A/N: Apologies for the long wait - the muse took a leave of absence for a while. I also had to get the scene right in my head before I could start writing it and that took me a while. Anyway, I hope ya'll enjoy it. Thank you once again for all the wonderful reviews and your patience!
Disclaimer: Don't own them, never will. Be still my heart. . .
Chapter 12 - I and Love and You
The dew shimmers in the early-morning sunlight, moistening the green grass of Central Park with millions of diamond drops. It's still early - barely past 7 - on a Sunday morning. The air is cool and crisp, the sky a pale blue. They walk silently beside each other, coffee cups in hand, minds racing to find the right words, the perfect words. Those bridge-building words that will lead them back to a middle ground, to a fresh starting place.
Onto the same page.
Kate chews on her lip and looks up from the sparkling dew drops and glances at her (friend? lover?) partner. He's staring off into space, a deep line creasing his forehead, his eyes solemn and his mouth set in a grim line.
He's got something on his mind, but is still trying to select the right words from his vocabulary, finding the right tone to roll it from his tongue. He wants it to be poetry, a beautiful prose that would wrap around her heart and never let go. His love for her. But words seem to fail him when it matters. He doesn't have a poem or an earth-shattering speech; only three words. He wants to say them, set them free, give his heart wings.
But fear keeps reigning him in. That nagging doubt that she doesn't-
"I guess we have a lot to talk about," Kate says quietly, her voice low and soft. He imagines this is what she would sound like in the mornings while whispering, smiling, into his ear after just waking up, a hand brushing tenderly through his hair. 'What she didn't do that morning' the bitter thought races through his mind.
He shakes it off and turns to look at her. "Uh, yeah," he says with a tight, lopsided smile. "I guess we do."
Kate spots a bench a few feet away and makes her way over to it, clutching the cup closer to her chest, her heart rate picking up at what lies ahead. Rick follows her, watching the way the breeze lifts a strand of hair away from her cheek and wisps it over her shoulder.
So beautiful.
They sit in silence for a few moments, watching as a lone jogger passes them on her morning run and an elderly man walks past them with a small Jack Russel on a leash. They seem like a couple just enjoying the morning, an early morning date after waking up next to each other. But they're not there yet; they're haven't reached their destination yet.
Kate takes a breath, her eyes on her fingers around the cup of coffee. "I'm sorry," she rasps, grief and sorrow choking the words out of her mouth. It sounds like ashes, her apology. It feels too insignificant, tastes sour on her tongue. But she has to get them out; she has to free herself from the crushing weight of missed opportunities and past mistakes.
Her words need to mend his heart.
Rick looks at her, his brow furrowing in surprise. He didn't expect her to get right to it, to set things in motion. Before he can say anything in return, she lifts wet, gleaming eyes to his. She has to swallow past the burning sensation in her throat and she has to blink away the sudden, hot tears threatening to fall.
"I'm sorry for hurting you, Rick."
He sucks in a breath, his chest suddenly feeling tight. He wants to reach out to her, wrap his hand around hers. He doesn't though because she has hurt him, she did break his heart.
But she is also the only one who can mend it.
"Kate-"
"No," she interrupts, lifting a hand to stop him. "J-just hear me out. Please." Her voice is soft, her tone awash in vulnerability. She is without her armor, her wall of denial. It is no longer a fortress to which she retreats, but a ruin; something that he conquered a long time ago. He is in her heart; his love carved on the pages of her life and he is never leaving because she is never letting him go again.
Kate tears her gaze away from his again, fixing it onto her fiddling fingers. He waits patiently for her to continue, watching her closely like always - the way her mouth contracts into a tight, tense line; the deep crease in her forehead; the dark, long lashes brushing rapidly against her skin; the movement of the muscle along her sculpted jaw.
He has to stop his hand from lifting up and caressing that tense jaw muscle. He has to stop himself from leaning in and pressing a kiss to the beauty mark on her cheek. He has to stop himself from wanting, hoping for too much.
Her eyes lift up, her gaze focused on the horizon. "I've made many mistakes, Castle," she says quietly, her eyes dancing back to his bright and brilliantly blue orbs. "And I have many regrets, but what I did. . ." She has to stop, take a breath, avert his all-seeing eyes and swallow past the overwhelming wave of emotion that threatens to choke the courage out of her. "-what I did to you. . ." Her eyes lock with his again; no walls are discernable, no armor visible anymore, nothing to protect her heart or deny his affection. ". . .was the worst mistake I have ever made."
