Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 003

They'd been sitting like that for a while when Embry made his appearance in the doorway to their bedroom. "Hey, Jake. Hey, Bella. I just wanted to know if I need to get anything besides groceries and clothes while I'm out?"

"A toothbrush?" Bella asked quietly. She was a little bit tense in Embry's presence - Jacob could feel her body stiffen with stress - but she played it off, so he didn't say anything.

"Sure thing, Ms. Swan," Embry replied in a light, teasing tone. "Anything else?"

"Nah, dude, we're good," Jacob said when Bella didn't add anything else. "Do you need money?"

Embry shook his head and patted his right pocket. "Got it covered, bro."

He left and Jacob finally set Bella aside and got out of bed, going to grab a brush from his bag. He brought it back and sat Indian style on the bed behind her, then, starting at the bottom, he tenderly worked the tangles out of her long dark hair. Once they were gone, though, he kept brushing.

After awhile Bella moaned and leaned back against him, making it impossible for him to continue. "I love you, Jacob Black."

Jacob's heart swelled and he found himself blinking back tears for what seemed to be the hundredth time since he'd found Bella on the side of the road the night before. "I love you, too, sweetheart."

"Can we lay down? I hurt." Without waiting for an answer, Bella shoved and tugged at Jacob, maneuvering the both of them so that they were lying on their sides facing away from the open door. "Thanks," she said when she was comfortable.

Jacob chuckled lightly. "Don't thank me. You're the one who put me where you wanted me."

"Mm … Whatever." Bella was already beginning to doze. "Stay," she ordered him absently as she sank into slumber. As if he could ever leave her.

Jacob shook his head and sighed. So far things were going okay, but he didn't expect that to last very long. His Bella had been raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road. It was going to take a lot of time and patience to help her through this chapter of her life.

He wished he had a computer so that he could research rape victims, but even if he had happened to have one, there would have been no internet access. Since he and Embry didn't actually live there yet, they saw no need to pay for the internet, though they did have cable and a landline. Shit. He wished he'd thought to ask Embry to stop at the library and do some research.

Jacob was in luck, though, because Embry had the same idea. He came home not only with groceries, toiletries, and clothes, but with two books and several sheets of printer paper all about rape victims. Jacob started reading immediately, sitting up in bed beside Bella, who had woken up when Embry brought her stuff into the room.

Though she couldn't see what he was reading due to her swollen eyes, she could still clearly hear the pages turning. "What book are you reading, Jacob? Will you read it to me?"

EDIT!Jacob wasn't about to lie to her. "I don't think you want to hear this, Bella. It's about rape victims - I want to know how to help you heal from this." He held his breath. She would either be mad or she wouldn't; it was a fifty-fifty chance.

She didn't get mad, but she was quiet for a long moment. Finally, though, she said, "Oh. Okay." They left it at that.

He read for hours, stopping only when Bella needed something from him. He made quick work of the printer paper and started on the first book, which took a bit longer to read. By the time he finished reading it, his head hurt and he was nauseous, but it was all worth it in his opinion. He still didn't feel like he knew what he was doing, but he at least had some idea of what Bella was going through. That made it easier to help her.

For dinner, Bella agreed that they should join Embry in the dining room. Jacob helped her dress in a pink tank top with butterflies on it and a pair of dark jeans, then they left the room. She was quiet and a little bit tense, sticking close to Jacob, but it was progress. While Jacob and Embry ate hamburgers and fries, Bella sipped from her thermos filled with chicken noodle soup.

"Don't forget to call your Dad, Bella," Embry said at one point. He knew she hadn't called Charlie yet because there was only one phone, in the kitchen, and Embry had been in there the whole time.

"Oh, right." Bella didn't sound very enthusiastic, but neither boy blamed her. "Get me the phone and dial the number for me. I might as well get it over with."

Embry got the phone and handed it to Jacob, who dialed the number before handing it to Bella. Bella waited patiently for her father to answer.

"Hello?" Charlie sounded stressed out.

"Hi, Dad," Bella said.

"Bella! Young lady, don't you EVER run off without telling me again!" Charlie sounded more relieved than angry.

"I left a note," Bella lied easily. "Listen, I just need some time to myself. I'll probably be home in a couple of weeks."

"I understand you need space, but I wish you'd have at least taken Jake with you." Charlie sighed. "Then I'd KNOW you were safe."

Bella wished she could tell her Dad that she WAS with Jacob, to reassure him, but she knew it would ruin everything if she did. "I'll be fine, Dad. Look, I was just calling to check in. I'm going to go now. Love you."

"Love you, too," Charlie said gruffly.

Bella hung up. "Jacob, will you help me take a shower?"

Jacob almost choked on a fry, but managed to swallow it just in time. Embry smirked at him. "Sure, sure."

They finished their dinner in silence, then Jacob helped Bella down the hallway and into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and stripped, then turned to help her undress. He grimaced at the sight of her, feeling rage well up inside him once again. He shoved it aside and helped Bella into the shower, climbing in after her.

