Esme was waiting for us in the living room as Emmett and I entered the house, she had a worried look on her face, which softened as we walked in.
Alice had apparently filled her in on what was going on with Edward so now her total focus was on the fact that I had been left behind.
She came over and hugged me tight. She worries about me to much, not that I don't appreciate it, believe me I do.
I was really close to my real mother, especially when my father joined up as a medic it was just the two of us, my greatest resentment with this whole thing was leaving my mother, but I knew either way I would be leaving her, either way saying goodbye was impossible and either way, she would be forced to mourn her son.
Same thing that Esme was forced to do when she lost her own son a few days after he was born, which is one of the reasons why Esme is so protective of all of us.
When I first met her, Esme had been cautious around me, I think she was trying not to frighten me. She was careful not to move to quickly around me and went as slowly as possible to gain my trust.
She didn't give herself any physical contact with me for quite a while, she desperately wanted to hug and comfort me, but was worried about frightening me and I was desperate to be hugged and comforted, but couldn't figure out to ask.
I mean, after being turned into a vampire how does one ask to be hugged and comforted. It sounds ridicules right? Well it did back then too, maybe even more so than today.
Looking back now, her actions remind me of someone trying to help an injured or abused animal, the first thing that has to happen is prove to the animal that you're not a threat in anyway.
And now that I think about it, my body language probably showed just that, fear and mistrust, like a wounded animal.
Forget my body language. I WAS a wounded animal, after all, I had only been a vampire for less than two weeks and up until that point had only been around Carlisle and Edward, and suddenly I was thrown into a house with three stranger vampires, plus Edward and one of them was talking about finally having some fresh blood in the house…two guesses who THAT was.
Everything was happening way too fast for me; from nearly dying to being turned into a vampire, a creature I thought existed only in movie and story form like Nosfuratu or Dracula.
To drinking the blood of a rabbit after I had sworn that no blood of any form would ever pass my lips.
To watching Carlisle give my goodbye to my own mother who I could not speak to, who I would never see again; to finally being whisked out of London to the United States and into a house full of strangers, with all these new senses screaming at me as my body scrambled to understand and catch up with everything that had happened and would happen.
On top of all that I was also fighting my body's strong desire for blood. A thirst that was extremely powerful and demanding and very painful, I was still a newborn vampire and even my strong will against blood wasn't strong enough to overpower the strength inhabited within the instincts of a newborn.
I wanted human blood…though I was controlling it well; I was still kept on a pretty short leash until the threat of being a newborn vampire passed, heck the only time I was allowed out of the house was to hunt and that was with the others.
Not to mention, with being so confined and guarded I was edgy, insanely edgy. Every little noise had me on high alert. I was constantly expecting sirens to call and be forced to take cover.
The first couple of loud explosions and whatnot (usually from miles away and usually just miners blasting or trees being cut down, but noises we could easily hear) that had me jumping up anxiously in fear and had Emmett beside himself with laughter; until he realized that I truly expected Germans to bombard Harlequin with a blitzkrieg (even more so after the Japanese virtually destroyed Pearl Harbour and I and the rest of the family realized just how close the war had come).
I must have looked scared, I don't really remember how I felt when I first met Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie, fear was probably just one of many emotions I was feeling.
When Carlisle returned from Europe and explained my past especially about my mother to Esme, being cautious around me for my own sake went out the window. Coincidently, right after he told her, I discovered that the house was near a mine and that they regularly blasted inside.
I'll admit it, I freaked out, but Esme didn't hesitate to hold me and assure me that I was safe. I think it was then the protectiveness really kicked in and it has been that way since.
And once Emmett realized I was actually afraid, he stopped laughing and turned to being the protective big brother, trying to keep me occupied the best he could (one of Emmett's ideas of distraction was sports, and it was then I had my first introduction to baseball, a game I've gotten pretty good at, but I'd still like to take Emmett on in a game of cricket and whoop him.)
Nearly ten months made both Carlisle and Esme more comfortable with allowing me away from the house and around humans, still under supervision that is, the blood lust for human had slowly passed and my eye color had begun to change rapidly, but those ten months were nearly unbearable. Considering I was given the taste of the outside world my first Christmas with the Cullens when Carlisle and Esme took me to midnight mass, but even that was a huge risk, I was a newborn vampire who had only been that way for a month or so.
