A/N: Okay so the first chapter didn't get a lot of feedback or hits. I kinda figured it was because I posted it at a crappy time and on the Monday when the finale aired. Anyway, so here's the second chapter; so hopefully there's more interest in this because I really want to give this story a shot, but if no one reads it, well then it's kinda pointless, isn't it.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer - Castle is not mine. I wish.

(Updated version - spotted a few mistakes)

Chapter 2 – You and I were never meant to be

"It was a mistake."

The words burned through him. Scorched him. Charred him. Blackened his soul. It was all-consuming and overwhelming, threatening to turn him to ash. To mutilate him. To destroy him. He was a sacrificial lamb on her alter. She a ruthless, demanding goddess.

His heart an unexpected casualty in their collision.

"It was a mistake. I'm sorry."

Yeah, she basically ripped him to pieces with that guilt-ridden, spoken-in-a-sigh-admission. It had been a week since L.A., since their night together. He had kept quiet about it for her sake. He tried to ignore the massive elephant in the room for her sake. He had tried to not to dream about her... for both their sakes. But after (unintentionally) hearing her set up a casual lunch date with her doctor boyfriend, something shot through him - a combination of rage, jealousy, confusion and a whole lot of pain. He had confronted her in the break room as calmly as he could. She had been angry (no livid) and subsequently pulled him into one of the more private conference rooms. After a few minutes of arguing about the inappropriateness of the conversation at her workplace, she finally dropped her head, briefly closed her eyes and uttered those dreaded words in a whisper.

It sliced through him, paralysed him, crushed him.

She was running from the truth, he knew that. The worst of it all? His acquiescence. His acceptance of her blatant lie. Not only a lie to him, to everyone else, but to herself. She was lying to herself. She was fighting them. He was tired of fighting them. He wanted to be an 'us'. Unfortunately, however, cowardice had won on the day. He quietly and numbly nodded his head, stored away his confession of undying love into the deepest, darkest corner of his heart and masked the agony he was feeling.

"Yeah, I understand. I get it." He had heard himself say.

Well, that was just it - he didn't understand and he didn't get it.

And he didn't want to.

He loved her.

"It was a mistake. I'm sorry... It won't happen again."

Thing is, he wanted it to happen again. He wanted it to happen for the rest of his life. He wanted her. All of her. The good and the bad; the light and the dark; the beauty and the pain. For better or worse.

He wanted them. Writer and Detective; Castle and Beckett; Rick and Kate. Friends, partners, lovers.

He wanted it all.

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He loves her.

And that's why he's here, standing in front of her door – flowers in hand and heart on his sleeve. He wants her to say that she feels it too, he wants her to admit that they could be more, he wants her to deny her denial.

But he also knows that if she rejects him again, that it might be the last straw.

That it might break him.

That it might break them.

"Castle!" she answers surprised; her brow furrowing in confusion. They've seen each other a few hours ago after closing a case. "What- what are you doing here?" She asks, anxiously running a hand through her hair. She's out of her work attire and in yoga pants, a worn-out NYPD hoodie and barefoot. Domestic, comfortable and distinctly Kate. She's small, he notices absent-mindedly. He wants to wrap his arms around her slight frame and pull her to him. He wants to hold her. Comfort her. Love her.

But he sees her frowning face and suddenly feels stupid for buying her flowers. They're not dating. They're not a couple. They're... what the hell were they? Well, that's what he was there to establish, to clarify.

Hopefully to change.

He clears his throat and speaks. "Can I come in?"

She considers him for a moment, hanging on the door while chewing on her lower lip. It takes all of his restraint not to grab and kiss her senseless once she does that. She was much too adorable and alluring when she did that. Damn it!

She sighs and let him in. "What do you want, Castle?" She asks, folding her arms protectively across her chest. He almost answers 'you', but thinks better of it.

He purses his lips and swallows. "We need to talk, Kate." His tone is low and serious and lacking all of its familiar joviality.

She lets out a breath and moves into the kitchen. "We've already talked." Her tone is condescending and dismissive.

It pisses him off.

"No, you talked. I listened." He pauses for a moment. "I haven't said my piece yet." He puts the unacknowledged flowers on the kitchen counter top.

