Chapter Three: Conditional Critical
Walt watches in the ambulance as the team pokes and prods Jesse, tries to stabilize his frame and keep his spinal cord in a straight line, and he doesn't have time or ability to think. He wants to move closer to the younger man but cannot; there is a barrier of paramedics between the two and it seems like it's a huge rift, one he can't cross and he resents every single one of them because while he acknowledges their necessity in saving his young partner's life, he wishes it could just be him, wishes all of these people didn't have their hands all over him like he's just another patient – which to them, Walt knows, he is.
If Walt didn't know better, he would think that Jesse was dead – his eyelids are shut and he looks totally unresponsive as he is examined and eventually, when the ambulance pulls up in front of the hospital, carried down a ramp and into the hospital.
Jesse is wheeled into another room, one where Walt cannot follow. A paramedic tells him he can see him as soon as he's stabilized, but they don't know when that will be (they don't say it, but they don't even know if that will be.)
Walt's left simply waiting and shuffling back and forth, wishing he had any idea what to do; his hands can't find something useful to hold on to so they fiddle with the buttons on his red and gray flannel shirt, pulling the little black button out of the hole and then forcing it back in again, finally tearing one off from the constant repetition. He wishes he had a guidebook for this sort of thing: can he even visit Jesse? What's the protocol?
He pulls out his cell phone and dismisses three calls from Skyler before switching to his other phone and dialing Saul's number, which is listed in the phone as "Domino's".
"You've reached the office of Saul Goodman. How may I direct your call?" chirps an enthusiastic female voice.
"This is Walter White. I need to talk to Saul right now."
"One moment, Mr. White." There's a moment of on-hold music – Walt recognizes it as "Take On Me" by A-Ha – and then a click.
"Hey, Walter."
"I need your help, Saul. Does Jesse have anything filed with you… like a living will?"
"I believe so. Why do you ask? You planning on taking him out? Because I have to say, I disagree and you really ought to think about this rationally…"
Walt cuts him off: "He's been hit by a car."
"Well, all right, in THAT case… let me check."
Walt is put back on hold, and by this time the music has changed to "TiK ToK" by Ke$ha. Walt is surely tempted to hang up as he hears phrasing that perhaps Jesse could explain to him if he really wanted to know (he doesn't), but mercifully he is connected again.
"I'll be right over."
Skyler dials the hospitals first, when she hears no word from Walt for two hours since she last called. She wonders if she'd even get an answer that way, if the worst had happened, or if she would just not hear from him one day and he would be forever "missing".
When she calls the third hospital in the phone book, the receptionist replies, after listening to a description of what Walt looks like, "I believe he's here, ma'am. But not as a patient. I think I saw him checking somebody in."
"Checking someone in? Who?"
"I don't know, ma'am. Someone for the ER."
"The ER?"
"The ER, yeah – hey, I dunno if I'm allowed to have told you that." Deciding she wasn't going to get anything more from the receptionist, Skyler hangs up and walks out the door, pulling it closed and glowering at no one in particular. Who was Walt checking into the hospital? Was it even him that dippy receptionist saw? And if it was, do I even care?
She locks the door with a frenzied, furious motion – surprised the key doesn't break off inside – and walks over to her car, opening it and climbing inside. Tracking down Walt again. Great.
When she arrives at the hospital and finds a parking space, she slams the door and marches into the ER. Time to get to the bottom of this – so tired of always getting to the bottom of this. Why couldn't the next surprise up Walt's sleeve be bouquet of roses instead of terminal diagnoses and secret meth labs?
She wonders how in the world she'll find him or if he's even still here or if he just dropped somebody off and then went home.
As she heads towards the desk, she finds herself staring at the unmistakable form of Saul Goodman, whose eyes are filled with annoyance at the fact that he has encountered her as well.
"He didn't say you were coming!" he exclaims.
"He didn't tell me he was coming," Skyler replies shortly. "Why is Walt in the hospital?"
"I…"
"Saul."
"I can't tell you. Attorney-client privilege." Skyler stops asking and simply follows Saul into the waiting room. As she sees Walt, she rushes forward, not sure whether she wants to hug him or slap him across the face.
"What happened?" she asks, and Walt looks up and meets the eyes of Saul, who shrugs. He'll have to tell her something. But what? "Tell me the truth, Walt." She forces him to meet her eyes. "I need to know." Walt takes a deep breath; he can tell the truth now, can't he? He tries to cycle through the events to find if there is anything incriminating within it. Not finding anything, he takes another breath.
"Jesse Pinkman… Do you remember Jesse Pinkman?"
"Yes," Skyler replies quickly, the look in her eyes demanding that Walt get on with it.
"He was hit by a car," Walt says simply. "He's in critical condition." Skyler's look turns from aggrieved to horrified.
"Oh, God, Walt." It's in this moment that Skyler realizes that the relationship between Walt and Jesse goes far deeper than she ever suspected, because behind Walt's eyes, hidden ever so slightly and in danger of seeping out ever so slowly, was pure emotion, the reality that Walt was barely holding it together.
She doesn't know how to feel about that. Her Walt is hurting and she doesn't know what to do.
She reaches out and grabs his hand in hers, holds it tight.
"He's going to be okay, Walt," she tells him firmly, "We're going to make sure."