It was a Monday when my lover told me

"Never pay the Reaper with love only"

What could i say to you except "I love you"

and "I'd give my life for yours"

-Lucky; Bif Naked

CHAPTER 7

SCORPIUS MALFOY

I don't know what was going on between me and Rose. Not really anyway. I don't think we were dating. Malfoys don't have steady girlfriends. I was not going to have one, not yet anyway. Adrian thought I was being stupid. Actually, I think the words he used were "fucking clueless bastard". We'd had a bit of an argument about it, to be honest. Not a proper one, and it wasn't really an argument, more just him telling me I was a dickhead and me protesting.

"You're being ridiculous." He spoke bluntly when I walked into the room.

"What's with the sweet talk?" I grinned, but he didn't smile back.

"You're acting like a complete douchebag. I personally don't know why Rose bothers with you if this is how you treat her."

"What? I haven't done anything!"

"Exactly." He stated simply.

"I would never hurt Rose. And I wouldn't allow anyone else to either." I spoke dangerously as I pictured Dominique. She's lucky I didn't strangle her after she punched Rose, but Rose had stopped me from doing anything.

"That's not what I meant and you know it. You like her, you kiss her, you go on and on about her, you spend most of your days with her, and yet you still won't admit she's your girlfriend? Be a man and ask her out." He spoke the words flatly, but I could see the anger in his eyes. I knew he cared about Little Potter, and she cared about Rose, so he felt it was his responsibility to get me and her together properly. Except I wasn't ready for that.

"I don't want to ask her out."

"Bullshit."

"I don't want to ask her out. I like her; you know I do, but not enough."

"Not enough to risk your Malfoy reputation?"

"That's not what I meant."

"Bullshit." He repeated, "You've got some weird thing about being your dad. Except here's the thing: you're not. I see you waste your time with loads of girls that don't mean anything to you, and I guess that's fine because they're not right for you anyway, but you don't do it for the fun. You do it because you think it's what your father would've done. You've got some deluded fantasy where you have to be exactly like him, or turn out exactly how he planned. That's never going to happen, and you know that already because you're in love with Rose. You've got to understand that you're not him, you're never going to be him, and you shouldn't need to be him. Grow a pair, and ask her the fuck out." That wasn't true. I wouldn't let him think that it was true.

"I don't 'need' to be my father. I'm already better." I attempted a stab at my usual cockiness, but his words had thrown me. I didn't want to be my father. Everyone already did a double-take when they saw me, thinking they'd seen the younger Draco Malfoy. I knew I looked the same as he did at my age – although I think I was taller – but I didn't want to further that likeness.

"Then ask her out."

"No." I said bluntly, and I saw a flicker of annoyance cross his face. Adrian did not like being told 'no'.

"You're being injudicious. You can't argue with vocabulary like that." He joked, and I knew he was trying to lighten the mood. He didn't like it when we argued, and nor did I. We were too close for arguments. Hey, we were softies at heart.

He'd left shortly after that, not because of the argument, but because he was meeting Little Potter. Before leaving, he'd rummaged around his trunk for something. I hadn't paid much attention to what it was but he walked past me smelling strongly of aftershave.

I wasn't sure I wanted to know all the details when he strolled back in. I noticed his hair was more ruffled now than it was when he'd left. I smiled to myself, unnoticed by Adrian. He'd just begun to change out of his clothes when he started speaking. He kept his back firmly turned towards me.

"I stand by what I said before." He said.

"I know you do."

"But I don't want you to be mad at me for it."

"I'm not."

"Good."

And that was the end of that. It almost made me laugh, because he'd been so annoyed or angry, even passionate about the topic before, and now we were both speaking stiffly. I scolded myself for speaking to him in such a cold way, and, in an attempt to redeem myself, I brought up Little Potter.

"Have fun on your little make-out session?" I asked, grinning. Adrian turned around to look at me, smiling that funny lopsided smile he had whenever Little Potter was mentioned.

"Yes actually, you'd be surprised at how… adept she is at pleasing me." He winked, a suggestive tone to his voice.

"Nice… I really want to know the details." I said sarcastically, jokingly grimacing. We both laughed.

