~Trouble Sleeping~

Two months had passed since the fateful incident with my dad. He still hadn't fully recovered though he was getting better and times was hard as ever. With my final exams coming up, I was draining myself out with the late nights and exhausting work-hours. My pay wasn't enough to pay for my school fees, and my dad's rehab sessions, even with three jobs. Anne had been kind enough to help out with my assignments sometimes, but that was all she could do to help. And I didn't want to bother her too much, especially since she had helped me out so much.

With all that's happening, I didn't had time to contact Niall at all. After he left for London again, things were okay for a few weeks. Then I lost a tutee. Then the bills came in and I was in debt. And I freaked out. I was angry all the time. I tried not to be angry with my dad, because he didn't intentionally put me in this situation so it wasn't his fault. I was angry at myself really, for not being able to cope with a little bit of hardness and difficulty and when the pressure built up I just wanted to shout at someone. So unfortunately, Niall was the one who received it. I get pissed everytime Niall called, and we would end up arguing over the phone. After a while, Niall didn't even bother to call me up at night. And to be honest, I didn't even notice the change until much much later. My mind was always on something else, and I didn't want to think of the problems in my relationship. I had too much to handle already.

I talked about it to Anne and she convinced me that I should just concentrate on my responsibilities right now, instead of caring much about Niall. She was getting along with her boyfriend apparently. She had been smiling more these past few days,and when I asked her why, she said it was because of her boyfriend. I didn't know much about her personal life. She just merely shared some stories with me, and left the rest for me to wonder. Apparently even though he's in London, they still managed to make each other smile everyday. I sometimes wonder why that wasn't the case for Niall and I.

Once in a while, Pixie would call in worried about me. She was used to getting updates about me through Niall, but since we rarely talk anymore, she and Zayn had been taking turns to call me up. I didn't know why, but I'd never get angry with them. Maybe it was because I knew them so well, and they knew me well enough to know which buttons not to push.

One night, I got a call from Pixie. Her voice throughout the conversation worried me.

"Pixie, is there something wrong? You sound so weird today" I asked.

"What? No..no..not at all.." she replied rather unconvincingly.

"Pixie, don't try to lie to me. Tell me, what is it?"

"Well..can I ask you a question?"

"Of course"

"Have you been talking to Niall recently? I mean, like on the phone"

A weird question but I answered it anyways. "No I haven't. You know how things are with us right now."

"Yeah..that's the thing, Lila. I overheard Niall talking on the phone, and he was kinda flirting and giggling. At first I thought you guys were talking again, but.."

"But what Pixie?"

"I don't think I should tell you. It isn't my place!"

"You already told me half of the story, you can't just leave me hanging!"

I heard a ruffle through the phone, then Zayn's voice was heard.

"Lila? Lila, don't worry about it alright? I'm sure Pixie just overheard something at the wrong time."

"Zayn? You knew about this?"

"Well yeah, Pixie had to tell someone right? Look, don't dwell on it so much. Niall's a good guy, he won't be doing such stuff to you."

"Yeah..I'm not worried much about that.." I said, this time I was the one unconvinced.

I didn't had a good sleep that night. I kept wondering what Pixie had heard Niall say to whoever it was. I knew no other girl he might have been talking to like that. The whole reason why we're still together was because we trusted each other. I realised that night how long we hadn't talked. It seemed short when my mind was always busy with other things. But now that I stopped to think about it, it had been almost a month. How did we end up like this? I felt so guilty for ignoring him all these while. I made a mental note to call him in the morning. We're gonna be okay.