When Love Isn't Enough
Chapter 4
A/N - Most of this chapter is in flashback, which is in italic.
"Daddy, don't leave. Don't go! No!" Katie and Jessica were both hysterical, watching their father possibly leave their life forever. Let's just say, when Seth and Summer told the girls about Seth's departure, it did not go well.
Flashback-
"Mommy, what's going on?" Katie asked during breakfast, noticing the awkward silence.
"Nothing." Summer quickly responded.
"Nothing? What happened before was nothing?" Seth said, wondering why Summer was lying to their children.
Katie and Jessica were confused about what their parents were talking about.
"Cohen, just shut up." Summer said, glancing at him.
"I didn't do anything. I just think we should tell them what's happening."
"What's happening?" Both said curious.
"Well, your daddy has a big mouth, why doesn't he just tell you. Seth?"
"Oh no Summer. That's okay, you can go, I mean, after all it was your idea."
"Can one of you please just tell us!" Katie said irritated, as Jessica nodded her head.
"Okay girls...Well..." Seth started.
"Well daddy... is... um..." Summer interrupted, but couldn't finish her sentence.
"What about daddy?"
"Okay. I'm just going to say it. Daddy is moving out." Summer said quickly.
Seth looked down, afraid of what his daughters' reactions would be.
"Why?!" Both girls asked sadly.
"Well, we though it was for the best."
Seth had to disagree. "No Summer. Not we, you!" Seth then walked out of the kitchen.
By now both girls were in tears.
"Why are you making him leave?" Sobbed Jessica through tears.
"Girls, it's for the best."
"No, it's not." They both cried one after another.
"But... we love him." Jessica said quietly.
"I know." Summer replied.
"If you know, then you wouldn't make him leave!" Katie screamed at her mother, tears streaming down her face.
"Do not use that tone of voice with me, young lady!" Summer screamed back.
Seth knocked on the door of what used to be him and Summer's room.
"Come in, Summer replied, hearing the knock, oh, it's you." She said again, hoping maybe it would be Katie or Jessica. She wanted to apologize for screaming earlier.
"Yeah, it's me. I just, um, wanted to know if you really wanna go through with this."
"Look, if this is one of your plans for you to get me to change my mind, it's not going to work."
"It's not, he responded quickly, I promise. My bags are already packed and I already called my parents and asked them if I could stay."
"What did they say?"
"They basically said, you are right. I should be home more often, and I let my family done too many times. So anyway, back to my question, is this what you really want Summer just say it, yes or no. if you say yes, I promise I will be gone within the hour. But Summer, this is our family's future we are talking about."
For a second Summer was going to say no, no, she wanted him to stay. Stay with their family and care for them and provide love for them every day. But, she couldn't bring herself to say that. She knew if she gave him another chance, he would screw it up again. And she couldn't let him do that. So, the answer was yes, yes, leave, we don't need you anymore. But the truth was, they did need him! So much. God, why was this so hard for Summer.
"Summer, hello?"
"Yes."
"Yes what?"
"Yes, yes I'm sure." She said slowly, swallowing a lump in her throat, fighting back tears. Seth was disappointed.
"Fine." Was all he could say, and walked out of their bedroom, possible forever.
Seth walked into Katie and Jessica's playroom, ready to say goodbye."
"Please don't leave daddy."
"Please!" Both girls kept saying.
"I wish I didn't have too. Believe me, if I could stay, I would in a heartbeat."
"Why is mommy making you leave?"
"Because, I'm never here for you girls."
"But we love you."
Seth smiled. "I love you too. But, you girls deserve better than me anyway. A person that will be by your side no matter what. Somebody that will never let you down. Just remember, I love you both." He said, then kissed their foreheads and left.
End flashback
"Don't leave!"
"I love you." He said, while closing the door behind him. Every step he took away from the house, lowering the volume of the girl's loud cries.
Summer came downstairs, realizing Seth left. She felt bad for her daughters, though, it was for the best... wasn't it?
"Hey girls, it's gonna be okay." She said in a calm, soothing voice.
"No it's not. How can it ever be the same? You kicked daddy out!" Katie said, hysterical.
Summer tried pulling both girls into a hug, but Katie pulled away. "Don't! Get away from me, She said while standing up, then continued, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!" She then ran up to her room, leaving Summer and Jessica behind.
"I don't hate you mommy."Jessica said, tears running down her face.
"Thanks baby but right now, I kinda hate myself."
The rest of the day was silent. Summer had both girls asleep and she finally entered her room. It felt so weird. Not that Seth was usually there anyway, it was just knowing he may never be in that room again. Summer made her way over to her drawer, pulling out a small book. It was a diary. None of her family knew about it. She wrote in it rarely, only if something exremelly important happened. The first time she had actually written in it was when she found out her parents were getting divorced. Quickly glancing over the first page, she remembered how she felt when her parents split and realized what her children were feeling know. Moving on further in the book, other memories flooded her head; when she and Seth first started dating, Seth sailing away, Seth proposing to her, the day Katie was born, the day Jessica was born, and other major events that happened. But, by looking over the pages she only realized one thing- most of her life consisted of Seth Cohen-. Had she really made the right choice? Summer decided to write an entry for today; this definitely consisted of a major event.
Dear Diary,
Wow, has a lot changed since I've last written to you. I think that today I made the biggest mistake of my life. Letting Seth go. I keep trying to convince myself that it was the right decision for our family, but now I am not too sure. The girls both hate me, even though only Katie has admitted it. But, I can't blame them, I hate myself right now too. It's just, Seth was never home and he kept making excuses and letting us down. At first I felt going on break was the right thing to do, now I am a bit hesitant. Especially remembering my reaction to when my mom left me. I was 13 and it hurt that bad, they are only 7 and 4. It really hurts, having somebody you love that's been there for you your entire life just disappear. I want to give Katie and Jessie space, but I really want to talk to them about what happened. I am such a mess right now, and I have no idea what to do. I guess time will tell. Well, that's all for now.
Until next time,
Summer
Summer slowly closed the diary, placing it in the drawer. She then noticed a picture of her and Seth from their wedding day. She picked it up and stared at it for a good few minutes.
"I love you." She said, then finally placing it down. She then turned off the light and lay down in her empty bed, wishing it wasn't empty.
A/N - I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please Review: )