Hey everyone, Shia Zen, I'll use that instead then :) I want to warn those reading that this chapter is probably going to be horrible. Not horrible as in my writing, at least I hope not? I'll let you be the judge of that, but as in it's going to deal with horrible things like child abuse, and probably rape. I know I've tip toed around it before, but in order to get a better understanding of Jack and his coming actions I think I need to describe some of what happened to him, at least what happened according to this story. I've never written anything like it before so I don't know how I'll manage it but we'll see. I also don't know far I'll go. I just wanted to warn you that it's not going to be fun. If I do it right it's going to be sad, tragic and full of angst. I'm going to try and do the best I can, but like I said, I'm new at writing this kind of stuff. I don't own four brothers.

"Jack... Jack come on boy, you know I'll find you anyway. Come out come out wherever you are..."

He was paralyzed with fear. He couldn't move. His head was telling him to run, run far away, but his body wouldn't listen. He tried to tell his legs to get up, but they didn't listen. Why didn't they work?

"Jack, your making me angry. You won't like that".

"His heartbeat is speeding up" The doctor mumbled checking his monitor.

Angel and Jerry was once again on either side of Jack, holding his hands. Other than the sound from the machine that signaled his heartbeat there was nothing that showed that Jack was still alive. They had been talking to him for hours now, and he didn't respond. He had had episodes like this before, when he had just moved in with them, and some other times as he got older, but they had never lasted this long. Evelyn or Bobby had always managed to get through to him someway, but they couldn't help him now.

Jerry rubbed his hands over his eyes and tried to push away the horrible feeling of guilt that ate at him. This wasn't the time. But he couldn't help but feel that this, his Ma's death, Bobby being shot and Jack being trapped in his own mind, was his fault. If only he had agreed to Sweet's terms, if only he could have been happy with what he had, instead of reaching for the stars. He should have known that it was not to be. And now, now they were all paying the price.

"You know I hate when I have to look for you Jack. Now what do you say?"

"I'm, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

Jack cried out when the belt hit his back hard. The agony was so intense, he fought back the urge to vomit, knowing it would only cause him more pain later.

"I'm sorry Mr Jensen!"

Stupid. Stupid Jack. How could he forget that he always wanted to hear his name, to be spoken to with respect.

"You know boy I'm starting to think that you like this, why else would you do everything you can to make me angry huh? I think you like a little pain don't you? Of course you do. Get up"

Jack took a deep breath and tried to get up on his knees, but the broken skin stretched against his back and he fell forward again, gasping in pain. A hard booth hit his stomach.

"Can't you do anything right?"

This time he couldn't hold back the vomit.

"Here"

Jerry handed Angel a cup of coffee before taking a large gulp himself, feeling the hot liquid burn his tongue. He welcomed the pain.

Angel studied Jerry for a few seconds.

"It's not your fault Jer"

Jerry looked up at him, a bitter smile curving his lips.

"Isin't it?"

"Jack, I promise this time it's going to be different, this is a good home"

Jack looked at Mr Roberts who was his social worker, but didn't say anything. Secretly he hoped he was right, he had to be right. They pulled up to an old house and Jack exited the car slowly, feeling a little excitement despite himself. Maybe this was it. Maybe this could be his home. Mr Roberts knocked on the door and it opened revealing an middle aged woman with brown hair and kind brown eyes.

"Well hello you must be Jack, I'm Sue, please come on in Mr Roberts, you too Jack"

"Hello" Jack's voice was a little unsure.

He looked around and noted that the inside of the house looked as old as it did on the outside. Not that it mattered to him.

"Oh silly me, Jack, this is my husband Rick"

Jack looked up and met the gaze of the man who had just entered.

"Hi there. I'm Rick"

He held out his hand to shake and Jack took it, when he tried to take it back the man held on to it a little longer before letting go.

"Well then I must be off. Jack, I've left a note for you in your bag with my number. Call if you need anything. Sue, Rick" He nodded at them before closing the door behind him.

Jack looked at the door for a few seconds before turning back around to find Mr Rhodes smiling at him.

"I hope you'll like it here Jack"

"I'm sorry Angel you know I have to do this"

"You don't have to do shit Green! I don't care what you say, if you think I'm going anywhere with you you are fucking wrong!"

"We can't leave Jack, or Bobby right now" Jerry added.

"Look I'm sorry, you know I care about both Bobby and Jack, but we need to talk, this is not going away"

"We know that Green, and we'll deal, without you" Angel spoke harshly.

