The One With The Wrecked Christmas
--Chapter 16--
THE ONE WITH ROSS AND RACHEL'S WEDDING (PART II)
a.k.a
THE LAST ONE
Welcome to the final chapter of TOW The Wrecked Christmas. This is part 2 of The One With Ross and Rachel's Wedding, also known as The Last One. I don't have to thank u all sooooooo much for your wonderful reviews that keep me captivated. Hopefully, you'll read some of my other (also upcoming) fanfics.
I'm not gonna keep you waiting any longer so…
Here's The One With Ross and Rachel's Wedding, Part II
(Continues where Chapter 15 left us off...)
Phoebe (voice-over): Previously on Friends.
(Scene: Central Perk. This is a scene from Chapter 14 "The One Before The Last One" The girls are there with Mrs. Green, Rachel's mother, talking.)
Rachel: This is once-in-a-lifetime thing. And he's supposed to be there, my father's supposed to be there. (cut to later) I just… (sighs) I-I can't believe this. If-if he doesn't make it to the wedding, if he doesn't come…I don't think I can talk to him again, like, ever. (she runs and exits)
(Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. This is a scene from the previous chapter, it's Ross's bachelor party.)
Chandler: (to Joey) You think he's still mad at you for telling his fiancé that you're in-love with her?
(cut to later)
Joey: Ross, I'm gonna get over her.
(Scene: Wedding Reception. It's the last scene from chapter 15. Monica is making sure everything's prepared, she has headsets on and she's neurotically crazy.)
Monica: (talking into her headset) What the hell do you mean? (listens.) What?! (listens.) Are you freaking kidding me?!
(Chandler approaches her)
Chandler: What's goin' on?
Monica: The best man's missing. (She walks away)
FLASHBACK SCENE … TWO DAYS TILL THE WEDDING.
(Scene: Monica and Chandler's place. There's a calm party going on: it's Rachel's bachelorette party. Monica is in the living-room with other people)
Monica: How many times do I have to say, use a coaster! (gives a woman a coaster)
Phoebe: (coming from the kitchen) Ok, Monica, I just got off the phone with the stripper and he's on his way.
Monica: What? Phoebe, we said no strippers.
Phoebe: What? What's fun about that?
Monica: We don't have to have a stripper taking off his clothes for us. We can just sit around, have some wine, talk about our lives and be very calm and enjoy a quiet party.
Phoebe: That's not a bachelorette party, that's a tea party!
(Rachel enters)
Monica: Hi!
Rachel: Oh, my god, I can't believe you guys threw me a surprise bachelorette party! I'm so shocked!
Phoebe: (whispers) Really?
Rachel: No, I kinda already knew.
Monica: So, Rach, welcome to the party. Have a seat, get comfortable.
Phoebe: Knock yourself out, this is gonna be one wild tea party!
Rachel: Oh, yay! (She takes a seat) So can I have a beer? Or something?
Phoebe: Oh, no, beer has alcohol… (turns to Monica, with a sarcastic face) and alcohol's not ALLOWED.
Monica: Some people are driving home tonight!
(There is a knock at the door.)
Monica: Ooh, I'll get it. (She opens the door for Mrs. Green) Mrs. Green! What a nice surprise! Come on in!
Rachel: Oh, no.
Phoebe: Now it's a party.
Mrs. Green: Oh, wow, what a nice party. This is very…weird, why is nobody drinking?
Rachel: (gets up) Mom, what're you doing here?
Mrs. Green: Rachel, what an inappropriate way to greet your mother. Monica invited me.
(Rachel turns around and gives Monica a glare.)
Monica: You don't have all that many friends!
Rachel: Mom, you need to get out.
Mrs. Green and Monica: Rachel!
Rachel: Look, the point of bachelorette parties is to hang out and be happy and I can't-I can't do that with you around here.
Mrs. Green: (Tiny-chuckle) Why…why are you—your father's abandoning you on your wedding day, and I'm the victim here?
Rachel: Where the hell were you all this time?! (There is a pause. People are now focusing on Rachel and Mrs. Green) Just—just please…leave.
Mrs. Green: Well…this is umm, a very well-organized party, Monica. Send your mother the best. I'll uh I'll be leaving now.
Monica: No, wait, Mrs. Green. Stay…just, stay. Alright? Rachel…she's just going through a rough time. Please stay, for me and Phoebe.
