Last and Alone – Secret
Title: Part 9
Rating: T
Characters: Jazz, the Monolith Team, Totality Team
Warnings: Mech x Mech hinted at/mentioned occasionally

Universe: G1-ish/Last and Alone/Monolith
Disclaimer: I, in no way, shape, or form, own the Transformers© franchise or the characters it contains. They belong to Has/Tak, No infringement intended. Any OC's to my knowledge are solely mine.
Summary: Perceptor was once part of a gestalt, but the others were destroyed. Since he should never have survived the deaths of his teammates, it's a secret he has kept for thousands of vorns. Now Jazz is tracking it down.

You're gonna love this ending okami-chan XD (but the next chapter should be up quick.)

Part 9

Jazz freed himself from the memory and paused. The memory of that first merge had actually carried feelings. Not just thoughts and emotions, but feelings as well. Feeling was actually an inadequate description, but he could think of nothing better at the moment. Nothing he had ever done within any hub had ever offered what he had just felt. Feelings were not part of any information transfers within a hub unless you were an actual communications bot designed for communicating to the hub itself like Blaster or Soundwave or they're Cassettes. Nor was it anything like his bond with Prowl, though feeling was most certainly part of that. It had been amazing and unnerving at the same time. Perhaps even dangerous? It certainly had not caused the panic level of earlier when he had shattered the firewalls, but what he had felt was… He wasn't sure, but one of the voices had said seductive. Yes that might be the word. And if it was seductive, it was dangerous. Yes, that was it, what he had felt had been amazingly good, but dangerous. He had felt everything in that memory. He'd wanted to stay, just as those others had.

Jazz shook himself and moved on, though with more caution.

/\/\/\

"You're a thief?" was the question directed at Perceptor by Cavalier.

The team was finally back in the lounge area of their own quarters having completed running the gauntlet of tests and scans that the medical and science teams had put them through. It was the first time they had been alone since the merge a little over a joor ago. And it had been clear through the now greatly increased strength of the bonds that they would talk when alone. Not in front of the labbies. Thus each had had plenty of time to mull over all they had seen in each other's sparks and processors as their memories, and really their entire selves had spilled into each other. For better or for worse, there were no secrets between them anymore. Sorting out whose memories were who's though was not nearly as clear cut as one would think. And some of the revelations were, well, surprising to other members of the team.

Slider moved over a little in Perceptor's direction; for while Cavalier's tone was carefully neutral, the tone coming loud and clear through the fresh, raw bonds from Cavalier was disgust. And if he could feel it, then Perceptor could as well.

"No, I am not a thief. Yes I was created to be a thief and for a good many vorns I did do work in that discipline. But now, I'm a member of your team just as Slider, Gazer, Foist and Tonic are. My background was of no importance before we merged. It shouldn't be an issue now. Primus! A joor ago you saw everything that I am and what do you get hung up on? My first profession? The one I was working very hard to leave behind before the CCC stepped in and changed my path in life? You don't see the others picking out the moments we're all least proud of and bringing them out in the open? I never applied to the martial academy, but I clearly remember being accepted and how elated I was that I got in. I. Remember. The. Feeling! If I have the feelings to your memories, then you have mine. What we all have between us is so much more than a permanent uplink between six bots. No one but us is ever going to truly understand what connects us. So, you want to question me that's fine, but don't set your vocalizer to neutral when we can all feel what you really mean through the slagging bonds. And you know what, you're stuck with all of us whether you like it or not."

Cavalier bristled and everyone felt him struggle through the bonds to calm himself even as Tonic sent calming feelings into the same bonds.

"Slag Cep, you just had to finish that spiffy speech with an antagonistic ending didn't you?" Slider dimmed his optics quickly in exasperation as he deliberately turned his back on Cavalier to grab Perceptor's shoulders and with a tolerant yet frustrated frown, look him in the optics.

Perceptor averted his gaze, as his anger and frustration slid from the bonds while embarrassment and regret took its place. "Sorry" he mumbled.