"Look Green, I wanted you to deal with this, I did, I told my brothers to trust you, to trust the police but can you do it? Can we trust you?" Jerry was torn.

"Look it's not me you have to worry about..." Green trailed off. He knew the second he said those words that he had made a mistake.

"What? Who do we have to worry about then? Other than those we already know?" Angel was furious.

"I have, I have a dirty uniform to deal with" Green sighed, this wasn't easy for him.

Angel cursed and punched the wall in the waiting room. Jerry looked at Green like he was surprised. He was. He didn't know why.

"Who?" Jerry's voice was distant, cold.

"You know I can't tell you Jerry. Don't ask me to do that".

"Bullshit. You see that?" He pointed down the hall where Bobby and Jack's room was "That's my brothers. My brothers! They are in there, one riddled with bullets and the other one to fucking broken to talk, so don't tell me that you can't tell me who did that, don't tell me that you can't tell me why, because I don't fucking care! I trusted you, despite everything, I thought you could fix this, because I know you and I know your clean, I thought you could do this the legal way but I was wrong, so don't tell me that you can't do this for me, because I don't care" Jerry gasped and tried to force back the tears forming in his eyes. Angel's hand on the back of his neck was a comfort, and he tried to slow his breathing, but he couldn't and he turned around, coming to stand shoulder to shoulder with Angel, who was now facing Green.

"Fowler" Angel's voice was a statement, not a question.

Green shook his head and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry. But I can't let you do this, Fowler's my problem, and I'll deal with him. I swear Angel, I will, and then we'll get Sweet. I want to be honest with you, I do, but you have to promise me that you'll let me deal with this"

No sound came from Angel or Jerry and Green shook his head. Stubborn bastards. His voice was gentle when he spoke, as if trying to lessen the words impact.

"Evelyn knew Jerry"

The only response he got was a slight straightening of his back.

"She knew about your problems, and she knew you, and she wasn't going to stand aside and watch your future get thrown out the window. She was going after Sweet, and she filed a police report, but it ended up in the wrong hands" He met Angel's eyes "I'm sorry, you know I am".

Jerry hung his head low. It was as he suspected. All this was bacause of him.

"We're not leaving" Angel stated.

"Angel" Green's voice was tired and worn, if anyone who didn't know him would have heard him speak they would have thought he was an old man.

"No. Our brothers need us now, and we're not leaving them, who knows if Sweet's guys is going to show up here too"

Green thought about that for a second and realized that they were right, and he wasn't stupid enough to ask if they wanted police protection. If he had anything but sadness inside him at the moment he would have laughed at the thought of offering the Mercer brothers police protection. He nodded and turned to leave but Jerry's voice stopped him.

"Green" He turned around and met Jerry's eyes "There is something you can do for us"

Jack was laying in his bed trying to shake the feeling of unease that had settled over him since Mr Roberts had left. He had been fed, and Sue had told him that he could always come to her if there was something he wanted to ask. It all seemed good, so why was the jittering feeling in his body growing stronger by the second. He was so busy thinking that the knock on the door made him jump and gasp, he fought the urge to hide under the bed.

"Hi there Jack, comfortable?"

Mr Rhodes. Jack let out a quiet sound of relief.

"Yes, thank you for the extra blanket sir" his voice was trembling slightly, he still wasn't sure of where he stood.

"Oh it's no problem, I want you to be comfortable here Jack, since you're going to live with us now, and please call me Rick, sir makes me feel old"

That made Jack feel better and he nodded. Maybe they weren't as strict here as that other house. He tried to push the thought of Mr Jensen to the back of his head. That's over now Jack, you don't have to go back there. You have another home now. The thought made him smile as he looked up at Rick.

"My my, what a pretty smile you have Jack"

Jack's smile slipped a little. Something in Rick's tone sounded wrong, but he was still to young to understand why.

"I'm sure the rest of you is pretty too, am I right?"

Jack scooted further back on the bed, dragging the blanket with him as he went.

"Now now Jack, don't be like that. I gave you that blanket, I can just as easy take it away"

Jack's scared eyes locked on Rick's face as he sat down on the bed close to him.

"Now let's see what you got under all those clothes alright" he took a hold of Jack's shirt but Jack slapped his hand away, an instict that hadn't yet died despite his time spent at Mr Jensens house. The hard slap on his cheek made him yelp and clutch the blanket harder.

"Don't do that" Rick's voice was hard

"S S Sue" Jack stuttered out.

"Is fast asleep. A bottle of vodka will do that to you. Your to young to know that yet, but that's okay. I like young ones".