Mrs. Green: Well, alrighty then. (Rachel groans) So, where's the stripper?
Rachel: Oh god! (She walks away)
Mrs. Green: What? There's a stripper, right?
Phoebe: Oh, there's a lot of stuff in this party.
BACK TO PRESENT TIME … ONLY 2 MORE HOURS FOR THE WEDDING.
(Scene: Wedding reception, entrance room. Monica is running towards the door, from the inside, and Chandler approaches her)
Chandler: Question: why are we running like lost sacred dogs?
Monica: Chandler, quick. We have to find Joey before the wedding. We barely have 2 and a half hours left. Quick, search every single sandwich store in the city.
Chandler: Oh, right, because that wouldn't take a minute.
Monica: Use your gut.
Chandler: My gut?!
Monica: If Joey could be anywhere, where would he be right now?
(There is a pause.)
Chandler: (smiling) Amsterdam.
Monica: (smacks Chandler on the head) Think!
Chandler: Ow, ow and OW!
Monica: Chandler, you have 20 minutes to find Chandler.
Chandler: (chuckles) Or else?
Monica: I will kill you. (Pause) I will physically and literally torture you…with 8 straight hours of Ross's new documentary.
Chandler: (quickly) Joey'll be here in 10 minutes. (He runs out)
Monica: (smiles to herself) Excellent. (runs over to a flower-guy-arranger) Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Hold on! What do you think you're doing?
Guy: I'm arranging the flowers.
Monica: And you think that's the way to do them?
Guy: Surely that's the right way.
Monica: I say what's right or wrong.
Guy: Sorry. (leaves the flowers and walks away) Bitch.
Monica: I heard that!
Guy: Said it loud!
(Phoebe is walking with the prescription box in her hand.)
Monica: Pheebs, can you help me out here? (She's trying to properly arrange the flowers)
Phoebe: Oh, I'm sorry, Mon, I wish I could but I still haven't had lunch yet.
Monica: Phoebe, those aren't candy! This is medicine!
Phoebe: What does it…do?
Monica: If you take too much of it, you can be dehydrated, dizzy and almost very close to drunk.
Phoebe: Ooh, I would love to get drunk again.
Monica: (into her headset again) Ok, code blue! Code blue!
Phoebe: What's code blue?
Monica: An emergency.
Phoebe: There's an emergency?
Monica: Joey's missing.
Phoebe: Oh, well, where is he?
(Monica looks at her.)
Monica: I don't know! That's why…he's missing!
Phoebe: Shall I call the cops?
Monica: No, don't call the cops. Chandler's looking in sandwich stores, you check up in fast-food restaurants and I'll assign other people to other places.
Phoebe: Ok, ooh but Mon before I go can I ask? What do I get, if I find him?
Monica: Nothing!
Phoebe: Not even a reward? Gee, this is a fun game. (She walks out)
(Ross enters in his suit.)
Ross: Hey!
Monica: Ross! Hey, what-what're you doing here? You're getting married in less than a hundred and twenty minutes.
Ross: I came to check up on everything. Is everything alright? Is the bride here? Everyone's here?
Monica: Everything's fine, Ross. Rachel's just getting dressed, neither of you is drunk and I'm pretty sure Rach isn't a lesbian.
Ross: Great. (Starts to leave then returns) Wait, and umm, Joey? Have you seen him? I kinda need to talk to him?
Monica: (hesitant) Oh, umm, he uh yeah I just saw him a few minutes ago.
Ross: Great, I'll go look for him. (Starts to leave again)
Monica: Wait, wait! No, Ross, he's in his hotel room.
Ross: Ok… (Starts to leave again)
Monica: No, he's taking a shower.
Ross: I'll wait for him. (Starts to leave again)
Monica: He's naked in the middle of the room! (Ross looks at her weird.) It's weird, I know, but it's Joey. You know?
Ross: What…what's going on?
Monica: Nothing.
Ross: No, something's going on.
Monica: Of course something's going on. (smiling) You're getting married! My big brother's finally getting married…for the fourth time.
Ross: Monica…
Monica: (sighs) Fine, but don't freak out alright?
Ross: What is it?
Monica: It's Joey. We can't find him.
Ross: What?!
Monica: But it's okay, we got the best teams working on searching all over the city for him.
(Chandler and Phoebe return)
Chandler: Couldn't find him.
