Chapter 10

"Shoot…I am begging you to shoot me!" Gaius (no relation) Baltar

"Shoot him now! Shoot him now!" – Daffy Duck

The Present - The Galactica

Starbuck enjoyed the routine patrols as it gave him the feeling of freedom. He knew it was temporary, even illusionary, but at least he wasn't restricted to the same interior of the same ship day after day. He didn't know how the civilians coped with it. Even before the Destruction, he had heard of people forced into close quarters for long periods had developing a kind of madness.

As his thoughts drifted, he scanned his instruments and the visual space around him. Apollo's viper was off to one side keeping pace with his. He wondered just how much Apollo knew regarding yesterday's events. Cassie had informed him of the confrontation between Adama and Baltar. It all sounded like one of those sordid serial dramas that the IFB ran, dramas with storylines that seemed completely unreal until the bizarreness of real life proved otherwise.

He wondered how much Apollo knew. Had Adama confided in his son? Had Athena said anything to her brother? Now that Starbuck mulled over things, he realized that there had been a certain distance between Apollo and Athena. He had previously dismissed it as due to the differences in age and career paths, but now he wasn't so sure.

Starbuck knew that Apollo was fiercely loyal and protective of his father, more so since the Destruction. Apollo had displayed almost irrational anger when faced with the Council's or almost anyone's questioning of his father's authority or command of the fleet. Did he feel that his own sister was a threat to Adama's position?

That didn't seem possible as Athena had remained silent for nearly a yahren, quietly supporting her father and providing a sense of stability and comfort to him since the loss of Siress Ila. It was only now that Starbuck truly understood and recognized how vital Ila's support had been in maintaining her husband and family. Athena was trying to compensate, to provide that support to her father, even though it came at a cost to herself. While Adama's leadership and unswerving belief sustained the fleet, it was Athena who was making it possible for him to deal with the inhuman responsibility.

And now this precarious balance was breaking down simply because Athena had been placed in a position where her loyalties conflicted and could not be reconciled.

Starbuck knew how easy it had been to defer such a situation. He had made excuses to Athena before the Destruction to avoid dealing with his own conflicts. He did care for her, but as he had told Cassie, as something like a sister and he was afraid of ruining that comfort of having a family that accepted him with all his flaws if a romance with her had failed.

He had to admit to himself though that because Athena was so available to him, the excitement, the challenge, and the fun of courting a woman wouldn't have been present in a romantic relationship. It was the game, and the gamble, that motivated him. It was the thrill of beating the odds and the challenge of winning the prize. A sure bet was boring.

And now he realized that Adama had tried to motivate him with the challenge of competition when he had asked him to visit Athena on Caprica and distract her from Baltar. It hadn't worked because even then he knew Athena would have committed to him that night if he had asked, and would not have given Baltar a second thought.

Baltar hadn't won Athena from him; he had folded his hand before even really looking at what cards he had been dealt.

"Frak," Starbuck muttered, hitting the cockpit window with his hand.

"What's wrong?" Apollo's voice came over the comline.

"Nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing."

"Trust me. It was nothing. I was just thinking about a losing hand that I could have won." Starbuck forced himself to project an air of unconcerned cheerfulness.

"Athena?"

"What makes you say that?" Starbuck asked, sensing something else. Had Adama said something to Apollo?

"I thought maybe you and Cassie were having problems. She asked me about your relationship with Athena before the Destruction. Are you and Athena…?"

"Hardly." Starbuck gave a short laugh. "She's taken." As soon as he said it, he knew he shouldn't have. There was a long silence. Starbuck wondered just how serious Athena had been about the threat she had made earlier.

"Who is it?" Apollo asked in a carefully neutral tone.

"Don't you know?" Starbuck responded as breezily as he could.

"No. But apparently you do…."

"Er…I'm not sure. Why don't you ask her?"

"Because I'm asking you," Apollo said, rage creeping into his voice. "It's him, isn't it?"

"Him? Him who?" Starbuck knew he was closed to babbling, but he wasn't going to say the name.

"The him my father had you try to distract Athena from on Caprica."

"Oh…him…uh…." Starbuck was seeking for something to say when he saw Apollo's viper veer off and change direction to return to the Galactica. He grabbed his own controls and followed. "Apollo, don't. It won't help matters," Starbuck said, desperate to prevent things from getting worse.

"This needs to be settled once and for all." Apollo sounded determined. Starbuck briefly considered if he ought to try to disable Apollo's viper but then wondered about his own sanity.

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"I missed dancing with you," Athena said to Baltar. At her father's insistence, she had spent the previous night resting in one of the small private quarters normally reserved for visitors to the Galactica.

"I think I can manage that," he sat up in the bed, "if you don't mind something slow. You'll have to excuse my attire." He referred to the plain, white medical gown.

"It's not really too different from your Councilor's robe." Athena assisted him as he carefully placed his feet on the floor and stood, a bit unsteadily. "Are you going to make it?"

