AUDITION
Santana knew Quinn. They may not always get along, and they could go weeks without having an actual conversation, but they were friends. Well, friends by New Directions' standards anyway. So she had more than enough reason to be on her heels. Quinn Fabray with Jesse St. James? No. Something was up. Especially considering where Quinn left off last year. Fat chance in hell she was just going to let Quinn and the douche go through with whatever the hell they were going through with.
"Who do you think you're playing?"
Quinn slowly turned away from her opened locker upon hearing Santana's voice. These conversations were always a joy. "Playing?"
"We don't hang out once over the summer. The last time we really talked you were basically trying to kill glee from the inside, and now you start this year off with Jesse St. Hairspray. Do you honestly think we're that stupid?"
"Clearly." Quinn said dryly before going into a half-assed explanation. "I wasn't even going to do glee this year. The only reason I rejoined was because Jesse talked me into it." That wasn't exactly a lie. More like blackmailed but whatever. "And all he wants to do is prove he can still win a national competition." Also not exactly a lie. He also wanted to win to impress Rachel and be gross like that.
Santana let out a humorless chuckle. "Just the purest of intentions, right?"
"Something like that." Quinn gave her polite-smile. It was really just a smirk. Santana knew this. She had one of her own.
"Morning." Jesse's voice greeted them. Quinn was the first to break eye contact as she turned to face her non-lovable buddy. Buddy Holly just traded glances with both girls. "What am I interrupting?"
"Santana thinks we're going to end glee or something." She explained.
"Oh." He responded with as much disinterest as possible. "Here. For your mother." He handed her the white plastic bottle he was carrying.
Quinn scowled down at the label. "What is it?"
"Neem Oil for her hydrangeas." Gardening was Judy's latest hobby. This, too, did not work. "It's supposed to keep the leaves from getting rust stains."
Quinn turned and placed it in her locker. "I'm sure she'll be thrilled."
"Now, now. There's no need to be jealous." Jesse grinned as she tensed and instinctively slammed her locker. That was always fun to get under Quinn's skin with.
Santana just looked back and forth between the two of them. "Q, you've out done yourself in the weird factor." Santana regained their focus. "You better not be screwing with us." She warned before strutting away.
Jesse watched her go. "I guess that's to be expected."
She hoped he wasn't dumb enough to be disappointed by this. That would mean he was dumb enough to be hoping otherwise. Of course New Directions didn't trust him. Other than the Rachel angle, Quinn still didn't really have any idea why he'd choose to pursue this.
"You know, so far, this is becoming quite the hassle." Jesse complained, and they headed away from her locker.
"You're the one who wanted to audition everyone for absolutely no reason."
"There is plenty of reason. Think of this as a test. I will be able to gauge how willing they are to-"
"Cooperate. I know. I still think it's pointless."
"Personally, I'm just looking forward to seeing what you audition with." He teased her, and she stuttered in her pace. "If you feel like adding some depth to your performance and choose a song that best describes you as I'm sure others are going to, may I recommend Meredith Brooks' 'Bitch.' It's fairly fitting."
"Wait a minu-"
"However, if you choose to go with a more traditional-"
Quinn stepped in front of him, stopping his path. "You never said I had to audition."
"Well Quinn, it'd hardly be fair if you didn't. Think of the scandal." He smirked and walked around her. She rolled her eyes before following.
As the pair walked down the hallway, they were unaware of a certain group of boys watching them from behind.
"They've gotta be taking over the world." Mike guessed.
"Either that or starting a merry band of serial killers."
"Kurt." Blaine chided.
"What? Blaine, I'm sorry, but you just don't know them as well as we do." Kurt wrote him off.
Blaine tilted his head skeptically. "Serial killers?"
"You never know."
"That's true, and Quinn can be something to fear." Artie reminded them all.
"Exactly." Kurt nodded his head once before lifting his chin slightly. "I used to overlook her because she was blonde, but she's somewhat of a loose cannon now."