I was terrified of the monster that wanted to be released and I was also getting antsy about being cooped up and basically leashed when outside. I knew it was for my safety and the safety of others, but it got old real fast, I don't do well with being stuck somewhere.
Though I miss and always will miss my real mother, Esme is also my mother, and I could never imagine denying her love or pushing her away in any sense.
"Thank you Emmett, for going back for him," Esme said softly.
Emmett gave a nod
"Anytime," he replied, before looking over at me "just don't make it a habit kid, or I'll start charging you gas money,"
"I'll just take it out of your repair bill, next time you bust the transmission in the jeep taking it over that what it was not intended for. Need I remind you that while it is a jeep, it is NOT a tank!"
We exchanged a goofy glare and he headed up the stairs to the room he shares with Rosalie
"so Christian, how was school?"
I couldn't help but grin, as Esme let me out of her hug and led me over to the sofa; like I said she worries about me way to much and is extremely protective. It comes with the territory of being the youngest or as Edward and Emmett constantly reminds me "the baby" of the family.
She's also the only one who calls me by my full name on a regular basis. She rarely calls me Chris, but then again she's the only one (aside from Alice and Carlisle) who gets away with calling me Christian.
I think the only time Carlisle has called me Christian at least recently was when I got detention back in September, he usually only calls me it when he's serious about something.
"School was good," I replied "teachers over did it with the homework" I gestured to my bulging backpack at my feet, "would not have been fun running home with that suitcase," I finished laughing, Esme leaned over and kissed the top of my head "and don't forget you and Carlisle have that wonderful parent teacher conference next month." I finished with a grin, that was another reason to look forward to High School, no more parent teacher conferences.
Esme nodded
"I wrote it on the calendar," she replied winking "I certainly hope there wont be any negative comments Christian."
I thought it over
"Naw, just from Mr. Jones."
She sighed, but was going to ignore that one, at least for now, she knows my history teacher and I do not get along.
There are two Parent/Teacher meetings a year, one in October so parents can meet the teachers and the second one in February is like a progress report. Esme and Carlisle got the impression in October that Mr. Jones doesn't like me.
"By the way, your little friends have been making a racket all day, when was the last time you cleaned their cage?"
"Saturday morning," I answered, thinking back
"Well, you need to go visit with them. Rosalie is not very pleased with them. To be honest Christian, it sounded as if they were staging a revolt in your room."
I nodded "K"
Esme kissed my head again before I stood up and headed up the stairs towards my own room, on the third floor, a ways down the hall from Esme and Carlisle's room… but just before Edward's.
Though he has the best view in the whole house, mine isn't half bad either, with a partial view of the river, but a great view of the mountains. Originally, it was one big room, it took up nearly the entire south wing of the house on the third floor. Problem was, both Edward and I were calling claim on the room, my room was supposed to be the refurbished loft, but it was the view that caught my attention.
So to satisfy both of us, Carlisle worked out a comprise; put up a wall, readjust the glass window that we were already building around that side of the house, and bingo two new rooms where once there was one. It helps having a mother who is amazing at architecture and can rebuild or fix any kind of real estate no matter the condition and turn a death trap into a spectacular home. (that's not to say that our Forks house was a deathtrap when we moved back here, but it wasn't as big and spacious as it is now, it was after all, just a little farm house originally.)
Edward has the bigger room and technically the best view, but I got my mountains and that was all that really mattered to me.
It was one of the rare times Edward and I have ever argued, we usually get along better than that and staring at his closed door, knowing that he was on his way to Alaska worried me. Maybe it was time to get the details from Alice, but a loud squeak from inside my room distracted me for a moment.
I pushed my door open, threw my bag to the floor, and flipped my light switch on, brightening my small room; small in comparison to the other rooms in the house, but perfect size for me and my stuff, I don't need a lot of space I never have even when I was young, even when I was human, which is why Carlisle had no reservations about turning one room into two and giving me the smaller of the two.
