Hey! I am updating so that I know you guys will get something because I"m gonna be more busy for just a couple weeks. I'll try to still update. I dont own harry potter.
Chapter Eight
The halls grew steadily drearier as this unaccustomed group progressed. The airiness of the large hall and charmed ceiling gave way to a series of unassuming corridors, the likes of which where found throughout the castle school. The further on in their dungeon-ward trek they went, the lower the halls got, both in lighting and in elevation.
Severus was caught between his loathing for his current, unwitting companions and his fear of not making it to potions at all. He knew it was a distinct possibility that Black would kick the ever living shit out of him while Potter and Pettigrew laughed, but the Slytherins would for sure.
Severus never flinched from a beating, no matter who from or what for. He'd taken enough in his years, both at home and at school, to know that they were far from his biggest problem. He knew he was most likely to be beaten later anyway.
That was the real reason he didn't want to get harmed by a Slytherin. When the Dark Lord saw him bruised he was always furious. Snape, his spy inside Dumbledore's camp, was too weak to keep other students, his unworthy peers, at bay. It was a disgrace to have his mark on such a wretch.
It had meant a long beaten and many Cruciatus curses later he had been considered a learned disciple who wouldn't allow fellow snakes to beat him. He was their cause. He needed to show them that he was not just some lackey.
Voldemort wanted perfection. He expected the best of everyone as long as it was for his own dastardly ends. Severus had realized why he had signed on with him after a long fight with the marauders. Black had something long the lines of, "You are to nasty to be loved." Severus had hid it well, but that had been nearly exactly what his dad had said before the first, and almost every other time, he beat him and it had shaken him to the core. He felt such pain that he hadn't gone to dinner that night, just straight to his normal post by the lake. The sun that night had seem exorbitantly red.
And now as he followed the Potter and Black posse he realized that they all were the same. They all hated for no reason. He couldn't stand it. On both sides of the war were innocent people whose views were perfectly neutral and yet were killed for a pointless cause. That was why he fought. He didn't fight for Black or Potter. He didn't fight for Dumbledore. He fought for the people like him everywhere who were hunted and hated for nothing. Nothing, he wasn't just hated for nothing. He didn't deserve that much respect. He was nothing. If he even qualified as that.
Sirius got an all to recognizable tingling up his spine. He felt tailed. Generations of inbreeding had given him the tell tale pureblood enemy detector. He had had to perfect his at a young age because enemies lurked behind even the most familiar of faces. Instead of turning and looking, which would give the pursuers a chance to slip, he just stopped walking and spun, pulling a wand and was prepared to attack before he had fully turned. The onlookers were shocked and had no idea what had taken place. It soon became apparent to all when the other marauders turned in a similar fashion. Remus was so edgy that he had turned almost faster than Sirius, and had assessed the situation well before Peter had his wand out.
Remus knew it was Snape who was following them at the same time as Sirius. He had stepped, or leapt, in front of Sirius' wand before he sent a curse, stopping that plan dead in its tracks. Sirius was frustrated to the point of going beyond a prank. Whatever spell he was going to send wouldn't have been to anyone but him. It would've been especially disliked by the Slytherin standing at the other end of the wand.
"Siri, what has made you so mad all of a sudden?" If Remus treated them as adults they snapped, so he disciplined like a kindergarten teacher would an uncouth student. He stood so that Sirius couldn't see Snape. He looked right into Sirius' eyes, willing them to calm down and discus this like they usually would. Remus had some notion of why poor Severus Snape was following them, and had suspected for a while. His werewolf hearing had detected the sound of the same feet since the hall but he didn't mention it just in case it might hint at Remus' little problem that he was trying so hard to ignore.
With Remus placed as he was Severus could see Remus' hands sign to him to leave. Severus didn't know any other way to potions. In fact Remus didn't either. Remus slowly turned Sirius with both hands on his shoulders. They, all of them here, were fucked up in their own special way. It was like a bowl of nuts in this hallway and they were each an exotic and unheard of type from far away countries. They were all freaks, abnormal nuts which had nothing better to do than fight, and Remus? Moony could smell the fear on Snape. Snape would lose that fight.
While Sirius was being pacified Snape snuck passed Remus. The others didn't notice, having not known what upset Siri in the first place. This wasn't a lucky break though. So Severus was realizing.
