A/N: Hi there, remember me? Yeah, I'm the writer who doesn't update for like four months and then, boom, suddenly inspiration hits. What can I say? That's just the way I operate. And I'm embracing that. I'm just not good with the whole update-everyday-thing like some brilliantly talented writers in this fandom are able to do. Anyway, I have to say for over the last few months I have been stuck on how to continue this story. I kinda wrote myself into a bit of a hole, but hopefully with this installment, the muse will return.

So, please forgive me and enjoy this way overdue chapter. Remember we left off where Rick was on a book tour, being all miserable and Kate was back in New York, being all miserable. And then she got his book and read the dedication and then her heart kinda melted and that's where we left it.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately they are not mine. *Sigh*

(Italics - flashbacks)

Chapter 9 - Someone Like You

"Kate?"

"Yeah?"

"I want to ask you something."

[][][]

She's nervous. No, scratch that. She's scared shitless. Absolutely terrified. This could either go very well, ending with him spinning her around like in a cheesy movie scene. Or it could go horribly wrong with him rejecting her and shattering her fragile heart.

She really hopes for the former because she's made her choice. She has chosen to follow her heart. And it has led her here. To him. The sun to her bleak, dreary world.

But what will she find? Who will she find? And most importantly: will he still feel the same?

Her palms are sweaty, her heart rate is picking up the closer the elevator gets to his floor. She knows he's back. It's been in the papers and she overheard Ryan and Esposito talking about it. Okay, so she kinda eavesdropped on that conversation, desperate for any piece of information regarding him. It was that summer all over again. He's been back for a week already. She's aware of that, but she needed time. Time to gather the courage. Time to prepare herself for this. Time to get all of her defenses in order if things go south.

But, no matter what the outcome, there would be no 'if onlys' anymore.

No going back now.

She lets out a shaky breath and tilts her head back against the elevator wall and closes her eyes for a few moments, her mind wandering back over the whirlwind of life-changing events of the last few weeks.

[][][]

He was smiling at her, the affection, the hope, written all over his handsome face and his dark eyes showing everything she didn't feel. She could love him. The dashing doctor, handsome and kind and sweet. She really could. Given time, a lot of time.

But he wasn't Rick.

"Hey." Josh greeted, leaning in to peck her cheek.

He couldn't spin crazy theories, or bring her coffee at 5am in the morning, or make her laugh in the midst of dread and death.

Or write her a love story. For her, to her, because of her.

"Hey." Kate returned a smile, stepping into Josh's apartment.

"So, I made your favourite," he said as he led her into the kitchen.

She smiled briefly. "It smells great."

He handed her a glass of wine, looking nervous. "Here you go."

"Oh, uh, thanks." She glanced around, becoming aware of the soft flickering light of the candles, the table that was set for two.

Huh. O-kay.

"What's the occasion?" Kate asked, nudging her head towards the multitude of candles.

Josh laughed tightly and shrugged. "Ah, just... you know - celebrating."

Celebrating?

She frowned. "O-kay. What exactly are we celebrating?"

His smile widened. "Us. Our future," Josh said cryptically, his usual charming self while he clinked his glass with hers. "You moving in... Eventually."

Damn it.

He was bringing up living together again and wanted to know why she hadn't moved in yet. And he was referring to their future.

Shit. Shittery. Shit-shit.

She really didn't have the strength for this. It's only been two days since Lanie grimly shoved the latest Nikki Heat into her hands and two days since she read that heartbreaking and beautiful dedication. Addressed to her mother, but for Kate.

Always for Kate.

She sighed, putting her glass down. She felt weary and that weariness seeped into her tone "Josh, please, I-"

"-I know, Kate," he cut her off, the smile sliding off his face. He blew out a breath, resignation flickering in his eyes, and scrubbed a hand over his face."Look, why don't we just enjoy dinner and talk about this later, okay?"

[][][]

"Kate!"

Shit. Shittery. Shit-shit.

Her heart pounds even faster now. It's not Castle standing in front of her, but Alexis. And she looks wary, on guard.

"Alexis, hi."

The teenager recovers quickly and a steeliness, a coldness takes up residence in her eyes and throughout her posture.

"What are you doing here?" Her tone is icy and accusing.

Well, who could blame her?

Kate twists her hands nervously, briefly glancing down at her shoes, gathering courage, before looking at Alexis again. She sees anger, disappointment, a flicker of hope, but mostly hurt scattered all over the young woman's face.

"I- I'm here to see your dad. I..." She takes a breath. "I need to talk to him. Can I come in?"

