'Make Heaven Wait'
"Hey JT, I know its been a while since I have been here I'm sorry I just been really hard since you have been gone, everyone miss you so much we made a memorial for you after you died and everyone came out to say goodbye, it was so beautiful everyone cried even Spinner that's shocked us all" Liberty laughed a bit to hide to her pain "well today was graduation day, we finally got to say goodbye to the Degrassi forever but it wasn't the same without you, I…. I….. I ….." Liberty choked back the tears she finally realized her feelings " I miss you JT so much its so different not having you here, before graduation I was waking through the hallways and I came across the stairway which you first told me you were gay" Liberty smiled before getting a little angry " by the way that was low James Tiberius Yorke, how could you do that?, if you didn't like me you should have just said it" Liberty laughed at herself a knowing that she could never stay mad at JT for long " but even after that I still managed to like you, I don't know what it was about you JT but I just couldn't stop loving you" Liberty reached for the picture placed beside the tombstone and placed her hands upon it "I wish I could just have one more chance to see you again, hold you, kiss you or even just say sorry for that stupid fight we had, but what kills me is that when I found out you died a big part of me died as well and I don't think ill ever get it back, I think about you all the time and wonder how you are, I hope you are doing ok, I know you in a better place JT but I selfishly wish you were still here making all those lame jokes and pulling all those pranks we all miss you Emma ,Sean, Toby, Manny, Kendra everyone, you were one in a million and I was so glad to have know someone so special as you " Liberty kissed the picture before placing it back on the ground " you know I still have nightmares about that night I wish I could have done something maybe it was my fault in a way for walking out maybe if I had stayed you'd still be here, it been exactly 1 year since you have been gone but it seems just like yesterday….. "
Flashback
The doctor came out of the surgery room and walked towards them, her gaze fell on Emma as she turned around and said " I uh, I need to speak with a family member" Emma looked at her distressed "his grandma's coming but she will be a few hours" the nurse nodded and was getting ready to leave "wait" Toby's somber voice echoed " you can talk to me, I'm his brother" although they know that it wasn't true Toby and JT had seen each other through everything and the good, the bad and the ugly we all know how much JT meant to Toby so it wasn't necessarily a lie the nurse nodded and continued " his aorta was punctured it is a main artery and we couldn't repair the damage …… he didn't make it" they all stood frozen "what, your joking" Toby replied hoping that there was so mistake the doctor shook her head "I'm sorry your brother is gone" Emma stood stunned not being able to breath as if she had gotten the wind knocked out of her "he's gone " Toby repeated Manny burst into tears and anger built inside of Sean "I'll kill him, I'm gonna….." he said smacking the wall. Liberty ran over to the group with JT blood smeared on her dress "what happened? Is he ok? " she asked Toby "what did the doctors say?" she asked again when Toby didn't reply she called out his name "TOBY" Toby opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out his mouth turned to a frown and he clutched Liberty for support. Manny began to cry one more and walked towards Toby holding on to him for support Emma hugged Liberty and Sean placed his head down in sadness.
I see you smiling everyday
Looking back at me
Like nothing every changed
I swear I heard you call my name
But in reality it's just you picture in a frame
Why am I here
With out you
When there was so much left for us to do
How could the angels come so soon?
Soon after JT's grandmother arrived and Toby broke the news to her gently, Emma and Manny we huddled together in Sean's arms crying endlessly trying to come to terms with the loss, Liberty sat in the corner cradling herself quietly ignoring the nurses talking to her. The Santos's, Isaac's and Van Zandt's soon arrived to the turmoil in the hospital " Mom, Dad " Manny said as she pulled away from Sean's firm grasps to the arms of her parents "honey what's wrong" Mrs Santos asked "his gone mom he is really gone"
"what" Danny asked " JT died Danny, there was nothing they could do" Sean confirmed "oh my god" Ashley stated putting her hand on her mouth and looked at Toby. Toby nodded and walked towards his dad grabbing him in a bear hug.