"Now?" Puck frowned. "Man she's always kinda freaked me out. You know, one minute she'd be all sweet, and then she'd be yelling at me. I know. I lived with her."
"Yeah, but wasn't that when she was pregnant?" Sam reasoned.
"Uh-huh, and she was nowhere near as scary then. Which is pretty much the opposite of what should happen."
"Got nothing on Santana, though." Mike voiced and they all shuddered in agreement.
"Nope." Puck was the only one to disagree. "My girl owns on instilling fear."
"Yes, along with installing a ball and chain." Kurt pestered.
"Hey."
"Isn't it possible that you're all overreacting?" Blaine questioned them. There was a chorus of "no's" aside from Sam who nodded.
"I'm sure they're just friends."
"You're just saying that because you're still hung up on Quinn." Mike cut in.
"Uh, no. Trust me when I say I really don't care about Quinn's romantic life." Sam assured. "I just doubt anything's going on. It's not like they're planning anything."
Artie looked from Sam up to Kurt. "He's still pretty new too."
Kurt nodded. "Right. They are definitely planning something."
"So does this mean we're not auditioning because I have the perfect solo?" Blaine smiled enthusiastically.
Sam shook his head. "Well I'm totally going to."
Puck shrugged. "Lauren isn't worried about anything so we'll be there."
"I can't even sing." Mike sighed. "It's not like he's going to take me. We have more than twelve people without me."
"Yeah, but you can dance." Artie praised. "And there's only like three people in glee who can actually do that. You're needed. What about me? Somehow I don't think Jesse has a great sympathy for what he'd view as handicapped."
"Well, I for one, think we should all go." Kurt gave his answer. "Let's face it, the only people Jesse St. Sucks would willingly take are Rachel and now Quinn. He can't have a glee club with only two people."
"So then we're all going?" Sam wanted to know. They all responded positively.
"Awesome. I'm so excited." Blaine bounced a little.
"Of course you are. You're Blaine." Kurt happily patted his shoulder.
Unlike his teammates, however, one New Directioninger boy did not plan on being in that auditorium at 3:00 today.
"He's using you. I don't get how you can't see that." Finn secured his book and shut his locker. Rachel sighed next to him. This wasn't the first time Finn has said something of the sort since yesterday afternoon.
He was seriously worried that Rachel was so blinded by this guy. It didn't make sense how she couldn't see that he treated her like crap. There was no way he was going to support any of this. He'd rather die than go to that audition today….okay, well that's extreme. He'd rather lose his saved Halo game. But still why did they even have to audition? It was their glee club.
"Jesse is not using me, Finn." Rachel repeated the answer she gave him last night.
"He basically said he wants you back."
"Yes, but that does not mean he's using me."
"Fine. But he's using glee." Finn gave a slight shrug and walked away.
"Finn." She called after him to no avail. "Finn." She tried once more before he was out of her sight.
She could understand Finn's concern, she really could. He was obviously insecure that Jesse was going to come in and sweep her off her tiny feet. It was completely viable given their history. But she didn't think it was fair that he was allowed to be so concerned with her ex yet she still had to face his every day without a second thought. Though the lie long forgiven by now, Santana was still a reminder that he was shallow enough to go there instead of waiting for true love. And Quinn was of course Quinn. The same Quinn that was now at Jesse's side, apparently.
Rachel didn't like this relationship. What if they ended up giving birth to a litter of skilled, attractive, singing liars? Ohio wouldn't stand a chance, and it was completely possible. Everyone knew Quinn was fertile. In the blink of an eye, something that could only be the equivalent of a cambion will be in their midst. Just watch. And Finn of course didn't seem worried about any of this. He, again, was too busy focusing on Jesse's feelings for her. Which may actually turn out to be a good thing after all. If he was still in love with Rachel, he couldn't be off making mystical children with Quinn, right?
Then again, from a rational perspective, as Finn so delicately put it: They were simply screwed. She was already friends with Jesse, and if she was going to be seeing him every day, she couldn't very well avoid him to placate Finn. She has always enjoyed spending time with Jesse. He was able to understand her in ways no one else possibly could even if they tried. And if he did stay on as instructor, then it was a high probability that she could help him lead them to Nationals. Combining their ideas would at the very least get them into the top ten. It would put a strain on her and Finn, though.
