I'm gonna apologize now for any and every mistake I know is in here, because it's 3 am and I haven't read this all the way through in one sitting, so I know it's gonna be shit. But really I just want it out there so I can keep going. Hope it's still readable. We'll see
And a second note, be warned that this is kind of an intense chapter at some points – the main points really – so if you're really squeamish or whatever, just… I don't know, watch out cause maybe you won't like it. A lot of hurt!scared!nervous!Sam and protective!big brother!comforting!Dean in a medical procedure.
Anyway, read it and tell me what you thought! Love
Xx
Things settled as Sam and Dean watched the sun disappear behind the horizon. They sat out there, drawing comfort and safety and calm from each other until the sky turned black and the stars came out.
That's when they heard footsteps approaching their little hide out in the run down Fiero, snapping both of them from their thoughts as they jerked their heads around in search for the noise.
"Boys." A voice called from the darkness: Meyer. He came around into view a moment later and approached the car, kneeling down to peer through the open space where the passenger window would've been. Both boys visibly relaxed the moment they realized there was no potential threat, but went back on defense a moment later as neither was sure where they stood with the man yet.
"Hey Meyer." Sam greeted politely, quietly.
Meyer nodded to him and timidly rested his elbows on the frame of the window, leaning closer, "Just came to make sure you were alright." The doctor offered looking back and forth between the brothers. They were both a little startled at the prospect.
"Uh, yeah. Yeah we're alright." Dean nodded, mildly skeptical.
"Alright good." Meyer nodded and turned to Sam, "Like your…like Dean said," He fumbled, obviously avoiding the word 'brother', "You don't need any added stress Sam, so just relax. Try not to worry about this whole thing, Bobby will come around soon enough." The doctor nodded confidently, patting Sam on the shoulder.
Sam looked up at Meyer with nothing short of shock clear on his face, "So…you're, okay with this?" He asked, his voice rising to make clear his suspicion and disbelief.
"Well, I mean, I'm not gonna tell you I completely support this…relationship, but I won't condemn it either. I know you boys, and I know you have your heads on straight, so, if this is…what you need right now, who am I to tell you it's wrong?" The doctor said, shrugging nonchalantly.
Dean shook his head to clear it, "If you're so calm about all this, why'd you look like you were about to turn tail and run in there?" He asked jerking his chin toward the house.
Meyer looked back to see where Dean had indicated, "Right well, Bobby…he uh, intimidates me. I was afraid I'd have to step between him and you boys if things took a turn for the south." He grimaced, tilting his head as he shrugged again.
Dean snorted at the admission and shook his head, "I can't believe you were ever a hunter." He mumbled ducking his head.
"A hunter?" Meyer asked, taking his turn to chuckle lightly, "Oh no, not me. I was, am, a doctor for hunters. And I do my fair amount of research, search out cases for other hunters to take care of. But, I've never done it myself."
"Oh," Dean nodded considering that, "Explains a lot."
Sam hit him in the arm, sniggering his disapproval as he shook his head at his brother. Meyer just huffed another laugh and shrugged as he stood up.
"Well then, I'll leave you two be. I'm off to bed, don't forget we have a check up in a few days." He reminded, patting the metal frame of the car as he took a few steps away.
"Yeah I remember." Sam said.
"Good, now don't stay out here too long. It's not so warm out anymore." He pointed at the boys, making sure he was heard.
Dean scoffed and shook his head again, "Good night doc."
"Night boys." And with that, Meyer disappeared back into the dark house, leaving the boys to ponder over the strange encounter with the doctor in silence.
"I…kind of can't believe he was so cool about it." Sam mumbled looking into his lap with wonder in his eyes.
"Yeah, seriously. That was weird." Dean returned looking up at the scattered sparkling lights in the sky.
"But good. I'm glad at least one of them's with us. Maybe it'll help make Bobby okay again." Sam suggested, "I don't want this to ruin anything, he's been too good to us for too long. Like family, I don't wanna lose that."
"I know Sammy." Dean agreed, considering a moment, "But I don't think it will, like you said he's been close to us for too long. He'll be okay, even if it takes a little time, eventually it'll all work out." Dean reassured, grabbing Sam's shoulder and squeezing, kneading the muscles gently.
Sam nodded his hopeful settlement, "Yeah, alright."
The boys stayed out for another hour before turning into bed - the same bed - and snuggling under the covers to catch a full night's of restful sleep for the first time in over a month.