"I think so, just some momentary dizziness." Baltar smiled. "Your presence always makes me a bit giddy."

"Is that what happened last time?"

"No, I was desperate to explain to you what happened. I really don't care what others think, but I didn't want you to think of me that way." He rested one hand on her waist and took her hand in the other. "Although I don't mind falling for you, it is hard on the knees." He gently started the familiar steps that they had done so long ago together and once again Athena felt that unspoken connection with him as she followed.

"Don't leave again," Athena said.

"I'd really be more trouble to you than I'm worth." Baltar shook his head. "I can't let you suffer because of me."

"So you want me to suffer alone? Without you?"

"I really don't want to cause you any misery at all."

"It's too late for that," she stated.

"And that I will always regret. I wish I could have prevented it, but things went so wrong."

"I know."

"And that alone must have been a terrible nightmare for you."

"At least it's a nightmare we share." She rested her head on his shoulder. "With you, I don't think I'm going crazy."

"Is that why your father is fleeing?"

"What?" Shocked, she looked up at him.

"He must also agonize over the Destruction of the Colonies." He considered that line of thought.

"He's not a coward –" Athena started to protest.

"I'm not suggesting that and I'm not condemning his decision. Someone had to do it," Baltar reassured her. The antagonistic attitude he usually displayed when he mentioned her father was absent. "I'm just trying to understand his decision."

"He felt he couldn't defend what remained. That the best chance of survival was to seek help elsewhere."

"And he may be right," he agreed.

"You always seemed so opposed to him," Athena said, confused by his willingness to concede to Adama's position.

"Old habits are hard to break." Baltar grinned and Athena saw some of the sparkle return to his dark eyes. "Adama and I may have seemed eternally at odds while on the Council but I think we both needed it to be that way."

"But you're not on the Council anymore."

"Actually…I don't think my term of office has expired and I'm sure no one has bothered to implement the required protocols to remove me from the position." Baltar laughed and leaned a little closer to her, his voice dropping to that familiar conspiratorial level. "And their little trial or condemnation or whatever they called it was a joke."

"You can't mean it!" Athena gasped, nevertheless visualizing the scenario he was outlining.

"No, I don't," he said gleefully. "But it would have been fun to see the expressions on their faces, now, wouldn't it?"

"To say the very least," Athena agreed, smiling.

"Ah, that's better. Your smile always made life that much better for me."

"Really? Then what did this do?" Athena kissed him. Baltar stopped in mid-step as she pressed her body against his. She heard and felt his breath catch.

"Made me thank the Lords for allowing me to know you," he said hoarsely.

"That's all?" She gave him a flirtatious look.

"No…but do you think we ought to –"

"I remember something my husband once said: it would be foolish not to take what enjoyment you can out of life," she interrupted and again kissed him, lingering this time.

"Athena, what if your father walks in?" he asked, glancing nervously at the doorway.

"He can watch."

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At the med-tech's station, Cassiopeia looked up from the medical records she was updating when she heard laughter from one of the patient's rooms behind her. While she hadn't been able to make out words, the rhythm and the tone of the conversation had given her a good idea of what was going on.

She heard other voices at the main entrance. The urgency in them made her stand and walk towards them.

"Apollo, don't," Starbuck pleaded. "It won't solve anything."

"Something has to be done!" Apollo snapped as he entered the room, followed by Starbuck.

"Captain," Cassie addressed him, blocking his way, "our patients are not to be disturbed."

Apollo stopped, hesitated on seeing the look on Cassie's face.

"Come on…let's go." Starbuck caught Apollo's elbow, trying to pull him back towards the entrance. "I'll buy. Several rounds it you want."

There was a silent standoff as Cassie refused to give way and Apollo's fury vied with what shreds of rational thought remained to him.

Cassie heard a delighted screech from the inner rooms, and then a man's voice raised in frustration. "Yargh…it would be easier to just rip the damn uniform off!"

"Apollo!" Cassie and Starbuck both yelled trying to catch him as he pushed his way past and bolted for the inner rooms.

A sick feeling came over Cassie as she dashed after Apollo, saw him pulling his sidearm out.

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"It hasn't been that long." Athena giggled, helping him with the stuck fastener at the collar of her uniform tunic.

"It's been far too long…," he murmured and pressed his lips to her cheek. "Is this some military secret?…ah, yes…." The stubborn fastener finally gave way and he freed her throat and shoulders from the obstructing fabric. Athena felt his fingers slide through her hair, caress the back of her neck. As he kissed her shoulders and throat, she arched her neck backwards surrendering to him.

"Get away from her!" A sharp voice commanded. Athena looked towards the doorway to see Apollo, his face dark with fury, his gun aimed.

"No!" Athena shrieked, throwing herself between the gun and Baltar. She heard the horribly loud discharge of the laser pistol, saw the room spin around her, felt the percussive shock of the bolt as it hit.