(Disclaimer- I own a pretty little man-bella, i do.)
honestly, i can't even tell if this is funny. its funny in my head... because i can see it happen.
but like i've said, if there is any scenario you'd like me to write about for one of the chapters, TELL ME!
and thanks to queenoftheviciousvines, who helped me with this entire idea during study hall last year. :D
she deserves to be recognized. read and review!
oh, and this is really short, but remember...this isn't like a normal story. its not supposed
to be solid and magnificent. just strange and amusing. :) bye now.
Stalked
Isaac walked quicker now through the grocery store, a bucket of food supplies in his left hand. He'd managed to escape the two strange men for almost two days now, which was a pleasant surprise after being stalked for a whole week. Everywhere he turned it seemed there they were: a strange and freakishly tall Indian man and a pale…well, sort of a hunk, really. Not that Isaac was into men. He wasn't. Nope.
He was nearing the register now, his eyes locked on a pretty blonde girl. Now this was more his taste. She was about five feet and six inches tall, blue-eyed and smiling. Her lips were full and pink and her figure was slim but lovely. All he'd have to do was come up with some catchy conversation to get her to notice him. Maybe he'd go the "badass" route today. Play around with the idea of that motorcycle he'd seen in the parking lot being his. She wouldn't know if he was lying to her.
In line now, he grinned at her, glancing down at the nametag on her shirt. Michelle, He thought. It was a bearable name, he supposed. And if he were to get sick of it, he could always just call her something else, tell her that it was just a nickname, that he wanted something special to call her. Again, she wouldn't know if he was lying to her. She wouldn't know that he just hated her name.
"Hello, Michelle." He said conversationally, taking his place before her.
"Hi there, how are you this morning?" She gave him a big grin, causing his eyebrow to rise in a particularly cocky gesture. He had always been pretty confident with the ladies—overly confident, maybe, always making a show of how well he could flirt with them. Back home in Texas that meant something different to the kids. It meant that he had something to hide, that he was using his flirting skills as a cover up. But he wasn't into guys!
"Better now," He smiled, flashing his teeth. "Ever been on a Harley?"
She blinked, glancing out the door. Apparently she'd been admiring the bike, too. "No. Why, is that thing yours?"
His grin grew large. "Why, yes. Yes, it is."
"You know that's parked illegally, right?"
His grin faltered. He coughed. "Well, that's what we bad-boys do, don't you think?" When the smile came back to his lips, both he and Michelle could tell it was a nervous one. She snorted, raising her brows.
"You're not the best at flirting, are you?"
His jaw dropped. "I'd like to think I'm pretty good, actually. One of the best."
She chuckled at his disgruntled expression, dropping a bag into his little hand-held basket. What kind of a man used a little pink basket like that? A pansy, most likely. She snickered behind her hand. "Right."
Aggravated, he gritted his teeth, on the verge of just giving up. She wasn't that pretty. He huffed. "What's your last name, doll?" He tried one last time.
"Newton. Michelle Newton."
He made a face, for some reason no longer as interested as he was a moment before. His stomach felt a little weak all of a sudden like he might puke. "Do I know you from somewhere?"
"No. I'm pretty sure I would have remembered you." She chuckled arrogantly.
Scowling, he ripped the remaining bag from the counter—replacing it with some cash—chucked it into his basket and turned on his heels. What an unpleasant girl she was! Nobody ever turned Isaac Swatskee down.
As Isaac came closer to the exit, he froze, blinking rapidly. He could not be seeing what he thought he was. That would be impossible, wouldn't it?
At the very top of the glass door there was a face, just a face, hanging upside down, peering at him. The golden eyes watched him with adoration, eyebrows pressed together and up, mouth popped open in a way that made him look as though he were cooing.
The pale hunk.
With an infuriated bellow, Isaac charged for the door, hoping that when it opened the strange white man would fall flat on his face. Instead, the man clung there, somehow sticking there like a spider. Only his head turned to watch Isaac dash over to his car, his expression anguished.
"No!" The strange man called to Isaac as he ran.
Edward jumped down from his spot above the door, running hopelessly forward in an attempt to stop his one true love. As he dodged an oncoming car, he saw Jacob pop out of a dumpster, covered in dirt.
"No, Bella, wait!" Jacob called, trying feebly to climb out of the large green bin.
Both were too late though, sadly watching as Isaac tore his way out of the parking lot and screeched out onto the street. Edward sniffled.
"Nice going, Spidey." Jacob huffed, throwing a displeased look over the banana peel perched on his shoulder at Edward. Edward's chin dropped low to his chest, the attitude of a teenage girl displayed on his face. He clicked his tongue, rolling his neck back.
Jacob almost thought he would snap his fingers to finish off the move, but he didn't.
"Oh pull-eaze. And I suppose you're going to tell me that your dumpster-diving expertise was a real turn-on for her, hm?" He snorted. "You're such a canine."
And Jacob punched him in the arm.