Mr. Isaacs but his arms around his son and cradled him, Harold Van Zandt looked around for his daughter and his eyes set on a figure curled up in the hospital plastic chairs "Liberty" he murmur Liberty didn't budge her eyes were still glued to the floor and her held herself in the same position Harold and his wife went to their daughters side trying their best to comfort her.
If I could make heaven wait
I'd find a way to ask God if he had
Made some mistake
If he'd save you wings for another day
If only I could make heaven wait
Spike and Archie arrived to the news as well, Archie completely froze in his position not being about to understand why or how this tragedy happen " Lets go home" Spike suggested as she tried to pull Emma to the door , Emma hugged Manny, Sean and Toby and glanced over at Liberty who now wasn't responsive to anyone, Emma walked Liberty and gave her a hug she knew that this was gonna hit Liberty the hardest " Hang in there Lib, I promise we will get though this" Liberty nodded as he accepted Emma's hug and Emma left with her parent. Soon everybody left the hospital and went home but that night Liberty couldn't sleep cried the whole night through hoping that this was one bad dream that she will wake up from but unfortunately it wasn't.
end of Flashback
"It was like a train wreck for all of us" Liberty was now wiping hot tears that feel down her eyes staining her cheeks " we all could cope with you gone, especially Toby, you should have seen him, he was one of the worst" Liberty placed her hands one the tombstone and lightly traced around JT's name as she continued " I don't think her will ever recover with this loss but he is taking it one day at time, but you grandmother is taking it the worse, she was so sad all the time she barely eats anymore she is so frail
now, she miss you to JT she still has you room the way it was …"
All your clothes are hanging up
Not a thing been touched
I Left it all the same
Liberty smiled as she distinctly remembered JT room being some what of a pig sty "she left it all your clothes handing up, all your comic books under the bed and all your trash on the floor " Liberty sobbed holding herself from the breeze "just the way you would have wanted it, we didn't want to touch it not until we were ready to deal with your death, so it still the same 1 year on"
I wish that could press rewind
And go back in time
Just to see your face again
Cos I miss you
I need you
I'm so alone without you here with me
You are the reason that I breathe
" I just wanted to say I'm sorry JT I know its too late and your gone but I'm sorry for all the pain I have ever caused you, I'm sorry for being so hard on you, for being so cold" Liberty broke down entirely letting all her emotions get the best of her "I regret not telling you this sooner, I just want to go back to when you were still here, I wish I could go back just to hold you and tell you I'm sorry and to see you again, I need you JT I need you to tell me that everything is ok, that your ok "
If I could make heaven wait
I'd find a way to ask God if he had
Made some mistake
If he'd save you wings for another day
If only I could make heaven wait
And every night I search for your star
In the sky
Asking why oh why
Lord know I would trade in my life for a chance to say goodbye
Liberty sat just next to JT and remembered all the good times they shared before he had to leave
Flashbacks
"Hello everyone I am Liberty Van Zandt"
"Hey Liberty I'm Emma and this is Manny"
"Hi"
"I'm Toby"
"Hi Toby"
"I'm Kendra nice to meet you"
"You too"
Liberty looked at JT who was to busy looking at the 8th grade girls
"Hi I'm Liberty" Liberty said sticking out her hand for JT to shake it"
"oh yeah I am ummm JT" JT replied uninterested at all with Liberty's presents
" well nice to meet you too" Liberty said disappointed
"Hey JT, I was just wondering I have a spare tickets to the season final hockey game and I was wondering if you wanted to go" Liberty smiled brightly but JT frowned "not unless that other ticket is for Toby" JT replied rudely make she he got his point across to Liberty " well I was just thinking maybe we could go………" Liberty didn't finish her sentence she was cut off by JT " I don't like you Liberty not now not ever and by the way this four year crush you have on me is starting to get old" JT yelled in front of the whole cafeteria making everyone hear. Tears formed in Liberty's eyes and she ran off with Emma, Manny and Kendra behind her "your such a insensitive jerk James Tiberius Yorke " Manny spat in disgust. Afterward they found Liberty outside the school by herself " hey Lib" Emma spoke making there presents known " hey guys" Liberty said wiping away tears from her cheek " don't worry about