Mind Gardens,
fauxPROJECT
"The torment of human frustration, whatever its immediate cause, is the knowledge that the self is in prison, its vital force and 'mangled mind' leaking away in lonely, wasteful self-conflict." - Elizabeth Drew
Chapter Two, keep in mind.
Neji is a troubled man—child. He is troubled with just about everything, but it's expertly hidden with a lock and key. He supposes that this fallacy is something everyone has gained over the years. It's a pretty plain concept, because shinobi are still human and humans are predictable. Others may just be a bit more lethal.
Like Neji is with fire lighting his feet to move a little quicker through the marble, white-bleach hospital halls. The black spandex-material of his ANBU uniform grips at his tense muscles, but it keeps him calm at the same time. But he fears that it only may be for a limited amount of time. Because it's like a time bomb and one day it'll bust.
For the stench of a hospital is one that peeves him to no end. The click of the heels of the nurses and the chatter between them—
"I can't see her like that Shikamaru,"
Neji halts for a moment, and eyes focus on the stacked shinobi. Time is slowing and spinning into horizontal directions instead of moving forward as he stares at the two.
Shikamaru bites his tongue for a moment; he waits to speak until his back is turned, "Visit. You haven't been here for about a month." Which is surprising to Neji that someone such as the Nara is bothered by this—he's insufferably lazy himself.
"I can't Shikamaru," His face becomes flushed with the weight of his body combined with true embarrassment, and Neji can even see sweat drip from his brow. With a growl comes, "—Chouji.." And Neji feels his legs become numb and he is almost floating as he finds himself inching closer to the duo as Shikamaru turns the knob as Chouji turns away slightly.
"Neji?" The door has stopped opening and Neji's jaw tightens but he relaxes it and says, "Hm." Chouji has lost his identity within reality as he stares off and Shikamaru just gazes unfavorably at him. "Well—open it." Neji merely suggests, reaching for the door and nudging it open.
Ivory white sheets are askew and with that quick glimpse the heavy stomps of Shikamaru's clothed sandals echo against wallpaper and his form disappears in a hurry. But Chouji remains and just peers into the lit room with a certain woman—child absent. Neji isn't taken off guard when he doesn't say a word. Chouji instead just waddles in the opposite direction and Neji realizes that the Akamichi probably won't ever step foot in that hospital again, no matter how Shikamaru pesters him.
Time becomes stable and Neji, oddly complacent for the moment—or his short term memory has finally failed, heads for the exit.
Because perhaps Chouji is troubled too.
Just perhaps, just perhaps.
-
"You are being suspended from duty. No release date has been set. Failure to complete missions, medical input, and the most recent mission as well....."
—She balls her fist until her nails make her palms bleed. Because the color of red is more alive than the dim light of sky blue.
But she is Ino Yamanaka, she will bleed rivers before she ever cries baby blue. But the back of her eyelids burn with Tenten's dead, decayed face staring back at her.
Stubborn as ever, she will just continue to look away.
-
....CLOSING.
That word leaves such an odd ring in her ears that it's mind boggling.
It leaves a tart taste in her mouth but she is not sad. Neither is she angry or upset. It's a state of mind that floats between numb and the fall that her gut makes, and it's one that comes around often. Although never one she gets used to. Especially after she sets the last basket on the outside of the shop, and doesn't hesitant to indefinitely lock the doors to it (well at least according to her set agenda.) for eternity.
"—Oh my, how beautiful—Miss? Are these flowers for free?"
A flash of a smile and Ino replies easily, "Of coarse. The shop's closing, and—" She feels as if she's rambling, "Yes. Free." She sighs with a slight scratch to the top of her head before turning away.
"Free?" A small voice pipes up and it makes Ino grin.
"Hinata!" She says with a small laugh and smile, but she feels her lips quiver for a moment as she notices the bandages wrapped around her forehead. "Are you alright?" She questions moving forward slightly. Of coarse, Hinata shies back, hands on her head.
"Just a bump."
"Oh."
Hanabi is staring blankly at Ino while Hinata stares off-handedly at the flowers. The sound of other people chatting filling the space. Hinata suddenly crouches down to some yellow flowers, and Ino doesn't even bother noticing what kind of a flower before she places a hand on her shoulder and rubs it a bit.
"Naruto will be back sooner than you think." She begins, smiling to the sun, "We all miss him, Hinata." She just responds with a nod, before peering up at Ino then to Hanabi then back once more.
"I-Ino..what..what happened on your mission?" Ino sees her eyes teary, and feels a bit off for mentioning Naruto, but is taken back by her dodging the subject and turning the tables on her.
"Which one?" Ino starts, a bit defensive.
"Neji hasn't been back, and before he left he was urgent on returning before a c-certain family meeting." She starts to stumbling and stutter, "But he went right i-in and straight back out to find you."
"Have whatever flower basket you and Hanabi want." Ino comments before heading for the door to her house and slams it. Her blood is pumping hard and her brain feels like it's swelling against her cranium. She waits for the rush to pass before opening her eyes. Dark spots float in front of her eyes as she regains her balance. As if blinded, she reaches for the wall as if to sustain herself as she slinks her way through the hallway and towards the dining room.
Her heart rate is still accelerating—Ino just can't seem to pipe it down. Even as she stops at the door way, staring at her father.