The night that followed was the most horrible and humiliating yet in Jack's young life, and had he known that it was going to get a lot worse before it got better he would have dug that razor deeper in his arms the morning after when Rick left for work.

Convincing the doctor that Jack and Bobby needed to stay in the same room wasn't easy, as most of the hospital staff had had just about enough of the Mercer brothers to last them a lifetime, and they probably couldn't have done it without Green. Angel was grumbling that he could sweet talk a nun into doing his bidding, and Jerry wasn't about to contradict him, afraid that he would try just to prove a point. As it was Green came through for them and Bobby and Jack now shared a room, which made them all feel a little better. It had felt to strange to have them in separate rooms, and this way they could protect them better if Sweet's goons were to come by. Then there was the weapons. They couldn't split up to get a gun and bring it here, and they also couldn't risk getting caught with one. They had a feeling the hospital would not accept that.

"Jer, while I was getting the sandwitches I thought of something. We have to have something to protect us with"

"I thought the same thing"

"Good"

Angel lifted his arm a little to show Jerry the skalpel hidden in his sleeve. Jerry nodded and seemed to hesitate before drawing an object a little bit out of his pocket. Angel leaned forward to squint at the lable. His eyes snapped up to Jerry's, his eyebrows high on his forehead.

"Hairspray?"

"Shut up man, I was in the toilet and some woman had left her bag there and..."

"What the fuck were you doing in the lady's room Jerry? And hairspray" he shook his head "you realize that Bobby is never going to let you live this one down" He laughed and it got stuck in his throat as he rested his eyes on Bobby " if he..." he trailed off and looked at the wall and waited for the hole in his chest to stop aching.

"When he wakes up he's going to tell me what an idiot I am, and ask what the fuck I was going to use the hairspray for, threaten to fix their hair?"

Angel looked back at Jerry, a grateful look in his eyes. They were quiet for a while before Angel spoke.

"You think we should have taken him home?" His eyes was on Jack's still form.

"No. We couldn't have left Bobby here, and Sweet is probably targeting the house. We're safer here, together".

Angel nodded, he knew Jerry was right.

"That was good of Green though, coming through for us, and letting us stay here"

"Yeah well, I think you telling him that we were going nowhere, and if he didn't like it he could shove his fucking thoughts up his fucking ass and get the hell out of here, convinced him" Jerry laughed a little. But soon stopped. It felt wrong.

"Good for him that he listened though" Angel let a small grin escape.

They were quiet again as they watched for any sign of life from their brothers.

"What about Fowler?" Angel spoke again.

"I don't know man" Jerry sighed "We can't do anything right now, might as well let Green do his thing for now"

Angel agreed since they had no other choice at the moment. A few hours later the news that Officer Green had been shot to death by two unidentified suspects reached them.

A hard punch made Jack land on the floor, a kick to his ribs made him gasp, and if he had any energy left he would have cried out. Laying down on the floor he could feel Rick yank his pants down before the now familiar sound of his zipper being lowered reached him. He didn't say anything as he grabbed a hold of Jack's hips and positioned himself behind him. One hard push later and he was inside him, grunting as he continued to force himself in and out. Jack tried to stifle his sobs, knowing that if he cried it would only be more painful, and sometimes Rick seemed to like his tears, and then once wouldn't be enough.

"We have to do something"

Angel was restless. Ever since Green had been killed he had been waiting for someone, anyone, to try and storm their hospital room. An hour ago he had almost hit the doctor as he came by to check on Jack and Bobby.

"I know, I know"

Jerry rested his head in his hands. There was only one thing more left to do, they were all to vulnerable like this. They couldn't do much about Bobby right now but...

"We have to find a way to bring Jack back, we have to try harder"

Angel turned around to meet his eyes.

Jack had decided. He was going to talk to Sue. Rick was at work, so he couldn't overhear. She said I could talk to her, she said that, Jack told himself as he walked into the livingroom. His eyes caught sight of the glass on the table before Sue where she sat in the couch, the liquid was clear, and he knew it wasn't water. He had noticed that she seemed to drink a lot more now than before. Maybe she's feeling bad too, he told himself.

It didn't go as Jack had planned. Sue threw the glass at him and called him a liar. Said that he was just some stupid ungrateful kid that was to fucked up to understand what family means. At least it got him out of there, because Sue called Mr Roberts and told him that she didn't want an ungrateful little shit like him living there. The note with Mr Roberts number that Jack had been looking so hard for had been in Sue's bag all the time he realized. He was in a group home before Rick was back from work and Jack had learned some valuable lessons. Always, always look through the bags, and never, ever trust anyone.

