A/N: Sorry for the author note to chapter ratio, but this has to be said. Though no one yet has attacked my fic, it will probably happen eventually due to the nature of it, that being that it is a ZADR. This is stated in the summary, so if anyone reads it and flames me because it's a ZADR they should die. Because it clearly says before you read it that it is a ZADR. Here, I'll make it easier:
ZIM: Well Jesus, Paroxsymal, I rather hate ZADR and all of its ugly forms.
PARA: Well you see Zim, it clearly states in the fiction's summary that the story is a ZADR, so if the very mention of its name makes you want to vomit until your eyes bleed, I would suggest just not reading it at all.
ZIM: That's a pretty damn good idea. thnx0rz.
See how easy that is? And if you don't like ZADR because you're a homophobe, then be more tolerant, okay? You're not perfect either so you have no right to say what people should do. You only have the right to shut the hell up. Besides, this is fanfiction. We get to play with the characters as we like, whether or not you say it makes Jhonen want to cry. If Victor Hugo were alive, he'd probably want to cry over Javert/Valjean. But no one has a problem with that, now do they? The way I see it, ZADR is similar to Javert/Valjean, in that it's not so much about the gayness as it is how closely related love and hate are, a connection between enemies. Sure, Les Mis is much more deep than Invader Zim, but it's the principle of the thing. That's why I like ZADR. You can disagree with me, but do it in an intelligent way. If your review is similar to "ong ur fik iz so dum i h8 it u suk", I will kill you or flame the shit out of you. You will cry. Anyway...IZ belongs to Johnen Vasquez. Sorry for the short chapter...
"I'm sure you already know of my greatness and awesomeness, and that the Irken armada is poised to bring this filthy planet to its knees before the mighty Irken empire, where it belongs. And you know what? I'll be worshipped for it! Yes, worshipped, I, Zim, by far the best invader! The Tallest were wise to choose me for such a mission...They will not be disappointed, I promise you. The destruction of Earth will be sweet, yes it will..." Zim cackled and wrung his hands, crimson eyes flicking side to side, sharp teeth curved into a wicked grin. However, he realized his audience was not too fond of listening to the eminent doom that was to befall his home. So Zim straightened up and resumed his speech. "But you don't care about that; you already know about that. I must tell you something secretive."
"Sure, but...how do you plan on bringing the Earth to its demise, huh?" Dib inquired, poised to take in every detail Zim spilled about his conquest. He was soon struck down with the alien's refusal to continue with the subject; the sensation was like being pulverized by a cement truck. Right before his eyes, Dib's brilliant plan was crumbling. It took all of his strength to restrain himself from diving at Zim and shaking the information out of his annoying little head. Besides, Zim had already moved on to his secret. Not that Dib cared, his hopes now shattered like a cliff diver against a reef.
"Now then...In my time on this hideous planet, I've found that humans are perhaps some of the stupidest creatures to curse this already disgusting place. Not a single one has caught wind of my plans or even questioned my brilliant guise. No one, none except you. You were the first to discover me, and so we became nemesises. And yet even as enemies, you are still the only human I have relations with, hateful or otherwise. But you are not like the others, Dib. No, you are far more clever, determined to show it even if it makes you the center of all ridicule, which you rightly deserve, but nonetheless. I believed this to be a simple mission, easily done and comepleted with my greatness. But no. You have been my only obstacle this entire time. And as much as I hate to admit it...I enjoy the challenge. Yes, you have given Zim a great task, stupid human. Otherwise I would have easily cinched this planet. You are a loyal warrior to your little Earth, Dib-stink, perhaps greater than some Irkens I have encountered. Except for me, of course. You and I, we are the prime of our kind, yet so misunderstood. It is both astounding and sickening to see how much we are alike. And so my secret is that...I find you to be a worthy adversary. Yes, stand in awe, as the great Zim admits you to be the only opponent to have stood up to him."
Although listening to Zim's narrative was exhausting, Dib certainly did not miss the final shred of admiration. The boy let his jaw hang loose, desperately trying to contemplate what had just happened, merging every emotion and thought into a very strangled "What?"
"You. are. a. worthy. ad-ver-sa-ry." Each word and letter was drug out painfully slow by Zim, who added, "Did you get even stupider, Dib-human?"
"N-no, I just...wasn't expecting..." As much as he denied it, in the past few moments Dib had become much less eloquent in his speech. Gulping down a few breaths, Dib tried again. "You think I'm a 'worthy adversary'?"
"Surprising, isn't it? But I suppose that's why it's a secret. And if Dib is true to his word, none of the other wormbabies can hear about this," Zim threatened, pointing an accusing claw at Dib's face. In his dazed state, Dib responded with some form of agreement, still trying to get over the fact that Zim had complimented him and that he had again been foiled in his grand scheme to reveal the alien. A sudden relevation overcame Dib, a wave of realization washing over him and setting his voice in automatic.
"I...I have another secret to tell you..."