He's staring up at the ceiling with a vacuous look swept across his eyes and face. His hands are folded almost too perfectly; they're pale and the veins can be easily seen through the clear sheen of his skin. He doesn't move.
Silence.....
"Otousan," She breathes.
It's all she can do before collapsing to her knees while grabbing her head; threading her fingers through her pale-blonde hair tightly.
"Come back," She shivers. She repeats this over and over, like a child weeping for mercy.
Yet, Otousan does not move.
-
"We have to scout for her—"
"But we have to move forward, there's simply no option!"
Suddenly, Neji feels his chest tighten as he stares at the fire that's ignited the trees before him. For some reason, he feels as if Tenten did—like death hung on a left or right decision. He takes a gasp of air to get rid of the sickening feeling of drowning in his own thoughts. His eyes sting with a temptation to do what Tenten did wrong—to continue.
The heat burns wildly against his powder-white cheeks and sends prickles and shivers through out his body.
"We need to find Yamanaka."
Because Neji's team captain, and now a fool.
Maybe forever a fool.
-
She's hunched against the wall, silently crying.
Neji lets out a mangled sigh, releasing the bandages he had snatched off of Hinata's forehead. He is trembling, he realizes. He actually has to drop the bandages before his fingers fall off. He resists the urge to place his hands over his face—because for once Neji is shameful.
"Hinata-sama—" He begins, an almost fearful step forward, "I—Forgi—" His lips feel heavy and swollen almost.
New blood trickles from the stale wound on her temple.
Something changes in her eyes as she speaks, "Neji-nii-san, I told you nothing would happen while you were gone."
But faintly in Neji's head all he can see is the hallucination of the branch family curse lingering on her forehead. Even when she has taken her silent leave, Neji just stands.
Swastikas are all he can see for now.
-
"Oh, Kakashi—" Ino's a bit startled, it's been awhile since he's been in Sakura's room.
Stiff and laden, he raises a hand for acknowledgement of her. His grey-silver hair is a little more flat than usual—his eye more heavy and dark.
"The nurses have said she's doing pretty well," Lies. "She's stable and all." Ino can't seem to fathom why she lies. "I'm positive." Rambling.
He just nods in politeness; Ino is sure of it. The atmosphere is not so much crucial as it is uncomfortable. The whirl of machines and the sound of Sakura's monitored breathing is all that is making Ino—maybe Kakashi—sane with each other just for the moment. The air is cold. So cold that it makes her own lungs hurt and tighten. Her mouth is dry and she is speechless.
"I've been doing my own research on her." She starts out, brighter than usual. "I've examined the chakra veins interconnecting within her brain." She's so pessimistically optimistic when Kakashi visits. "I think I can fix her if I can try."
"She doesn't need to be fixed." He snaps.
"Yes, she does."
"You're not a nurse, Ino. You flunked out of that area. Let the med-nins do their job." It's more of a sensei talking now, but with a bit of restraint. Suddenly, a chair is flung and flowers are thrown everywhere. She rips them apart; but she is not crying. She is just blinded as she curses and yells with a fury.
"She's broken—just like the rest of us. Just like you, just like Sasuke, Chouji." She spits, "Just like my father!"
Hinata is someone too shy to peer through the crack of the door of Sakura's room. The commotion is causing stares in the hallway—but Neji is not too polite not to stare through the crack of the door.
"Just like me." She seethes, white-blonde hair standing pointedly in all different directions. Suddenly, she's flushed and wants to escape. She tries to squeeze through the crack of the door, but Neji won't move. Her mind is even more jumbled and she's daunted by his very presence.
"Move!" She hollers in his face. Courage nor fear is present. She's an animal.
Neji's lavender stare just passes right through her and he refuses to move. She shoves him a bit as a warning.
"I said move, Neji."
"I won't." Neji doesn't really know just why he won't move. But he can't bear to take his eyes off of her. For someone just so wild a moment ago, she finds herself melting in front of him. Her blue eyes are watery and her lips quiver. She beats her feminine fists weakly against his chest as she sobs. For someone who takes pride in her exhibition, she sure doesn't cry pretty. But Neji has to give her credit—she's so raw. He roughly grabs her tense shoulders and gruffly whispers, "Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital yourself?—since you're so broken." Hurting never felt so exhilarating.
She jabs him in a sweet spot in his chest that he has to step back for a moment. She finds herself a way out—uncharacteristically she flees.
Something akin to anger, redemption, and sweet, sweet victory rolls in his stomach and curls into a smile.
-
And Neji will never admit his flaws—he'll never be broken like he was long ago.
Never, ever, again.
-
"Neji, as you being team captain you are about to be subjected to confidential information. Your mission with Ino is something different," Tsunade begins. "Ino has a second objective.."
Suddenly Neji knows, but does not understand.
-
"Flowers for Tenten." Shikamaru frowns at Neji, who is grinning only slightly. Shikamaru shakes his head as he shuts the door close to Sakura's room, with Kakashi still inside. "You should drop some off some flowers for Tenten." He repeats, his own dark eyes spent. His tone is very condescending yet not scolding—they are not children correcting the other's behavior.
Suddenly Neji fails to grin; he has yet to drop some off.
Suddenly Neji realizes, but still does not fathom.