"Jackie, Jack... Please man. You've been gone a long time now, and we're worried. More than that. Shit is going on and... we need you man" Jerry's voice trailed off.

"I know you bro, and I know your past. And I know that's where you at right now, and I know you don't want to be there, and rememeber what Ma always said, the more you try to close it off the more stuck you get, so come back here, you know we'll take care of ya" Angel tried to keep his voice steady, but failed.

A year later Jack was still in the group home. It wasn't much better, but at least no one was touching him here, he'd rather take the punches the other kids, and sometimes social workers doled out. He could have continued like that if Mr Roberts hadn't found another family. But he did, and Jack once again found himself standing on the porch of another house. He listened as Mr Roberts said that this was great, a good family. He just had to try and be a little more social and everything would work out great.

As he once again saw Mr Roberts leave he barely had time to turn around before he was yanked forward and dragged into a bedroom. He froze at the sight of the bed, but that wasn't their destination he realized when he was thrown inside a closet with no light, hearing the lock click behind him. He sat there alone, without food or water for 2 days that first time. He had been forced to use the corner of the closet as a toilet when he couldn't hold it in anymore, and the smell was awful. But not as awful as being denied food.

For those lonely scary days he wondered why they had even wanted him. At the end of the second day he got his answer when the door opened and the man that had greeted him at the door when he first came dragged him out. Weak from hunger and thirst Jack didn't have any strenght to even try to fight, and his mind was on some kind of lockdown from being left alone in the dark for so long. So when the man stepped aside to reveal another man he hadn't seen before he barely reacted. Not even when the new man paid his new fosterparent did he react. He did react when the man threw him down on the floor though. He got two black eyes for it and what he suspected was a broken rib. It didn't do him any good though as he was to weak to fight and the man had the advantage of being older and larger, Jack was afterall still just a boy, a weak one at that. The unknown man left him bleeding on the floor with his pants around his ankles. When his fosterparent came to throw him back in the closet he still lay in that same position.

Hearing the lock click behind him he curled up on the floor. He had gotten the answer to his question. He knew now why he was here. Turns out that some people will do just about anything for a little extra money. Even take in an already broken fosterchild.

Jack lived in that closet for a year before the police stormed the house with a warrant. They wasn't looking for him no, they had gotten a tip that there were drugs being sold there and it was, it was not the only thing being sold though. Jack didn't say anything at the time, he didn't have to. The marks on his body and a guy busy trying to tear his clothes off tipped them off. Jack knew better than to talk, especially since he saw one of the guys who had used to come around often for awhile to use him. Only this time he was in a uniform. His cold glare told Jack that it was best to keep quiet, but he needn't have bothered. Jack had learned that lesson already.

The next year was in some ways a blur in Jack's mind. Probably because that in some of the fosterhomes they had given him drugs to keep him weak and out of it, leaving them to do as they wished with him. He spent some time in group homes, got beat up a lot, and learned another valuable lesson. Never look someone in the eye. That alone could piss people off.

He ran away after a particular hard beating he had gotten from an older boy and he lived on the streets for two months before they found him again. He had managed to survive, doing the only thing he knew, which was selling himself. He had never done it of his own will before, and he guessed they couldn't call it that now either, as he didn't want to, but he was hungry, and needed money.

Mr Roberts managed to find him again though. Jack didn't know what to think of him, persistent as he was he didn't seem to have much for brains. Not that it mattered, his word was law.

This time when Mr Roberts assured him that this was it, that this was going to be his family and that it was going to be all sunshine from now on he didn't bother to answer. And he wasn't surprised when it turned out that the husband liked kids and that his wife liked to watch. He did cry when they burned him with cigarettes though. Oddly enough it was the mailman that found him after a night of being raped, beaten and course, maybe they shouldn't have left him out on the lawn. That was possibly the worst night of Jack's life, and later when he sometimes thought of it he wondered if all that pain that night hadn't been worth it, since it was what led him to Evelyn.

"Do you remember his first night?" Angel almost whispered out the words.

"Of course I do man" Jerry's voice was sad.

"I still remember his screams"

Jerry looked over at Angel, then down at Jack.