The next morning was, the least to say, awkward. Not at all surprisingly, but nevertheless, unbearably uncomfortable.
Bobby was in the kitchen cooking, Meyer was setting the table and Sam and Dean were waiting for their breakfast, everyone playing the same roles they'd been playing since the routine had ever been set in Bobby's house – but everything had changed so drastically it was hard to believe the setting had ever felt normal.
"So, how'd you boys sleep?" Meyer asked offhandedly as he poured himself a glass of juice after everyone had taken their seats. The question was nothing to get caught on, but Bobby froze in his place as the incorporated implications obviously ran through his mind.
Dean flicked his eyes over to their old friend, his gaze immediately heating with anger as he took in Bobby's reaction, pausing before his answer.
"Perfect." Dean said finally directing his stare back at Meyer, choosing to take the high road and not retort with any of the smart-ass remarks his instincts begged him to use.
It was tense and silent for too long before Dean spoke up again.
"Where's the paper?" The older Winchester bit out as he looked up at Bobby.
Bobby's gaze glanced off Dean a few times before landing solidly on him and flickering to the front door, "Haven't brought it in yet." He answered just as gruffly.
Dean nodded and dropped his fork, "Thanks for breakfast," He managed as calmly as he could before standing, "I'm gonna go see what it's got to offer, huh." He said directing his words only at his brother as he looked down at Sam, his expression immediately softening as he gripped his shoulder and squeezed, walking out a second later.
Bobby kept eating, trying hard to keep any trace of a grimace off his face but failing pretty miserably as he pointedly ignored the exchange between the boys. Meyer, on the other hand, was looking at Sam curiously after having watched Dean leave.
"What's he talking about, never once seen him with the paper." The doctor asked and Sam mentally sighed in relief as he realized that curious look hadn't been leading up to some question about his and Dean's relationship. With the mouth on that man, no one could ever be sure.
"He's looking for a job." Sam answered quietly, returning his attention to his breakfast.
That got Bobby's attention, "What's he lookin' for a job for? I told you boys you ain't going anywhere, ya don't need a job to go off and buy your own place. You're too young, it's unnecessary, and it's a waist of damn money." Bobby ground out, giving Sam a sharp glare.
Sam shrunk minutely under the intensity of that stare and the loud words but didn't look away from their old friend, "I know that Bobby. But we need money regardless. We can't live off of you forever, and I know your 'income' isn't gonna support four people, when the time comes." Sam explained quietly, still mildly uncomfortable ever talking about the babies with anyone but Dean.
Bobby's face softened as he backed down; obviously on-edge and worn-out, his tempers were high, and Sam couldn't really blame him for jumping to conclusions.
"Oh, alright then." Bobby relented, "Just, make sure he don't overwork himself. Knowing that kid, he'll run himself into the ground making sure you boys are taken care of…just needs to know I'm here too. He don't gotta handle it all on his own." He muttered softly, resuming his attention to his food.
"I know Bobby." Sam returned whole-heartedly, tentatively placing a hand on Bobby's shoulder, "And we'd never be able to thank you enough for that. For everything." Sam nodded, his face slipping into an emotionless mask as he stood and pat his friends shoulder before slipping off.
"Breakfast was great. Thanks guys." Sam said grabbing his plate and Dean's from the table and heading for the sink to clean up.
"Sam you don't have to do that," Meyer called loudly, breaking the quiet sensitivity of the moment, "I'll take care of it when I'm done."
"Stop doc, I can do it. You're doing too much already." Sam replied, shoving a few dishes in the dishwasher, "It's not like I'm some invalid anyway, its dishes for Christ's sake." He finished irritably but under his breath, tired of being coddled and fawned over. He was fine and perfectly capable of everything he'd been able to do before-
Sam's thoughts were blatantly interrupted as a sharp, tugging pain sliced through his lower abdomen, freezing him to the spot as he sucked in a surprised breath. Suddenly he doubled over, clutching his stomach and the counter for support as the wind was knocked out of him and the pain intensified.
One half-second later, it was gone. Sam took a deep breath and slowly straightened up, apprehensive and cautious of his movements, wondering if whatever happened had been some fluke or if something was really wrong and another pain was on its way.
He stayed there, unmoving and silent for at least a few minutes, halfway wondering if he'd just imagined the pain all together, as now he felt completely fine.
Sam took another breath and rubbed his belly, looking down at the small, but now clearly visible bump, praying whatever had just happened hadn't meant anything serious. He returned to the dishes, choosing for the moment to forgo telling anyone and worrying them with something so minor. Because it had been nothing, it had to have been nothing.
