Masquerade

Chapter 3: Why?

"Fear was my truth."

- Goo Goo Dolls, "All That You Are"

Those cerulean blue optics; how much had he missed them?

A lot, but he couldn't hesitate now; he needed to do this, otherwise it would be his own spark extinguished. His finger tightened on the trigger, ruby red optics trained on his target. Hesitation seemed to bloom in his CPU, but that was quickly dismissed. For his loyalty, he had to do this.

But why? Because he had been a fool? Because he had chosen the wrong side? Because he wanted the power to hold his freedom?

"You don't have to do this." Prowl's voice.

It snapped Jazz back to attention from his inner conflict and to the Datsun who stood in the clearing looking around for any sign that there was another in the area. It would be a lie to say that it didn't make his spark ach a little, knowing what he had to do but the special ops mech intended to push that aside. He never hesitated on a mission and he wouldn't now.

But no; that was a lie. His most important mission he had hesitated and failed. Jazz hadn't the nerve to do it, and thus he was where he was now. Hesitating yet again.

His optics catching the gleam of the sun reflecting off of Prowl's now perked door wings, the ex-Autobot watched the black and white mech intensely, like a cougar stalking its prey. It only took a moment for Jazz to realize that Prowl knew he was here, and knowing that there was no sense hiding, the Porsche proceeded forward into the clearing, uncaring of how noisy his approach was.

Prowl turned to Jazz as the mech approached, expression untelling of the thoughts in his CPU or the ache in his spark. He had been expecting an ambush or a surprise attack, but it made a part of him glad to be able to talk to Jazz face to face again. Because like this there was still a chance to bring him back. To save him.

Jazz stopped about ten paces from him, their optics matching gaze. In that moment, there was so much Prowl wanted to ask, to say, but the Autobot SIC knew that he'd have to take things slowly no matter how much he might want to delve into details.

Only one shot.

The thought echoed through his CPU, bringing a lance of ice to stab through his spark; though he didn't hesitate, throwing up all of his walls as the inner tactician in him set to work immediately.

"How long? If you're going to kill me then I at least want to know."

The saboteur visibly hesitated, his red optics glancing away for just an instant, and then back to him, the expression in them almost guilty. "Since the start, Prowler… Not even Prime noticed."

Jazz's voice crackled, and the Autobot SIC pressed further. "But why be with them when all they do is destroy? And for the love of Primus, why cover your tracks with me?" Now Prowl sounded hurt, almost angry even, but no, that wasn't how it was. He just wanted his Jazz back.

"I… the 'bots are going t' lose 'cause they're not strong, and I… I just don't want… I just want t' have the power to choose my way. Prowler yeh halfta understand that." Jazz was visibly shaking, his optics looking at the ground; gun slacked in his hand and at his side. "… And I never wanted t' get like… this with yeh. I never meant to get this far…. I…"

Finally Prowl understood – he had what he needed to win, and he had full intents on using it. "Jazz, the moment you joined the Decepticons so you could have the power to choose was the moment you stopped choosing. If you have freedom you can choose even in the harshest of situations; things may get hard, but power strips you of everything." The Datsun drew closer to Jazz with a cautious confidence, reaching out a hand to gently take the weapon away from the verbally defeated Porsche. "So tell me Jazz, what do you choose?"

For a moment, silence from both of them. Then a yelp from Prowl as he was taken to the ground, landing harshly on his door wings with a weight on top of him.

Jazz had flung himself at the tactician, arms curled around Prowl tightly as he trembled seemingly in a mix of emotions, coolant spilling from his optics and splattering down onto Prowl's black and white paint. And Prowl's strong arms returned the embrace despite the discomfort, one hand rubbing the saboteur's back in soothing, random patters. "Will yeh forgive me Prowler? Will Prime forgive me? Will they forgive me?" He truly did sound afraid now, like a lost sparkling looking for its way home.

"In time they will… in time."

Days passed, soon weeks, and during that time, they had both returned to the Autobots, Optimus forgiving, understanding the desperation, and others skeptical, but willing to give it a shot. Jazz, in the meantime, had stayed to carefully watched monitoring duty, and the Decepticons staying rather quiet for some time, though Megatron seemed to be enraged by the loss of his little spy.

The morning air was fresh and cool against his systems, and he had missed it quite a bit. As the reinstated Autobot third in command watched the sun rise for the first time in weeks, he felt an inner calm he had not felt for some time.
Slowly, his life was being rebuilt like the Decepticons had never played in his hand of becoming an Autobot, and all those whom had been angry at his betrayal (namely Ironhide), were starting to simmer down and accept that he was here to stay and willing to help the greater good this time.

"Nice view isn't it?"

A smile cross Jazz's face as he turned slightly, his feet still dangling off the edge of the cliff, to greet Prowl as he approached and sat beside the Porsche. Ever since he had come back, they had both spent more time together – Prowl wanting to get to know the 'real Jazz', and Jazz wanting to give it a sincere shot. Thus far, it had been like nothing had changed, excluding how close to each other that they were.

Jazz leaned his head against Prowl's shoulder, contently humming to himself, Prowl placing an arm around his shoulder and taking off the blue visor that Jazz had donned once again. Looking at him questioningly, the saboteur stopped humming. "Whatcha doin'?"

In response, Prowl merely leaned down and pressed a kiss to Jazz's lips, a chaste smile still lingering as he pulled away. "I just thought that you would've stopped wearing this."

To that Jazz just gave a shrug. "Just felt more natural 'round you guys."

A chuckle came from the tactician. "Well, you can leave it off for now because I want to get to know the 'natural' you…"

And in the light of the sunrise, they spark bonded, to be bound together, for as long as either of them lived.

~Owari

A/N: Tried somethinf different with my ending this time... feed back?

Thank-you to all those who commented and faved!

Now a preview for my next upcoming fic...

A smile.

That's all it took to consume him; just a quick little perk at the edges of those full lips and then he was sent away into a bliss he had never known before then. It made his spark feel alight with joy and affection – all those feelings his creator had tried to quash – and he loved it. It felt so right, just being there with that smile. It made all of those dull, monotone days seem that much more colourful, and to him, that was worth so much more than anything...

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Transformers G1 Fic

Northern Star - Coming Soon