"I do too"

"Jack this is Bobby, Angel and Jerry, they are my sons and like I said they live here too"

Jack didn't move an inch from the doorway. He looked terrified as he gazed at the three older boys. Bobby took a step forward but stopped when Jack flinched and ducked his head. He held out his hands to show that he didn't mean any harm, but Jack didn't move. After studying Jack for a few seconds Evelyn told the boys to watch a movie while she showed Jack his room. They didn't see him anymore that day, not until they all woke up to the most horrifying scream they had ever heard. Running to Jack's room they found that Evelyn was already there, trying to wake him up. She told them later that she had expected something like that to happen, and therefore had never gone to bed.

When Jack woke he flung himself into the wall behind him so hard that they swore they heard a crack. He didn't calm down, Evelyn had to tell them to go to bed since Jack was getting more worried with them there. No one slept that night.

"That was not a good night"

"No. It wasn't" Angel agreed.

Neither one of them noticed Jack's hand clench.

Turns out that love can actually conquer all, but only if you stick around long enough...

Jack sat on the roof outside his window. He was 14 now and his last name was Mercer. Evelyn had adopted him a few years back. Jack's hand shook as he lit his cigarette. He didn't want to think about Evelyn now, he didn't want to think at all. As a tear trailed down his cheek he wiped it away slowly. The ache in his chest was worse now. Bobby had known something was wrong and tried to get him talk when he picked him up from school, but he couldn't say anything, and when Bobby had left for an errand Jack had left for his own. And now here he was, smoking and wondering if he really had been such a bad kid to never deserve a break. Of course Jack knew the answer to that. He had been told he was worthless to many times to not believe it. But things had been going good now, he had his brothers and he had Evelyn. But even so he couldn't explain what he felt. No he couldn't take it. The feeling of despair was creeping over him again, as it had many times before, but this was different, this time he could feel it swallowing him whole. He hurt all over, and he was so tired. So tired of the pain. Tired of the nightmares that never stopped.

"Jack, if your out on that roof smoking again so help me..."

Bobby stuck his head out the window.

"Don't"

Bobby seemed to know something was wrong before Jack had gotten the word out, because suddenly he was standing on his knees on the roof too. Maybe he heard the tears in his voice, maybe he was pissed that Jack was smoking, or maybe he had caught sight of the gun laying in Jack's lap.

"Jack"

Bobby's voice was steady but Jack could see his hands trembling as he reached out for him, only to have Jack scoot further away.

"Jack. Give me the gun"

Jack knew what Bobby was doing. He spoke with a firm voice, because he knew that Jack responded to that. It was probably a sign from his abuse Jack figured. It was something Bobby had at times used to his advantage to stop Jack from doing what he called stupid shit. Not this time though, it wasn't going to work now.

"Please go back inside Bobby" he whispered.

"Talk to me Jack, what's happened? Someone do anything to you? You know you only have to tell me and I'll take care of it, you know I will" Bobby's voice was a little higher towards the end, showing his nerves and his panic that he had managed to hide so far.

"The fuck you doing out here you..."

Angel stopped and took in the sight before him in silence. Jack and Bobby was on their knees on the roof, Jack's face was covered in fresh tears and he was shaking slightly. Bobby looked calm, if you didn't know him as well as Angel did, to him he looked ready to spring, he was so tightly coiled. Then he saw the gun in Jack's lap and he knew.

"Jack..." Angel whispered not moving, afraid of making one wrong move.

"Angel go get Ma" Bobby's voice was firm.

"She went to the store"

Angel tried to swallow the lump in his throat, his voice was still a whisper. He saw Bobby's shoulders slump slightly but he never took his eyes off Jack. Just then Jerry came to stand beside Angel. He had been so caught up he never even heard him. Jerry didn't say anything as he took in the same sight Angel had.

"Please" Jack's voice was hoarse "Just leave"

Bobby shook his head sadly.

"That's not how this works Jack. Tell me what's wrong, I'm right here, you can trust me"

"Never, ever trust anyone" Jack repeated to himself.

"You know that's not true Jack. I remember the first time you told me you trusted me, do you remember?"

Jack nodded. He did.

"You told me that you knew you could trust me, and you were right. I have never let you down have I?"

Jack shook his head. He hadn't.

"Talk to me then"

It was quiet for several moments before Jack spoke, wondering how he was going to explain this feeling of despair, the darkness that seemed to be everywhere.

"It's just to much" He whispered "I know I was never a good boy but I thought, when I came here, you guys were so good, and Ma" he stopped himself, as if calling her Ma hurt to much right now "but it wont leave me alone, and I know now it never will"

His hand tightened on the gun but he didn't lift it. Bobby glanced down at it.

"Is it loaded Jack?"