By the end of the day, Dean had found three ads in the paper for jobs that he'd be qualified for and Sam had all but forgotten his incident in the kitchen – Bobby hadn't caused them any more trouble throughout the day and Meyer had still been nothing but supportive, so all in all both boys were pretty damn happy, finding little to complain about on the quiet evening.
Night was storming in fast as they settled in on the couch, watching TV in the living room. Bobby and Meyer had departed with their 'goodnight's and headed up to their rooms, leaving the boys to themselves for the remainder of the night.
"So what were the ads for?" Sam asked as a commercial came on, glad to finally have a chance to talk to his brother without any ears or eyes on them, "Did you get to set up any interviews?"
It took Dean a second to understand what Sam was talking after he ripped his focus away from the TV, but soon he put it together and answered, "Oh right. Um, yeah, one ad was for a construction gig, which is the one I want and most likely the one that pays best. Another was for a hardware store, which wouldn't be too bad either, and another… for a uh, an ice cream shop in the mall." Dean admitted reluctantly, though offhandedly, obviously trying to make it sound like the prospect of working in an ice cream, at the mall, was not at all threatening for his manhood or pride. And Sam couldn't be blamed for the laugh that bubbled out at the mental picture that provided.
"Yeah, yeah laugh it up geek boy. You'll be jealous when you see me workin' my pink visor and apron, scoopin' out cones for all the girls. I'll get a fan base started if I work there, just wait." Dean assured, making Sam laugh harder.
"Oh yeah, 'Dean the mean, ice cream machine'." Sam laughed shaking his head, "You'll be bringing in all the ladies with that one." He kept teasing.
Dean hit him in the arm but couldn't help laughing with him: the idea of him in an ice cream shop or at the mall was kind of ridiculous.
"I'm not working there man, bet the pays shit anyway. I'm gonna get that construction gig." Dean said determinedly.
"I don't know, that pink apron sounded pretty appealing to me." Sam said hiding his smile, Dean snorted and shook his head, nudging him again.
"So did you get an interview for it?" Dean turned a mock glare toward him, "I meant the construction thing," Sam clarified with a chuckle.
Dean nodded smiling back, "Right," He drawled, "No not yet, but I got one for the hardware store. Called all three places today and faxed or emailed over my resume, the store got back but I'm still waiting on the others. Hopefully tomorrow I'll hear. The interview for the store's this Tuesday though."
"Sounds good." Sam consented patting Dean's thigh, "Thanks man, for doing this. I know all this shits kinda, flipped our whole world upside down but you've been…really good about everything. Making the whole transition a lot smoother for all of us, and I just…I need you know it really means a lot. So thank you." Sam said, his voice dropping with his eyes as he finished, knowing full well the chances of Dean throwing the gratitude back in his face rather than appreciating it were very high.
But Dean just gave him a crooked smile and tilted his chin up with the tip of his finger, quickly descending to peck him on the lips, slow and soft. "It's not a problem lil' bro. I'm as much a part of this as you are, so whatever I do to help out is just me doing my job. So stop thanking me." He whispered, bumping his forehead with Sam's, his smile still in place. Sam huffed a laugh and backed away shaking his head.
"Whatever." He mumbled around a small smile as he settled against the couch again, turning back to the show. Dean maneuvered his arm around Sam and relaxed as well, pulling his brother in against his side, wrapping his other arm around his middle and resting against the top his head.
"Dean," Sam protesting trying to sit up, "What about Bobby?" He asked quietly, urgency in his eyes.
Dean just shrugged and pulled him back down, "I've held you like this since you were a baby kid, just chill."
Sam let his brother bring him back down before a small smile tugged on his lips, thinking on those words and all the times he could remember that made them true.
The next few hours flew by. The boys nodded off on the couch a few times before a surprisingly calm Bobby, considering their entwined position, roused them from the couch and shooed them off to bed. The boys were too tired to be embarrassed that their friend had found them asleep in each others arms, so they simply said their goodnights one last time and went up to bed, again choosing to share the same one, and soon after the house was back asleep.
It was hours later that the quiet night took an abrupt turn and the calm, sleeping members of the house were roused in a panic.
Sam awoke in bed panting, not quite understanding in his sleep-hazed mind why he was awake or out of breath before a quick shock of pain dragged low through his belly, knocking the air right out of his lungs in a whooshing gush. Things started coming together pretty quickly after that, and oh God did this feel familiar.