Alexis folds her arms across her chest, closing up. The girl is trying to protect herself.

From her, from Kate. And that stings.

A lot.

"He's not here."

Kate nods slowly, accepting the frigid response from Castle's daughter. She broke his heart. She deserves this.

"Okay."

An uncomfortable silence envelopes them, stifles the atmosphere. What now? Alexis is looking at her expectantly, eyebrows raised and mouth set in a grim line. Kate could take the hint and just leave, but she can see it in the girl's eyes - she wants what her father wants.

An answer. An explanation. Something.

The detective takes a breath. "Alexis, I don't know if you know what happened between your father and me, but-"

"Save it." Okay, maybe she doesn't want answers or an explanation. She wants to rip the detective a new one. Draw some blood. "I know exactly what happened, Detective," Alexis spits out, her tone dripping with bitterness. It doesn't suit her. Her blue eyes are blazing and watery, a tumult of emotions swirling around in them with everything she is feeling clear to see, to dissect, to flinch from.

So much like her father.

"You broke his heart. That's what happened. He's crazy, absolutely crazy about you, but you're just too blind and stupid and selfish to care." Hot, traitorous tears fall one by one down her cheeks while she makes her impassioned speech. The teenager swipes angrily at them, not willing to let the older woman see them. To see how much Kate's rejection hurt. To see how much she also felt. To see how much her father's pain is wounding her as well.

Kate's own eyes widen. "Alexis, no-"

"-He's in love with you, but you don't feel the same. That's it, right?" Kate is shaking her head and taking a step closer.

That's a lie.

"-Wait, that isn't-" She's desperate to make the girl understand - she loves him. She loves him. The nine-year-old-on-a-sugar-rush, man-child, Assistant Volunteer Homicide Detective, writer of wrongs, one and done, love of her life. Him. Rick Castle. Maybe she's a little late in realizing her own feelings, maybe she's a little lost when it comes to her own heart, maybe she's a little stupid when it comes to what she wants.

But she's here now.

She's here with everything, with her heart, with her bared soul. That has to count for something, right?

"Kate, why don't you just do us all a favour - especially my dad - and just get out of here." Alexis is blinking away the fresh, hot tears teeming in her eyes. Kate's breath hitches at the sorrow in the girl's voice. "Just... leave. For good. Don't call, don't-"

"Alexis?"

Martha.

Great. Just perfect. First the daughter, now the mother.

"Who's at the-" Martha stops short, her mouth opened in shock. She recovers well and masks her surprise quickly. "Kate!" She smiles, a smile that doesn't reach her eyes. "Well, isn't this a lovely surprise?"

Martha Rodgers is really a good actress because it's clear that this isn't a 'lovely surprise'. Quite the opposite actually.

The older redhead opens the door that her granddaughter has stubbornly kept closed and sweeps her arm out to invite Kate inside.

"Come on in." Alexis whips her head around to glare at her grandmother while Kate gapes at her.

Wait. What?

"Gram! She can't-"

"Alexis." Her voice is strong and laced with a warning. She doesn't look at her granddaughter, but keeps her clear, all-seeing blue eyes on Kate. Her gaze also holding a warning, saying: "If you don't get in here now, then don't bother coming back." Kate doesn't hesitate any longer and steps inside, passing Castle's daughter.

The teenager is shaking her head, her arms folded and her eyes welling up again with fresh tears. Martha takes a few moments to talk quietly with the younger redhead, rubbing her hands up and down the girl's arms in an effort to soothe her. She gives Kate one final glare before stalking up the stairs.

"Alexis-" Kate starts going after her, but is stopped when the older woman gently grasps her arm.

"Leave it, Dear," Martha sighs. "She'll cool down. Eventually."

The detective takes another glance up the stairs before letting Martha lead her to the kitchen. She sits down and watches the matriarch taking out glasses from the cupboard, humming a tune merrily as she goes along. She stays quiet, not sure how to approach the subject of Rick Castle with his mother, not even sure how much she knows. However, judging by Alexis' reaction, it is a safe bet that Martha knows a great deal.

Probably too much.

She's shaken out of her thoughts when a glass of red wine is set before her. "Here you go, Kiddo. It looks like you need it."

Why is she being so kind?

"Uh... thank you, Martha." And she's not just referring to the glass of wine. They sit in silence for a few moments, which of course feels like hours to Kate. She needs to say something, anything, to try to expla-

"You know, you are really not Richard's type," Martha says, breaking the silence. O-kay. To take offense or not to take offense? That is the question. "And I'm grateful for that." Taking offense then it is. "I'm happy that my son has fallen in love with someone who is nothing like the flighty women he usually spends his time with," the older woman continues, her translucent eyes boring into Kate's.

