Wes's Many Attempts to Ask Kurt Out as Documented by The Warblers
Part 1
Attempt One
"The Squeak"
'Twas a fine morning. Afternoon. Sorry David.
'Twas a fine afternoon at Dalton Academy. All was well in the world. The students were enjoying a period off for staff meetings, frolicking (let it be noted that only Jeff and Nick were frolicking. The rest were hanging around, being manly) in the courtyard of the boarding houses.
One young gentleman, a fellow by the name of Kurt Hummel was preening himself under the shade of a large tree. Next to him was his good friend, David Elborne, who was avidly reading a young adult teenage vampire romance novel.
As we were saying, all was well in the world. That is, until another friend of Mr Hummel's, a strapping young man by the name of Wes Kearney, ran up to Kurt and, in a very ungraceful way, collapsed in a heap in front of him. David did not look up from his book.
Kurt, however, raised an eyebrow. "Wes? Are you okay?"
The boy nodded, panting. "I... Just... Wanted... To... Say... Hi."
Kurt was too amused to see David facepalm. "Well, Wes, that's nice."
Wes rolled onto his back and rolled between David and Kurt. "So..."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Anything you want to say, Wes?"
David stood up abruptly. "I have to be... Elsewhere. You two have a nice... Talk." He stared at Wes for a moment in a slightly and then ran off.
What the two others didn't notice was that he gathered up the rest of the Warblers and they all crept up behind the tree. Wes coughed nervously, opened his mouth and...
Was that a squeak?
"Wes, are you okay?"
"I-" And he ran off.
What was that about?
Attempt Two
"Wanna... Coffee... Uh... Gotta Go"
Kurt was studying. Again (I don't get it, he would still ace his classes –David) and Wes was staring at him like he was a piece of meat. A piece of sexy meat in skin- tight jeans. Anyway, so Kurt was studying and Wes was being creeper, then suddenly! *gasp* Wes made a move! Sort of. Well, he sat next to Kurt. This was an improvement! Sort of. uikagfsfgjcvbSZUIXGcuig! (STOP FIGHTING OVER THE KEYBOARD YOU IDIOTS! –David)
David here! I have control now... MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Anyway. So my dear friend Wesy went to sit near Kurty and... Said... The following. A note to the readers (why are we documenting this anyway?) NEVER ASK OUT A GUY THIS WAY! It makes you look like a complete idiot! And that is a BAD THING!
Wes: Hey Kurt.
Kurt: (smiles) Hey yourself.
Wes: Sooooo...
Kurt: (looks at Wes) So?
Wes: I was thinking...
Warblers: (lean eagerly forward)
Kurt: Does it hurt much?
Wes: (shocked face)
Warblers: (laugh)
Kurt:... I was kidding.
Wes: (sighs) Oh yeah. I knew that... Totally.
Kurt: Right. So, what were you thinking?
Wes: (nervous) Uh...
Kurt: (slightly impatient, but hidden behind a mask that he's apparently perfected) Yes...?
Wes: Uh... Wanna... Coffee... Uh... Gotta go! (runs out of the room like an idiot)
Kurt: (to nobody) What was that?
Warblers: (knowing looks)
(Let's not use this format next time. We should give more description on how much of an idiot Wes is. –Jeff)
(Agreed. –Nick)
(All of you shut up. –Thad)
(You shut up! –Jeff)
(... Okay, I'm the only one allowed to use the keyboard from now on. –David)
::ASDGH;GIOASDheilghleigheihgiehghaha hhahahahahahahah AWEIOgheoIGHGH
(MINE! –David)
Attempt Three
"Passing Notes"
Note: We actually found this in Wes's English book. Lucky we stole that for our own homework, or else we'd never have found this attempt, and the documentary of Wert would have been incomplete and nobody except Wert themselves would know! –Nick and Jeff
Wes is underlined, and Kurt is italics.
Hey
Hello
You look bored...?
I hate this teacher
She's not THAT bad!
I guess... But she gives McKinley a run for their money when it comes to boring classes
Ouch
It's true
So, I was wondering...
Again?
Hey! Anyway, I was wondering if I could get some of your help with my maths homework? You seem to understand it? Please?
Of course! Wanna come to my room after Warblers?
Sure...
Cool, cause David's going to be there too, and I think Jeff and Nick are going to stop by.
... Oh. cool. See you there.
(Oh my god! I still can't believe we helped ruin a Wert attempt! –Jeff (also Nick!)
(I feel awful . -David )