Dean lurched up in bed at the sound of his brother gasping for breath, turning toward Sam in the same second to hover over him.
And damn had this already happened too many times, he was tired of waking up to a distressed, pained brother. It shredded his nerves to the core every time.
"Sammy?" Dean asked, his voice sleep-rough and deep, but pressing and panicked nonetheless.
"Ow, ow, fuck Dean." He moaned clutching low on his stomach, "Shit somin's wrong." Sam slurred turning bleary eyes to his brother.
"Meyer!" Dean shouted, remembering all too well the last time this had happened. They'd lost a baby, and he really couldn't even begin to think about this being a repeat of that night. He wouldn't bear it.
"It's alright Sammy, just keep breathin'." Dean calmed running clammy hands through Sam's hair, brushing it from his eyes, trying to soothe him. Meyer came rushing into the room at that moment.
"What's happening?" Meyer asked shortly, coming over to Sam's side of the bed.
"Shit I don't know, he said something's wrong." Dean offered seeing Sam wasn't able to speak yet. Bobby came in next and flipped on the lights, blazing everyone's eyes with the bright light. Bobby, Meyer and Dean shielded themselves for the one second it took to adjust their eyes before moving back into action.
Sam groaned lowly and squeezed his eyes tighter, still cradling his stomach.
"Where's it hurt Sam?" Meyer asked pulling up a stool and the ultrasound next to the bed, Dean felt the scene was far too familiar for his comfort.
Sam looked at his hands and rubbed as an indication, his panting breaths making it difficult to create full sentences.
Meyer nodded, pulling up his shirt up and applying the cold gel swiftly and professionally. When Sam's hands were in the way, Dean gently took him by the wrists and pulled them away, quietly keeping his steady stream of reassurances flowing into Sam's ear.
The doctor quickly nodded to Dean in thanks and began twirling around the machine searching for the right picture on screen. He finally spotted the two peanuts on the machine and slowed his search, looking for anything out of place.
Dean kept his gaze flicking steadily back and forth between his brother and the machine, even though he saw nothing but black and gray blobs he couldn't help but continue searching for anything that might hint as to what was wrong with Sam.
"Just keep breathing Sammy, you're doing so good." Dean whispered, running his free hand down Sam's arm, letting his other hand be strangled in Sam's ironclad grip.
"I-I don't see anything that's wrong." Meyer disclosed slowly, eyes still on the screen, "But this picture…it's not very clear. I could be missing something." He shook his head lifting the wand from Sam's stomach and wiping off the gel.
"Well obviously something's wrong," Dean pointed out, struggling to keep his voice calm and even, "What are you gonna do?"
Sam's breath hitched and his free hand went back down to his belly, drawing all their attention again.
"Well I need to know what's happening first before I can fix it, or determine if it's even threatening to any of them. This could be like the episodes in the beginning, his body adjusting or something, but I need a better picture." Meyer explained as he put the machine away and left the room.
Dean rubbed his forehead feeling the onsets of one serious migraine coming on. Too much stress and adrenaline, not enough sleep, not enough time to just be calm. They really couldn't catch a break.
"Hey, boy, it'll be alright." Bobby said, taking a few steps further into the room as he noticed Dean rubbing roughly at his temple. Dean whipped his head up; having forgotten Bobby had been there with him until now.
"Oh," Dean started, calming again in the same second, "Yeah…yeah I know." He agreed half-heartedly, "Shh Sammy, it's okay. Just hang in there a little longer," Deam encouraged noticing the small beads of sweat forming on Sam's skin, "Meyer's gonna figure out what's wrong. Don't worry little bro." Dean said, focusing on his brother again, his hand running up and down Sam's arm and chest and through his hair, providing as much comfort as he could.
"Dean," Sam grunted out before whimpering lowly, the sound sliced right through Dean's heart, "I don't wanna lose another b-baby." He whispered desperately, still panting harshly for air, "I can't." Sam shook his head, tossing back and forth on the pillow, rejecting the thought with his every fiber.
"Hey it's okay Sam, calm down." Dean demanded softly, grabbing Sam's face to make him look into his eye, "We're not losing any more of our family, I promised you that remember?" Sam nodded shakily, small tears dancing around the rims of his eyes, "Plus there's no blood this time, right?" Dean comforted in a whisper, rubbing the back of Sam's thigh, completely forgetting about their audience, "It can't be the same. We're gonna figure this out, okay? Just hang on a little longer Sammy. Everything's gonna be alright."