Against the windows was a built in window seat, perfect for lying on with my IPOD and watching the moon rise over the mountains.
Next to the window, was my desk, lined with books and computer games, encasing my desktop computer and my small notebook computer, it was perfect for sitting with my feet up on the desk, keyboard in my lap, playing one of my many computer games, (it also had plenty of room to spread my books out to do my homework when I finally decided to work on it.)
On the opposite side of the room, situated next to one another was my bookcase, filled with my overflowing collection of books and my large collection movies, next to that sat my CD/Radio/IPOD dock, with my speakers attached in the four corners of my room…also attaching to the speakers, and fixed on the wall just across from the window was a 25 inch TV, hooked to a DVD player.
Across from that, next to the large window is a small cloth recliner. And next to the door stood a wooden table upon which sat a large wired cage.
I grinned wide and walked over to the cage. Smelling my presence in the room, two heads poked up from the bottom of the cage.
My buddies, my pet rats, Charlie and Chaplin; Charlie is a black rat with spots of white and brown splotched all over his body and black eyes (if you want a good image, he looks like a cow, at least markings wise), he's also the larger of the two.
Chaplin is mostly white with red eyes, he has two black spots on his back and one very noticeable black line across his nose, reminding me of Charlie Chaplin, who was my favorite actor when I was, well a kid.
I opened the cage and both rats happily climbed out and ran up my arms, before resting on my shoulders. Well Chaplin did, Charlie dove into the hood of my sweatshirt, curled up and went to sleep, that rat's favorite activity in the world is sleeping and eating.
"Goofball," I replied as I checked their cage, just as I suspected it was pretty clean, they're fairly clean rats and rarely do I have to clean their cage more than once every other week.
I'd probably have to clean it by next weekend, but their cage was clean, they had plenty of food, water…and…ok so the salt wheel was nearly gone; Chaplin loves salt wheels and usually goes through it pretty quick.
But he wasn't going to die from lack of salt, but it could definitely explain the racket Esme had mentioned, when Chaplin doesn't get his way, he throws a rat equivalent to a tantrum, basically banging his water bottle against the cage, and squeaking loudly.
As if to make amends for his behavior, Chaplin sniffed the outer edge of my ear, his whiskers twitching against my skin, I looked over at him and his red eyes stared back, he stood up on his hind legs and put his front paws on my nose, all this as if he was saying 'don't be mad, I was bored…you were gone for hours and hours. I'm sorry.'
I'll never understand why animals trust me. When humans instinctively try to stay away from us, and most animals do the same, around me animals seem comforted. It makes hunting a lot easier believe me, but it's also why a vampire has two pet rats, it sounds really ridiculous as I am constantly reminded by Jasper and Emmett on a daily basis.
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a veterinarian or at least work with animals. Though I don't think I really knew what a veterinarian was back then.
If I could have I would have had every animal known to man in my house (something my mother would not have allowed, in fact if she saw Charlie and Chaplin she'd probably throw a fit, she hated rodents of any kind) and since having a dog or a cat is not really practical in this house, especially since we could move at any time, something cage-able and more importantly portable was my next option.
Rosalie nearly bit my head off (not literally) when I suggested a snake, she wasn't all that thrilled about the rats either, but I told her it was either going to be one snake or two rats, and I think she went with the lesser of two evils, least in her mind and avoids my room at all cost.
Carlisle thinks that my love of animals as a kid may explain my strong connection with animals now and Esme thinks that my wanting a pet of some sort was my way of trying to hang onto that what was lost when Carlisle changed me, what was left my childhood, my human childhood.
Being stuck at fourteen forever has it's advantages, but there are quite a few drawbacks, unlike my siblings, my chances to be able to venture out on my own are extremely slim and very unlikely, I'll be luck to reach sophomore year of high school let alone graduate before people realize that I haven't changed physically since meeting me in 6h grade when we "moved" to Forks.
Jasper, Edward, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, all of them have graduated, a couple of times over, heck Edward holds two medical degrees, something that because of my physical age I will probably never be able to do. I lucked out with the two Bachelor degrees I do have, and the online masters I'm working on at the moment.