Phoebe: Too drunk to look.
Ross: So, what? He's just…gone? Just like that? He's not here? Not in his hotel room? He's not anywhere?
Chandler: I'm sorry, man.
Ross: I'm gonna go look for him.
Phoebe: Ooh, I'll come help!
Ross: No! (He leaves alone)
Phoebe: Somebody's cranky today.
Chandler: I would be if I was getting married. I mean, marriage is such an overrated issue. It's such an overwhelming process of… (sees Monica's staring at him.) …loveliness and wonderfulness, I love you. (kisses Monica)
Phoebe: I can't believe Joey's gone.
Monica: I know.
Chandler: I feel so bad for Ross. I can't believe Joey would do that, he's the best man! Who runs away on his best friend's wedding?
(There is a pause.)
Monica: You ran away on your own wedding!
Chandler: Hey, you're the one married to a Bing, you're screwed to death. (He walks away)
(Scene: A bar, the same one the guys went to on an earlier chapter. Joey is having a drink as Ross walks in and starts to look around.)
Joey: (to bartender) Another round.
(Ross sees Joey at the counter and approaches him then sits to his left. There is a pause and either men is saying a word.)
Ross: I screw up. I screw things up with Rachel, I always do. It's been 10 years. We've been going at it for 10 years, I'm a screwed person. I'm unstable and frankly, most of the time, I don't know what I want. Do I wannna be with Rachel? Do I wanna cheat on her again? Do I wanna be single again? It's been 10 years and I still don't know the answer.
(A pause.)
Ross: All I know is that I'm insanely in-love with her. And I have been, since the ninth grade. You all know that. I'm that kind of person. The person that tells his friends all his secrets. Rachel and I have gone through…a lot of stuff. There's history there, and sometimes I get scared. I get scared thinking, "God, what if she doesn't love me? What if she doesn't wanna be with me? What if it's me, it's always been me? What if I love her more than she does?" And then I think, "What if someone else loves her?" Then you pop up to my mind.
(Another pause. Joey is staring down at his new drink, Ross is just talking while Joey listens intently.)
Ross: You pop up to my mind and I know. I know that you love her. But we're best friends, and you're my best man. We're-we're friends and, and we're in love with the same woman. (Joey now looks up at his friend.) I have a chance with her, I'm marrying her. I'm supposed to walk down that aisle in 30 minutes but now I can't. I can't because now all I think while I walk down that aisle and grab Rachel's hand…all I know I'm gonna be thinking about is how this marriage will affect you.
(Another pause of silence.)
Ross: How it affects my best friend, my best man. So I'm stepping down. I'm being the best man, and I'm stepping down. I can't marry her.
(Ross starts to get up then Joey grabs his hand)
Joey: Wait.
Ross: Joey…
Joey: Let me buy you a drink.
(Ross, standing still, looks down at Joey who looks back at him.)
(Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Monica, Chandler and Mrs. Green are waiting in a small living-room.)
Mrs. Green: I can't believe my little girl's getting married.
Chandler: I can't believe she's getting married to Ross.
(Rachel, looking absolutely stunning in her white wedding dress, walks into the room from her bedroom. Monica, Chandler and Mrs. Green all stand up to greet her in awe.)
Monica: Oh, my god.
Rachel: (crying) Really?
Monica: I really mean it!
(The girls hug)
Rachel: (wiping her tears without ruining her makeup) No, no, no tears. No tears. This is a happy occasion. We're not gonna cry. Monica, we're not gonna cry on my wedding night.
Monica: (also wiping her tears…) Okay, okay…
(A pause)
Rachel: Oh what the hell!
Monica: OKAY!
(They hug again, crying)
Mrs. Green: Honey, darling, I'm so happy for you. I can't wait to see you walk down that aisle. (Holds Rachel's hands) Ross? He's a wonderful man, and I'm sure he's gonna make you happy.
Rachel: (crying) I know, I know mom. I know he will. I'm sure he will.
Chandler: Whoa, wait till the divorce comes. (The three women look at him, stunned.) I, I, I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't… (He leaves)
Rachel: So, Mon, is everything okay? Is everything ready?
Monica: Honey, everything's ready. There's nothing to worry about.
Rachel: Yeah? Ross's in his room? He got dressed?
Monica: He…yeah, he's in his room, honey. Or he's probably just waiting for you, y'know at the church.