"Hard to end it all otherwise" Jack's voice was shaking.

"We can help you Jack, we've all been where you are, none of us came from a loving family you know that, we know how it feels, maybe we haven't seen everything you have, and maybe we don't quite get it, but we know"

"You can't help me. It's way to late for that"

"We helped you before, you remember Jack, I know you do. Is it anything like that again?"

"No" Jack shook his head, the wind tussling his hair, making him look even younger than he was "it's just to hard, all of it, the dreams, the memories... it's to much, and I don't want it anymore, I don't want to be me anymore. I hate me"

Angel and Jerry would nevert admit it to anyone, and they didn't mention it to each other. But the whole time Bobby and Jack were talking, their hands were tightly clasped around each other.

"We love you Jack, we all do, me , Angel, Jerry and Ma"

Bobby's heart was pounding, the words straight from his heart, he had never been more honest than he was right now.

"Don't say that!" Jack sobbed, his tears running faster, his voice hoarse and his blue eyes full of pain.

"Why not Jackie? It's the truth" Bobby struggled to stay calm, he felt like he was about to snap, but that was not the way to handle Jack, especially not right now "you're my brother, I love you"

Jack stood up and Bobby did too, Angel and Jerry sucked in a breath. One bad step...

Jack threw his cigarette down and swayed slightly, the words ringing in his ears mixing with all those other words. Worthless. Weak. Unlovable. Liar. Stupid. Whore. Their voices was melting together in his mind, one was louder than the others and he heard the words as clear as he did that day... 'you like that huh? Of course you do, you're nothing but a whore, that's why your so good at sucking cock boy, you were born for it' the laughter rang in his ears and he grabbed his head as if he could stop it if he just pressed hard enough.

"Your not! Why do you even care about me? I'm not your brother, I'm just some stupid whore that turned up on your doorstep!" Jack yelled and choked back a sob.

Bobby growled. His hands were so tightly clasped into fists that his nails were tearing the skin, but he didn't feel it.

"Look at me Jack"

Jack looked at stars in the sky, it almost seemed like they were mocking him with their light. He let out a scream, a scream full of frustration, sadness and longing.

"Look at me Jack! Look at me!"

Jack met Bobby's eyes, tears streaming down his face, his eyes reflecting all the pain, all the hurt he had inside of him.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you're not my brother. Tell me I don't love you, that you don't love me, that you don't give a damn about anyone of us, can you do that Jack?"

He couldn't. He stood staring into Bobby's eyes, and in them he saw pain, and caring, and love. And tears. Bobby was crying. Bobby never cried. He let out a sob and took a step towards Bobby.

"I just want it to end"

His voice was so lost, so broken, that Bobby's heart clenched painfully.

"I know Jackie, but you have to be strong okay? I know you can be, and you have us by your side. Give me the gun Jack"

Jack hesitated but then slowly reached a trembling hand forward and Bobby gently grasped the gun, put the safety on and bent down to slide the gun to Angel and Jerry still leaning out of Jack's window. Angel caught it and he and Jerry exchanged a look of relief.

Bobby wrapped Jack up in a hug and Jack started sobbing harder.

"I'm sorry Bobby, I didn't mean it, I didn't mean it"

"Don't say sorry Jack, talk to me, you have to tell me when it gets to much, otherwise I can't help you, you have to tell me"

Bobby hugged him harder, the relief coursing through him.

"Don't scare me like that again, I thought my fucking heart was going to stop. Come on kid, let's get inside, take it easy, long way down too"

He steadied Jack when he stumbled as they made their way to the window. Jack looked up at him.

"You wouldn't let me fall"

Bobby's heart suddenly felt to big for his chest.

"No, I wouldn't"

As he helped Jack through the window he added "might drop you on your head though to knock some fucking sense into you"

"Bobby?"

Angel and Jerry's head whipped around to stare at Jack.

Well, it was really hard to write about some of what happened to Jack. I might go back and visit that time in his life in another flashback, I don't know yet. I think it's realistic to think that Jack's problems didn't vanish just because Evelyn found him, and that's why I decided to make his break down, and suicide attempt a few years after, when it just got to be to much. I really hope you like this chapter, if you feel disgusted and sad after reading it then I think I did it justice, and please let me know what you think. I want to add that we all know that horrible things happen everyday, and I think we should take the time to reflect on how we can help and make a difference for those who need it, no matter what their situation is. And if you are feeling depressed and having dark thoughts please, find help. You deserve to be happy, and it gets better. Thank you so much for reading.