"Believe me, if you did you'd be jealous." He grinned, taking pleasure in my, er, willingness to hear every dirty little detail.

"Tell me you didn't fuck her? Because, Adrian, that should be considered paedophilia." He laughed at my continual grimaces, and shook his head.

"Nah, I don't want to. Don't think she'd let it get that far anyway."

"Yeah, I get it." And truthfully, I did. I felt the same about Rose, not because I didn't want her, but because I knew it'd be better to wait with her. I don't know what it was, but something told me I should hold off with Rose, until she was ready. I wouldn't pressure her into that. Adrian looked at me knowingly for a moment, and then returned to his bed, staring at nothing in particular.

We spent the rest of the night in silence, both of us knowing where the other's thoughts were. It got to quarter to eleven when I remembered I'd promised to meet Rose on the hour. I got that familiar funny feeling in my stomach – I still hadn't figured out what that was – but I shrugged it off, it'd become easy to ignore.

I wandered down to our meeting spot, knowing I wouldn't run into Filch. He was somewhere on the third floor, I think. I was meeting Rose in the library; it'd somewhat become our sanctuary. Rose loved it there, and seeing her eyes light up was what made up my world. Her eyes were what I loved most about her; so deep I could lose myself in them, so brown it was like chocolate, so sparkling it was like looking at the stars. Her eyes kept me sane.

I lost myself in my thoughts – thinking about her, her eyes, her scent, her hair, her fair skin, her freckles, the way she kissed me, the way she trusted me, the way she had me in love. And I was. I knew I loved her. I loved her with every fibre of my being, and sometimes I wondered how I knew her for five years before realising it. I loved her so much it sometimes hurt, and it was true what I'd said to Adrian. I would never hurt her, and I would never let anyone else hurt her. It amazed me how beautiful she still looked when snuggled up in a hoodie and jeans, or with a black eye. No, she wasn't beautiful. She surpassed beautiful. There are no words to accurately describe her. She was everything. She was everything to me.

I hadn't noticed Rose strolling towards me; I was so engrossed in my thoughts. She was only a few feet away from me when I saw her. She looked as stunning as usual, and the bruise around her eye was healing quickly. As I studied it, she saw me looking and quickly hid that side of her face. I gently tipped her head back towards me and gave her a soft kiss on her lovely pink lips.

"You're beautiful, even with that. There's nothing bad enough in this world that would ever change that." I whispered to her, my face only an inch away from hers. A smile crept across her face, and her eyes shone. I suddenly realised we were acting like boyfriend and girlfriend, and I wasn't sure whether I liked that or not. I loved Rose, I truly did. She was my entire world. But I wasn't ready to be in a steady relationship with someone, even if I did love her. Malfoys didn't have relationships. They had marriages, but they were rarely filled with love. I knew for certain that my grandfather didn't love my grandmother. She loved him, she would do anything for him, but he regarded her as a servant, an object. Something he got bored of easily. That's what I hated most. The thought of being used like that, loving someone and not having them love me back. It scared me.

"You always know the right things to say." Rose broke my thoughts, smiling up at me with tender gaze. Her arms were wrapped around my neck while mine were wrapped firmly around her waist. I never wanted to let go of her. I met her eyes, and there was a moment when we both just stood with each other in silence. I noted then that in that moment, yes, I wanted to kiss her, but mostly I just wanted to hold her. I wanted to hold her close to me and never let her go. I wanted to cling to her; I wanted to have her tightly in my grasp. I didn't want to be away from her. I loved Rose, more than anything else in the entire world.

"It helps that the person who gave it to you is a complete bitch." I said, breaking the silence. I saw her smile–and then I saw her falter. I saw her registering what I said. I saw the anger behind her eyes.

"That's my cousin! You can't just say that kind of thing about her!" I knew she would've yelled if we were allowed to be there.

"What do you mean? Of course I can! She gave you a black eye, Rose!" I protested, and then I suddenly realised my mistake. She knew I didn't like Dominique – she knew it well. But it didn't mean Rose had stopped caring about her, or that she wouldn't defend her. I didn't think about this, and it hurt to see that much anger in her sweet face.

