Wilson stared at House, a trivial smile on the very corner of his mouth.
"Oh, wow, now, really?" The sarcasm was obvious in his voice, and he was twisteing a paper clip around his fingers.
House seemed displeased by Wilson's reaction. He was not taking him seriously. That, or he knew.
He can't know, House told himself. Cuddy just found out herself.
"What?" he barely managed to ask.
"I already knew it," he smiled plainly.
"And I don't believe you," House said as he planted his rear beside a cancer patient's newest lab results. "Looks like your newest girlfriend is about to die. That must suck."
"She's 13. She has a very advanced lymphoma and she just found out. Her dad died last week in a car accident, and now I haveto brake it to her mom that she will be very alone in just a few months."
"Who, Cuddy? That's funny she didn't have anything three sweet weeks ago. Lymphoma or clothes." House's face looked pleased, macho.
"You slept with Cuddy?" Wlson's face grew wide-eyed and enraged. And his body quivered in the slightest way.
"Of course! Got her knocked up too!" He smiled at Wilson and laughed at his pain. "Jealous?"
"Cuddy came to me, right after she got that test! She's… pretty sure I'm the father. Jealous?"
"You are not the goddamned father! I had sex with her! I told her to take that damned test, and she just told me it's positive! I knocked her up!" To his own surprise, House's rage was growing. He did not believe he wanted a child, but what about now? He felt strangely jealous and possessive of this child that might not even be his… but Wilson's!
"Well, obviously, if she hadn't thought it was my child, why would she have come to me first?" He stood from his chair to face House, who was still sitting next to the cancer girl's lab.
"Because you have a father face. But I'm sure this child is mine. The most fertile day of her cycle, her hormones were on a high. And she was unbelievable!" House stood up and faced Wilson, the pleasure of the flashback showing in his voice.
"Right. You're a bastard. Even if you were the father, you'd only screw up Cuddy's child on the inside. And she realizes this. She doesn't want you!" Wilson's declaration climaxed with this statement. "And by the way, that wasn't my first time with Cuddy. But she was exceptionally good that day. Coincidence?"
"I got to her first," House said. "Empty clinic, 2 pm. Couldn't keep her hormones under control."
"Her bed, 7 am. I spent the night. I wonder who's jealous now."
"Well, that still does not determine whose child it is! It does, however, determine that you did not please her!" House said loudly.
"Shut the hell up already! Even if it's your biological child, Cuddy wants me to be the father!"
"Ahem."
The sound of a clearing throat behind them.
House and Wilson turned around simultaneously to find that the door was open, and Foreman and Chase were standing at it.
"You guys are debating who knocked Cuddy up? Truly amazing." Chase's Australian voice rang with amazement.
"None of your business!' House closed the door on their faces.
Meditating, he opened it again, and Foreman and Chase looked confused.
His face was now serious and sacredly concerned.
"Don't tell Cameron. Or else."