She tries to ignore the flowers which, by the way, are her favourite. Why does he have to be such a sweet man? She shrugs casually. "What's there left to say?" Her tone is weary. She tries to keep her face blank, but her stomach is in knots. Her heart is slamming against her chest.

Her denial and faux-indifference pisses him off further.

"Damn it, Kate! Don't talk to me like this isn't a big deal." His tone is harsh and it surprises her for a moment. "Don't tell me it didn't mean anything." His voice doesn't waver, but his cobalt blues are pleading with her.

She averts his eyes and licks her lips, not ready to admit that it did in fact mean something. She's content in her denial. Safe in the conviction that it was a huge mistake. And she's sticking to the script, even though her heart wants to deviate from that. "It was a mistake, Castle."

The use of his last name and her weary denial enrages him. It cuts through him; it's bound to leave another scar.

He sparks into action, words tumbling hotly out of his mouth. "No. You know what? It wasn't a mistake." Here goes nothing. "We weren't a mistake. We're not-"

"It was just sex, okay?" She cuts him off sharply. "It was a lapse in judgement on my part. I was vulnerable, you were there. Telling me that I was beautiful, telling me what I needed to hear. You were being the charming Richard Castle... and I didn't resist. I allowed you to sweep me off my feet."

A myriad of emotions dances across his features, finally settling on hurt and anger. His straightens his posture and clenches his jaw. His eyes smoldering with emotion.

He takes a step forward and she takes a step back. "Oh no, no, no - you're not putting this all on me." His voice is low and heated. "May I remind you, Detective, that you were a very willing participant."

She blows out a slow breath and tilts her head upward. She returns her gaze to him. He is tense, she notices. She doesn't like him tense. "Yeah, I know. And I regret it." She thinks it's the truth, tries to convince herself that what she felt towards the (now defeated) man in front of her could be buried... again.

He slowly shakes his head and takes another step towards her; there are only about four paces between them. "Stop fighting it. Please." His expression his pleading, his eyes are softer (and distinctly sadder) in their perusal of her features, his voice is a quiet rumble. He takes another step towards her, she backs up to the counter.

"Stop fighting what, Castle?" She knows exactly what he's referring to, but she's not about to lose control again. She can't afford to lose control with him.

"Us, Kate." His voice caresses her name and she resists a shiver because of it. Another step. Only two very close paces left between them.

She swallows, willing her voice not to break due to his ever-increasing proximity. "There is no us, Rick."

He closes the distance between their bodies, lifts his hand and tentatively cups her cheek. "There could be." She closes her eyes at his touch and tries not to lean into it. "Give me chance," he whispers, his breath swirling in her hair. This time she does shiver. "I want to make you happy."

"No, I- I can't." Her voice is unsteady as he places a kiss in her hair.

"Why not?" He murmurs before planting a feathery kiss on her cheekbone.

"You know why. It just-"

"I love you." His confession is sudden and impulsive and shocks them both. Her eyes snap to his, wide and filled with fear. The moment his eyes meet hers he knows the spell has been broken; that he has made a mistake in unloading that unto her. She steps around and away from him, a hand in her hair and emotions tumultous within her.

"Kate-" He tries to amend, to explain, to express it again.

She turns around, sighs and holds up a hand. "No. Please just don't."

He doesn't care; he's diving in, showing his hand. "I'm in love with you. Kate, I-"

"I'm with Josh."

His brow furrows. His jaw set in gritty determination. "You don't love him."

She clenches her jaw. Time to bring out the big guns. "He asked me to move in with him and I've said yes." It feels like a blow to his gut. "And I do love him, Rick." A shot to his heart. "We-" She gestures between them. "-were never meant to be."

He goes numb as he stares at her for what feels like an eternity. She breaks the gaze and something snaps within him. He feels a coldness, a hardness, a brokenness seep into his soul.

Worldlessly he turns around, swallowing past the lump in his throat, and walks out the door in a daze. He doesn't bother to look back. Doesn't bother to argue that point of contention. Doesn't bother to fight against the lie.

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

Bullshit.

Richard Castle begs to differ.

A/N: Ah the angst! Yes, Kate is a stupid, stupid woman, but she's in denial. Anyway, don't worry this is a journey with a destination... obviously that destination being Caskett. But I love angst so yeah, expect more of that.

Please review and tell me what you think.

Thanks for reading!