"Okay." Sam breathed, visibly relaxing, "Okay."
Just then Meyer raced in, stopping himself with his hand clutched on the doorframe.
"We need to get Sam down into the basement, it's not ideal but it's where all the equipment is. I have everything set up now." The doctor announced, his breathing labored as he'd evidently been running in his haste to get things ready.
Dean nodded curtly to the man in his assent. "I'll bring him down." Bobby and Meyer backed out of the room, giving Dean space to maneuver his brother out. Dean climbed off the bed and came around to Sam's side, bending over to get his brother's drifting attention again.
Sam face was scrunched loosely in pain, but it was obviously becoming manageable as he concentrated solely on working through it and relaxing. Dean hated to break that focus as he knew he'd probably cause him more pain again.
"Sammy." Dean whispered and Sam's eyes shot open, "I'm sorry, but we gotta move you downstairs." Sam swallowed thickly before he sucked in a breath and nodded.
"Okay, help me up." He agreed, holding out his hands.
"No Sammy I'm gonna carry you, the less you move the better before we know what's going on." Dean said, his voice hard and leaving little room for discussion. Sam relented slowly and reluctantly, but didn't voice his disapproval as he knew his brother was right.
Dean bent down low to scoop up his brother, sliding his arms gently under Sam's back and knees, trying to lift him as smoothly as possibly, but not surprisingly finding it difficult as Sam was already his height and almost his weight.
Moving him down the flights of stairs was serious work, especially as he was trying to be gentle about it, but as soon Sam was in the panic room, surrounding by medical equipment that could potentially save his or their babies lives, he knew there would never be anything he wouldn't do to keep his family safe.
Dean slowly lowered Sam onto the single cot in the room, propping him up on the extra pillows Meyer had brought and sat down in the chair that had been placed for him besides Sam's head.
Meyer was sitting on a rotating stool on the other side of the bed, still preparing his equipment for whatever tests he was planning on running to figure out what was wrong.
"Alright Sam, how's the pain right now, scale of one to ten." Meyer asked, still focused on working the big machine to his right, fiddling with tubes and wires but attentive to Sam nonetheless.
"Four or five, its manageable but something's definitely wrong." Sam answered as evenly as he could, still holding his stomach protectively.
Meyer nodded thoughtfully, done with preparing whatever machine he was working with, "Was it higher before, or has it been that level this whole time?"
"No, it was a six or seven before." Sam revealed sighing heavily and breaking his pattern of harsh panting, "Please doc, give me something. What could be wrong? Are they gonna be okay?" Sam asked, trying hard to stay calm despite the shake in his voice and hands.
"I'm sure they will be Sam, but to figure out what's causing this, I need to see what's happening. Their heartbeats are regular though, everything with them seems alright so you can relax." Meyer took a breath to continue but stopped as his gaze moved over to Bobby who was lingering anxiously just outside the open panic room door. Sam's eyes followed along with Dean's, both wondering what the look was for.
But then Bobby nodded to Meyer and took a step away, preparing to leave, "You're gonna be just fine Sam." Bobby said, determination mixed with sadness shining in his eyes, "I'll be waiting right upstairs, I'll come back down when you're done, okay?" He said not waiting for an answer as he took another step away before closing the door, giving them privacy.
Sam's stare immediately whipped back over to Meyer, panic clear in his eyes, "Doc what're you gonna do? Why does he have to go?"
"Sam it's alright, calm down." Meyer consoled placing a hand softly on Sam's forearm, "Just offering you a little privacy is all. It's nothing bad alright."
"Privacy for what?" Sam asked, his voice having quieted as he relaxed a little, taking some comfort in Meyer's words.
"Would you like to keep Dean in the room too?" Meyer asked, his professionalism masking over his emotions, giving him the perfect poker face and giving nothing away. That scared the hell out of Sam; he suddenly had the sick feeling of being conspired against, even if his rational mind knew it wasn't true.
"Yes Meyer, now please just tell me what's going on? You're scaring me." Sam begged desperately, sweat dribbling down from his temples.
"It's okay Sam, I'm just gonna try and get a better look at what's going on, alright? It's nothing to get worked up over." Meyer enforced, "The procedure is quick, I promise. I'm going to take a small camera and take a look inside to see if I can't find something I missed from the ultrasound – something that may have happened when the stitches healed that I missed. From how you describe the pain it sounds like maybe that could be where it's coming from. We'll have to see alright?" Meyer explained as vaguely and comfortingly as he could, for both Sam and Dean's sakes.