Rick removes his eyes from hers and tries to shift away, but suddenly she grabs his hand, her touch almost desperate. Her eyes begging, praying, pleading. Sparkling and dark and just. . . intensely beautiful.
"I'm so sorry for pushing you away. For throwing. . . everything back in your face," she says, tears threatening to fall. She purses her lips and her brow furrows; her eyes never leaving his. "I was a coward. I let you go, I let you walk away. I don't deserve-"
"You're here now," he interrupts, placing an arm around her shoulders and pulling her against him. Rick presses his mouth against her temple, feeling his throat burn. "In then end, that's all that matters to me. That's all that counts," he says gruffly. He debates whether to say it, but the need to know, the desperate thirst for certainty pushes the words out of his mouth.
"J-just tell me you feel the same. Just tell me that you love me too, Kate. Please."
She is very still against him and he cannot see her face. He clutches her closer, closing his eyes, holding his breath. Deep down he knows the truth; he sees it as clear as day because it is carved on every part of her face, her being, her soul. Over and over again, like a mantra.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
Kate sits back to meet his gaze, her lips quirking into that secretive, almost shy smile that he adores so much. She raises a hand and brushes it through his hair, her eyes an ocean of calm, swimming in affection. His own mouth slowly curves into a closed-lip smile and allows hope to bloom in his heart.
"Yes," she answers simply in a murmur. "Isn't it obvious?"
He smiles softly, tenderly brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "I need to hear you say it."
Her mouth lifts again, trying to contain all the joy, all the fullness pouring out of her heart. Kate leans in and paints his smiling mouth with a delicate kiss, a promise of things to come.
"I love you." She kisses him again, ghosting her mouth over his cheek and up to his ear.
"I love you." Her lips like pilgrims against his jaw, traveling towards their final destination.
"I love you," she breathes against his lips again, invading him, a soft conquering with her pilgrim lips. He slides his mouth open under hers and latches onto her lower lip, lightly scraping it with his teeth before darting his tongue out to soothe the tender flesh. Kate moans quietly and shifts closer to him, a hand against the back of his neck, her tongue slipping past his lips and into his mouth; a hot, wet, delicious sanctuary. He winds an arm around her waist while a hand drifts up to cup her jaw. The kiss is a languid, intimate exploration that only two lovers could share.
A reunion, a healing, a restoration.
They are startled apart by the sudden laughter of nearby children. They're both smiling, beaming with happiness, their foreheads touching and their breathing shallow. Kate lets out a soft, light laugh sprinkled with joy and drops her head to his shoulder. Rick's smile widens as he presses one, two kisses against the crown of her head and hugs her closer. She lifts her head again to meet his eyes, both still smiling like lovestruck idiots.
"Wow," he exhales.
"Wow," she agrees.
"We just made out like two horny teenagers on a park bench for everyone to see," he says. "You know that right?"
Kate laughs, a full, rich, free sound that lets her beauty soar. He cannot help but lean in to kiss that smiling, joyful, utterly gorgeous woman.
"So what now, Castle?" She watches him from beneath her lashes, her lower lip (that he had in his mouth a few moments ago) lodged in between her teeth. There is a teasing, playful glint in her eyes.
"Now, my dear detective, we make this an unforgettable journey," he replies, suddenly standing and holding out a hand to her. "Starting with bear claws and coffee." She smiles and wraps her hand around his, lacing their fingers.
Kate grins at him, her eyes laughing. "Jeez, Castle, a walk in the park, making out like teenagers and now breakfast? Some people would call this a date."
He leers at her, bumping her hip with his, their tangled hands lodged between their bodies. He ducks his head, his mouth next to her ear, his breath hot against her skin. Kate swallows, feels her heart rate jumping.
"Oh, Kate, when I take you out on a date, you'd know it." He presses a kiss below her ear. "And it wouldn't include just making out like horny teenagers."
"Mm, really?" Kate murmurs, turning her head to face him, her eyes darting to his parted mouth.
His smile becomes predatory, his eyes darkening slightly. "You have no idea."
A/N: Well, this was probably the lightest chapter of this story so far. Now, I need your opinion - should I end it here and just write an epilogue? Or should I continue with this story? I have an idea for a sequel (involving an AU-retelling of the shooting and the secrets), but it's gonna be another angsty one.
Please review and tell me what you think. Thank you for all the reviews already.
Title of the chapter - an Avett Brothers' song, "I and Love and You."