50 years later….
We sped through the eerie flashing green, that I could now make out as trees. Everything here seemed so alive, it was just plain strange. I missed Massachusetts already. I let out a deep sigh. Adrien and I were here…once again in Forks, after 50 years. My dead heart was throbbing, all the memories I had learned to bury, all coming back now. One's that I just wanted to be released, never to be seen again. The first decade had been excruciatingly painful. Every moment my thoughts had been filled with, "Would they have accepted me like this?" "What was happening with my family and friends? Had they died?" I held my husband's hand tightly. In all this time Adrien had managed to help me forget everything, but now it was back. I tried clearing my mind, thinking of happier times. I knew how much pain and frustration I'd caused him. I had dragged him down with me in my personal hell…he was the only temporary relief. Adrien was and is my drug, without him I would kill myself.I thought of happier times, times that as human had been happy.
Walking down the aisle in a pale white dress, meeting my fiancée in the front. Taking his hand in mine, taking our vows. Charlie cheering, my friends happy that I was happy.
Another flash.
Moving into our new house in Massachusetts, having a view of the beautiful lake. Just the two of us.
And another….
Watching Adrien be the quarter back and help lead Forks High to an unforgettable victory.
More…
Being changed into what I truly wanted to be. Not feeling the pain because my personal angel was there by my side, making me think of nothing else.
And now here.
"B, are you sure you can face them?" His voice broke my thoughts, making me cringe. I'd forgotten that they were here too. I had to be happy, I wanted Adrien to be happy. So 'd go through with this, just for him. He deserved this. All the suffering I'd caused, maybe I could make it up. I shook my head. I could NEVER make it up. Even if I lived to be 1,000 years old I could never forgive myself for pouring out my true feelings even if it made things better for me.
"Yes," I whispered. "It's going to be okay." As I said the words I was trying to convince myself more than him.
"We don't have to do this now." His hand ran along my cheek softly….dazzling, knowing the effect he had on me, even with me as a vampire.
"Yeah, we do." I disagreed lightly, not wanting to have another argument. The last fight had been about whether I was ready. Adrien was STILL trying to convince me to wait.
"Adrien STOP!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, letting my voice rip through the empty house.
"Bella YOU'RE NOT READY!" He roared.
"WHAT DO YOU KNOW? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN THERE! YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME SO WELL, BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S BEST?" Adrien's face had crumpled, leaving me feeling awful for having said these thing. He knew what was best, even if I was stubborn enough not to admit it. I could see the deep pain in his eyes, if he could have cried, he would have. I had done it again and again. Letting my anger lash out at the only one who understood. There was no one else to yell at…only Adrien. "I'm sorry." I finally said, my voice scratchy, even from its usual softness. "I didn't mean that." I reached for his arm, but he pulled away.
"You're right. I don't know you. I was never there to know what you were like. We rushed into this relationship. I won't forgive myself for coming when you were broken, for letting him hurt you so much before. For changing you so quickly. For letting you not live, and making you leave, just to be with me." I had never heard him utter so many words.
"Stop blaming yourself 'Drien. It's not your fault. Understand that." I held his warm face in my hands, wanting to make him understand. Sometimes he was too much like Edward for his own good, it scared me. Had I only come to love him because he had picked up the pieces? And what would I actually do when I came back into Edward's life? Run into his arms? Betray Adrien?
Again these questions ran through my mind as they had that day. No, I decided. No, I loved Adrien and Edward didn't want me. "But…." I held my hand up interrupting him.
"Eventually, I will have to face them. And anyways," I shrugged. "I want to be friends with Esme, Carlisle, Alice, Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie." I left out one of the family. Even 50 years hadn't changed the bitter feeling inside me. "They were my family too. And I'd like another shopping partner." I could tell that Adrien was finally agreeing with me. I'd dragged him on all these trips, the Cullens had been right, there was nothing else to do when you had twenty-four hours a day to do anything.
"Fine." Adrien flipped open his new cell phone… the nokia 34684; touch pad, thought sensitive, the works.