Not to mention, she was the most talented one in glee. Jesse would choose her before everyone else because he always went with the best option when it came to performing; regardless of the consequences. Except she really didn't want everyone in glee to go back to hating her. She had actual friends now, and those who weren't her friends at least tolerated her. She was eventually going to have to have a discussion with him about this. And besides, she was assigned to talk to him anyway.
It was decided yesterday in glee after Jesse, Quinn, and Finn all made their exits that Rachel needed to talk to their newest instructor. Someone needed to do it, and Rachel was considered to be the best candidate. Lackadaisical chickens. So it was Rachel who needed to give up her lunch to find out what Jesse was up to if he was up to anything. And if he wasn't up to anything, then she had to find out why he was forcing them to audition and if he planned on being fair. She was also somehow supposed to ensure that he be fair if he wasn't. She also could get rid of him if she chooses. Maybe. It was a lot of orders all being thrown at her all at once. There's a slight possibility that she misinterpreted.
It took her longer than expected to find him during his assigned lunch hour. (She got this information from Principal Figgins. Her conversational manipulation skills still worked properly. It's good to test these types of things on occasion.) Jesse was not in the choir room which was her first choice. Then she checked the auditorium only to find it empty. After resisting the urge to perform a solo, she moved on to the teachers' lounge and there was no Jesse, but there was Sue Sylvester who made some inane threats about never coming back to that room. She finally found him in the student cafeteria eating lunch alone with Quinn. Rachel wasn't sure, but from her perspective this was wildly inappropriate. Not even Mr. Schue ever ate lunch with the student body.
"Hello, friends." Rachel brightly greeted the two at their table. She wondered if her acting wasn't up to par and if they could tell it was a fake smile. Considering who she was talking to they probably did. "I was just wondering if I could have a moment of your time." She looked to Jesse.
"Certainly." Jesse began. "That wouldn't be a pro-"
"I'm going to get some more dressing." Quinn shut the plastic lid on her salad and headed across the room to the now shortened lunch line. The two left behind watched her go.
Rachel removed her smile and sat down next to him. "Quinn doesn't like me very much."
He unscrewed the cap to his cranberry juice. "I'm not sure Quinn likes anyone very much."
"And yet you've decided to date her."
Jesse paused mid-sip upon Rachel's question. Well, this could prove to be somewhat informative. "Does that bother you?" He set his drink back down, sitting up in his seat.
"Well, it's just you two don't seem to have much in common. I mean you're so professional and theatrical, and Quinn is so, Quinn."
"Considering who you've chosen to tie yourself to, I don't think you're in any position to judge."
"Is that why you're with her?" She questioned coyly. "Because I got back together with Finn?"
Jesse laughed tiredly. "It never fails to stay the same does it?" He watched her frown before continuing. "You can rest assured, Rachel, because Quinn and I aren't a couple."
"But you just…" She trailed off, frown in place, and Jesse waited until she caught up. So close now. "You said you spent the summer with her."
"Yes, I did. Platonically so. Quinn and I are friends."
"Like you and me?"
"Sure."
"Then why didn't you tell me about this newfound camaraderie with Quinn?"
"And when exactly was this conversation going to take place? When you were spending all your time with Finn or when you were asleep?"
"I resent that implication. I made time for my friends several times over break. I spent countless hours with Kurt and by extension Blaine."
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't Kurt live with Finn?" She looked down in guilt, and Jesse figured that was enough fun for today. "Look, I'm friends with both you and Quinn so let's leave it at that."
"Except it's not entirely the same." She half-shrugged. "You said you wanted to win me back. And if you're just friends with Quinn, then that's different."
"I would love for us to have a second chance at romance." He told her. "But it's your life and your choice, and if that choice is Finn, then I'm going to leave you two alone even if I don't necessarily agree with your decision. Frankly, I don't plan on interacting with Finn at all. There really needn't be a discussion about this."