The chances are also very slim of my finding someone like Carlisle found Esme, Alice found Jasper, or Rose found Emmett.
Finding our kind frozen at my age is a very rare thing, I've personally have only met two who were pretty close to at least my physical age, Jane and her brother Alec of the Volturi, not exactly the two I want to be buddied up with, best mates with Alec and boyfriend to Jane, she's evil, pure and simple, and the scary thing is she loves me, just after meeting me one time, on the two times I have revisited Volterra, just to stay on Aro's good side, it has grown increasingly tough to leave because Jane literally throws a fit and it has only gotten worse. I haven't been back to Italy in thirty years because of that. I want to find my soul mate and marry her, don't get me wrong, but Jane is NOT my soul mate, if anything she's my stalker...
But that's the dilemma, seventy-nine years old, sixty-five years as a vampire and only one girl my age so far, I think I'll keeping holding out. Finding my match has been the goal of Esme, my sisters, and the Denali girls; they just haven't been successful.
Though that stuff bugs me, it's not something I stress over, especially the finding someone part, it will happen, I just have to be patient. All of it is just something I'm learning to get over and just take things the way they are.
I was just fixing the water-bottle when I heard a knock at my door, at the new noise, Charlie poked his nose out of my hood ready to investigate and Chaplin stood on hind legs sniffing the air, but when he recognized the scent, he joined Charlie in my hood, adding more weight to my already heavy hood.
Charlie is by no means small, he's the size of a guinea pig with a tail, so him plus Chaplin equal hood weighed down.
"Yeah?" I called, the door slowly opened and Jasper poked his head in, grinning like a jack-o-lantern "hey, what's up?"
"Ah Dr. Doolittle, made it home ok?" I growled a little; that would be the other downside to being good with animals; it earned me a nickname courtesy of Emmett, Dr. Doolittle. Him and Jasper are the only two that call me that, but it doesn't change the fact I don't appreciate it.
"What do you want Jasper," unable to push the annoyance out of my voice, he knows I hate being called Dr. Doolittle.
He softened his grin; unlike Emmett, Jasper knows when he's pushing to far and will stop; being able to manipulate the emotions of those around him gives him that advantage, but this time he wasn't trying to calm my annoyance, he was grinning his apology, like he couldn't help the Dr. Doolittle comments.
I felt the weight in my hood shift and one of the guys, presumably Charlie, the braver of the two; poke his head out over my shoulder.
Neither one of the rats, particularly enjoy my brothers' company, especially not Chaplin, all three of my brothers terrify him.
Chaplin however, loves Alice and on the rare occurrence they get loose from my room, nine times out of ten I find them in Alice's room or with Alice, riding contently on her shoulder, but apparently the one they both love is Rosalie…they love to climb out of my hood when I'm around Rosalie to say hi.
Oh yeah, she loves those experiences and has reached the point where she makes me swear that I had no rats on my person, before she will talk to me at home.
An example to this: she has never once called them by name. Whenever she is referring to them or yelling at me about them, she calls them Bubonic and Plague; and I gave up a long time ago trying to explain the real source of the black death to her, or trying to correct her by telling her their real names, she knows both fore-mentioned items, she just doesn't care.
Jasper reached out to my shoulder and held one finger to Charlie; I could feel his whiskers twitching madly and could hear his heart pounding so loud that it was purring in my ear, almost mocking me…enticing me…
I had learned to block out this sound, especially around the rats. The feeling that came with the sound, the sound of the heart pumping blood through the body, ignoring that sound was something I felt I needed to prefect before I would allow myself a pet so I wouldn't be faced with the instinct to drink from them.
I had done pretty well, but I could feel the instinct welling up inside, it happened every now and then, 'pecially when I haven't gone hunting in a while.
Being smaller than the others, I've got a shorter time frame 'tween hunting. I went hunting with Carlisle just about five or six days ago, with my small size and my choice of weaker prey that's a long time for my body.
This doesn't mean my will is weaker. Actually quite the contrary, compared to Jasper, Emmett and even Edward, but especially to Jasper, I'm immune, unlike my brothers I have never tasted human blood.