"Wait." I grabbed his arm, causing him to swerve past another car. "Oops." I giggled, noticing the patch of dirt on the windshield. "Anyway," I blew it off. "Don't tell them I'm here. Just, I want to surprise them."
More like not give Edward a chance to run away when I CALMLY gave him the cold shoulder. Or more than that. Maybe make him feel like crap.
"No problem." I listened quietly as the phone rang. Block. Block. Block. I told myself. Make me invisible, a dark shadow. As I had so many times before. "Hello? Carlisle?" I listened to Adrien's smooth voice on the line. "It's Adrien."
Carlisle: "Oh Adrien, how are you? Are you and your wife coming up to visit?
Adrien: "Good, and yourself? We're actually going to unpack and then come, is that okay?"
Carlisle: "Why not come down now? Edward's anxious to see you and the rest of the family is really excited. Alice and Rosalie are itching for a new shopping partner. Hopefully she likes to shop?
I could see Adrien's wide smile. We'd been alone to long. I could see it in his eyes everyday, how he wanted to be around others. Sometimes I KNEW I wasn't enough.
Adrien: "She loves shopping. I can ask her now, she might want to unpack first. Hold on."
I nodded at him. However, being referred to as "she" was about to stop. This was going to be interesting.
Adrien: "Yes, she agrees. See you soon."
I laughed, "This is going to be SOO much fun." I flipped my chocolate-blonde streaked hair.
"Bells," Adrien's eyes turned serious. "Relax and don't get too upset. Just ignore him, okay?" Do this for him. I told myself again.
"Sure Adrien. He's the one that left me. I can ignore him, he's dead to me." He raised his eyebrows. "you know what I mean." I slapped his arm.
We pulled into the long gravel driveway. In all these years nothing had changed. I clutched my stomach, remembering everything that had happened…My eighteenth birthday in particular.
"B- um…honey, are you okay?" Adrien pulled over, waiting for me to respond.
I let out a small, but painful nod. "Block your thoughts." I choked out. "Please."
"I KNOW." Adrien started the car again, pulling up right behind a new shiny Volvo. This one was black and a six seater. I could just guess who's car it was. I clenched the door handle. I stepped out of the car hurriedly, not giving Adrien a chance to open the door for me. I had expected a welcoming committee, but nothing, I wanted it this way. It would be easier. He knocked on the door, barely making a patter on the oak.
"Adrien!" Carlisle smiled, hugging his "son". I hid behind him, waiting to see his reaction. "Esme darling come to meet Adrien and his wife!" He called. His eyes darted to me and widened.
I let out a tiny laugh. "Shh.." I winked and held out my hand. "Nice to meet you." Carlisle seemed to have been lost for words.
"Adrien, so nice to meet you." Esme pulled him into a motherly hug. Same old, same old. I thought.
"Nice to meet you to." Adrien mouthed against her cotton shirt. "This is my wife." Her arms dropped as she stared at me blankly.
"BE-!" I cut her off again.
"Nice to meet you. Please don't say anything." I muttered, my voice not audible to the people in the other room.
"Umm," They both seemed flustered. "Come meet the family?" I heard the Octocube blaring from the other room. (an xbox from 50 years from now.) Adrien took my hand, squeezing it lightly. "This is Emmett and Jasper." The two boys looked up from the game they were playing. I took in a deep breath. Exactly the same from all those years ago. What had I expected? Middle-aged boys? I covered up a dry sob by letting out a cough. Stay strong. Stay strong. Stay strong.
"Adrien dude!" Emmett boomed, waving to Adrien. "We've heard so much about you! I'm Emmett!" I let out a tiny smile, same Emmett too.
"Hey!" My husband grinned what I called his "jock" grin.
"Jasper." Jasper nodded in our direction, returning his attention to the game.
"And this must be your wife." I wiped my hair away from my face, taking away the curtain of hair. His jaw dropped and Jasper looked up at the sudden change of emotion. I felt myself crushed against Emmett's chest. "I don't…believe it!" He stuttered.
"Oh my god." Jasper hugged me lightly, pulling away. "I just…how?"