"Hey, don't tell me, tell him. Then maybe we can all sit down and sort some of this out. Huh?"

Perceptor joined Slider in a glance around the room, no one had taken a seat yet and Gazer, Foist and Tonic were looking decidedly unhappy with the turn of events. Perceptor then looked over to Cavalier where he still stood alone glaring. "Sorry Cav, the last was uncalled for I guess."

A moment of stubbornness before resignation and acceptance flowed through the bonds, "I'm sorry to. Your right, I saw everything and should be able to understand yet I got hung up on the thief part."

Slider smiled as he stepped aside and spun to face the room "Great! Now that that's settled, which one of you removed the door to the Academy Presidents office and replaced it with a perfectly matched wall section complete with the correct paint?

"That would be me." Foist raised his hand sheepishly

/\/\/\

Jazz moved on skimming along the memories, dipping in and out, slowing, speeding, pausing as items caught his interest. He paused as he felt Perceptor shiver and a faint brief attack against his intrusion. A quick counter attack, then he was back to work.

The files became more routine as time passed and the team learned more about their bonds and how Monolith worked. They became a smooth operating team. They launched into space to patrol Cybertron's distant colony planets and explore planets for future colonies and mines. Offering aid when needed and chasing from trade routes freelancing pirates. Long periods spent away from Cybertron with only each other and brief visits on colony worlds.

/\/\/\

Kneeling by Perceptor Tonic yanked his medical field kit from sub-space as he ran scans over the scouts chassis . "Slag it all, his primary coolant pump and energon pump are scrap and the secondary ones are failing. His temps are rising, his spark is fluctuating, not to mention numerous leaks of all sizes in both his energon and coolant lines plus some other structural damage." Tonic looked at Foist, working hard to fight through the panic and fear that was beginning to permeate the bonds as the entire team felt Perceptor's spark start to fluctuate and get weaker. It was scary and painful in a way he had never felt.

"Tonic! Come on buddy, pull it together, get some shielding up. You aren't going to solve this by panicking." Foist's voice was strained when he spoke, himself obviously fighting the fear and panic of the bonds.

The team could feel Perceptor's entire presence within the bonds fading each time his spark dimmed. It was the first time any of them had been damaged so badly that permanent deactivation was a likely possibility and it was rattling them to say the least.

Not a good thing when Tonic knew the rest of the team was still pursuing the last of the pirates through this moons cave system. As distracted as the team currently was, they were much more likely to become targets themselves. And if another one of them took any serious damage, based on the near numbing processor feelings they were all currently experiencing, it would probably be enough to make them all useless by distress. That situation in all likelihood would end with the pirates gaining the upper hand and terminating them all.

Primus, he had to pull it together and fix this. "Gazer, medical emergency red ball one, I need you now!"

"On my way."

Tonic was relieved Gazer had not hesitated, nor Cav or Slider questioned. He had never used the red ball one code before, which effectively told the entire team that the order or request or both that Tonic had just given was so important in priority that it took precedence over anything else. Remaining team members not responding directly to the code would have to compensate for however the code may have affected them.

"Tonic, what's the plan?"

"I don't have the parts needed to save Cep and the Seeker is too far away to get them here or Cep there in time, so I'm going to take the needed parts from Gazer. He's a modified battle model like Cep, so he has redundant secondary systems to aid in the prevention of quick bleedout."

"Why not Cav? As a created battle model he's got redundant upon redundant parts and systems."

Tonic stared at Foist, then reached out and slapped the others helm and glared. "Now who needs to Focus? I know it's tough, but you have got to try to function here! Between Cav and Gazer, who's the warrior better qualified to continue pursuit?"

Foist failed to answer the question, choosing to state the more urgent. "Tonic, I can feel us losing him."

"I know." Tonic shook his head and turned to Perceptor removing what was left of his chest armor.

"Gazer, ETA?"

"Four kliks, half a breem, probably less."

"Less would be better."

"Copy that."