I still get what I just call hunger pains when I haven't hunted for a while and there have been a few times where the call of blood was really strong for me, but I'm better at resisting the urge to act on my instincts, especially when it comes to humans. And the couple of times I nearly gave in…I had my family there to stop me.
Animals aren't exactly the meal of choice for us, it's the lifestyle that we have chosen, but when you're really thirsty, nearly anything can be enticing.
I closed my eyes and focused on blocking out the sound, filling my ears with Black Sabbath's Iron Man and the famous beat that went with it.
I felt Charlie's whisker twitch against my skin as Jasper's finger reached him, I waited for the rat to dive back into my hood, but he didn't. He sat there and let Jasper pet him, I was proud of Charlie.
The pair of them had reached a new step in accepting one another, an ongoing process (then again, Jasper probably hadAlice's scent all over him making Charlie curious but I'll take what I can get).
"You ok Chris?"
I opened one eye then the other; I knew Jasper could see the thirst in my eyes, just like I could see his own willpower weakening in his own eyes.
Constantly being around humans is tough for Jasper since he was turned in a different lifestyle so to speak from the rest of us and for a while lived the lifestyle of a typical vampire, feeding on humans whenever it was convenient.
As much as I as admire Edward, Jasper doesn't realize just how much I look up to him as well.
I connected with Edward because I knew him first, he protected me and looked out for me and even gave into my pleading to see my mother one last time though he knew it was dangerous and since Emmett kind of terrified me for a while when I first met him, I kept myself close to Edward…clinging to my new big brother you might say.
AfterPearl Harborwas attacked, Emmett really took up looking out for me so I had the two of them.
ThenAliceand Jasper joined the family. I was kind of nervous around both of them for a while,Alicejust because she shows up on our front step asking where her and Jasper's room was and Jasper made me nervous because I could read the war on his face and on his body language. I knew what he had seen and what he was trying to hide from the family.
I could see his past all over him and though I didn't know much about the Southern Wars, at least not very much, I knew Jasper had been a part of something he was ashamed of and something that made him dangerous.
It took a while for a trust to be formed and it was only once I found out that we shared similar abilities and confronted him privately about what I had managed to profile on him, we began to trust each other slowly, and actually Jasper trusted me quicker than he did Edward I just wasn't all that quick to trust him…
Trust is an issue with me to begin with, I'm cautious in that regards and refuse to allow myself to trust someone and also to get close enough to them TO trust them. It takes time with me, heck it took Esme nearly eight years before I'd actually call her mum.
It wasn't until Edward instigated Jasper to the point where he actually attacked Edward and pinned him to a wall I saw another side of Jasper, a side that I hadn't expected to see.
He showed enough restraint not to kill my obnoxious brother and I was able to get more from that situation than I had gotten off of Jasper in the few weeks he and Alicehad been with us.
I think it was about then I truly started to trust Jasper, especially since Edward insisted that Jasper was dangerous and could not be trusted, especially aroundAlice.
And when I tried to convince Edward otherwise, he proclaimed I was being an idiot and that Jasper couldn't be profiled properly because he was unstable.
I think that was the first time Edward and I ever truly argued with each other and moved to the not speaking stage and I know he felt betrayed that I defended Jasper over him, but I didn't care then, and to this day I am not sorry for betraying him in that moment.
But Jasper, I mean just for what he's been through and to change all that even though it clearly is painful for him to ignore all the humans around us, he would do anything to keep Alice happy, even if it's not an easy thing and that right there is enough to admire.
Not to mention, he and I are the only ones in my family who experienced war first hand, while we were still human that is.
The first World War may have been raging during Edward's human life and he may have been getting close to the draft, but the US wasn't being bombed to pieces and it was perfectly safe and in fact from what I've read it was prospering quite well by being an ally to both Great Britain and her allies and to Germany and her allies.
Edward's only true experience with war is through Jasper and I's memories, him with the American Civil War and me with the bombing of Londonduring the Blitz. And as awful and destructive as the Blitz was (both in death tolls and physical/emotional damage), I've learned enough from Jasper and from my history books to know what I lived through was nothing compared to the horrors on the front lines that Jasper faced so in that respect Jasper experienced much more war than I did.
