Chapter 9

"You are just too much. I Love you."

"I love you too Maura. Can I tell you something and you promise you won't get mad?"

"Jane you know I…" She looked into Jane's face and saw how important this was to her. "How about if I promise that even if I do get mad it won't make a difference in how I feel? Will that work?"

"I guess that will have to do. Now let me say this without interrupting ok? When I saw that look on your face after I shot Doyle I thought I'd lost you and things would never be the same. I could have told you Doyle shot me but the thought that went through my mind was what she doesn't know won't hurt her so I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to have to decide between me and Doyle because I thought you'd already made your decision so I said nothing." She looked up as Maura stood up and walked away from the bed. "I can't help it Maura, I thought you hated me, I'd just shot your father and you were a mess." Jane stopped talking and just watched Maura as she stood with her back to her. Shit now I really blew it. Maura took a deep breath before she turned back around to face Jane. Tears were streaming down her face and Jane could see she was just barely holding in her anger. "Ok you can get mad, it was wrong of me to ask you not to."

"How dare you!" Maura held nothing back. "How dare you think that my not knowing about this wouldn't hurt me?" She stopped speaking and took a deep breath. "As I was getting to know Doyle over the week I realized I could never like him because of what he does. There is a gentle side to him, I think you've seen it too, but all of that means nothing as long as he condones killing others for his benefit. You were right I let my emotions get the better of me when I saw you shoot him, I was very confused and you suffered because of my choice." At that moment the door swung open and in walked a smiling Dr. Cutter. "We're not finished with this yet." Maura whispered as she gave Jane a deep kiss then turned back to the doctor and smiled.

"Marking your territory Maura?" Jane whispered as she laughed behind her. "So Doc when can you spring me?"

"Well the nurse said you've got all the paperwork finished so I guess all we need is a wheelchair. Any questions?"

"Yeah when can my girlfriend and I have sex?" She said this laughing as she pulled Maura against her.

"Do you think you can make it home?" He smiled.

"We don't have to wait or anything?"

"Well I wouldn't recommend anything too physical but you have to use common sense." He turned to Maura. "I'm not sure about her but can I count on you to make sure she doesn't over do it?"

Maura saw the sincerity in his eyes. "Yes Doctor Cutter I will do everything in my power to make sure she doesn't over do it." She turned back to Jane and winked. They all turned as Jackie entered the room with a wheelchair. "Let's go Jane." Maura walked beside the wheelchair with her hand on Jane's shoulder. When they reached the front entrance she knelt down next to Jane. "I'm going to go get the car, promise me you'll stay here and wait for me."

"I promise I will be here feeling like a perfectly capable fool sitting in a wheelchair waiting for her girlfriend." She crossed her heart like she'd done as a kid.

"I'll be right back." Maura turned and ran towards her car giving Jane a magnificent view of her tight gluteus maximus in one of her usual tight skirts.

"Damn I'm a lucky girl." Jane couldn't wipe the silly grin off of her face. She was still smiling as Maura pulled her Lexus up to the front entrance. She stood up slowly and started walking towards the car.

"Sit back down until I can help you." Maura yelled as she opened the driver's door and ran around the car. Jane just stood there and waited for Maura to open the passenger door. She would concede on that point knowing she was healthy enough to lean down and open the door but knowing Maura wanted to do it. She felt Maura's hand on her back as she walked towards the car and it caused shivers down her spine. Maura waited until Jane was comfortable then shut the door and ran back around to the driver's side. Maura turned to Jane as she fastened her seatbelt. "Are you ok?"

"Yes Maura I am fine." Jane smiled back at Maura.

"That wig makes you look just like you did before."

"Yeah it does, thanks again for what you did it makes me feel almost normal. It'll grow back, not soon enough but it will grow back." Jane leaned over and kissed Maura when they hit a stop light. "It feels nice to be able to do that whenever I want to now instead of just wishing I could."

"Yes it does doesn't it? I'm so glad it doesn't bother you for people to know about us."

"Why should it, I would be proud to go anywhere with you on my arm. How could I not. You are an incredibly gorgeous woman with a big heart and you have chosen me as your partner and I want the world to know how lucky I am."

"You are a softy at heart aren't you Jane Rizzoli?" She looked over at Jane and saw the mock threatening look. "I promise not to tell anyone. I'm just glad I get to see this side of you."

"Can you drive a little faster?"

Maura looked down at the speedometer then glanced quickly at Jane. The smoldering look in her eyes almost caused Maura to run off the road. "Are we impatient?" Jane nodded vigorously. "I'm already going over the speed limit and I don't think it would look good for the chief medical examiner and a Boston detective to get a speeding ticket because they can't wait to get their hands on each other. We're almost there so stop fidgeting."

Jane reached over and tucked a strand of hair behind Maura's ear. "I know sweetie, it's just that it's been so long since I've wanted to make love to you, it's so hard to keep my hands off of you." She was running her fingers back and forth along Maura's neck and smiled when she saw her shiver. "I want to know what it feels like to lay next to with no barriers between us, just skin on skin." He voice dropped at notch at the thought. "I need to feel you writhing beneath me and hear you call my name as your climax takes over your body and you are helpless to resist it." Jane leaned over and replaced her fingers with her lips. "I love the way you always smell, some day's its vanilla like today, and others there's a hint of Jasmine, but I like both."

"Jane you have to stop. I'm having problems concentrating on getting us home in one piece. Don't get me wrong, what you are doing feels wonderful but if you want to make love tonight you'd better sit back and behave or we are going to crash."

Jane laughed but sat back in the passenger seat. "I guess you're right, as usual. Just drive and get us home."