Rachel: Right. I'm gonna go fix my make-up.
Monica: Okay.
(Rachel returns to her room.)
Mrs. Green: And I'm gonna go throw up in the toilet.
Monica: Okay. Have fun.
(Mrs. Green disappears into the bathroom.)
(Phoebe enters and Monica quickly looks at her, waiting for an answer.)
Phoebe: (Shakes her head "no") Sorry.
Monica: Ross too? It's enough that Joey's missing, but Ross too?
Phoebe: Yeah, Mon, I'm sorry. I looked everywhere, in every single library, the museums, all the dinosaur factories… (Monica looks at her) What, they're real.
Monica: God, this is a disaster. What are we gonna do?
Phoebe: Well, I know what we're not gonna do and that's telling Rachel.
Monica: Yeah, you're probably right. I mean, she'll just freak out. And she does not handle stress very well.
Phoebe: Apparently, neither can you. Were you crying?
Monica: No!
Phoebe: Yes, you were! You were crying!
Monica: Yeah, well, Rachel's mother puking in the bathroom!
Phoebe: Awe, really? Wow, now's it's a wedding.
(Scene: The bar again. Joey and Ross are still talking, and Ross now has a drink too.)
Joey: You can't do that, Ross.
Ross: Yes, I can.
Joey: Ross…
Ross: Joey, I did not come out here to argue.
Joey: She's the love of your life! You can't leave her waiting at the altar like that! (A pause.) Ross…
Ross: I'm sorry… Tell her I'm sorry.
(They trade looks and Ross has a sip of his drink)
(Scene: Wedding Reception. Monica is still nervous and prepping the wedding while Phoebe does her best to help.)
Monica: Ok, we still have like 20 minutes till Rachel starts going down that aisle so we have time. We can find them.
Phoebe: Monica, people are coming in. People are waiting.
Monica: We can find them.
(They trade looks.)
Monica: Look, I know my brother. He wouldn't do this, okay? He wouldn't do this. Not to her, not to Rachel.
Phoebe: I-I-I can't, this is-this is too sad. It's too sad, I can't watch… I, I can't watch her walk down the aisle with him not being there.
Monica: Phoebe, get it together. MIKE! (Mike approaches) Control her.
Mike: (to Phoebe) Honey, it's gonna be okay.
Phoebe: (sighs) I will control myself if she (pointing at Monica) gives me more of that candy.
Mike: Candy?
Monica: It's pills and she's suddenly a 12 year-old again. (to Guy, the same flower-guy Monica picked a fight with earlier) Okay, you! You know I don't like you, right?
Guy: Of course.
Monica: I want a distraction from you in 20 minutes if the groom doesn't show up.
Guy: A distraction? What kind of distraction? What do you want me to do?
Monica: Are you familiar with nude-stripping? (He stares at her surprised.) Here's 50 bucks. (She slips him some money)
(Chandler enters)
Monica: Chandler? Anything?
Chandler: I left him, like, 30 messages on his phone. Nothing.
Mike: Any word on Joey?
Chandler: (shakes his head) Nothing.
Phoebe: This is bad, bad, VERY BAD!
(Chandler seems stunned.)
Mike: Pain-killers, she seduced.
(Rachel enters with her wedding dress. By the way, they're all not IN the wedding chapel right now. They're just behind the doors.)
Monica: Rachel!
Rachel: Hey, how do I look?
(They all look at her, very saddened and overwhelmed.)
Chandler: (about to cry) You look amazing.
Rachel: (smiling) Thank you. Now what are you all doing here? Why aren't you in THERE? (a pause) Is something wrong? Monica, what's going on?
Monica: Honey, there's nothing…
Rachel: Is…is Ross not in there? (A pause.) Monica?
Monica: Rach, let's go fix your make-up.
Rachel: What, no, Mon it's already fixed. I just fixed it.
Monica: Yeah, but… (She screws with her make-up) Oh no would you look at that? Let's go fix that!
Rachel: No…
(Monica drags Rachel to some other place)
Phoebe: This is sad. This is sad, sad and very sad and that's not just the drugs talking.
Chandler: It's Ross! Y'know? And it's Rachel! How could he…how could he do that? He stood her up. That's terrible.
Phoebe: She's gonna cry and when Rachel cries, I cry. And if I cry, the baby cries! (Beat) See, that's a lot of people Ross's making cry.
