(Author's note: I don't own Gorillaz. Or any actual gorillas, for that matter.)

Sunshine beamed down on the junky shores of Plastic Beach, causing Russel to raise his enormous hands to shield his eyes from the light. It was uncommonly hot, as the res of the band showed, with Murdoc showing way too much of his body on the rooftop trying to cool himself down while chugging down a bottle of rum, and 2D huddling under a craggy rock to keep in the shade. Noodle was in her little cave, fanning herself while scribbling in her notepad, looking up occasionally to scratch her face behind her mask. Russel didn't have an issue with the heat—all he had to do was dive down into the water and come back up to be cooled off. He did, however, have issues with the sun beaming down on his eyes and the water, blinding him from all directions. He growled his frustration and swam closer to the shady underbelly of Noodle's cave, sinking down far enough that only his head was visible above the water. Noodle poked her head down from the overhang and showed a big question mark on her notepad.

"I'm being blinded by this stupid bright sun and Murdoc's ugly backside."

Noodle decided she didn't want to know anything more and went back inside her cave. Russel muttered his annoyance at the crashing waters that were smacking his face at every opportunity. Suddenly, he heard a loud shrieking noise and jumped, just barely missing the ceiling of the overhang with his skull. He swam out, trying to find the source of the noise—it wasn't Noodle, she wasn't loud enough to make that kind of noise yet...

He felt something land on his head, and peered up with some difficulty, sun glowering down.

"Skrree?" the seagull asked, stomping its feet on Russel's head. Amused at first, the drummer swam out back into the water next to the shore to try to coax the bird off. The seagull was going to have none of that, and stood obstinately on his new reststop. Russel lost his amusement quickly, and flailed his arms around his head to get it off—it was an awfully persistent bird, however, and held its' ground. Indignantly, the seagull let out a loud "Skee!" and began pecking at its' perch.

"Ow! Get off, ya stupid featherhead!" Russel continued to unproductively wave his arms around his head, loudly splashing and shouting. 2D crawled out of the shadowing rock and stared, rather confused, at the flailing drummer. Murdoc only briefly looked up, then continued to ignore everything sulkily.

"Wos' going on, Russel?" 2D called out, squinting to see what was flying around Russel's head. Now several seagulls were crying out and gliding around Russel.

"Freaking birds won't leave me alone! Got a gun on ya, 'D?" 2D waved his hands in front of him negatively just as Noodle stomped out of her cave and ran next to 2D with a huge machine gun in her hands. "The heck, Nood-? !" 2D jumped two feet into the air when Noodle started shooting, aiming next to Russel's head to avoid hitting him. Murdoc responded to the rapid-fire with bolting up and shouting something along the lines of "WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! EVERY MAN FOR 'IMSELF! ABANDON ISLA-" before promptly tripping over his tanning chair with a thud—not that anyone else was noticing his drunken panic.

"Keep tryin', Noods, I think you got one!" Russel encouraged, even though it was obvious that not one seagull had been even grazed by the guitarist-turned-markswoman. 2D had gotten over his initial shock and was now just keeping himself at a safe distance from Noodle, pointing out helpful things like "You're missin', Noodle!" and "I don' fink this is working...". The gun ran out of bullets quickly, and Noodle, exasperated, sat down in defeat. The seagulls were now all standing on their victory—the shiny bald surface of Russel's head. "HOW DID YOU EVEN MISS?" Russel yelled in a rage. The birds flew off momentarily at the volume of the outburst, then returned back to their perch.

The two conscious bandmates stared at the predicament in front of them for several minutes, at a loss for what to try next. Noodle beckoned 2D closer and whispered in his ear. 2D nodded and called out, "Noods says you should try goin' underwater to get them off!" Russel took a gasp of air and sank down in the water, and the birds let go of their prize, bobbing up and down on the surface. It looked as if Noodle's idea had worked, but when Russel came above water, the rats-with-wings flew over to his head—one of which relieved itself, quite intentionally, on Russel's head.

Russel had enough.

He began flailing and splashing in the water in his frustration, causing the seagulls to start flying around in a tizzy. The newly created waves from this violent reaction rose up above 2D and Noodle, who started scampering in the other way as fast as they could. However, the roaring, foamy waves were much faster and swallowed the two up, leaving them on the shore with bits of plastic and various sealife on their persons. 2D looked in surprise at the flopping tuna in his arms, and a huge grin appeared on his face.

"'ey, Noods, lookit! I caught a fish!"

Noodle responded by spitting out some salty ocean water, staring as Russel continued his battle with the squawking seabirds.

The violent, splashy, feathery war lasted from afternoon to around 6 at night. After the second hour, the rest of the band continued with their day, trying to ignore the huge amounts of squawking and colorful language. Now, the squawking and the cursing was silent. Before heading into the complex, Noodle looked under her cave to find Russel's head bobbing in the water, head covered in crap and looking more irritated before. She noticed with a grimace that there were several bloody remains and feathers covering the wall-that was going to stink later. She quietly wandered up to the building and into the kitchen, where 2D was making a poor attempt to cut up the tuna he "caught" for a stirfry. She tapped his shoulder lightly, and he stopped cutting. "So...who won? Di' those birds do it all over 'im?"

Noodle picked up her notepad. Russel. But I think the birds made sure he wouldn't forget about them. 2D chuckled and started mutilating the fish again, but Noodle grabbed the knife out of his hand and started cutting it properly. She pointed upwards and said in a hoarse whisper, "Murdoc." 2D nodded and ran up the stairwell to the sundeck, calling for the bassist.

"Muds? Hey Muds, we're gonna 'ave dinner! An' I caught it! WheERGH!"

2D had found Murdoc, his puke-green and unattractive buttocks hanging out. "Well? Wot is it, faceache?" 2D, instead of answering this query, started rubbing at his eyes violently and making vague traumatized noises.

(Brain bleach not included, sorry. :C

This is so short...I didn't have much time to write it, heh. Next chapter will be longer, hopefully.)