SM owns all things Twilight. Due to some real-life experiences, I own this storyline.

Chapter 4

XXX – Breakthrough – XXX

Tanya came to my cube crying, late one Monday afternoon in September. We had been lagging on our usual lunch time rituals for the last several weeks because of her workout schedule. To see her cry was definitely not typical Tanya behavior. On her best days, that girl could be a cold hearted bitch.

I pulled her into an empty boardroom to talk. I didn't want her to make a scene and embarrass herself while sniffling and bawling her eyes out in front of the whole staff. She stood by the door and kept sobbing so I just stood there by her and did my best to comfort her until she was finally ready to speak. I couldn't understand why she'd come to work if she was this upset and, truth be told, she looked fine when we had had our regular morning meeting.

When she finally calmed herself down enough to emit coherent sentences, I was able to get her to tell me what the problem was. She shocked the hell out of me by confessing her affair with her trainer, only to drone on about all of the other affairs she had when they were in college, before they even had gotten married. I was livid. Knowing what I knew about Edward, I just couldn't imagine why she would do such a thing. The man was sex on legs, what the hell?

"But Bella, sex with Edward is just blah. I couldn't do it anymore." She sniffled. I wanted to punch her.

I looked her over and shook my head. "What about all that shit you used to tell me about the positions and whatever. You know, before you were married and we actually had lunch and hung out together."

"Oh, that was never with Edward." She sighed "I married him because it was the right thing to do. People expect things from me, Bella." Cue long, loud sob. "My parents always wanted me to marry a Doctor." More sniffles. "I love him but I can't do it anymore, I'm just not in love with him, Bella. Do you know what it's like to come home to someone you're not in love with?"

Actually, I don't. Bitch.

She took a seat in one of the chairs and palmed her face. Her sobs echoed in the room and could probably be heard throughout the office. After that confession about the kind of lying, cheating bitch she actually was, I didn't give a shit.

"So wait, you've been cheating on your boyfriend... husband, whatever" I flailed my hands around for emphasis "all of this time?" I almost screamed at her but calmed myself the fuck down by making a fist and digging my nails into the flesh of my palms.

She kept sobbing and I kept getting angrier and angrier. I wanted to bitch-slap her and pull out her hair. All of it.

"Well, I guess so. I mean, he's a great guy, kind, loving and sweet, but there's just no passion. You know?" She explained through a long exaggerated sob.

I put my hands on my hips and gave her an incredulous look "Passion?"

"Bella, he spends all of his time with his nose in a book or at the hospital working with his dad. His family is a big part of his life and for the life of me, I can't stand his mother. That woman drives me nuts." She shook her head and let out a long heady breath. "Did I ever tell you how many kids she wants me to have?" She inhaled and exhaled loudly, trying to calm herself down.

I had to concentrate on my breathing too so that I didn't pummel her. I had never been so angry in my life, especially about something that was completely none of my business. I mean, poor Edward.

"It doesn't sound so bad. Have you spoken to Edward about all of this?" I asked. I was sure the sarcasm in my voice was quite apparent, but again, I really didn't give a shit. Not that she even noticed.

"I will, tonight. My trainer, Tyler, he wants me to move in with him. I just don't know what to do, Bella. What do I do?" She sighed and kept hiccuping loudly.

"Well, when you speak to your husband" I put a lot of emphasis on that last word "maybe it'll be easier to figure out what you want." I tried desperately to tone down my sarcasm, but probably failed terribly.

She stopped crying and blew her nose when I handed her a tissue. "Edward will be crushed Bella. He loves me you know."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Rub it in- you dirty whore.

We discussed a few more possibilities but if I was honest with myself, my girlie bits were happy at the thought that maybe Edward would be single soon.

It was all wrong and depraved for so many fucked up reasons for me to feel that way. But I did. I wanted him more than I wanted air to breathe.

I was several shades of fucked up, it wasn't even funny.

The rest of the week was dismal at best. Tanya called in sick. All week.

I got stuck with her workload, again. Which meant that I was overworked, again.

Fucking Tanya and her fucked up life. My bad habit of swearing that I had maintained under strict usage had begun to slip up at the most inappropriate moments.

My boss, Lauren, had had to give me "the eye" at some point in the week, letting me know to tone it down a bit. The more stress I felt, the more expletives slipped out. It got to a point where I was surprised when anybody could get an actual sentence from me that didn't contain the word 'fuck'.

On Friday, I decided to get my head out of my ass and called Alice to give her the heads up about Tanya and Edward. I wasn't very big on gossip, but given the fact that Tanya hadn't been in all week, I wasn't sure what was going on with her and I knew that with what she had said on Monday, Edward would most likely be crushed.

It seemed only fitting that she know what was going on with her cousin. Right?

I ignored the part of my brain that just wanted to know if he was okay.

With my refurbished workload, I hadn't had time to meet up with Alice, or even speak to her for that matter, so when she said that Edward had been living on her couch for the last couple of nights while Tanya moved out of their apartment. I did a fist-pump and tried to figure out different ways to visit Alice while being inconspicuous.

That was okay, wasn't it?

I was just so happy to maybe be able to do something to help him out, I mean, it's not like I could really do anything. Well, I could make him feel better, in more ways than one. But I doubted anything female would have been welcomed into his home at that moment. It was too soon for him to get into something with someone else, but I could be his friend, couldn't I?

Unfortunately, my weekend plans were squandered with work and an early deadline. Our stupid marketing department supervisor had given me the wrong printing date for some fliers and I had to hurry and finish up the final designs so that they could be sent for approval and printing the following Monday. Thus rendering useless my eager plans of seeing the newly single object of my affection.

Fuck my life.

A/N: Thanks to my girls for all of your help with this and thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favored and put this story on alert.

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