JT, Liberty he is just a insensitive jerk who doesn't care about anyone" Manny tried to comfort her " well that easy for you to say Manny you have all the guys in the palm of you hand, Emma had Sean in love with her and Kendra and Toby are getting really close " Liberty sighed " No on is every going to fall for me" " that's not true" Sean's voice echoed the girls looked up to find Sean "what do you mean Sean?" Emma asked " well how about if I told you that I know someone who is really in to intelligent girls and likes you Liberty, he wants to ask you out " Liberty rolled her eyes "id say you lying to make me feel better " Sean laughed "nope its true I have this friend Towerz that is totally into smart girls and he has his eyes set on you Liberty" Liberty smiled " really" Sean laughed again and nodded, suddenly Emma, Manny and Kendra screamed "AHHHHHHHH" Liberty laughed and Sean covered his ears "oh my god Liberty your first boyfriend" Kendra squealed "oh my god I'm deaf" Sean said trying to unblock his ears " we have to find you something to wear" Manny jumped up and down, " and we have to do your hair " Kendra followed " and Makeup too" Emma stated " dolphin friendly of course" they all laughed the bell rang and went inside to finish the day
" Radishes, Radishes
Not so sweet
Red and round
And gross to eat
The have power and cruel little voices
Saying I run Degrassi you have no choices
Liberty sung before she walked out of the gymnasium furious with Mr. Ratich for ignoring the fact that a student had died in Degrassi and all Ratich wanted to do was push it aside "well that was a great song maybe I can have a reprisal in detention both of you" Ratich said to JT before walking out of the room. Later on in detention "well it could have been worse Ratich could had actually shown up " JT joked trying to lighten the mood Liberty shook her head " I really don't know why you're here JT I'm the one that sung the stupid song" "yeah but the look on Ratich' s face when he fired us, oh oohh" JT said savoring the moment Liberty sighed in defeat "not helping JT" " Yeh I know I'm sorry but you, the way you stood up to Ratich took a lot of guts, you were brilliant just brilliant I wish I could have done what you did" JT smiled " you know what I should have done" Liberty leaned in and kisses JT a few seconds later she pulled away she grinned and blushed a bit " I have crushed on you for four years" Liberty confessed JT smiled and kisses Liberty when they pulled away they both blushed furiously " my stomach feels a bit funny" JT confessed they smiled at each other and gazed in to each others eyes till the end of detention is was as if they were the only ones there.
Liberty sat in the passenger seat of the car with JT driving, she hadn't spoken to JT since she found out that JT had blurted out all of their sex life to his best friend Toby, Liberty sat frustrated with her hands in her laps looking out the window. "ok Liberty I said I was sorry what more do you want? " JT asked in frustration " I cant believe you would tell Toby something so private so meaning full , it was supposed to be between us" "I said I'm sorry Liberty" Liberty sighed "well maybe sorry isn't enough JT" Tension mounted as both Liberty and JT avoided each other "well sorry for apologizing" JT rolled his eyes "sorry my mistake I though you were old enough for us to have a adult conversation but I guess your not, I thought we decided not to tell anyone about this experience" Liberty shouted " " well I don't remember making that decision and maybe if you respect me Liberty we can decided on something for once " " we did, remember when we decided to use the king size condom the one that's slipped off ………… I'm pregnant" JT looked at Liberty forgetting that he was in a car or driving for that matter "JT" Liberty yelled as JT plummeted through the bus stop .
end of Flashbacks
"Life never got boring when I was around you JT" Liberty smiled "as much as I would loved to stay and talk some more I can't, Emma's mom is throwing us a huge farewell party for us and I'm already an hour and a half late, they are probably wondering were I am" Liberty got up from the ground and dusted herself off 'I'll come visit soon, I promise and ill fill you in about all the drama that's going on in our lives, take care of yourself JT and don't go causing any trouble up there" she laughed knowing that he probably has done it all already "I love you so much JT" Liberty kneeled over and kisses the tombstone "goodbye" Liberty walked away not looking behind her.
If I could make heaven wait
I'd find a way to ask God if he had
Made some mistake
If he'd save you wings for another day
If only I could make heaven wait
Song- Make Heaven Wait by Guy Sebastian