Mike: Did he and Rachel get into some kind of fight, or is this still the Joey-thing?
Chandler: I never thought about it like that. Maybe it's the Joey thing.
Ross: What Joey thing?
Chandler: (turns around to typically talk to Ross) Oh, you know, the whole Joey-telling-Rachel-he-loves-her thing. (he turns around again, realizes then back at Ross.) Oh my god!
Phoebe: You came!
Joey: (approaching) Yeah, he did.
Phoebe: (to Ross, about to punch him) You son of a … bastard!
Ross: Did she just…call my father a bastard?
Phoebe: There's a church 2 feet away, Ross, I'm not calling your mother a bitch… Oh! (gasps and covers her mouth)
Chandler: Where the hell have you guys been?
Ross: We…went out for some fresh air.
Mike: Fresh air? Is that it?
Ross: Yes.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, sure.
Chandler: We looked all over the city for you, Monica's freaking out, Phoebe's on drugs, and there's a strange man stripping for your guests in there! (He points at the doors)
Phoebe: Ok, well now go in there before Rachel comes and sees you.
Ross: Ok, just Phoebe…
Phoebe: Gooooo! (She pushes Ross, through the doors, into the chapel) So, Joe, what was really goin' on?
Joey: Fresh air.
Phoebe: Joey.
Joey: He uh he got scared. Probably just cold feet or something, y'know? (There's a pause.) He wanted to leave. He was gonna leave her.
Phoebe: You convinced him to stay.
Joey: Yeah, that's what a best man is for, right?
Phoebe: Right.
Chandler: Ready to go in?
Mike: Let's do it.
(They all enter except for Chandler when he sees Monica and Rachel return)
Chandler: Hey.
Monica: Hey, where'd everyone go?
Chandler: Everybody's waiting. (Monica looks at him.) C'mon, Rach, Ross is waiting for you.
(Monica sighs in relief, understanding what happened.)
Monica: (to Rachel) You ready?
Rachel: Yeah, just give me a minute. (sighs) Oh god this is really happening. Mon, I'm really getting married.
Monica: (smiles) Yeah you are.
Rachel: I can't believe this.
Chandler: You uh…you want me to walk you down the aisle, since your father…?
Rachel: (looks down at first) Right…yeah, sure, thanks Chandler. I would really appreciate that.
Monica: See you in there. (She goes in)
(Rachel takes a deep breath.)
Chandler: Y'ready?
Rachel: (sighs) Yeah.
(Cut to inside the chapel. Ross and Joey are standing near the minister, Monica and Phoebe and Mike are now standing to the other side, waiting. The chapel is full of guests and other people.)
Phoebe: (whispers to Monica) What is taking so long?
Monica: Don't worry, she'll get here.
(There is a long silence. Everyone has their eyes locked on the white doors, anxiously waiting for Rachel in her awesome white dress to come through it)
Ross: (whispers to Joey) What's going on? Why is she late?
Joey: It wouldn't be Rachel if she wasn't late.
(The door is opening, and everyone quickly glares at it to see if it's Rachel)
(But it's not: it's Emma and Ben, as flower-girl and ring-boy, dressed perfectly nice in their dress and suit. Everyone awes.)
(There is another long term of awkward silence. Some people are getting concerned on Rachel's alleged arrival to the wedding. Ross is very tense and Phoebe is worried. Mike tries to console her)
Ross: (whispers to Joey) She's not coming.
Joey: Don't say that.
Ross: I can't do this, I'm walking out.
Joey: Ross…
(Ross starts to pace down the aisle, in the opposite direction of course, heading towards the white doors. Everyone starts watching him now)
Phoebe: This is sad. So sad.
Mike: I know.
(Just as Ross continues to pace down the aisle, Rachel enters from the door. Ross stops and smiles. Chandler is walking Rachel down the aisle.)
Rachel: Ross?
Chandler: Dude…
(Ross returns to Joey and the minister)
Rachel: Was he…gonna…?
(Mr. Green, Rachel's father, enters through the doors behind Rachel & Chandler)
Mr. Green: (to Chandler) I'll be taking it from here, thank you.
(Chandler nods at Mr. Green and goes stands with Monica as Mr. Green walks Rachel down the aisle)
Rachel: Dad, what're you doing here? I thought you weren't coming.
Mr. Green: This is my baby. My baby's getting married. I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Rachel: And the 30 year-old slut?