Rachel, to her credit, waited a beat before speaking again. "Why are you auditioning us? You already know who the best singers are in glee."
"Maybe I just like messing with all of you."
"Are you going to exclude Finn for personal reasons?"
Jesse refrained from shaking his head. He would love to do that to Finn, sure, but that would mean crushing the Finnsect and he already established that he was above that. He seemed to remember just telling her all of this.
"Rachel, can you keep a secret?" He leaned in on the table. She did the same.
"Uh-huh." She whispered.
"I'm taking everyone who auditions." He leaned back and away again.
She also leaned back. "So this is a game to you."
"No. I've always felt games to be enjoyable."
"Then why do it at all?"
"It's just a simple test."
"That seems rather pointless." She concluded.
"Why does everyone keep saying that?"
"Saying what?" Rachel and Jesse looked across the table to Quinn who had returned; salad dressing and all.
"That my audition test for order within glee has no point behind it." Jesse informed, and Quinn wanted to roll her eyes at the fact he obviously filled Rachel in on his true reasoning.
"Probably because it doesn't." Quinn said instead and retook her seat.
"We'll see about that. Those who show up at 3:00 are the ones who will obviously listen to my direction in the future. Today will pave the way."
"Until next week when everyone forgets what happened this week."
"Yes or until you give me a solo over someone else." Rachel added. "Even if I am the most deserving."
Quinn this time did roll her eyes and looked to Jesse. "Or if you give a solo to someone who isn't Rachel."
"That's not true." Rachel disputed, prompting Quinn to give her an incredulous look. "Only I would complain about that. But if you give me a solo, everyone will be upset. Glee is filled with hypocrites."
Quinn couldn't argue any of this. She did have a point. "And liars."
"Cheaters."
"Morons."
"Nuisances."
"Manipulators."
"Immature children."
"Backstabbers."
"Lackadaisical chickens."
Quinn frowned at this one causing Rachel to look at the table somewhat sheepishly. Jesse watched this quirk of an exchange with some interest. For one thing, Rachel seemed to go into uneasy-mode which wasn't an everyday sight. She was usually too trusting. As for Quinn, well, she just seemed to rebuild her poise and make sure her all-important walls were in order. Almost like having an honest conversation with Rachel Berry was a big crime or offense. He rolled his eyes at the both of them. It must be some type of a girl thing that he just wasn't privy to.
"So what are you thinking of auditioning with?" Jesse asked Rachel, bored now by their silence.
"Oh." Rachel was jolted back. "Um…the usual." She spared a glance at Quinn before focusing back on Jesse. "Actually I should probably go practice it."
"I'm sure you'll be beyond great."
"Still. Extra rehearsals can never hurt."
He shrugged as she left them and turned back to the one he was still with. She was just using her fork to play with her salad. Jesse wished this world wasn't so sexist. If it wasn't, he would hit her. Ridiculous double standards. This was becoming more than tiring.
Quinn has been retreating since the last week before school started. According to that Intro to Psychology book he purchased but never opened, the two were obviously connected. "Therapy" has been halted. Every conversation they've had over the last week had either been about New Directions or a generality that had no relevance toward anything. This was one of his reasons for conquering glee at McKinley this year. He'd be damned if he let all of their progress slip away because of something as insignificant as high school. He figured if he was in reaching distance, then she may be a little less detached from everything going on around her. Plus, he knew she liked to sing, though she'd never admit it to him, and finding something Quinn likes was like finding a four-leaf clover. He didn't think she should have to give that up just because she was tired of everyone else in the club. So he made her a deal. If he took over as instructor, then she would have to rejoin.
His other reasons were just as humble. His first one was Rachel and all things Rachel. Clearly. His second was his future. Perhaps this endeavor could fix his future as this would easily be considered charitable by most collegiate applications. The third was being able to beat Vocal Adrenaline. Nothing would give him greater satisfaction than triumphing over his former team. He now knew what all those professional athletes his dad pays attention to meant once they've been traded. The only setback was that he'd have to coach New Directions. Did he ever mention that they were terrible? Because they were. No really. You should've seen their auditions.