"Well if you had behaved yourself we might have been home already." Maura laughed as she turned down the street where she lived. She felt an excitement she had never felt before with anyone she had ever brought home with her. She knew it was because she felt Jane was special and they very well may be starting something that could last a lifetime or destroy a beautiful friendship. She knew for her that Jane was the one for her, she knew it from the beginning but she wasn't sure if Jane felt the same way. She thought she did but she couldn't be sure. That is a conversation that will have to wait. She pulled up and waited for the garage door to open, she pulled into the garage and turned the car off. She turned to Jane and tried to smile but when she turned and once again saw the look of need mixed with fear on Jane's face the smile faded. "Let's go inside." She whispered to Jane. She walked around to Jane's side of the car to help her out and placed her arm around Jane's waist to help her out of the car. She knew Jane probably didn't need the help but she'd take any excuse to get close to her right now. Jane allowed Maura to help her out of the car and she wrapped her arm around Maura's waist as they headed into the house. Maura helped her over to the couch and slowly lowered her into the cushions. "Would you like some juice or water to drink? No beer for a couple of days or until you're done with the pain meds."

"I'll just have some water ok?" Jane watched as she hurried into the kitchen and wondered if Maura was a nervous as she was. She'd never been nervous when it came to making love with anyone so why was she so nervous now? She knew it was because this was not a one night stand and that Maura was very important to her. She hoped they had a future together and she was sure Maura felt the same way but she'd never made love to a woman before, what if she screwed it up.

Maura stood in the doorway and watched the emotions flit across Jane's face and wondered what she was thinking about. She set the glasses of water on the coffee table in front of them and sat down next to Jane. She left a little space between them because she didn't want to spook Jane. "Are you ok Jane?" Maura whispered.

Jane broke from her musings and turned towards Maura and smiled a small smile. "Yeah I'm fine. I little scared but I think it'll be ok."

"What are you afraid of?" Maura reached over and took Jane's hand.

Jane turned her body so that she was facing Maura. "I'm afraid I won't be good enough for you, and I won't be able to please you. I've never had good luck with relationships, you know that, but this…" she gestured between the two of them. "This is too important to not try." She pulled Maura towards her and gave her a quick kiss. "Can we just sit here for a few minutes?" Maura leaned in and rested her head on Jane's shoulder. "I remember our movie nights and we'd snuggle together on the couch eating popcorn and watching movies and I thought those were some of the best nights I've had in a long time. I also slept better when you were there with me, I didn't dream as much."

"I loved those nights myself because you were so relaxed and each time I felt we got closer and closer. I was hoping to get under your skin so you couldn't live without me. How did I do?" Maura lifted her head so she could see Jane's face.

"Oh you definitely got under my skin and wormed your way into my heart. I hope you know this is not a one night thing right? I cannot imagine my life without you in it, whether it be as a lover or a friend, hopefully as a lover but I can't live without you." Jane's voice got very quiet hoping she hadn't said too much.

Maura sat up then moved one leg so that it was on the other side of Jane's hips and she was straddling her. She reached up and gently took Jane's face between her hands. She spoke in a soft voice. "Jane Rizzoli I love you. I want to make love to you but if you are not ready I can wait. I've waited years, what's a few more days. If you don't want to be lovers that's fine too."

"What are you talking about Maura, I haven't changed my mind. I want you know as much as I've ever wanted you, more now that you're sitting on my lap like that." Maura smiled down at Jane and wiggled her butt making Jane moan. She leaned down to kiss Jane with as much passion as she could to show her how badly she wanted her. When Jane felt Maura's tongue asking for permission she gladly open her lips to grant access. The kiss quickly stole the breath from both women and they had to pull apart to draw in more air. "Damn Maura where the hell did you learn to kiss like that?"

"It's all in who you are kissing. I never felt anything like this with anyone else I've ever been with, I want you so bad Jane and I don't want to wait any longer. I've never been with a woman before and I don't know what I'm doing either so maybe we will just have to learn together. I'm willing to try, how about you?"

"If you don't stop wiggling that cute ass of yours I'm going to take you right here and now and I don't want our first time to be on a couch. Let's move to the bedroom ok?" Maura stood up, took Jane's hand and headed for her bedroom. Jane had stayed at Maura's house many times before but always in the guest room so she had never seen Maura's bedroom so when they walked through the door she stopped dear in her tracks. "Damn Maura this room is bigger than my whole apartment."

"Not quite Jane but close." She said it to state a fact not to boast. "Over in the corner is my Jacuzzi which is where I spend my "me" time pampering myself. The bathroom is through that door and that is my closet."

Jane couldn't resist a look. She opened the door to the closet and once again could only stand and stare. "Holy shit Maura your closet is bigger than my bedroom." She looked at row after row of shoes on shelves than looked at the dresses all hanging according to color. "Are your underwear lined up by color too?"

"Of course, why wouldn't they be?" Maura answered as if Jane was crazy for thinking they wouldn't be.

Jane took a second to think about her underwear drawer and how she usually rooter around until she found a bra and panties that matched as close as possible. Then a thought occurred to her and she swung around towards Maura. "You brought me underwear didn't you?" Maura smiled and nodded. "Which means you had to go through my underwear drawer didn't you?" With the same smile on her face Maura once again nodded. "Now I am embarrassed. You have a room like this just for your clothes and underwear and you had to dig through my dresser to find underwear for me."

"Jane, we come from two different backgrounds. Clothes have been an integral part of my life, you've met my mother, clothes are everything. In order for me to keep up with the changes I have to have a place to put everything. You come from a very comfortable lifestyle, you are wear a pair of jeans like I would wear Prada, and might I say you fill those jeans out very nicely. In your job you would never be able to dress in any way but the way you do and as much as I love to see you in a dress it would never do in your line of work. And your underwear needs to be practical also. Victoria's Secret would probably not hold up while you are chasing someone down the street."