Disclaimer: Twilight is owned by Stephenie Meyer.

EPOV.

Sighing, I listened as my publishers tried to get me to do a book signing. "Just one? We could do it in your hometown or something!"

"No. I wrote a book, you published it, it's a huge seller, your company made tons of money, just be happy with that." I knew they wouldn't listen.

"Mr. Masen, we ARE happy," a man named Kurt was telling me. "And so are your fans. But can you imagine how sales would sky rocket if you made a public appearance? You can't honestly tell me that you'd rather NOT make all of that money."

"Actually, I can." My family had more than enough money as it is. "I understand that your company, however, can't honestly say that. But there was nothing in our contract saying that I had to make public appearances, and I'm sticking to that. I wouldn't have signed with you if I had known you would do this."

Kurt hesitated. "Are you positive that's what you want Mr. Masen?"

"100 percent," I told him genuinely.

"Alright then. I suppose I'll talk to you at a later time. Have a great afternoon sir." And with that, he hung up.

Alice entered the house then, with a large stack of letters in her arm. "Edwaaard! You have fan mail!" I had only moved back in with my family a matter of weeks ago, and their happiness was already beginning to get to me. Why could they be so happy when I was still so miserable?

"Throw it in the trash, Alice," I muttered under my breath. I knew she still heard me.

"Edward Cullen!" She exclaimed. "These are your FANS! Some of them might even be able to relate to you. Why would you just throw their admiration away?"

I glared at her. "Because it means nothing to me. I didn't write this for them, I wrote it for myself. If they like it, then good for them. But. I. Don't. Care." I annunciated every word of my last sentence carefully.

She sighed and left. She knew better than to argue with me at this point. I heard her wander down stairs and talk to Jasper. I blocked her thoughts out of my mind, and focused on the music that was coming out of my stereo. The CD ended, and it switched to Debussy. I quickly changed it to something less painful to listen to. I thought I had thrown that out.

I heard Alice let out a quick gasp from downstairs, but I continued to ignore her thoughts. Knowing her, she was probably upset about some clothing line's discontinuation.

However, no matter how hard I tried, I could still hear some things she was saying and thinking. I heard the name "Bella" and ran down the staircase at top speed, and was in her face in a second.

I didn't say anything, but she looked up at me sympathetically and whispered a small apology. I wondered outside to a small pasture far enough away that I couldn't hear them anymore. Before I got far enough away, however, I still heard Alice say "But it couldn't be Bella…she died years ago."

"She died years ago." The words haunted me while I laid in the field, desperately trying to forget the pain that ripped through my body. I felt a hole in my chest, as if a piece of my silent heart was missing. I wished again that the Volturi hadn't turned me down and immediately felt guilty. I could never hurt Esme or the rest of my family that way. I already hurt them more than they deserved.

Before I had time to think about what I was doing, I was running. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew that I wouldn't be stopping soon.

A/N: I was going to write this in Alice's POV, but I wanted to show at least a small part of Edward's pain. Alice's random thoughts of Bella will be explained later. Review for more chapters! :)