Tonic got the armor off and dug in clamping off more lines and readjusting clamps already placed. Gazer appeared with perfect timing just as Tonic was ready for him.

"Gazer you're donating some parts, get your aft on the other side of me, lay down here," and he pointed to the spot that would keep him between the two warriors while he worked. "Foist get his chest plate off, now!"

As Gazer moved to comply with the order Tonic turned back to Perceptor, looking everything over again. :Come on Cep, your stronger than this:

Turning to Gazer lying on the ground, he explained what he was going to do as he began the actual process. "I'm going to use your secondary pumps and place them in Cep in hopes that it they do the job for his slagged chassis. You need to lay here and not move, because I am only clamping off your lines before I cut them, once Foist and I get Cep set with your pumps, Foist will seal your lines so you can move. Do you understand? If you jar the clamps, you yourself might bleed out. So stay put."

Then gratefully Tonics world condensed to only what he was doing, the panic, fear, pain and despair of the team and the bonds shielded and shoved to the background and time was lost to him as he clamped then cut the lines to Gazer's secondary coolant pump, lifting it out as collant spilled over his hands and into Gazer's chassis. Ignoring the spillage he immediately spun around to Perceptor, setting the pump right next to the faulty one he cut the now failed pump out and placed the good one in dimly aware that Foist was doing the exact same with the energon pump. His movements were quick, neat and efficient. When he was done he took over from Foist the energon pump then moved to other leaks he saw in coolant and energon lines and began patching those. Satisfied with the field patches he brought himself back to the broader world around him at the same time releasing his sheilding and found the team mind concerned, but no longer at the dangerous panicky level of before. He did not need to scan Perceptor to learn the condition of his spark, he could feel that it was again stable and strong within the bonds. "Well Cep, I sure hope this is good enough work to keep you till we get you to the Seeker."

/\/\/\

Jazz shook himself mentally, sure he would not get use to that part of the uplink where the memories weren't Perceptor's, yet were. And this time he knew this oddity was because of the gestalt. After the team had merged for the first time, he found many of Perceptor's memories linked in a way that was in fact difficult to even describe. In some cases a scene could be unfolding and he would be seeing it from multiple perspectives all at the same time. And plenty of times, he found himself in a memory that Perceptor had not even been present for, yet ran conjointly with what Perceptor had been doing at the exact same time. Yet it was very much integrated with Perceptor's own memory of the event.

The realization came that even though he was not in Perceptor's memory specifically; said memory was still Perceptor's own. There was no indication that it was merely a shared or transferred file. It was actually Perceptor's and yet not. And along with it was the knowledge that everything he saw and felt in the strange mechs memory was just as true and honest as if he were still in Perceptor's. Then he'd remember that this was Perceptor. That this was still Perceptor's memory. Or was it? That his first direct uplink experience was with a member of a gestalt was probably not helping.

Vorns passed and it was all very routine with an occasional piece of excitement thrown in for good measure. Jazz marveled at the kaleidoscope that had been Perceptor's life. Planets, moons, asteroid belts, stars comets, a nebula, a black hole. Planets and moons of grey, red, blue, yellow, brown, wet, dry, a combination of the above. Some with life, some without, some just developing, some just dying, some hostile to Cybertronian life, some friendly. The team has seen much, done much and met many mechs in their travels amongst the colonies. Eventually they were freed from the Controller and carried out missions on their own. Over the vorns, the team came to believe in the colonies. Far flung outposts that in many cases took several meta-cycles travel to reach.

They met the six mechs destined to become the second gestalt while on an infrequent visit home. Nearly a meta-cycle later, while in a distant system watching a comet destroy a developing organic world the team received word that the second gestalt had successfully merged with Totality the resulting name. Over the nearly five thousand vorns that followed the teams worked together occasionally and played and relaxed together during the rare times their paths and schedules crossed. Then they were all called back to Cybertron. A third gestalt was ready to be brought on line.

Thank you to everyone for the great reviews. They are appreciated.