The One With The Wrecked Christmas
--Chapter 11--
THE ONE WITH ALL THE WEDDING PLANS
I hope you'll enjoy chapter 11! Hopefully after you read this you'll review it and leave me some comments (maybe u could tell me how to make this even better?) of course I thank everyone who's left me some comments already, I really appreciate it from all of u guys. Now, here goes Chapter 11.
(Continues where Chapter 10 left us off...)
--THREE DAYS AFTER CHAPTER 10--
(Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. The apartment is full of marked boxes while Monica and Rachel are sitting to the kitchen counter, in front of each other, looking down at Monica's wedding book thing (the pink one, remember?) discussing Rachel & Ross's wedding.)
Monica: Okay, now, do you wanna have lilies or roses? Lilies are more elegant but roses seem to have a sort of…touch.
Rachel: Well, I adore lilies.
Monica: (writing down) So roses. (Beat) Now, let's discuss food matters.
Rachel: Ooh, you read my mind. We got leftover pizza! (opens the fridge)
Monica: No, Rach, honey, I meant food matters at the wedding.
Rachel: Ugh, but I'm hungry.
Monica: Rachel, you have less than fifteen days to walk down that isle.
Rachel: Fine—(returning to her seat) But I like you less.
Monica: Now, I've already informed the staff at the restaurant of your wedding—
Rachel: (interrupting) Really? Oh, what'd they say? Were they surprised?
Monica: Well, a little. Now, anyway—
Rachel: (interrupting) What'd Marissa say? Was she annoyed, 'cause I think she's in love with Ross and now I'm not gonna use the S word but SLUT!
Monica: Rach…
Rachel: You're right, you're right. Sorry, I'm sorry. Back to the wedding.
Monica: Now we wanna talk about your dress.
Rachel: Oh, already have an eye on one. You guys saw it with me when we went shopping two days ago.
Monica: Yes, but you're not actually thinking of buying that, are you?
Rachel: Yeah I am, Monica, I love that dress. Why are you doing this to me?
Monica: Rach, it's too overpriced.
Rachel: Ross's paying!
(Phoebe enters)
Phoebe: Hey, you're never gonna believe this. I've gained two pounds.
Monica: Good for you, Pheebs. (quickly turning back to Rachel) Rach, you can't spend too much on a dress. Weddings cost a lot of money and you can't—
Rachel: (interrupting, to Phoebe) Aw, Phoebe, honey I'm sorry. I remember when that started happening to me when I was pregnant. Gosh, I freaked out. I even woke up Ross in the middle of the night just so that he'd tell me, "Rach, you're not fat."
Monica: Rachel…
Rachel: Oooh, goody! Monica, we've found our band for the ceremony! (points at Phoebe)
(Rachel is smiling, obviously serious, while Monica stares at her and Phoebe is smiling too)
Phoebe: Oh my god are you serious?!
Rachel: Are you kidding me? You're gonna be the best!
Phoebe: Yay!
(They hug)
Phoebe: Ooh, can I sing "Smelly Cat"?
Rachel: Sure, whatever you want.
Phoebe: Ooh-ooh, and "Smelly Cat Remix"? (Beat) And how about "How He Knocked Her Up"?
Rachel: Yeah, we'll talk later.
Monica: Rach, now comes the tough part.
Rachel: (sighs) Oh, no…
Monica: You have to pick a maid of honor.
Rachel: Oh, that's easy. Phoebe!
Monica: What?!
Phoebe: Really?
Rachel: Yeah. Oh, Mon, how about you just end up being my wedding-planner?
Monica: (smiles) That sounds good.
Rachel: Even though you have a history as being a bad wedding-planner.
Monica: What?!
Phoebe: (nodding) It's true, you do.
Monica: What're you talking about?
Rachel: Phoebe's wedding?
Monica: SHE WAS GONNA TALK ABOUT HER ENTIRE LIFE STORY!
Phoebe: Ok, Rach?
Rachel: Yeah?
Phoebe: As your maid of honor, may I have a maid-of-honor wedding-related suggestion?
Rachel: Sure.
Phoebe: (pointing at Monica) Kick her out.
(Ross enters)
Ross: Hey, what you—
Monica & Phoebe: No, no, no, no! Leave! Leave!
