked all his old feelings, they'd come back to him in a rush and he'd been stunned by their intensity. After all these years Brenda Walsh still made his heart beat faster and his throat feel tighter, made his hands itch with a need to touch her. The only thing he knew for sure was that if Brenda still made him feel this way there was something seriously wrong with the state of his marriage.