"The stitches inside?" Sam asked, his brow turning upward in apprehension as he swallowed thickly.
"It's alright Sam, like I said nothing to get worked up over. It'll be over before you even realize it started." But at seeing Sam take no comfort from his supporting words, he continued with an explanation, "I'd give you something to help calm you down, but with this high-risk pregnancy, it could cause complications during the procedure. I need to know when and if something I'm doing causes you more pain than it should, alright? Because I've obviously never dealt with a situation like this before, I don't know how certain things will effect you or the babies, so I need you to be alert. You understand what I'm saying?" Meyer asked, ducking to make sure he was being seen and heard by his distraught patient.
Dean stepped in then, thankfully taking the reigns from the doctor who didn't know half as well as him how to maneuver through situations with Sam.
"Hey brother, you hearing the doc?" Dean asked, placing a hand on the side of Sam's neck to get him to look at him. Sam nodded quickly, realizing he should've answered a while ago and quickly becoming embarrassed as he schooled his features.
"Yeah I understand Meyer. You do whatever you need to make sure they're okay." Sam said, instantly complying once he waded through his shock to process what needed to be done.
Meyer nodded uneasily at the empty tone in Sam's voice but took the consent for what it was and prepared for the procedure.
"Okay Sam, I'm gonna give you a minute to get undressed and under the sheet. Then just lay on your side and face Dean. Knock whenever your ready, I'll be on the other side of the door." Meyer informed with a tight smile before leaving quickly and shutting the big metal door behind him.
"Alright Sammy," Dean said with a soft smile of his own as he stood above his brother, trying to keep his attitude light as he prepared his brother, "Lift your hips for me." He instructed, keeping his voice as calm and neutral as he could even as every instinct in him screamed to protect his brother from the doctor.
"No. Dean it basically doesn't hurt anymore, maybe this was just a one-time fluke kind of thing. Like the doc said nothing's wrong with the babies, so nothing's wrong right?" Sam tried to reason, grasping at straws trying to get out of this. Dean gave him a sympathetic look and crouched down to be level with his brother again.
"Look Sammy, I know you're still in pain. I can see it on your face no matter what you say, and we both know this isn't just some one-time thing. As for the babies, I'm really relieved they seem healthy, but that just means now I'm worried about you. We both know the track record for this whole…situation so far and it isn't good, which means were getting this checked out. Doesn't matter how much you plead or try and buckle me with those puppy dog eyes, I'm not putting your life in danger for anything." Dean said lightly, keeping his voice quiet and serene to balance out the heaviness of his words before he stood again. "So lift up," Dean said once more, patting the side of Sam's hip.
Sam's mask completely fell apart at that, realizing then that there was no way to get out of this. He shot Dean one last pleading look, letting every rampant emotion clashing within him show. And a lot of it was pure helpless, desperate, fear.
Dean couldn't stand to see Sam so petrified, and the amount of fear he saw quickly made him realize there were deeper meanings behind where it came from. He sighed and leaned over his brother one last time, "Don't start thinking like that Sammy," Dean reprimanded after connecting the dots, "This won't be anything like what that bastard did before okay? This is Meyer, we know him, we trust him, and he's here to help you. So just try to relax a little, everything's gonna be okay." He soothed, leaning down farther to kiss Sam softly, running his calloused fingers down his cheek and feeling him slowly loosen under his touch, "That's it," He smiled reassuringly, "Now for real, let me get these off. I can't stand seeing you in pain so please, let's get this done with so we can figure out how to fix whatever's wrong."
Sam slowly lifted his hips off the bed with a tight grimace, the movement obviously causing him discomfort, so Dean quickly tugged down the boxers and let Sam relax into the bed again, working the sheet out from under him and tossing over his lax form.
"Thank you," Dean whispered kneeling down to press his lips to Sam's once more, letting his tongue lightly trace the bottom edge before pulling away, "Okay now turn on your side." He said trying to ignore the blatant fear on his little brother's face, knowing the only way he'd get him through this was if he stayed calm and confident.
Dean helped Sam roll over, the jostling and twisting doing nothing for whatever was happening in Sam's stomach as he groaned and hissed through the rougher movements.
"Okay, hang on Sammy. I'm gonna get Meyer."