Quinn went first. She sang some modern-pop-acoustic thing that he didn't even bother asking her about. As soon as she was done she joined him at what he referred to as the judge's panel in the seats. This was the only reason she went first. He wasn't too sure as to why considering all she did was sit next to him and do homework or something. He had long since berated her on the importance of not wasting time by studying anything that wasn't directly related to whatever future she chooses for herself. It was one of the many never-ending arguments between them, and frankly, he was sick of the unnecessary headaches. He let Quinn be and instead tried to focus on the stage. Though, he didn't see the need as he could've scripted all of this without it actually taking place. Predictable was also something to be used to describe New Directions.
After Quinn, Artie was up. He did some soft rock. Tina was next. She sang something foreign that he hopes he never has the misfortune of hearing again. Mercedes went with Jennifer Hudson, and someone needs to tell her to stop trying so hard. She was no J-Hud. Sam did some country crap that has no place in a show choir. Mike had a nice interlude and admitted to not being able to sing but then did some extravagant dance number. Finally Rachel came on and Jesse perked up. As expected she did a Broadway classic and nailed it. Oh right. Kurt also did something from Broadway, he should probably mention that. Kurt's nameless boyfriend followed and went with something contemporary. Puck did classic rock. He was pretty sure Santana chose something that fit her vocals. He wasn't paying attention at that point and opted to play tic-tac-toe with Quinn instead. Brittany closed it all out with a jovial folk song that gained his interest momentarily because as a person, she was someone in the club he didn't actually hate. The fat one also sang a song.
Like Quinn, the moment one of them finished, they took a seat in the auditorium chairs. When Jesse was sure the torture was over with, he stood to address all of them. He probably shouldn't have done that as auditions apparently weren't over. It never occurred to him that people who weren't in the choir room yesterday may actually want to join. (Why would they?) Luckily there were only two. The first one was a small blonde girl who introduced herself as Becky Jackson. Upon her entrance Quinn passed him a note that just read 'Be nice.' He soon figured out why, and can he just say that he found it sad that someone who had Becky's disabilities was legitimately better and more enthused than some of the other "performers" he had to watch today. Anyway, the second one was yet another singing sports player. He was in a letterman jacket. Probably for football. It was the only sport anyone's ever heard of by choice.
"What the hell?" Sam voiced what everyone seemed to be thinking.
Mike narrowed his eyes. "No way."
Considering Quinn actually sat up beside him, Jesse thought it might actually mean something so he did the same. "Is there a problem, gentlemen?" He sighed, bored. Really, what had he been thinking with these auditions? Nothing was ever easy with these people.
"Yeah, there's no way this punk is joining." Puck crossed his arms and glared at the stage.
"Any particular reason? It can't be for talent purposes." There wasn't a possibility that they were concerned with only letting the best in. Well, if that were true, there'd only be one member.
"He threatened Kurt's life." Kurt's nameless boyfriend supplied.
Rachel turned around in her seat to face her ex. "Not to mention he's an all-around bully."
"So what?" Santana interrupted, defending her friend. "He's apologized for all of that."
"You only think that because you guys were 'dating' last year." Mercedes air-quoted.
"Watch it, Wheezy. Otherwise I'll be airing out your own dirty little secrets." She looked at the back of Sam's head. "Obvious much?"
"My fellow soon-to-be glee clubbers, I think we should hear what he wants to sing." Kurt stood, gaining their attention and keeping this from getting out of hand. "Glee is about acceptance and second chances. Most of us wouldn't still be here if we didn't believe in forgiveness. If I've forgiven him for his actions, there's no reason why you shouldn't."
"Kurt." Mercedes said plainly. Her boy didn't seem to be thinking clearly.
"No." He shook his head. "Look around you. There are several people in this club who used to be bullies. Not to mention homophobic." He glanced at the now changed Puckerman. "There's no reason we can't do the same for Dave."