But even so we do have that in common, on top of our abilities to alter emotions (him with humans and vampires and me with animals) Jasper and I share that connection.
"Chris?" Jasper repeated his darkening golden eyes full of concern.
I nodded my answer and carefully I lifted Charlie from my shoulder and slipped him back into his cage.
Unfortunately I couldn't reach Chaplin, usually he comes out on his own when he knows he's going back into his house (going in means he gets a treat before I shut the door) but he wasn't moving from my hood either he was really scared or really content and since I didn't sense fear with him, the latter is more probable.
"Um…help?" I asked Jasper nodding towards my hood.
Jasper rolled his eyes
"He bites me you're in trouble,"
I shook my head
"He won't,"
We both know the reason…both rats understand that biting anyone in this house means there is a strong chance of getting bit back, not that their sharp teeth could do any damage to our skin anyways.
"Better not"
I felt Jasper reach into my hood and extract the shaking rat, he handed Chaplin to me and I slipped him into the cage, gave them their treats and shut the door.
"Thanks," I replied giving Jasper a grin, a silent way of letting him know I forgave him for the Doolittle comment.
"Alice wants to talk to you," he finally said.
I raised an eyebrow
"And she couldn't come up here to tell me that?" I asked confused, "it's not like she's afraid of Charlie and Chaplin." I paused, thinking things over. I remembered the LAST timeAlicehad sent Jasper to my room as a messenger, last weekend. I looked up at him suspiciously as I came to a conclusion, "oh…and if she thinks I'm going shopping with her again so I can act as pack mule or so she can buy me new clothes, she's got another thing coming!"
"No, she truly needs to talk to you and I also wanted to know if you wanted to go hunting with me, not far, in a little while."
I pulled off my hoodie and laid it neatly on my desk chair before looking back at him, I'd had a feeling that morning that Jasper would need to go hunting tonight. I could read it in his body language when we were heading out the door.
"Emmett too?" I asked casually.
Jasper shrugged
"Don't know I haven't asked him yet," I nodded "like I said in a little while, I know you wanted to work on the ATV first," I looked at him raising my eyebrow. "Alice," he simply said and I nodded thinking this over,
"yeah sure. I'll tell you what I'll even hunt…not track." Now Jasper laughed "what?"
"Right Chris…right…"
I grinned evilly
"Wanna bet?"
If there's one thing my brothers love and if there's one thing I can ALWAYS sucker them into it's a bet.
"Bet what exactly?"
I thought this over and nodded to myself
"I'll actually hunt, if I take down the first critter you guys stop calling me Dr. Doolittle for a month if one of you take one down 'fore me. I'll suffer with the Doolittle thing for two months with no complaints."
Jasper folded his arms and looked at me with a slight smirk on his face
"One month versus two months?" he replied thinking this over "kid has anyone ever told you that you are really bad at negotiating?" I shrugged and grinned a little
"Once or twice…" Jasper chuckled a little "and I'm not talkin' squirrels or rabbits, a deer or bigger if I can find it."
"Well I can't vouch for Emmett, but on my honor, if you win this bet of yours, I won't call you Dr. Doolittle for two months how's that?"
I thought that over, definitely sounded better than my conditions, only reason I said one month 'stead of two was 'cause I didn't think either one of them would handle two months of not calling me Dr. Doolittle, but maybe there was hope.
"Deal," I put my hand out and we shook on it.
"But first, go talk to Alice"
I nodded and reached back to the cage to grab Chaplin,
"K,"
"Uh…I'd leave the rodent." Jasper replied putting his hand on the cage door, we exchanged a look and exchanged a grin "Rosalie" we answered at the same time; carefully I re-latched the cage door and followed Jasper out of my room.
I heard a protesting squeak from one of the guys, I think they were sure I was going to see Rosalie and wanted to come, like I said, they love her, even if the feeling isn't mutual.
I hope everyone had a great New Years Eve. I would really like to know what everyone's thought is on this, I know I've had a number of hits, but no reviews yet, my main curiosity is chapter length. So I hope to see some review soon, constructive criticism or words of encouragement only please.