Ross: What? Oh, were you girls talking about me?
Phoebe: We're talking about the wedding, which you have completely no business in so leave!
Ross: What? C'mon, I wanna get in on some—
Phoebe: LEAVE!!
Ross: Okay! Okay! Fine, I'll leave. Just, uh, Rach… I called a couple of guys and they're coming later tonight to pick up your stuff.
Rachel: Okay, I already packed.
Ross: Alright. Bye, love you.
Rachel: Love you too, Ross! Sorry about the screaming!
(Ross leaves)
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Wow, so you moving in with Ross, huh? Such a big step forward.
(Rachel and Monica glare at her.)
Rachel: Pheebs, I'm getting married.
Phoebe: God, do you remember when we were all single? It was such a magical time. We were single, free, loose…
Monica: Crazy, desperate, stupid.
Phoebe: Yeah, but it was still a little fun too, right?
(Pause)
Monica: Well…
Rachel: Of course it was. Look, stop! Stop making me freak out alright?
Monica: Aw, someone having cold feet?
Rachel: Maybe?
Phoebe: Then why don't you take a hot shower to warm them up? We'll be waiting for you outside. (pushes her to the bathroom and shuts the door on her)
Rachel (voice over): Pheebs, I don't think that's what she meant by "cold feet".
Monica: No, no, no, that-that is what I meant. (writing down) Greene 1, Geller 2. (laughs)
(Scene: Monica and Chandler's living room in the big house. Joey is eating chips (his beer is on its way) as Chandler and Ross are entering from the kitchen with three beers.)
Ross: Here, Joey.
(Joey takes the beer and starts to put it on the coffee table)
(Ross and Chandler freak out)
Ross: Aahh.
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Coaster! (grabs a coaster and places it under Joey's beer) Y'know, Monica.
Joey: Thanks, man.
Chandler: (to Ross) Ok, so you're getting married huh?
Ross: Probably.
Chandler: You up for it?
Ross: Absolutely.
Chandler: Where're you taking her for the honeymoon?
Ross: How about the Virgin Islands?
Joey and Chandler: Ooh. Nice.
Joey: (smiling) Thinkin' about making it non-Virgin anymore?
(Ross and Chandler just stare at him.)
Ross: (to Joey) What're you doing?!
Joey: Dude, I'm crazy. I turned down Nurses.
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I got a question for you. Rachel took that pregnancy test; it turned out to be negative…
Ross: Thanks, I love remember such fond memories of my life. (has a sip of his beer)
Chandler: Wait for it. Then the next day, the two of you just disappeared. Then you come to us, saying you guys are getting married in seventeen days. What, what happened? Where were you and how'd you come up with the seventeen-days thingy?
Ross: I, uh, we just went out, thought about it and picked a random date. (has another sip)
Chandler: Don't give me the short, un-extended, not-true version.
(Ross sighs)
Ross: Fine, I took her to the planetarium…
(Flashback scene to a dark planetarium where Ross and Rachel are entering. Rachel is blind-folded and walking in first. Ross is helping her)
Rachel: Ross, where are you taking me?
Ross: You'll see.
Rachel: Can I take the blindfold off now?
Ross: There y'go.
(He takes it off and Rachel stands there, just staring at nothing. Completely dark)
Rachel: Oh, yeah, wow! Ama-zing!
Ross: Wait for it.
(In a few seconds, little light begins to appear and we can see lilies everywhere around the place, there are stars and it's completely breathtaking and very romantic. Rachel stares in awe and seems speechlessly shocked by the spectacular view)
Rachel: Oh my god.
Ross: This is where I've always imagined asking you to marry me…not in Monica and Chandler's kitchen.
(They share a laugh. Rachel is in tears)
Ross: Look.
(He points up and one of those chopper things are flying by carrying a sign that says "Rachel, Will You Marry Me?")
Rachel: (gasping) Oh my god.
Ross: I'm on fire to know your answer.
(They share a chuckle)
Rachel: (crying) I love you.
Ross: I love you too.
(They hug)
Ross: Let's get married. And soon.
Rachel: Ok, you wanna go to Vegas and get drunk again?
(They share a laugh)
Ross: Ok, not that soon.
Rachel: How about…in one month?
Ross: Twenty days.
Rachel: Ten.