"ADRIEN!" Alice shrieked, running down the steps. It was just like Alice to treat everyone as family. "I'm Alice!" She was jumping on the balls of her feet.
"Uh, nice to meet you?"
"Don't worry Bro, Alice is just a bit strange, but she's good at heart." I snickered and he eyes averted to me.
"I…" I laughed loudly, this WAS hilarious. I bet they thought they'd never see me again. Well they were WRONG.
"Nice to see you again Alice." I looked down. She probably hated me.
"How? I should have seen…" Her eyes turned three shades lighter. Her arms wrapped around me. "My best friend's back. I don't care how…"
"I block." I stated. They all nodded in comprehension.
"That explains the dark shadow that was in your place."
"Is Rosalie here?" I questioned, trying to sound eager. She seemed to read right through my words. The question was more. "Is Edward here?"
"Yeah, and so is…Edward." I let out my brightest smile.
"I can't wait!" Esme and Carlisle had reentered the room.
"Edward! Nicole! Rosalie! Come down!" Esme's smile darkened. She turned to us. "They decided to wait upstairs, since you two came late."
"Sorry." I apologized. "We had trouble finding the house." I directed my attention towards the stairs. I looked at Rose calmly. "Hey Rosalie"
Rosalie entered the room, her eyes blazing. "She's back. Great." I rolled my eyes. Nothing EVER changed.
I looked at Edward. He came down the steps holding a human girl in his arms. Adrien's arm tightened around my waist. How DARE he, go back and get a human? Ruin her life too? Anger boiled within me, I felt waves of calm wash over me. "Thanks Jasper." I said gratefully. He nodded, sitting on the coach. Edward placed the girl lightly on the coach, as he had with me all that time ago.
"Adrien." The boyish grin I used to love played across his features. "Long time no see!"
"Yeah definitely." It was like watching two brothers be reunited. I wanted to smile, rejoice for my husband. But somehow I couldn't. I wanted nothing to do with this…this devil standing before me and Adrien and him were like best friends again.
"This is your wife…" His voice trailed off as he stared at me bewittled. His eyes darkened. Different features played in his eyes. Pain, sadness, confusion. There was no reason for the pain and confusion to be there. Maybe he just felt bad. "Bella Swan?" He uttered.
"Bella McKaye." I corrected, answering with a tight smile. "But yes my maiden name is Swan." Take that Edward Cullen. That's what you get for ruining me. The tension between us grew as we stared each other down.
Esme cleared her throat. " Maybe we should sit down?"
"Sure." I said sweetly, sitting next to Adrien, the farthest away from Edward possible. Just his scent made me want to throw up.
"So um Bella…Adrien." Carlisle didn't seem to know where to start.
"It's nice to see you again." Jasper put in. I glared at the girl, Nicole. I knew what everyone thought. That I was jealous. It wasn't jealously, just anger, and pity for the girl who probably loved him as much as I had. There was a long silence. I stared at the blank tv.
"What they mean is what happened to you after…we uh left." Emmett let out.
"Nice way to start a conversation Em." Edward muttered, his arm wrapped around Nicole. "She probably doesn't want to talk about that."
"Oh, I really don't mind, we can't get reacquainted if the blanks aren't filled in can we?" I responded, trying to keep the acid in my tone out of it. Adrien cast me a glance. I could read his eyes. Relax. Don't get angry.
"So what did happen after we left Bella?" Alice asked, putting her arm around my shoulder protectively.
"I uh…" I paused. Where to begin? "Well…where would you like me to start?"
"From the beginning dear." Esme said kindly, I owed her so much, all the times she had cared about me.