"Fine, but if Karofsky tries anything, he's gonna have to deal with me." Puck warned. "I'm off probation this year."
"Can we please dispense with the melodrama?" Jesse sighed again, rubbing his temples. "As a group, none of you can actually pull it off convincingly." He addressed the boy on stage. "You can begin your song when you please." Don Karofsmithsonian –or whatever his name was– began his number once the rest of the club settled back down. As jock #54 sang his song, Jesse leaned over to quietly speak to Quinn. "Should I be worried?"
"You should at least be on alert."
"Lovely." Jesse deadpanned and refocused on the stage.
The be-on-alert boy did an adequate job. Better than some others, and definitely better than the one who didn't show up. He was pleasantly surprised by this as opposed to everything else. Jesse was sure that Rachel would've run to tell Finn that everyone who auditions were being taken after lunch today. Apparently she didn't. (Another little test Jesse was running.) Unless she did in which case Finn really did not want to be a part of the new New Directions. Regardless of what actually took place, being the hypocrite he was, Finn showed up at tomorrow's meeting anyway. As promised, everyone who auditioned was on the New Directions sheet Jesse posted in the hall the next morning. Poor wittle Finny must have felt left out.
Around five minutes after the first official glee practice started, Finn walked into the choir room. Everyone in the chairs focused in on their lost leader, and Jesse had to stop his intro speech. "Finn." He greeted. "Lose something?"
Finn stepped up beside him. "No. I changed my mind. I'm not going to abandon my teammates now."
"That's a lovely gesture, but I don't seem to remember posting you on the list of people who made the team. In fact, I don't even remember you at the auditions yesterday. To be fair, I could be mistaken. I easily could have dosed off and not have noticed."
"Look, you've heard me sing. You've seen me dance. Why do I need to audition?"
"You're right. Unfortunately I have. However, auditions took place for a reason."
"Fine. Then I'll audition right now. I don't think anyone would mind."
"I'd mind." Quinn muttered, staring off into space. Jesse grinned at her response momentarily before facing Finn again.
"Finn, I'm afraid we just don't have the time right now. I can't afford you to cut into my practice any more than you already have." He paused before doing the bigger man thing. "Please just take your seat." Finn frowned at Jesse's decision but did as was asked and sat down next to Rachel.
"Now as I was saying before I was interrupted, this is a new year." Jesse began his address again. "It's going to be unlike anything you've ever experienced. I am not a teacher and this is not a classroom. There aren't going to be weekly assignments or life changing lessons. The only thing you will learn in here this year is how to be better performers. I will take your meager little glee club and make it into a winning show choir. If you have a problem with any of this, there are two exits behind me and one to my right." Jesse waited and no one made a move. "Good. Now like I said, no assignments. If you want to go off and sing random songs together, that's fine but do it on your own time not mine. The only thing we're going to do is focus on the three competitions of the year. There is nothing you won't know better than our competition numbers. I want you to know the chorography so well that you'll randomly find yourself doing steps throughout the day. If you're chosen to sing, I want you to know the song so well that you could sing it backwards if I asked you to. This is the only way to win."
"That's not really how we do things here." Finn interrupted.
"Three doors, Finn." Jesse returned. "Choose one now. If you have no desire to win, then I have no use for you." He looked back at the group. "That goes for everyone."
"Look, I wanna win just as bad as everyone else." Finn continued. "But it's not all about winning in glee. We do other things."
"Yeah." Mercedes nodded. "You know, being a part of something special makes you special and all that."
Jesse just looked perplexed. "Oh dear God, who filled your head with that notion?" Based on their faces, he just offended most of them. Great. Why the hell were these people so sensitive? "Look, I have no problem with your absurd need to express yourselves, but it can't get in the way of competition rehearsals." He offered and gained a subtle nod of approval from Quinn. Yesterday they had talked about certain sacrifices and promises he was going to have to make in order for this to work. (He didn't necessarily have to follow through on any of them.) "I just won't being doing Schuester's whiteboard assignment gimmick."