Oh. She approves?

Kate swallows and breaks eye contact, suddenly feeling a wave of emotion hitting her. "Martha, I-"

"Please, let me finish, Kate," Martha says quietly, placing a hand on the detective's hand. "I was happy to see that he was getting up in the morning, full of purpose and drive and something to look forward to. His life had meaning." She directs her gaze back towards the beautiful detective. "And that was all because of you."

There's a 'but' coming up, isn't there?

"But... you've hurt him." Kate is taken aback when Martha turns tear-filled eyes toward her. "You've truly hurt him, Kate."

The detective swallows past the lump in her throat, her vision blurring rapidly. "I know," she whispers, her voice cracking under the pressure of emotion. "I know I have, Martha. And I'm so unbelievably sorry for that. I was a coward, pushing him away like I did." She turns her eyes to the older woman, hoping to show her that she, Kate Beckett, loves her son. That she is somehow worthy of him. "But that's why I'm here. I want to to fix this... if I can."

"You've caused a lot of damage," the older woman states. She likes Kate, but what she did cut deeply.

To the bone.

"I know," she agrees again, because there's no way around it. There's no way around the truth.

Silence joins and covers them as they sit together, lost in thought. Martha, with serious, almost pleading, praying eyes turns to Kate - to the love of her son's life - and breaks the overwhelming quietness. No pretending any longer, no meandering around the subject.

"Do you love my son, Kate?"

Yes, a million times yes.

The realisation that she loved him didn't surprise her, it wasn't an epiphany of some sort. It wasn't a bolt of lightning that suddenly hit her. It was simply a fact, the truth.

Kate Beckett loves Richard Castle. Period.

Simple, plain truth. And everyone knows the truth sets you free.

One way or another.

"Yes... Yes, I do, Martha." She takes a breath, closing her eyes for a moment. "I love him so much, it hurts."

And Martha Rodgers sees it.

She sees it written all over the younger woman's beautiful face. A poem of affection scribbled on the lift of her lips, a love story painted in the green of her irises.

She loves him.

"Well... then you need to tell him, Dear," she states simply with a twitch of her lips; like it's the most obvious, the most natural thing in the world.

Kate Beckett loves Rick Castle. Rick Castle loves Kate Beckett.

Period.

And for the first time in a long time, a smile breaks free over her face, over her being. Like a caged bird set free to fly.

She will tell him.

And it will set her, him, them free.

[][][]

"How was it?" Josh asked, clearing the table.

She smiled faintly. "Wonderful, thank you."

Kate felt uneasy, her gut telling her that something was up. She just couldn't put her finger on it. Before she could further dwell on those thoughts, Josh returned with dessert.

He smiled, placing the plate with a dark chocolate cake in front her along with a strong cup of coffee. She was a simple girl. Just give her coffee and a delicious cake.. and a fortune cookie? Sure she loved fortune cookies and Chinese food, but it didn't really fit with the whole Italian-vibe he had going on tonight.

She looked at him, her brow furrowed as she gestured to the cookie. "What's with the fortune cookie?"

He only shrugged and smiled coyly. "Felt like it. And you like them, don't you?"

She shrugged and started on her delicious, dark, decadent chocolate cake. An orgasmic, death by chocolate cake. They ate in silence for a few minutes. She noticed that he became fidgety and jittery and completely nervous.

So unlike him.

"Thanks, that was divine," she said with a satisfied smile, licking the icing from her finger.

He returned a soft smile and leaned in to brush a kiss against her mouth, tasting chocolate and coffee. After breaking from the kiss, she turned her attention to the fortune cookie.

Why did it feel so heavy? But before she could break it open, Josh spoke.

"Kate?"

"Yeah?"

"I want to ask you something."

She looked at him, something in her chest clenching tightly at the serious tone of his voice.

He swallowed visibly before clearing his throat. "Before... I do that, I-I need you to know something."

She stared at him and nodded dumbly, encouraging him to continue.

His gaze shifted away from hers for a brief instance before returning. "I have a decision to make. A decision that could change everything. For us." She wasn't breathing, her heart was hammering against her chest, trying to break free. "There's an opportunity for me to go to Darfur for a Doctors Without Borders-mission."

Oh.

She cleared her throat, not sure what to think or feel, a whirlwind of emotions overwhelming her. "For how long?"

"Uh, six months."

Oh.