When Remus had mentioned all the aid he gave, Severus had scoffed. Any Slytherin would at a member of the enemy party. And yet here was Remus protecting him from his own. Snape power walked to class, taking deep breaths to ensure that he made it that far. He felt reminiscent of Lily in the beginning. She defended him against her sister Petunia. But recently she had been distant, cold.
Cold was better than his father. One night, Severus had come home late and his father had been furious. When asked where he was Severus said he was with Lily. His father had been soothed by this slightly. He thought it meant his son wasn't queer. Younger Severus had slipped though and mentioned the M word.
That shabby living room had never seemed more dark. It was like hell. The red and green wool rug had seemed like the worst sight in the world, yet he stared at it because it was better than looking up and watching the relentless belt smacking any part of the fresh flesh.
His skin stung just thinking of it. He hadn't cried then and he wouldn't cry now. The memory of that night was far more vivid than last night in Snape's mind, but he refused to become a blubbering mess as Remus had been. Life sucks. Its hard. If it wasn't it would be called a slut instead of a bitch.
The classroom was almost bright. The light burned his eyes, or that was what he was telling himself caused the pain behind his eyes. He lied to Voldemort and took orders directly from the bat-shit crazy Dumbledore, he was a good liar. He was so good he could convince himself of almost anything. The class was empty when he got there first but was rapidly filling. It was when he looked at the board and noted the comment in chicken scratch from Horace that it made sense that Slytherins and Gryffindors were mixing. The board read:
I expect all of the students expecting to pass this class to sit with their assigned partners from yesterday. That does not excuse those of you who expect to fail. All who are not in seats next to their partner will spend the rest of the year as Mr. Filch's personal assistant. Poor Mr. Filch has been saying that the windows needed to be washed inside and out. Just that could take 24 hours, and Filch doesn't like to grant breaks for rule breakers. The choice is yours.
Snape didn't worry about Lupin as a potions partner. He was competent, That was the most Severus was willing to let himself believe. He was muddling all other thoughts on purpose because it would be easier to fool the Dark Lord if he didn't know himself, then there's nothing to hide. He just worried about Black's reaction. Most likely he would take offence to the fact that his precious bookworm didn't mind the slimy dungeon bat as much as he should.
Hate was a delicate thing for Severus Snape. There was so much room betwixt his feelings for Voldemort, at the most hated, and his father, who deserves all the hate he could muster, that these petty, school boyish tiffs meant nothing to him. He didn't hate the Black boy any more than he hated Lucius. They where mean and cruel, but when one has a limited amount of hate you have to pick the battle carefully. He bore no love for any of his peers, but he wished no good for them either.
There was a subtle but undeniable increase in noise coming from the hall. The noise was focused on mostly gasps. When Severus turned to the door, there stood a calm group of Gryffindors. He couldn't tell at first what had caused the uproar, but on further inspection there was a touch of blood on Lupin's' shirt collar and Black's knuckles were pretty bloody.
Remus looked back at his friends as he walked over to Snape. He was actually relieved that he had an excuse to not sit by Siri. As much as he loved the boy, he couldn't stand his temper. He was almost malicious. He settled into his chair and decided to see if Snape would talk today.
"Hey, Snape." He smiled a nearly genuine smile. "This should be interesting." He was really trying. If he could get Snape to accept him he could help him s much in this. It could be so great for him as a person.
"Hey Lupin, did you have a pleasant night?" He meant it to be subtly digging. Lupin was one of the brightest in their year and would catch on, because even Pettigrew could catch that one. Snape's eyes light up. This was the closest he had come to real conversation in a while. He always discussed strategy, but this angry conversation was a pleasant change, which illustrates how hard up he was. He never formed proper social skills and so he had limited experience with these matters. He was usually about to be hit by now. Or had been hit.
He was counting on the fact that Lupin wouldn't hit him, but he wasn't completely confident when he used the appearance of Black and Lupin together. They were both significantly different from the way he had left them for him to not be sure what had happened.
Just as Remus was going to respond about how immature he is….Slughorn burst into the class room and the room fell silent, waiting for a change.
Sorry. I was going to make this one go all the way through the class. I fell asleep instead. I hope you enjoy. Id love a review. I love the reviews I got. I know the story said it was complete. It wasnt. I completed the wrong one. Sorry.