Mr. Green: (chuckles) She's gone.
Rachel: (smiling) Daddy…
Mr. Green: Just please don't tell me you're gonna leave this one at the altar too.
(Rachel chuckles as Mr. Green hands Rachel to Ross at the end of the aisle)
(Ross nods and smiles and everyone takes their seats again, Mr. Green sitting next to Mrs. Green)
Mr. Green: (to Mrs. Green) Oh, you're here.
Mrs. Green: It's my daughter's wedding. Why wouldn't I be here?
Mr. Green: Hmm… that liposuction went well, didn't it?
Minister: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join Ross and Rachel in holy matrimony. Before we begin, if there's anyone who believes these two shall not be joined together, speak now or stay hold forever.
(There is a silence at the chapel. Ross and Rachel trade looks. Rachel glances at Joey, standing behind Ross as his "best man". There is a moment, as Joey looks back at her and when he realizes she's looking at him he quickly looks down to avoid eye-contact)
Minister: Anyone? Anyone at all?
Ross: Ok, I'm sorry, are you here to marry us, or break us?
(Rachel laughs)
Minister: Ok, then, we shall begin…
(Time Lapse. The wedding is still on…)
Minister: Rachel, you may begin your vows.
Rachel: (clears throat) Okay, umm… I gotta say, Ross, to prepare these vows I had to go through a lot. I mean, it was hard for me to discuss my emotions to you that way. But then I realized, it doesn't have to be. All I have to do is say what I wanted to say. What I've been wanting to say for 10 years. We've been together, then apart, then together, then apart. We have a history together, something that keeps us glued to each other. I mean, sure, you slept with a copy-girl like 8 years ago but… (Beat) We made it through. We always made it through, because we long together. We always belonged together, even when we got drunk and married in Vegas! (Beat, Ross is smiling) We're…we're Ross and Rachel, and I love you so I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Minister: Ross, it's your turn to say your vows but please—try to make it less humoring.
Ross: Rachel… I love you. I know that I love you to death. It's not something I have to think about, or take a moment to pause on. I know that every morning I wake up, I begin to love you more. I cannot imagine one minute without being with you. You complete me, Rach, and you're perfect. And I'm certain in my heart that you're my soul-mate, the "one" for me, my best friend. You're the love of my life and if you let me, I will make you happy for the rest of your life.
(If you noticed, or not, most of the things Ross said in his vows were the things Joey advised him to say…earlier in chapter 14. Moving on…)
Minister: All right, then, shall we do the rings?
(Joey hands him the rings. Ross puts the ring around Rachel's finger then she does the same and they smile to each other)
Minister: So I guess by the power vested in me in the state of New York, I now pronounce you… (nods at Ross) husband... (nods at Rachel) and wife. You may kiss the bride.
(Ross leans over and kisses Rachel while everyone claps and whistles like crazy where I also imagine the audience clapping and screaming happily.)
Minister: Congratulations.
(Ross and Rachel are whispering to each other while the clapping and the screaming goes on while Vulnerable by Secondhand Serenade rolls in the background.)
Lyrics of the song in the background: I was born to tell you I love you. Isn't that a song already (isn't that a song already?). I get a B in originality. And it's true I can't go on without you…
Ross: (smiling to Rachel) I'm gonna kiss you again.
Rachel: (smiling back) Really?
Ross: You bet I am.
(Before he gets to kiss her…)
Rachel: Wait, Monica mentioned something about you being late. What was that about?
Ross: Oh, nothing, I had a fling with that copy girl.
(They share a laugh and Ross kisses her again as the clapping/song continues…)
Lyrics…: Your smile makes me see clear. If you could only see in the mirror what I see…
(Scene: The Reception Hall. The wedding is in full swing. Ross, Rachel, Joey, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe and Mike are sitting on one big round table)
Joey: (stands up, clears throat, glass of wine up) I would like to propose a toast…
Chandler: Oh, Joey, you don't have to do that for me, I could propose my own toast for my myself.
Joey: To Ross and Rachel.
All: Cheers!
(They all cling glasses and drink. Don't worry, Phoebe is only having a Coke lol, 'cause she's pregnant)
Joey: So, we were invited for the wedding. We gonna invited for the divorce?
(They share a chuckle.)
Phoebe: (to Mike only) Hey, umm, you think maybe we can name the baby Frank? In case it's a boy.