When she didn't say anything or react visibly to the news and only kept her head down, Josh grasped her hand tightly, like a desperate man about to fall over the edge of a cliff. "But, I- I won't go." Her head snapped up at this. "On one condition." When he didn't continue, her brow furrowed.

Then he slid to the floor on one knee in front of her and she understood. Perfectly. Painfully.

She froze in shock and horror, her heart climbing out of her throat, trying to make a run for it.

"Katherine Beckett-" he was wearing a tentative smile, his eyes so, so hopeful and loving.

Oh. God.

Ohgodohgodohgod!

"-will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?"

[][][]

"There you go," Rick says for what feels like the millionth time, smiling that completely fake-but-still-dazzling smile. "Thank you for coming out." The smile automatically drops from his face as he waits for the next fan.

He is tired.

Of six weeks of traveling and book signings and appearances and smiling and pretending to be fine and trying to block out dreams of her.

He is tired.

Of stopping his heart beating for her, of shutting his eyes to keep from searching her out in a crowd, of not hoping that the next breath he takes is hers.

A poke on his shoulder drags him out of his thoughts. Of her. Again. It's Paula, looking irritated... as usual. "Rick, can you get a move on, please? We still have to get to that interview. We only have about two hours and this line looks like it's about three hours long. So stop daydreaming and do your job," the feisty agent hisses into his ear before stepping back and glaring at him.

Frick. Frack. Fruck.

"Sure thing, Boss," he bites out sarcastically, gritting his teeth. Why he has to do another interview is beyond him. Can't he just go home and not come out... ever again? What does it matter anyway? It's not like there is going to be another Nikki Heat novel now that Rook is dead.

Yeah, he killed Rook by putting a bullet in his heart. A bullet that was meant for Nikki.

Oh, the symbolism.

He looks up and plasters a smile on his face for the overeager fan with the wide-eyed expression of awe. Time to put on the Rick Castle show.

"Oh, this is sooo exciting!" The pretty young blonde girl squeals (literally squeals). She doesn't notice him wince at the sound. "I- I'm such a huge fan of your work." He nods, still smiling stiffly.

"So, to who can I make it out to?"

"Umm, Cindy," the girl says shyly, twirling a piece of hair in a pathetic attempt to flirt with him.

Why do women always twirl their hair when they flirt? Even Kate-

He closes his eyes for a moment, trying to get rid of the memory of a beautifully smiling Kate, twirling her hair. But he can't get rid of it because the recollection is burned into the slates of his mind. As with every memory of her.

She's there, always there.

"Here you go, Cindy," he says, handing the book to the girl. "Thank you for coming out." The girl giggles and is watching him with wide, doe-like eyes, probably hoping for a wink and a salacious smile.

Too bad, groupie, he's not in the mood.

He continues signing, asking for a name and making polite chit-chat. Unfortunately every fifteenth fan or so always asks him why he killed Rook. His tense answer is always the same - Rook was no longer needed in Nikki's life. It's surprising and unsatisfying, but, hey, it's art imitating life.

Well, life according to Rick Castle.

Another copy (maybe the hundredth today?) slides in front of him with a dark, sexy silhouette etched onto the cover page. Of course, it reminds him of her. Rick sighs mentally and doesn't bother looking up when he asks:

"Who can I make it out to?"

There's a beat of silence before the persons speaks.

"Kate."

Kate.

He freezes; shock, hope and excitement warring with one another. It can't be.

'Please let this be real. Please let this be real. Please let this be real' the mantra, prayer, exultation silently screams through him. Because if it's not her, then-

He finally looks up, his blue eyes wide and unbelieving. No, it's not a dream or a mirage or a sick joke.

She's here. In the flesh. Looking at him with with those eyes, those dark, mystery-filled eyes. Her hair tumbling in waves over her shoulders, her face soft and caressed with an unfamiliar vulnerability.

He can't breath; he's like a deer caught in the headlights because she's just-

Exquisite.

So, so beautiful that his heart breaks open with an outpouring of adoration. Love overwhelms him, overpowers him, threatens to consume him. It's intense and passionate and dangerous because she's... everything. Every line, every word, every paragraph, every page left in him.

His book of love.

"You can make it out to Kate."

A/N: Well, how was that folks? Are you satisfied with this update or not? This story does have a mind of its own and the characters as well; that might be a reason why I have found it so difficult to update. Forgive me.

Please, please, please review and tell me whether I still got it or not for this story. In return I will try to provide you with quicker updates. Hint: reviews tend to feed the muse.

The title of this chapter is from that beautiful Adele song "Someone like you." I think it fits nicely with this chapter.