"That doesn't matter! She's still my family, and you can't say that stuff about her!" I saw the fire in Rose's eyes, saw the anger, and I felt more ashamed of myself than I ever had.

"I'm sorry, Rose; I didn't mean to upset you, honestly. I didn't think. I'm sorry." I grovelled, looking her straight in the eyes. The anger had not lessened, and it pained me.

"Yeah, well, sorry won't cut it. That's my family. You're right though, Scorpius, you didn't think. And you don't think. Do you realise how much it hurts me to hear you say this stuff?" She demanded of me. I couldn't help but think she was overreacting: I'd apologised, hadn't I? I immediately scolded myself for thinking that, Dominique was just a sensitive subject with her. I knew this. She didn't know whether to hate her or to love her.

"Rose, I… I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say." I stood there, hearing the plea in my voice.

"I guess its best you don't say anything then." Her voice was calm and steady, but her eyes still raged. She looked at me one last lingering second, and then she turned and walked away. I felt like a heavy weight was sitting on my chest. It was there all the way back to the common room, and into the dormitory. I didn't acknowledge Adrian, and he knew me well enough to stay clear of me when my face was like this. It wasn't anger. It was misery. Honestly, I'd have preferred anger. With anger you get a powerful drive, but with misery you feel dejected. You feel desolated. And that's exactly how I felt. I climbed into bed, feeling like I'd lost something. My chest ached, and I couldn't stop thinking about that last look she gave me. So full of rage, full of anger, but also of depression. To see Rose's eyes – Rose's eyes that entranced me, Rose's eyes that enchanted me, Rose's eyes that I loved so much – look at me that way… I felt aimless, I felt scattered. I felt abandoned and helpless, and all I could think was how much I needed her right now. I needed to touch her, hold her so she stayed real, to reach out to her so she wouldn't leave. I couldn't even cry.

Malfoys didn't cry.

AUTHOR'S NOTE

I know Rose is overreacting, she's starting to annoy me actually. I know, it's my story; I could change it. but that's the way this Rose would react. hence the annoyingness.

Sorry it's taken me so long to update, busy busy busy! I'm currently writing chapter 8, so that should be done soon. I know it's weird that I'm writing chapter 8 when i've only just uploaded chapter 7, but I had ideas. I'M EMBRACING MY CREATIVITY! hahaha;)

I know this chapter looks short, but it was goddamn 5 pages on word. It made my hand acheeeeeeee-.-
don't be too hard on me, i know it's full of Scorpius' feelings and stuff, but that's done for a reason. you see how much he loves Rose, how much he just wants to be with her. you see a bit of the Adrian/Lily storyline deepening too, and I think they're my solid couple in this. We'll see...

thanks guys!

beccasophX

CHAPTER 8 SPOILER:

"You're not going with Scorpius?" Lily asked, as we traipsed around Hogsmeade in search of dresses. "Did you guys have a fight or something?" I felt the tears brimming my eyes as I recalled our argument. I felt so stupid! It was over nothing, I knew he didn't like Dominique, why did this change anything? I wanted to go and make up, but I felt him avoiding me. I knew when I was looking at him that he knew I was, and I could always sense a mental battle in his head deciding whether to look back at me or to ignore me. The latter always won out.

"Yes," My shoulders slumped and I immediately felt bad. She was so excited about Adrian taking her that I felt horrible for putting a damper on her mood. "It's probably for the best anyway, with Albus and Dominique..." Her face fell slightly, but it soon turned into a hard resolve. She was a fierce fourteen year old, I thought absent-mindedly.

"Screw Albus." Lily spoke through her clenched teeth. I'd forgotten about their argument, and I mentally chastised myself for bringing him up. "We'll find you something gorgeous to wear anyway, and then Scorpius will be jealous out of his mind. I may even get Adrian to tell him that you're thinking of dating someone else. Maybe that'll wake him up and then he'll realise that you should be with him, and he should ask you out already." She got that happy vibe again after thinking about Adrian. I'd nodded, but I couldn't help but feel horrible. Lily thought this was all his fault, when really it was all mine. I ruined everything.