"Well, after you all left," I cleared my throat, all eyes were on me. "I got lost in the forest outside my house. I was later found by Sam Uley. He found me barely conscious and brought me home." I enveloped myself in the painful memory. "For a few days after that I was sick. The flu, if I remember correctly." I paused, remembering the faraway conversations in my mind. The people in front of me, me not understanding. "I stopped talking, and Charlie had my mom come from Florida to take me home." I screwed my eyes shut, fighting the thoughts. "I fought, throwing my clothes everywhere, refusing to go. Everything was always faraway, and I stopped caring." I hung my head. I heard Edward's sharp intake of breath. "For months afterward I lost everything. Everyone that cared gave up." I looked into Adrien's eyes. "But then Adrien came into my life." My husband shifted position. " He helped me get better, he was the only one who understood. He helped me get through everything. He fixed me when I thought I was unreparable. And then we got married and moved to Massachusetts." I told a short version. Not wanting them to become guilty. I heard the birds outside chirping, no one had moved. The silence was maddening. I turned my attention to Nicole and Edward. "Glad to see you found a new "infatuation" Edward." I shook my head in disgust. "Are you going to hurt her too?" Silence. His eyes shone with anger.
Rosalie stood up, her body reflecting rage. "How dare you? After what you did?"
"What are you talking about?" I snarled, my fury uncontainable.
"You tell OUR brother that you HATE him and that you want a NORMAL life and then when he FINALLY finds happiness you ruin it?" Her frustration was peeling off.
"Rose, now isn't the time." Edward muttered.
"EXCUSE ME? WHERE THE HELL DID YOU HEAR THAT?" I practically screamed. I pinched the bridge of my nose. Calm. Calm. Calm. Relax.
"That's what you did didn't you? Don't lie." Alice said quietly all her cheerfulness gone.
"Where did you hear that?" My voice came out in monotone. I knew who had said it, who had lied. "You are such a coward." I let out a sickly laugh. "You lied to them because you were too afraid that they'd throw you out? God Edward. I knew you were stupid but I didn't know you were a liar too."
"Shut up Bella." Edward growled in my face.
"Your telling me to shut up? You LIED to them and your telling me to shut up?"
"Would one of you mind telling us what your talking about?" Jasper's serene mask was breaking. Adrien glanced at my face and then at Edwards. I could tell that he wanted to keep the peace. But that wasn't going to happen.
I lowered my voice. "What did Edward" I spoke his name as if it was a curse. "Tell you?"
"Exactly what happened." Rosalie's eyes narrowed. "That you chose to leave him because you thought he wasn't good enough anymore. That you were tired of hanging with the "vamps" and that you wanted us to leave you alone."
"Are you crazy?" I shook my head from side to side. "Do you even KNOW how broken I was after you all left? Do you KNOW what he told me to make me leave?" No response. I filled in the blank. "He said I was an INFATUATION and that things had gotten too much out of hand. He said that he DIDN'T love me." I could still remember the exact words from that day. I just didn't want to remember them.
"Is it true Edward?" Carlisle rose from his position. The stupid coward didn't respond.
"I'm sorry," I stood up, wiping my dry eyes. "I thought I could deal with this calmly but all I've done is cause problems. I'm just going to go home. I'm sorry I've imposed." Adrien stood up. I pushed him back down. "Stay Adrien. Have some fun. You need some guy time." I tried to find some sort of good thing in this happening. I couldn't even smile. The phrase I'd always heard seemed to be swatted away, Just smile and there's nothing you can't overcome. Not in this case at least.
"B,"
"Stay," I insisted. "I'm just gonna go do some shopping or something."
"I'll come with you next time Bella." Alice smiled.
"Sure," I sighed heavily, opening the door.
"See you soon Bella." I heard Emmett call. Stay together. I told myself. At least until I get home.
PLEASE DON'T HATE ME!!! I didn't mean to skip forward 50 years…I was torn between waiting longer and having them date and stuff and this…but that point in the story seemed perfect to skip…but there will be flashbacks throughout the story, so it will fill in the blanks…. This was 6 pages long…and I wrote it all in 1 DAY…geez…but thank you to BiteMeEdward7 and also to all of you who reviewed…
I PRACTICALLY HAD A HEARTATTACK WHEN I SAY HOW MANY REVIEWS I GOT FOR THIS CHAPTER!!
LOL…REVIEW…
CIAO,
SOPHY.
Heres an excerpt from the next chapter.
"Nothing," he shrugged. "You just have a tendency of stretching the truth and putting people against me."