Emo Farm
Disclaimer: Ahhhh, Sai. If I owned him, he'd get so much more screen time. But I don't, so he remains one of the most ignored and mysterious characters Kishimoto-sensei's drawn. T.T
Chapter Eight
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"Greetings," Sai said, I come under the invitation and protection of one Gaara of the Desert, Kazekage of the Hidden Sand Village in the Country of the Wind. May I be shown the one called Gaara?"
Gaara made a motion with his facial muscles that would have raised an eyebrow had he one. "I'm Gaara. You mean you don't know what I look like?"
"No," Sai admitted, "Naruto-kun speaks of you all the time, but he has no pictures. Nonetheless, I've developed quite the…I believe the word is crush…on you."
"Oh," Gaara said, taken aback, "Wait…Naruto talks about me all the time?"
"I often have to talk about his penis to shut him up," the ANBU Root member replied seriously, "For some reason, he immediately gets distracted."
"Ah…I see. Why don't you com in?" Gaara said, finally finding his manners.
"Helloooooooooooooo," Hiroku said brightly, "You must be Sai! Its fabulous to meet you, welcome to Emo Farm and I'm you hostess, Hiroku!"
"I'm her brother/lover/assistant manager and the cook around these parts. My name's Hirari," a tall man in a fuchsia kimono introduced himself.
"I see," Sai smiled, "I'm afraid I don't really know anyone here…"
"Nonsense," Hiroku scoffed, taking his arm, "You know Sasuke-kun and Oro! That's a great start, and you'll get to know the rest soon enough! Murtagh!" she bellowed in a way that belied her size, "Come meet the new guy!"
Silence answered her.
"I'll go get him," Hirari sighed resignedly, "He must be raiding the fridge again…damn."
"Sasuke-kun
and Oro-chan are out training," Hiroku gushed, "But they'll be
coming in for lunch. Meanwhile, I'll help you unpack!"
So a
slightly amused Sai let her lead him to his room.
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"Very good," Orochimaru encouraged, paying his protégée a rare compliment, "You're getting better, and quickly too to be able to spar me for so long!"
Sasuke was slumped on the ground, knees folded under his chest and cheek against the cool, forgiving soil between the grasses.
"But I'm nearly out of chakra," he rasped, "I'm progressing too slowly…I wasn't even able to improve by twenty percent! This is too hard…much harder than I expected it to be…if you're this strong, Itachi could kill me with his little finger while sleep waking and watching porn!"
"There is nothing shameful about giving up," Orochimaru said almost kindly, overlooking the porn thing.
"If you feel shame, then it is shameful."
"Nonsense," Oro scoffed, "Farting is shameless, and you feel ashamed when you do it! If you can smother the shame then you need not fear anything. Itachi is stronger than me, much stronger. Quite possibly stronger than Sesshoumaru-san. No one would judge you if you let your petty grudge go."
Sasuke raised a crimson eye to shoot his sensei a deathglare. "I would judge me. Besides, I'm not a coward! I will avenge my parents, its not a petty grudge!" he spat.
Orochimaru rolled his eyes. "That's disgusting, and it's your funeral. But while you're listening, let me tell you: pride is something you should acquire once you have the power to beat the living daylights out of those who offend it. At your age, with your strength, its only a weakness, an obstacle in your quest for power. Itachi knows this. Itachi has pride: he will not even think of fighting you as of now. Unless you gain the power to have pride, he will not harm you. And there lies your greatest advantage, if you can figure out how to use it. But remember when I tell you to forget every stupid moral Kakashi and those other Leaf idiots taught you…remember when I ask you to use…controversial training methods. Remember when I call you a pathetic idiot and wet behind the ears (both of which you are by the way) remember that you have no need for pride right now. If you don't need it, cast it aside, mm?"
"Your lectures last forever," Sasuke complained, but there was a new spark of determination in those once again onyx eyes.
"Hmmm. Now lets go back, I'm starving," Orochimaru said, hiding a smirk of satisfaction.
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"Sasuke-kun."
"Sai?"
"Ah, how nice to see a friendly face," the serene boy sighed politely, "Hiroku-san is amiable, but it is you I have sought."
"Why?" Sasuke said as he wolfed down his lunch.
Sai took a small bite of chicken, chewed, swallowed and drank a sip of water before replying, "I have no idea why I'm here."
"Didn't Gaara explain in his letter?" Sasuke said around a mouthful of rice, "You're here 'cause Hiroku wanted a female companion."
Sai winced as a blob of rice landed near his plate. "But I'm not female."
"You're
close enough."
Sai wasn't sure how to reply. The books he'd
read told him to doubt one's gender was an insult, but his
experience with Naruto told him that that tone of voice was about as
friendly as a boy would ever get.
So he wisely decided to withhold judgment, and stay mum.
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"Hey
Murtagh!" Hirari called out, "Come here, help me with the garden
for a bit!"
"Aw man," Murtagh whined, "Ok, only for a
little bit though."
"I wanted to talk…don't you think that Sai is awfully curious?"Hirari asked.
"I'unno, haven't really talked to him. He seems really nice though. Came up to my room and wanted to know everything about me."
Hirari
threw a sunflower seed at him "That's what curiosity is,
baka!"
"Oh. Right. Well yeah, I'd say he was pretty
curious. Ended up asking me about my thing, if you know what I mean."
Hirari frowned. "Your what?"
"My schlong," Murtagh said darkly.
"I don't…"
"My penis you idiot!" he cried, exasperated.
"Ahhhh. You really should have just said so."
"Well you should've gotten a clue," Murtagh sniffed, affronted.
"Alright, sorry, don't strangle my plants!" the other man said hastily.
"Oh, oops."
"Hmph."
"Hey," Murtagh said suddenly, squinting into the sun, "Who is that?"
Hirari squinted too. "Looks like…"
"Itachi!" they chorused. The Akatsuki member smiled wanly down at them, and they laughed.
"How'd it go with Aikawa?" Murtagh demanded, looking around as though expecting her to pop out of a dimension portal.
"Awkward. Let us go indoors, and gather Hiroku, Orochimaru and my brother, I don't want to have to repeat this," the sharingan genius said.
Murtagh scampered away to fetch the others, and Hirari set out oolong tea for them in the comfy parlor.
When everyone was settled, (Gaara and Sai introduced), Uchiha Itachi began his tale.
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Gwahahahaha! Cliffhanger! Keep hanging folks, and wait for the next chappie. Un!