Dean knocked on the heavy door a few times before returning to Sam's side and waiting for the doctor to come in and get settled. Sam flinched at the sound of the door slamming shut again as the doctor entered and moved around to sit at Sam's back, but visibly relaxed again when Dean slid his palm over Sam's neck and squeezed his shoulder.
"Alright Sam, you all set?" Meyer asked as he situated himself and his equipment.
Sam breathed out a shaky sigh before looking up to Dean; his brother took his hand and smiled as he nodded in encouragement.
"Yeah doc, we're ready." Dean answered for him before climbing out his chair to kneel at Sam's head, knowing he didn't want to be propped up enough to see whatever Meyer was about to do and wanting to be directly in Sam's line of sight.
Meyer lifted the sheet on his side and threw it over his hip making Sam shiver. Whether from the cool exposure or the fearful anticipation of what was about to happen Dean wasn't sure, but he didn't like it all the same.
"It's alright Sammy, you're okay." Dean consoled in barely a whisper, leaning his chin on the mattress to press his forehead to Sam's feeling his body shake under his touch.
"Alright Sam, we're gonna get started now. Just going to feel my hands, okay? Nothing to be nervous about." Meyer explicated, being as tender as he could to try and alleviate Sam's fear.
Dean felt Sam flinch against him and snatch up one of his hands, tugging himself closer to his brother on instinct. "It's okay Sammy, just focus on me man." Dean said backing up to look in his brother's eye, reaching his free hand out to place securely on Sam's cheek and running his thumb reassuringly over the skin.
"Okay Sam, here we go. Just try and relax for me, alright? Keep breathing evenly and deeply." The doctor coached calmly. Dean stomach flipped in its own anxiety as his hand squeezed Sam's in what he hoped was positive encouragement, ignoring every voice that told him to save his brother from this turmoil and run from the room. He needed to be strong for Sam.
Sam kept his eyes intensely fixated on Dean's as did his best to comply, sucking in a few trembling breaths and forcing them out slowly, trying to unclench all his coiled muscles. Dean glanced up suddenly, feeling eyes on him. Meyer was peering over at him, trying to discern whether Sam was ready or not, so Dean nodded, giving the doc the go ahead. The doctor returned it and looked away, signaling that he was ready.
A second later Sam gasped in evident surprise and curled in on himself, his brow crumpling as he simultaneously pulled himself closer to Dean again. "Shh calm down Sammy, try and stay still." Dean hushed, smoothing his hand down Sam's face and neck, around to his back as he gently massaged the tensed muscles. "Come on brother, keep breathing, remember? It'll help you relax." He coaxed again, knowing how much harder he was making this on himself by resisting.
Sam gave an almost inaudible whimper as his eyes slammed shut and his teeth came down over his bottom lip, gnawing on the tender flesh until it was flushed red and swollen.
"Stop Sammy," Dean whispered, the back of his fingers moving to brush over Sam's lips, attempting to make him let go. "Come on man, you can do this, just take a deep breath and relax. The harder you fight this the worse you're going to make it, please Sammy." Dean begged, hating the sight of Sam in any level of discomfort or pain.
Finally Sam's eyes shot open again to look at Dean before he drew in a lungful of air and let it out in a huff, obviously trying to get his muscles to stop twitching and tensing as he followed his brother's advice. "That's it man, good job." Dean praised.
Sam's eyes were bloodshot and squinted as they bored into Dean's, pain and vulnerability all too visible in them for his brother's wellbeing. He spared a quick glance up to the doctor, wanting to know if he was almost done, but Meyer's eyes were riveted on the screen facing away from them, showing the doctor the picture from his camera. Dean didn't want to break his focus, so he kept his mouth shut and continued comforting Sam, clenching his jaw against the urge to scream at Meyer to hurry the fuck up.
"You're doing great Sammy, I'm so fuckin' proud of you man. Just a little bit longer, you're almost done." Dean said softly, continuing to run his knuckles over Sam's face and chest, wishing he could quell the trembling in his body.
Sam did his best to keep his sole attention on Dean and ignore what was happening to him, but whatever it was it was obviously hard for him to focus through because every second brought a new wave of pained expression onto his face. It was killing Dean to watch.
A few moments later Sam's eyes yanked open wide as he gasped in a strangled breath of air and moaned, clutching Dean's hand all the tighter.
"Okay Sam, try and relax," Meyer instructed once again, "Almost there."
Sam started panting groans and whimpers, doing everything he could not to jerk away from the doctor's ministrations. "Meyer what's happening?" Dean asked, fraught and panicked at the new level of his brother's discomfort.