"I'm okay with that. He totally stole that idea from Spanish class." Brittany nodded sagely.
"I also agree with Jesse's new method." Rachel spoke up. "Though I will always value the time we spent with him, I'm afraid Mr. Schuester didn't always seem to put his heart into it. Often times his mind seemed to be elsewhere."
"I think we can agree on the fact that as an adult Schuester sucked, but we all know you're just agreeing because you want every solo." Santana glared two rows down at Rachel.
"Ah, but no." Jesse jumped back in. "See that's where my exception comes in. There is one assignment that we will have via me, and that's duets week."
"We did duets week last year." Kurt told him.
"Good, then I shouldn't have to explain what they are." Jesse smirked. "I think you'll find that my duets week is a little different. As freshmen at Carmel we started the year off with this assignment. It will allow me to fully see who compliments who. Afterward, Santana, I'll know who's the best, who's next in line, and those who will only be background singers. This will keep from me playing favorite." He looked to Mercedes. "Rules are simple. One: Everyone will be performing three duets with three different people. I don't care who you sing with, but I recommend choosing someone who will blend evenly with you. This is how I'll be picking who sings at competitions. Two: You have to say yes to anyone who asks you. This is to save me the extra headaches. Three: You'll be singing in a random order. This week will be rehearsals, next week will be performances. If you don't have one duet ready, you can't perform your other two."
"Wait." Tina frowned. "Doesn't that mean you'll be here for another week?"
Jesse smiled. "Funny how that worked out." He walked over to the piano and pulled a clipboard out of his bag. "Once you have your three partners, write your name and who you're singing with on here." He set the clipboard on top of the piano. He watched them do nothing and sighed. "Now."
That scattered them from their seats. Some were instant choices. Kurt and his nameless boyfriend. Puck and that girl he was dating. Rachel and Finn. All a joke of course. Honestly, someone needed to tell these people that it was possible to perform with someone you weren't dating. Other immediate choices he noticed were: Brittany and Santana, Sam and Mercedes, Tina and Artie, and Mike and Becky. Jesse sat at the piano bench and stopped paying attention after that, deciding to just let them run wild.
"Hey." Sam approached Quinn. "So we sang together last year at Sectionals and everything, and our voices sound good together so I was just wondering if you wanted to try again this year. Singing I mean. Nothing else."
"That'd be fine, Sam."
"Cool." He went towards the piano to presumably fill in his name.
Kurt meanwhile was getting his step-bother's attention. "You, me, duet."
"Sure." Finn nodded and tried not to be obvious as he watched Puck go over to his girlfriend.
"So I'm thinking we should win this using some Jew on Jew action."
Rachel smiled. "As long as you only mean in song, then I would love to sing with you, Noah."
"I could live with that for now." He winked before walking away to find his third partner just as Blaine was finding his own.
Blaine interrupted Santana and Karofsky's conversation. "We're going to sing something. And by rule, you can't refuse." Blaine not at all hilariously stepped up to Karofsky.
"I'm fine with that." Karofsky shrugged while Santana glared at the hobbit giving Berry a run for her money. Blaine eyed Karofsky suspiciously before stalking off. Santana patted her friend on the shoulder and just pointed at Mercedes who nodded in return. Undisputed Top Bitches gots this one. Santana went to the clipboard, cutting everyone in line while Mercedes continued over to Kurt.
"It's a crime we haven't already done this without a Cheerios uniform. I'm thinking something classic." She grinned at her bestie. He returned it.
"Well I would absolutely lov-"
"No, he's mine." Rachel cut him off, grabbing onto his arm.
Mercedes frowned. "I thought it was first come first serve."
Rachel ignored her. "Kurt, if we sing together, there's no possible way we can lose."
"Yeah, and if we sing together, we can gossip about glee." Mercedes countered lightheartedly.
"I can do that." Rachel amended.
He slowly pulled his arm way. "Mercedes did ask first."
"Kurt." Rachel cried out indigently.
