~Standing Here But You Don't See Me~

Over the next few days, I'd gotten to know the boys better. But I definitely was closer to Liam, just because we both clicked really well. He's a good talker, and I didn't have any trouble continuing the conversation with him. Pixie liked to joke about how close we're getting and found the urge to pinpoint every single moment we spend with each other in the studio.
Pixie was one of the backup dancers for the tour, and sometimes I hang out with her in the studio while the boys tend to their business. She knows a lot about boys but she doesn't know a lot about what type of boys I like. Because I've never really had a crush before. Zayn and Pixie had never once heard me talking about a guy before because well, I don't really much care about them at the moment.

But Pixie had been pestering me about Liam so much, that I had to give in and look at him in a different way. But I only told her after a few more days, cos I hate to see her be right.

"Pixie?"

"Lila? Why're you calling me at..10 in the morning?"

"Oh my god, I can't even say it out..I think..I think I might like Liam"

Silence.

"Pixie, are you there? Pixie?"

"AHHHHHHHH! I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT!"

She was squealing in excitement, when I'm freaking out? What is she so happy for?

"Oh my god, Lila! I told you you'll like him sooner or later. Aww..this is SO cute! But Lila..you do know that he already-"

She got interrupted by another beep on my phone.

"Oh Pixie hold on, I'm getting another call." "Hello?"

"Hey Lila, it's Liam. Just wanted to know if you're coming down to the studio today? I've written a new song, and wanted to know your opinion about it."

As soon as he said that, my heart automatically skipped a beat. Why was I excited to hear his voice? Is this how girls feel when they have crushes?

"Erm..yeah, I think I'm coming."

"Great! I have to go now but I can't wait for you to be here, love ya, bye!"

'Love ya?' He's never said that to me before. I can't help but bring my hopes up that maybe he likes me too. Then I won't have anything to worry about. Maybe the song he's playing for me later is a love song to me..

I shook my head to clear my thoughts. What was I thinking? I'm not supposed to fall for him, but I find myself fantasizing about him.

I came by the studio at 2 in the afternoon to meet Liam.

"Hello?" I peeped in the glass window of the door.

Seems like he's not here yet.
I walked around the corridor, waiting for him. I was nearing the end of the corridor when I heard a guy's voice. It sounded like Liam, and I got so excited to see him so I thought I'll say hi to him. But as I walked nearer, the conversation between him and whoever he's calling gets clearer.

"So I'll pick you up tonight at 7?... Uh huh..No, what are you talking about? You're always gorgeous...ok ok, I'll see you tonight. Can't wait..Hey..I love you..Haha, ok bye"

He put down the phone and turned. Too quickly I didn't managed to hide myself. In fact, my feet were stuck on the ground. My face clearly looked like I've seen a ghost because the first thing he asked was if I was alright.

"Hey! You're here! What's with the look on your face?"

I couldn't bring myself to answer the question without breaking down. Inside, I could feel my heart breaking. He has a girlfriend already? Why didn't I know this? Why hadn't he told me before? We've had so many conversations before and he didn't think of telling me that one little piece of information? Or at least make it seem like he's not single?

"..I..I..sorry, I need to go"

And I rushed out of that place, crying. I don't know what got over me, but all I wanted to do was cry. And I was so busy crying that I didn't look where I was going and I bumped into someone. I looked up only to see Niall's smile turned into a worried frown when he saw my tears. I continued running and when I finally reached the toilet, I locked myself in one of the cubicles and sunk myself down. The tears were just streaming down and my chest felt so heavy. Outside, I could faintly hear Niall asking if I'm alright.

I couldn't bear to make him see me like this. He doesn't know anything and I'd hate to make him feel guilty and I'm not proud of the reason I'm crying in the first place. So I waited till he stopped pounding on the door to get out. It seems forever till the pounding stopped. Why does he even care so much? We rarely even talk to each other. When I could hear nothing, I washed my face and stepped out.

"Lila?"

I was caught offguard. Niall was looking at me with a worried face. He was leaning against the wall outside the toilet, clearly waiting for me. His blue eyes were shimmering in the light, as if he himself had been crying. I didn't know what to do.

I tried to smile at him, so that he won't be so worried. But it felt so hard to move even a muscle. I shook my head to tell him there was no problem. But my mouth was clearly quivering because he immediately hugged me so tight that I broke down into tears again. It was a comforting hug, and it felt so good to cry on his shoulders. I didn't know how long we were in that position, but it felt long. I didn't want him to let go just yet, and he didn't seem like he's letting go any time soon.