Mike: Oh, sure honey. What Frank?
Phoebe: It was, umm, it was my father's name. And my stepbrother's name.
Mike: Wow.
Phoebe: And, if you give me a minute, I could think of two more Franks I know in my life.
Mike: (chuckles) And if it's a girl?
Phoebe: How about…um, Ursula?
Mike: Ursula? Wow, that's a weird name. Where'd you come up with that?
Phoebe: Umm…I just did. (She smiles at him then they kiss)
Monica: (to Chandler only) So…when this party is over, do you think we can go and start our own party…you know, in the bedroom?
Chandler: Hmm…will you be naked?
Monica: Fully.
Chandler: Will you strip for me, 'cause the flower-guy really ruined that for me today.
Monica: (chuckles) I'm sorry, I'm sorry. (They kiss.) Hey. We okay?
Chandler: Yeah, of course. (Chuckles) Why wouldn't we be?
Monica: The whole Richard thing? That over?
Chandler: Yes, it's over.
Monica: Good.
Chandler: Because I spoke with Janice.
Monica: (screaming) YOU DID WHAT?! (Everyone at dinner look at her, she smiles embarrassed) Carry on, carry on…
Ross: (to Joey now) Joey, I just wanna say…thanks for everything, man. I wouldn't have made it here without you. You…made me.
Joey: That's why I'm your best man.
Ross: That's why you're my best man.
Joey: So I'll still be your best man at your next wedding?
Ross: You guys aren't gonna let that go for a while, aren't you?
Joey: Nope. (He has a drink)
Chandler: Look at us. (They all pause.) We're a bunch of married people now.
Joey: Yes we are! Let's drink to that!
(They all burst into laughter and have another sip of their drinks)
Rachel: I'm so glad you guys are all here with us … even though The Plaza wouldn't have sounded so bad either, I'm just saying!
Ross: (laughs) I love you. (He kisses her)
Joey: So…this is a wedding. Someone's gotta be pregnant. Nobody pregnant?
Monica: No, Joe, no-one's pregnant.
Phoebe: Wait, that's not true! I'm pregnant.
Joey: Someone new.
Rachel: Nobody's pregnant, Joe.
Phoebe: What, I'm old news now? Mike, say something!
Mike: You really need to stop taking those pills!
Joey: I'm gonna go get some more drinks.
(Joey gets up and heads over to the drinking-table. He starts pouring wine into his glass while Bobbie approaches him. Bobbie, his agent, remember?)
Bobbie: Hi, Joey.
Joey: Bobbie! Hi, what're you doing here?
Bobbie: You invited me.
Joey: No I didn't.
Bobbie: Well then my name is Jane Green and I'm the bride's second cousin.
Joey: Bobbie…
Bobbie: Yeah?
Joey: You wanna go out sometime?
Bobbie: For sex?
Joey: For coffee! Or dinner, or drinks or something.
Bobbie: Sex sounds good, I'll be naked in your room by 9. (She walks away with her drink)
Joey: Eh well… (He walks away with his drink too)
Closing Credits
(Scene: The Wedding hall. It's the kids' table: Emma, Ben, Jack & Erica are sitting to the table drinking Coke and eating kids' food.)
Emma: (to Erica) Did you know that I saw Ben talking with this girl Chloe from the library the other day?
Erica: (gasps) No!
Ben: Emma! We were on…a break!
Emma: Yeah, whatever.
End
……………………………………………………
The End.
Yay, it's the end… No more updates after this, folks, no more new chapters, no more Ross-Rachel-Joey triangle, no more "Oh my god is she pregnant?! (gasps) It's negative?! He told her he loved her?!" No more! :( How sad hehehe (This was a looooooong chapter, wasn't it? I wanted to break it into maybe 2 chaps. or 3 but I already promised Chapter 16 is the last so…)
I hope you liked the story in general, the end and the last chapter in particular. HOPEFULLY YOU WERE ENTERTAINED. Perhaps if I spent more time on the last chapter I would've made it better but hopefully it was good enough for you to review me. also, sorry J/R fans, maybe u were a lil disappointed but from the beginning this seemed like a RnR happy ending.
THANK U SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR UR COMMENTS & FOR READING THIS FANFIC. I hope you will read more from me, and wish me luck for school! UGH! School, hehehe byee. (luv ya cathy)
--Peace & Love. (Take Care)