"Rachel, I'm sorry, but me and Mercedes have both been so busy this summer that we haven't really spent that much time together." He shrugged sadly.
"And why am I the one who suffers because of it?" She whined and Mercedes just rolled her eyes before going to fill out her completed list. "Kurt, these duets are going to show Jesse who the best performers are."
"Exactly. He's not picking which duet gets to perform during competitions. He's just picking the best singers, and our talent is impossible to overlook. Not singing together now doesn't mean we won't get a chance later." He shrugged again before also heading to the piano.
She sighed and studied what glee members were still left. Rachel could sing with any of them of course, it wasn't exactly a problem. She turned around and found a workable option.
"Quinn?" Rachel put on her biggest smile.
"No."
"Quinn, if I may say-"
"No."
"I need another partner, and our duet went off perfectly last year. Besides, singing with someone whose voice if much softer than mine will prove my range."
Quinn inhaled and waited before letting out. "No."
Rachel stomped her foot. "You have to say yes. It's in the rules."
"No I don't."
Rachel raised her hand. "Jesse?" She turned to him.
Jesse looked up quickly from his phone and across the room to Rachel. "Yes, Rachel."
"Quinn's refusing to sing with me."
"Oh my God, did you just tell on me? Are you five?"
Jesse sighed. "Quinn, don't make this any harder on me. Just sing with her. I'd be shocked if you cared about any of this. Don't pretend to start now. "
Quinn stared between Jesse, who went back to doing whatever the hell he was doing on his phone, and a gloating Rachel Berry. "Ugh, fine."
Rachel clapped excitedly. "This allows me to reach into an entirely different repertoire."
"Please just go away."
"Okay."
The rest of the room finished up in the next couple of minutes until everyone had three partners. Or at least they were supposed to. Jesse looked down at his clipboard, and over to the three people he didn't see on here.
"What's the problem?" Jesse asked. He came up with three duets a piece. (Carmel was five, but he found that too extreme for New Directions.) He didn't see how this was a problem.
"I'm two short." Puck's girlfriend said.
"I need one more." Artie told him.
"Me too." Mike informed.
"I'll sing with both of them." Artie volunteered quickly to everyone's surprise. "It's very possible for someone in a wheelchair to do more than asked of them." He hinted.
"Yeah, whatever." Jesse tossed him the clipboard. "Look, anyone want to take on an extra duet and sing with…" He trailed off at a loss. "Her?" He pointed to Puck's girl.
"I'll do it." Sam offered.
"Great." Jesse waited until they were done filling out the sheet and was approached by Quinn and Puck's girlfriend. The girlfriend shoved the clipboard into his chest.
"My name's Lauren." She told him before walking away and going back to being Puck's girlfriend.
Jesse looked to Quinn. "You told me that yesterday didn't you?"
"Uh-huh." She sidled up next to him to lean on the piano.
He rubbed his chest. "I should probably start listening." He set the clipboard down in his lap. He didn't remember this many at Carmel. "That's a lot of duets." He sighed and began counting them.
"What are you doing?"
"Figuring how much torture I'm in for next week."
"You don't count all of them. You'll end up with twice as many."
"What are you talking about?"
"Jesse, this is like fifth grade math."
"Well I have no use for math."
She sighed. "Fine count them all just divide what you get by two."
Quinn waited while he took entirely too long to get to an answer. When he finally did, it came out to be twenty five duets total; five a day. Jesse wasn't too happy about this, and Quinn had no idea how they were all going to be ready by next week. Plus, she wasn't exactly excited about anyone she was singing with.
"I do believe we're quite popular." Jesse mused. Quinn gave him a questioning look, and he nodded over to where Rachel and Finn sat talking to Kurt and Mercedes. "The happy couple has been steadily watching our interaction." Rachel and Finn looked away quickly.
Quinn just shook her head. "Why do I get the feeling that this year is going to be exceptionally longer than the last two?"
When Rachel and Finn looked over again, the pair just decided to send the happy couple a nice, synchronized wave.