Ross: Whoa, there's gonna be a lot of preparing.
Rachel: Fifteen.
Ross: Sixteen.
Rachel: Seventeen.
(A pause)
(They laugh.)
Ross: Let's get married in seventeen days.
(They smile and kiss)
(A beeper goes on)
Ross: Ugh!
Rachel: What is it?
Ross: It's 9-1-1 at the museum. I'm sorry.
Rachel: Go ahead. Ooh, let's get married at the museum!
(Pause)
Ross: Suddenly, Vegas doesn't sound so bad right now.
(Back to present time… Ross, Chandler and Joey)
Chandler: Ok, I didn't exactly ask for the long, boring, detailed version either.
Joey: Hey, Ross, why don't you guys get married at a museum? I could be, like, a tour guide and the dead dinosaurs can be your ring-boy and your flower girl!
(Ross just looks at him again.)
Chandler: That's just the beer and him turning down Nurses talking.
(The girls enter)
The Guys: Aahh! No, no, no! Leave, leave, leave!
The Girls: What?
Joey: You gotta leave, we're discussing some serious, serious wedding-stuff over here that you three have no business about.
Chandler: C'mon, leave.
Monica: This is my house!
Joey: Oh, you're welcome to stay then.
Phoebe: No, we're not stayin'. We're just here to tell you guys we're going out.
Ross: Out where?
Phoebe: Not to a bar or a strip club but to a Bat Mitzvah where do you THINK?
Chandler: You're going to a bar?
Phoebe: It's this lady's (referring to Rachel) last couple of days of single…hood.
Monica: We're goin' out to celebrate.
Rachel: Bye! (gives Ross some kisses in the air)
Ross: Love you, and be careful!
(The girls leave)
Phoebe (voice-over): We're getting drunk and laid tonight!
Joey: This is so unfair, if they're out at a bar why do we have to stick here listen to Ross talk about his second-proposal to the same woman?! Aagh, take me with you! (starts to run for the door)
Chandler: Joey!
Ross: Joey, no. (stops him) We're gonna get out and have fun. Just not yet.
Chandler: Yeah, we'll just wait till they leave… (a car engine is heard taking off) …grab your coat, we're going to a strip club.
(Chandler and Ross get up quickly while Joey rushes for the door before them.)
(The guys leave then Joey comes back in again)
Chandler: What?
Ross: Did he forget something?
(Joey rushes to the coffee-table, takes a gulp of his beer and puts his hand into the chips. He takes out a bunch of chips and they're falling down as he rushes to the door)
Joey: Go, go, go!
(Chandler shakes his head and shuts the door after them.)
(Scene: A bar. Monica, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting at the counter of the bar (seated in order from left to right, as stated before).)
Bartender: What can I get you girls?
Phoebe: Vodka!
Rachel: Phoebe, you're pregnant.
Phoebe: Diet Coke!
Bartender: And for you girls?
Monica: Same here.
Rachel: Yeah.
Bartender: (to Man) Three diet cokes.
Man: Oh, yeah that's hot.
Bartender: (to Phoebe, flirting) So, pregnant lady, you seeing someone right now?
Phoebe: Umm, not currently. But, but you should know, if you wanna go out with me, you should know that my breasts--(whispering) They can detect weather.
(Bartender seems stunned.)
Phoebe: That's right.
(He runs off)
Rachel: Awe, I'm gonna miss being single, all the fun and everything.
Phoebe: Me too. (smiles to herself)
(Rachel seems silent)
(Zoom in on Rachel's face)
(flashback to Rachel and Joey's kiss in an earlier chapter)
(Back to present time...Rachel was dreaming)
Monica: Rach, you ok?
Rachel: What?
Monica: Our Diet Cokes are ready.
Rachel: Ohh.
Phoebe: Were you dreaming of Ross?
Rachel: (chuckles) Ohh. Um, yeah. Yeah...
FADE TO BLACK.
Please leave me some reviews and comments about this! I hope you liked this chapter, hopefully you'll come in for chapter 12.
Chapter 12 will be published soon… :D plzz Review!! Thank u loads and I hope this was entertaining…
Rachel: ...I'm not gonna use the S word but SLUT!
This quote was actually said by someone else in an episode of Ugly Betty. Just to clear that up.