"We've hit a tender spot, about at the stitches. Sorry Sam, hang on." Meyer said, still focused exclusively on the screen before him.
"Ow, god, fuck. It hurts." Sam keened breathlessly, his eyes shut tight as shudders bore through his bulky frame.
Dean's heart rate spiked, thundering relentlessly in his chest as he watched his brother succumb to his agony helplessly, restraining himself from knocking Meyer's lights out with every part of his being. "Sh, sh, shh it's okay Sammy, almost done. Just hang on." He chanted, grasping desperately at anything he could think of to take the pained grimace from his little brother's face.
Sam cried out, wrenching his head back as Meyer hit something that obviously was the problem that'd been causing him pain all along, "Yeah. That's it." The doctor announced, solidifying Dean's guess as to what'd happened.
"Stop. Doc you're hurting him." Dean demanded frantically, watching beads of sweat drip from his brother's worn face.
"It's okay Sam, we're done." Meyer stated, calming both boys down with his proclaimed finish. Dean sighed a huge breath of relief, more than glad this was about over as he leaned into Sam brushing his lips over his brother's sweaty cheek.
"You did so good Sammy, it's over. It's over," Dean exhaled, brushing away his brother's damp locks and leaning back, letting out one last huge sigh of reprieve.
"Oh thank god," Sam sighed under his breath as soon as Meyer was done retracting his equipment and he covered him back up.
"Yeah, seriously." Dean added in a whisper, hoping he never had to witness something like this ever again.
Meyer wrapped up his machine and turned it off, giving Sam some time to calm down before he explained whatever it was he'd found. Soon though, he moved around to the other side of the bed beside Dean.
"Okay Sam, good news is, I found the problem. There's a hole in the tissue where the other doctor had stitched you up, one of the stitches must've popped and I didn't catch it on the sonogram. It hasn't been causing you pain until now because the babies have been growing and most likely moving, even if you can't feel it yet, which has been irritating the unhealed tissue." Sam's eyes brightened with that piece of information, his babies were moving? "The bad news is I'm going to have to go in and stitch you up again, you'll be under anesthesia for the whole process of course, but nevertheless, I'm sure its not something you're looking forward to." Meyer explained sympathetically.
Dean's eyes roamed as he thought on that but soon he quickly nodded, looking at Sam to make sure he felt it was all right.
"Yeah doc, that's fine. If I'm out for it I don't really care what you do." Sam said nonchalantly, still reeling from the fact that their babies were moving, soon he'd be able to feel them himself. The idea definitely brightened his spirits.
"Alright good. It won't take long at all, ten, fifteen minutes tops. But Dean I would ask you to wait upstairs if that's alright, because since it's technically surgery, I'd have to get you sterile scrubs and everything…it's just not worth the hassle. That alright?" Meyer asked politely, making sure he at least gave the impression that the choice was up to him.
"Yeah Meyer it's fine. You'll be alright without me, huh Sammy?" Dean asked jokingly, somewhere in the recesses of his mind actually searching for a serious answer.
"I'll be fine." Sam said, shooting his brother a crooked grin, "And thanks Dean" He added more quietly, "For staying here with me and everything." He gratified softly, his eyes speaking the million words he couldn't in the presence of the doctor.
Dean smiled back, "What'd I tell you 'bout thanking me? I wouldn't leave my damsel in distress for anything, you know that." He teased again, keeping the mood light, as right now his nerves were shot and his body was still twitchy from the horrible few minutes that'd just passed. "I'll be here when you wake up." Dean said as a way of goodbye, glancing around quickly to see where the doctor was before he left. Meyer was now preparing what he needed for the operation and conveniently turned away from them, so Dean of course took the opportunity to place his mouth to Sam's one more time, his gratitude and relief and happiness that this was over and almost fixed all relayed through the simple touch.
"Countin' on it." Sam shot back as Dean stood, making his way toward the door.
"Thanks doc, for everything. You really have no idea how lost we'd be in this without you." Dean thanked as he opened the panic room door and stepped outside.
"Not a problem kid, I'll see you in a few." He replied insouciantly, waving him off.
A half hour later, Sam was asleep and recovering from the minor surgery, and Dean was at his usual spot by his side, stroking his hand and whispering soft reassurances while waiting to see those beautiful hazel orbs open up to him once more.
He knew then if they could make it through this, they could really make it through absolutely anything.