A/N- ahh right I still have this story;) I think that for the rest of this story i'm bascially going to follow the story line, but some dialogue might be different. review if you do/don't like it. (that beginning is a flashback in case you get confused)

I laid perfectly still on the grass letting the warmth of the sun invade my body and flow through my dormant veins. It came to me, just like that. I started singing, it was the words to Bella's lullaby. They were octaves higher then human ears could hear and in french. I always thought that the french's language was much more beautiful then English or Spanish. The words flowed my mind and out of my mouth without so much as a thought on my part. That's how composing worked for me. I didn't think about it, if I did it would come out horribly. No my music came through inspiration just like that. Just like this.

Bella wondered what I was doing as my lips formed the words she couldn't hear. I told her I was singing to myself, though truly I was singing to her. I didn't want to feel restricted just because she couldn't hear it.

I listened in contentment to the sound of her heart beating. It was picking up and dropping just like the melody sending more words spiraling at me. Something even warmer then the sun brushed the back of my hand. It felt truly amazing. I opened my eyes as Bella looked up. Her eyes were sparkling giving the beautiful brown depths a welcoming glow. A smile touched my lips without any effort.

"I don't scare you?" I teased, though I was honestly curious to know what she was thinking as she starred so intently at my sparkling appearance.

"No more than usual."

Her reply sent an even wider smile to my lips, my teeth caught the sun.

I heard her scoot a little closer to me. The warmth of her fingertips traced along my forearm down along my arm to my finger tips. Her finger trembled, but I didn't bother asking why.

"Do you mind?" she whispered.

"No," I replied not opening my eyes in fear that when I did she'd disappear. "You can't imagine how that feels." I sighed in pleasure.

It had seemed so easy in the beginning. That first day in her meadow I had never felt more human in my life with all of the emotions that were coursing through me. I had tricked myself into believing that the relationship between me and Bella would have been effortless, that it would work out in the end. It truly did feel that way as I had laid out in the sun with her calmly tracing over my arm. I shivered. I missed her warmth. I missed her heartbeat.

I couldn't remember the words of her lullaby now. If I could I'd surely be singing them right now, as I prepared myself to step out into the sun for a final time. It reminded me so much of the day in the meadow which must be why it kept replaying itself in my head in a continuous pattern. I had stood in the safe shadows of the trees thinking over the reasons why I was about to do this. Why I should step into the sun and why I shouldn't. It was the same now. All the reasons why I should related to Bella, all the reasons why I shouldn't related to my family.

The day in the meadow it had been so to make Bella happy, to show her why I was to be feared, to see if she really did love me. I shouldn't have because it would give away my family's secret, risk our existence and bring Bella one more step closer to them. Today, though, was to make me happy by being with Bella, to find her in a place where she really did love and not have to fear anything anymore. I shouldn't be stepping into the sun now because I knew this would hurt my family. Carlisle would blame himself for ever changing me and making me go through this. Esme would mourn over the lost of yet another son. Alice would be alone with Jasper to deal with being different though, in a way, Jasper had never fully understood Alice. Emmett would miss me, Rosalie, despite it all, would too. But those two would survive, I didn't have to fear for them. I just hoped that when I stepped into the sun they wouldn't be here trying to stop me or the stop the Volturi from killing me for both would result in the death of them. I was going to leave this earth without them.

The monster inside of me was mute now. It had realized that there was nothing more it could do to me, now that I was giving up. It was getting ready to leave, to go find someone else to torture as it had done to me. I doubted anyone could make it as long as I have, I think that was impossible. I stepped up to the very edge of the shadows as the clock showed one minute until noon. I stood, still as a statue, waiting to hear the clock chime.

Bong! It went off for the first time and I smiled. The wind blew strongly in my face. I was so close to death that I could smell her. I lifted my foot as I prepared to step into the sun. The clock chimed a fifth time and I dramatically began lowering my foot.

No longer would I be held captive on this rathole known as earth. I would soon be free.