He washed her body tenderly but politely, then turned washing her hair into a head massage. She moaned, and his dick twitched, but he ignored it. He finished washing her hair and then quickly washed himself before helping her out of the shower. He toweled her dry first, and then himself. Then he led her into their bedroom.

Bella laid down and let Jacob once again disinfect her wounds and rub the bruise salve into her. He was tentative when he reached her breast, but she didn't say anything, so he went ahead and did it.

He helped her dress in a red tank top and white shorts, then he dressed himself in a black t-shirt and black boxers. He sat her down on the bed and then climbed up beside her.

"How are you feeling, Bells?" Jacob asked.

"Honestly?" Bella sighed. "I feel like shit, Jacob. I feel like this was my fault. Logically, I know it wasn't, but I can't help the way I feel."

"I hate that you feel that way." Jacob suddenly growled loudly. "I HATE this! I HATE that this happened to you! I love you SO much and I don't know how to help you and I HATE this!"

"Come here." Bella held her arms out to embrace him, turning her head in the direction his voice had come from.

Jacob took her in his arms and laid down so that they were facing each other, cuddled close together. "I love you SO much. I know you don't want to hear it, and I'm sorry, but when I see you like this … I just have to say it. I feel so MUCH that I have to let it out somehow."

"Jacob, I do want to hear it," Bella protested. "After - well, I NEED to hear it. Besides, I told you earlier, I love you too."

"Yeah, but you don't mean it in the same way." Jacob heard the bitterness in his own voice and could have kicked himself. She didn't need this now!

She was silent for a moment. When she spoke, her voice was shy. "When IT happened, I - I was actually on my way to tell you - to tell you that I'm in love with you."

Jacob's heart wrenched painfully. "You don't know what you're saying, Bella."

Frustrated, Bella reached up and pinched his nipple hard enough to make him yelp. "I'm serious, damn it! I'm in LOVE with you and you can either return the emotion or you can leave me but you WON'T just dismiss my feelings as nothing!"

Jacob cringed, feeling terrible. He said the only thing he could. "I'm in love with you, too, you know that. But now isn't really the best time for this, and you know it."

"I'm sorry!" Bella started to cry. "I can't help the way I feel! But you don't believe me, and I don't know what to do!"

"Oh, Bells." He sighed and tugged her closer. "I'm not trying to be a jerk. I'm just saying it's too soon after what happened for you to be declaring your undying love for me."

"I didn't say it was undying," Bella grumbled into his chest. Then, "It is, though. I'll love you until the end of my days, Jacob Black."

Jacob decided not to bother arguing any more. "I love you until the end of my days as well, Bella Swan." It was the truth.

There was a light knock and Jacob invited Embry in. He came to stand beside the bed on Bella's side, a couple of black notebooks and a fountain pen in his hands. "I know you can't see right now, Bella, but I got you these notebooks and the pen so you could write when your eyes are better."

She held out her hands for the items and he placed them in them. "Thank you so much, Embry," she said, touched by the thoughtful gift. "I'll DEFINITELY put them to good use."

"Cool." Embry smiled at them and left, closing the door behind them.

"That was really nice of him." Bella sounded a little choked up. "I wish I could write in them now."

"Well, how about you tell me what you want to say and I write for you?" Jacob suggested. Then he held his breath. He was asking her to REALLY trust him, more even than she already had.

"I don't know," Bella said quietly. Jacob's heart sunk. "Could you let me think about it for a while?"

"Sure, sure." Jacob just knew she wasn't going to do it. It was way too personal. He changed the subject. "Are you going to tell Charlie what happened to you when you go home?"

"NO!" Bella cried. She gripped his bicep with surprising strength. "You can't tell him either, Jacob! PROMISE ME!"

"Okay, I promise," Jacob told her, not at all surprised by her demand. "But I still want you to know that I think you SHOULD tell him."

Bella relaxed and loosened her grip on him. "I hear you, but I just CAN'T. Please leave it alone, Jacob."

Jacob sighed and kissed the top of her head. "Of course. I love you so MUCH, baby. Don't you know by now that I'll give you anything you ask for?"

Bella smiled and cuddled closer to him, actually sliding one of her legs between his. "I love you, too. You don't have to believe me, but Jacob, I would DIE for you. I would - I would KILL for you!"

"I'm going to kill for you, Bella," Jacob reminded her. His voice had hardened. "I can't let this go, what they did to you. I know their scents and I'm going to hunt them down and kill them as soon as I know that you're okay."

"Shush, Jake," Bella whispered, petting his chest through his t-shirt. "I know. Now come on, I'm tired. Let's sleep." She turned around so that her back was against his chest and he was spooning her. "Mm. Much better. I always feel SO safe in your arms, Jacob."

Jacob blinked back tears. He didn't say anything; he just squeezed her briefly and then watched over her as she slept.